My wife and I go to the Cove Bar for the Lobster Nachos and "The View." The Nachos and "The View" are worth standing in line for an hour-which this over 40 couple are up for on a regular basis. The drinks are standard, not great (if you like tiki drinks, you will be disappointed and YOU MUST go to Trader Sams). We LOVE HL, but no view and the eats are not so memorable. We go there regularly for the quality of the space, the relaxing ambiance, and their drinks. WE LOVE the lounge at Carthay-GREAT ambiance, great drinks, less than 20 minute wait, and the food has earned its way into our regular rotation. Seriously, some of their appetizers/food is killer. My wife and I go to the Alfresco Terrace lounge for wine, some lovely appetizers, and a GREAT view of Radiator Springs. It is also QUITE relaxing up there. We also saw a Disney cat once.
In summary, if you think she would like an AMAZING appetizer (the Lobster Nachos) and a CLASSIC view (if you time it right, you can even watch the light/fountain show from up there in the evening), go for the Cove Bar. If you are looking for some down time, look at the Carthay and the Alfresco Terrace, and of course you have the HL.
I should note my wife and I have not been to the Napa Lounge, but we are more than interested. Finally, on one lovely occasion, we were seated in front of the fireplace at the Grand Californian. My wife ran off to the HL and got a couple drinks, and we had the most relaxing and enjoyable time catching our breath.
Please let us know what you decide next, and how it goes!