Have/would you leave your kids sleeping alone in the room and go f/swim? *SEE #159*

[worm761]

Not saying I would or wouldn't do this but just trying to figure it out. Not to OP but to other people. Do you put the kids to bed at night and sit outside on a warm summer night. Can you see your door? can you see all your doors and windows? Someone could come into your house while your sitting outside. Do you ever stand outside and talk to your neighbours?
If the pool is in fullview of the door and they have a monitor, don't see a problem with it. Let the older ones know that if they wake up and you aren't there just look outside or holler. I have seen a hotel where rooms face the pool. OP never said if she was staying on site so we can not judge.

Just wondering if anyone posted is a smoker. Would you go to the smoking area and have a cigarette and leave your kids in the room alone, don't say your spouse would be there cause what if they are not.

Honestly? I did sit outside a few years ago but then my son is a teenager. I now also have a baby. I don't sit outside or stand outside and talk to my neighbors after my baby is in bed. It just isn't safe. And I have a huge bull mastiff that tells me when someone even walks in front of my house.
OP is talking about staying at CBR, an onsite resort. I don't feel it is safe to leave three kids under ten in a hotel room by themselves. I would not do it. I cannot see how anyone thinks it is safe to do. There was a thread on the resorts board a while back (looked and can't find it) that posted how her daughter's finger tips were cut off by the bathroom door. She was in the room when this happened. How is leaving them alone safe? I just would never do it.

 

[hauntedmansionmom17]

It's terribly irresponsible.

God forbid there's an emergency like a fire and your 8 year old is responsible for getting the 6 and 2 year old out of the room.

But more realistically, what if one of the children fall and hurt themselves, what if one has a nightmare, what if one throws up out of nowhere. It will take you several minutes to make it out of the pool and back to and into the room, all the while leaving your children to look for their parents.

If swimming is that important to you, make time for it during the course of your day. And if you can't fit it in, swimming will be one of the many sacrifices you have to make being a parent...

Totally agree with all of the above. The fact that someone is entertaining this idea makes me sick to my stomach. So many possibilities of things that could go wrong...please consider putting the safety of your children above anything else.

 

[MistressMerryweather]

It's terribly irresponsible.

God forbid there's an emergency like a fire and your 8 year old is responsible for getting the 6 and 2 year old out of the room.

But more realistically, what if one of the children fall and hurt themselves, what if one has a nightmare, what if one throws up out of nowhere. It will take you several minutes to make it out of the pool and back to and into the room, all the while leaving your children to look for their parents.

If swimming is that important to you, make time for it during the course of your day. And if you can't fit it in, swimming will be one of the many sacrifices you have to make being a parent...

Okay, I'm not saying you're silly, but I do find all these examples to be so silly. What in the world is the difference in between being in my own home and feet from the one hotel room door?! How come no one is answering any of these questions, such as the pp posted. Do you sit on your front porch after the kids are asleep? If you have connecting rooms, do you leave both inside doors wide open at all time when the kids are asleep. (Personally, I have never locked either of them, but leave both open a crack.)

I mean, I just can't keep saying how floored I am at the responses. Maybe it's just the group of people on tonight. People post on here all the time that they *lock* their children in their rooms at night(not I), leave them cry to sleep(not I), would never use a monitor(not I). Do they know if their baby is sleeping in vomit all night or perhaps had a seizure even? What if there is a fire and their door is locked? What if they fall our of bed while they are crying to sleep and crack their head open. For pity sakes!

ETA: My mind is made up. My opinion is that I don't see a problem with it "under the right circumstance".
I didn't post for advice, I posted just because I was wondering what others would/or would not do.

 

[worm761]

I am going to tell you what I tell my teen son: Just because other people do it, doesn't make it right.

 

[MistressMerryweather]

I am going to tell you what I tell my teen son: Just because other people do it, doesn't make it right.

It's a matter of opinion. All the things I said above to me are very wrong and to someone else, many many here on the Dis, think it's just fine and dandy. I doubt highly I would be arrested for sitting in a pool chair 5 ft from my hotel room door and it's fairly doubtful if I was hanging on the pool edge feet away chatting with my dh and watching the door.

ETA: I just questioned dh about it. Reminding him of the CBR rooms on the pool, near where we stayed last time we were there. He agreed that you could kick a pool chair by stretching your leg out the door. He then reminded me of how many parents hire one of those babysitting services so they can go out. I know how they work, I used to work for one long ago. He said, "I would much rather sit 25 feet away facing the hotel room door with a monitor than invite a complete stranger to come in and sit with my kids while I am off watching fireworks miles away." Yet most people think nothing of that. Just a matter of opinion.

 

[QVCshopper]

Just a question, how do you know which room you'll be getting and how far away it will be from the pool? I never know where I'll end up until I check in.

 

[scrapquitler]

Personally, I wouldn't do it. The main reason why is because I doubt that I'd be able to hear the baby monitor over the normal sounds of the pool, even if the pool area were relatively quiet. Instead if I wanted to go swimming, DH would stay in the room while I went, and then we would trade off. Maybe if the room was RIGHT next to the pool one of us would sit on a chair in the doorway with the room open while the other swam.

Of course I won't even leave the kids in the car while I walk into the gas station to pay.

 

[MistressMerryweather]

Just a question, how do you know which room you'll be getting and how far away it will be from the pool? I never know where I'll end up until I check in.

I would go scout out the actual rooms when I got there and make a request when checking in.

 

[magicwishes]

I would be concerned that you wouldn't hear them as the pool may be noisy, your head may be under water, and something could happen that wouldn't be very noisy but needs to be attended to. Even if no one is in danger, a 6 and/or 8 year old could do something stupid or destructive if they woke up and knew no one was around to watch them. I would also be concerned one would wake up and then wake up the others. I also wouldn't want to have to run in to the room and comfort a child when I was soaking wet. I wouldn't do it for safety reasons, but I think there are plenty of other reasons not to do it.

 

[nchulka]

Ahhh! These threads drive me nuts, of course it's fine! I wouldn't feel comfortable if I could not see the door, but you already said you would only do it if you could see the door, so what is the problem? There are seriously people who do not go out into their own yards while their kids are asleep???? Everyone who spends so much time hovering over their kids really needs to see the documentary Babies and see how kids around the world are raised. They are left alone, and with wild animals running about no less, and guess what at the end of the documentary all the babies were still alive! You know why we all know the name Madeline Mccann? Because what happened to her was so incredibly rare that it made headlines around the world! It happened in Europe several years ago, but the way the media hypes everything parents seem to think this sort of thing happens around every corner every day. Go, swim, enjoy, your kids will be sleeping when you return.

 

[MistressMerryweather]

I would be concerned that you wouldn't hear them as the pool may be noisy, your head may be under water, and something could happen that wouldn't be very noisy but needs to be attended to. Even if no one is in danger, a 6 and/or 8 year old could do something stupid or destructive if they woke up and knew no one was around to watch them. I would also be concerned one would wake up and then wake up the others. I also wouldn't want to have to run in to the room and comfort a child when I was soaking wet. I wouldn't do it for safety reasons, but I think there are plenty of other reasons not to do it.

The quiet pools by CBR and CSR that we stayed at in peak season were dead at night. I wouldn't go if it were noisy.(right circumstance and all )
I would never stick my head under the water, regardless. I have had to jump out of the shower and comfort a waking child before. It's not a big deal.

I guess I get to blend in and be one of the crazies on here for my lone pool parenting decision. LOL I also don't think it's clear to everyone what the "right circumstances" for us would be. Whether it matters to others or not.

 

[sbeaulieu]

I don't see too much of a problem with it, the way you are describing everything. If you are close enough to the room, I really don't see any issues. People are talking about fires in the room...seriously? How likely is that.

As for your other question about being outside at home while kids are sleeping inside. I'm outside my house all the time with my kids sleeping inside and I don't even use a monitor. Everyone on my street does this. I live on a military base where all of my neighbors have kids. Whether we are shoveling snow, watching the older ones play, or just talking with neighbors, it has never been a big deal.

 

[Temporaryname]

Honestly, I wouldn't do it. I know that it's just a few feet away. But, you won't be able to see if someone comes into the room (God forbid). It's not worth it..

The only rooms I know with exterior doors have windows right next to them, and nowhere else so if you could see the door you would presumably see if someone broke in.

I am on the fence about this OP, although I don't know why. At 8 I regularly left my 8 year old asleep in my apartment to go down the hall to the washing machines and switch a load to the dryers. That's probably less safe since I couldn't see OR hear.

 

[JennCa]

I'm think the answer is if you are ok with it, then it's your choice.

Here are some crazy things I have done!

*I use the baby monitor and do gardening outside while the baby is asleep inside. It's usually during the spring and I leave the window open and he is in the crib. I don't view it any different than if I were downstairs inside the house.

* When my son falls asleep in the car while driving, I let him sleep in our garage when it's not too hot and with the windows rolled down and I clean the garage or garden so that way I am right there when he wakes up.

My grandmother tells me that in her generation they used to stick the baby in the stroller outside the door and leave them there for a while to get fresh air. She also said that when girls were 8-9 years old they babysat the younger ones and she woudl actually go to the store, etc. I think it is all relative and it is up to you and your comfort level what you choose.

Jenn

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

We have a pool at our house and I wouldn't leave my 13 month old alone in the house while I sat outside swimming and my pool is about 10 feet from my house. Even with a monitor but that is just me. It sounds like you have made up your mind so good luck.

When do you start allowing kids to do things that you wouldn't allow a 13 month old do? I didn't allow my 13 month old to climb stairs or go into the bathroom without me. I didn't allow him to eat with a fork, or be in a swimming pool without me touching him, or climb the playground equipment with a spotter. Frankly I wouldn't have lived in a house without a locked fence between the pool and the house with a 13 month old, but that's just me.

Amazingly, I now allow my 11 year old to do all these things without thinking twice. (Well except living in a house with a pool, but I would if I could afford it) Does that mean I've gotten neglectful in my old age?

The OP has an 8 year old. Old enough to wake up and remember why they're in a strange place, to open a door and call to mom and dad, and to use the bathroom independently. I teach my child age appropriate independence and then I let him use it. It's how you prepare your child for ever increasing challenges like learning how to drive, and going off to college. Although I guess if I only allowed things that 13 months old can do safely I wouldn't allow either of those either.

OP, I say wait until you get there and see how close you are. See how your kids sleep the first night, talk to them and see how they'd feel if they woke up and you weren't there, and then decide what's right for YOUR kids.

 

[smidgy]

i think everyone is getting WAY too down on the OP.

when my boys were young, everyone in our neighborhood hung out in each other's driveways on summer evenings.. after the kids went to bed.

many people sit out on their decks, on their front porches, on their nieghbor's front porches, in summer evenings. if the children are small, they use the baby monitors (heaven help us old folk who didn't have thse when OUR kids were little!!)

we had a room at pop , ground floor, our room was STEPS away from the pool!!!

the only thing bothering me is that one is 2 years old. the 6 and 8 year old, no problem... when my oldest was 8, I started leaving him alone for a half hour at a time. geez, years ago, 10 year olds were running plows.
I was taking 3 buses, in Chicago, to the beach when I was 12. but these days, we "take total care of" our children until they are 15, then think they can take care of themselves when they are 18?

I digress.. OP, if you have a monitor, can see the room door, tell the kids where you are, check on them... you're fine.

 

[momof3poohlovers]

When do you start allowing kids to do things that you wouldn't allow a 13 month old do? I didn't allow my 13 month old to climb stairs or go into the bathroom without me. I didn't allow him to eat with a fork, or be in a swimming pool without me touching him, or climb the playground equipment with a spotter. Frankly I wouldn't have lived in a house without a locked fence between the pool and the house with a 13 month old, but that's just me.

Amazingly, I now allow my 11 year old to do all these things without thinking twice. (Well except living in a house with a pool, but I would if I could afford it) Does that mean I've gotten neglectful in my old age?

The OP has an 8 year old. Old enough to wake up and remember why they're in a strange place, to open a door and call to mom and dad, and to use the bathroom independently. I teach my child age appropriate independence and then I let him use it. It's how you prepare your child for ever increasing challenges like learning how to drive, and going off to college. Although I guess if I only allowed things that 13 months old can do safely I wouldn't allow either of those either.

OP, I say wait until you get there and see how close you are. See how your kids sleep the first night, talk to them and see how they'd feel if they woke up and you weren't there, and then decide what's right for YOUR kids.

I actually have a 19, 15, and 13 year old as well so obviously I know about allowing children to do things as they mature. I know it is hard to believe but my 19 year old actually goes to college in another state. Also, we do have a fence around our pool as well as alarms on the doors leading out to the pool. No where did I say that I didn't have a fence. The pool was put in long before our 13 month old surprise was born.

Just because I wouldn't leave my 8, 6, and 2 year old alone in a hotel room doesn't mean I don't allow my children to mature or do things I don't allow my 13 month old to do. That is a completely ridiculous argument. Letting an 11 year old eat with a fork or climb stairs is far different than leaving your children alone in a hotel room. I don't know, why don't you tell the front desk what you plan on doing and why you need a room right by the pool and see what they say about it.

 

[Temporaryname]

 

[smidgy]

. Letting an 11 year old eat with a fork or climb stairs is far different than leaving your children alone in a hotel room. I don't know, why don't you tell the front desk what you plan on doing and why you need a room right by the pool and see what they say about it.

see, I think some people don't understand the difference between a Disneny deluxe resort, Moderate, resort and value resort.

WE actually PREFER the moderates and deluxes, bacuase we like to leave our room and be outside.

this poster is picturing the OP. wlaking out her room, down a long hallway, knto the elvator, etc etc.

I have stayed atall 4 disney moderate level resortsand all 4 disney Value resorts.
as the OP stated IF she gets a room right by the pool.

now, if you have little ones asleep by 9 pm, and you are still wide awake, aren't you going to step outside the room?
bring your chairs out? or, if you are lucky enough to hae room near the pool area, with a table and chairs, sit there? maybe have a cocktail, play cards?

ops, sounds like THIS group might callDCFS if you dare enjoy an adult bevearge while in charge of your own children, never mind...

 

[MistressMerryweather]

Ahhh! These threads drive me nuts, of course it's fine! I wouldn't feel comfortable if I could not see the door, but you already said you would only do it if you could see the door, so what is the problem? There are seriously people who do not go out into their own yards while their kids are asleep???? Everyone who spends so much time hovering over their kids really needs to see the documentary Babies and see how kids around the world are raised. They are left alone, and with wild animals running about no less, and guess what at the end of the documentary all the babies were still alive! You know why we all know the name Madeline Mccann? Because what happened to her was so incredibly rare that it made headlines around the world! It happened in Europe several years ago, but the way the media hypes everything parents seem to think this sort of thing happens around every corner every day. Go, swim, enjoy, your kids will be sleeping when you return.

I don't see too much of a problem with it, the way you are describing everything. If you are close enough to the room, I really don't see any issues. People are talking about fires in the room...seriously? How likely is that.

As for your other question about being outside at home while kids are sleeping inside. I'm outside my house all the time with my kids sleeping inside and I don't even use a monitor. Everyone on my street does this. I live on a military base where all of my neighbors have kids. Whether we are shoveling snow, watching the older ones play, or just talking with neighbors, it has never been a big deal.

The only rooms I know with exterior doors have windows right next to them, and nowhere else so if you could see the door you would presumably see if someone broke in.

I am on the fence about this OP, although I don't know why. At 8 I regularly left my 8 year old asleep in my apartment to go down the hall to the washing machines and switch a load to the dryers. That's probably less safe since I couldn't see OR hear.

I'm think the answer is if you are ok with it, then it's your choice.

Here are some crazy things I have done!

*I use the baby monitor and do gardening outside while the baby is asleep inside. It's usually during the spring and I leave the window open and he is in the crib. I don't view it any different than if I were downstairs inside the house.

* When my son falls asleep in the car while driving, I let him sleep in our garage when it's not too hot and with the windows rolled down and I clean the garage or garden so that way I am right there when he wakes up.

My grandmother tells me that in her generation they used to stick the baby in the stroller outside the door and leave them there for a while to get fresh air. She also said that when girls were 8-9 years old they babysat the younger ones and she woudl actually go to the store, etc. I think it is all relative and it is up to you and your comfort level what you choose.

Jenn

When do you start allowing kids to do things that you wouldn't allow a 13 month old do? I didn't allow my 13 month old to climb stairs or go into the bathroom without me. I didn't allow him to eat with a fork, or be in a swimming pool without me touching him, or climb the playground equipment with a spotter. Frankly I wouldn't have lived in a house without a locked fence between the pool and the house with a 13 month old, but that's just me.

Amazingly, I now allow my 11 year old to do all these things without thinking twice. (Well except living in a house with a pool, but I would if I could afford it) Does that mean I've gotten neglectful in my old age?

The OP has an 8 year old. Old enough to wake up and remember why they're in a strange place, to open a door and call to mom and dad, and to use the bathroom independently. I teach my child age appropriate independence and then I let him use it. It's how you prepare your child for ever increasing challenges like learning how to drive, and going off to college. Although I guess if I only allowed things that 13 months old can do safely I wouldn't allow either of those either.

OP, I say wait until you get there and see how close you are. See how your kids sleep the first night, talk to them and see how they'd feel if they woke up and you weren't there, and then decide what's right for YOUR kids.

i think everyone is getting WAY too down on the OP.

when my boys were young, everyone in our neighborhood hung out in each other's driveways on summer evenings.. after the kids went to bed.

many people sit out on their decks, on their front porches, on their nieghbor's front porches, in summer evenings. if the children are small, they use the baby monitors (heaven help us old folk who didn't have thse when OUR kids were little!!)

we had a room at pop , ground floor, our room was STEPS away from the pool!!!

the only thing bothering me is that one is 2 years old. the 6 and 8 year old, no problem... when my oldest was 8, I started leaving him alone for a half hour at a time. geez, years ago, 10 year olds were running plows.
I was taking 3 buses, in Chicago, to the beach when I was 12. but these days, we "take total care of" our children until they are 15, then think they can take care of themselves when they are 18?

I digress.. OP, if you have a monitor, can see the room door, tell the kids where you are, check on them... you're fine.

see, I think some people don't understand the difference between a Disneny deluxe resort, Moderate, resort and value resort.

WE actually PREFER the moderates and deluxes, bacuase we like to leave our room and be outside.

this poster is picturing the OP. wlaking out her room, down a long hallway, knto the elvator, etc etc.

I have stayed atall 4 disney moderate level resortsand all 4 disney Value resorts.
as the OP stated IF she gets a room right by the pool.

now, if you have little ones asleep by 9 pm, and you are still wide awake, aren't you going to step outside the room?
bring your chairs out? or, if you are lucky enough to hae room near the pool area, with a table and chairs, sit there? maybe have a cocktail, play cards?

ops, sounds like THIS group might callDCFS if you dare enjoy an adult bevearge while in charge of your own children, never mind...

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I was starting to think maybe I am off my rocker. LOL I truly do respect the parenting choices of others, even if I think some are wrong, but I agree with smidgy.
I don't think some of y'all are picturing what I am picturing. I probably would be called a "helicopter" parent in most situations, but I trust my instincts as a mama bear wholeheartedly and that is why I keep stressing, "in the right circumstance". I know how the rooms are poolside at the moderate resorts and I am fine sitting right outside the door on the ground, or a few feet away soaking in the pool.