Has anyone ever worked for a friend??

[Fishbone†]

Does it work??? What are your experiences.... good and bad??

Currently I have a job offer (which I have accepted), working for a friend - I would report directly to her. She is not a long time friend for me, but she is the wife of my fiance's best friend, and we get along very well.

Short version of the dilemma....

My current company REALLY wants me to stay, and has countered with a nice offer...... something the other company was not willing to do right off the top. I love the people I work with right now, and can honestly say that out of 37 guys that I work for, there isn't one that I don't like. They are really a great group. I just don't like the work - it's a bit boring, and while they are willing to offer me more challenges now, I really like working with numbers and Excel, and that's just not here.

The other job really appeals to me, but like I said, they wouldn't budge on the offer, and I'd be working for this friend, and I don't have a history there, so I don't know if there will be people there that frustrate me or not. There's something to be said about coming home without the drama of an office environment (you fellow cube-mates know what I'm talking about). Also, with the counter offer, I would be taking less money to leave at this point.

There's a lot more to this obviously, but based on what I've shared.....
Any advice?? Any experience??

 

[Maleficent13]

I have never worked for a friend, but I have had friends work for me. It's not the best situation, to be honest. It adds a level of stress, because you feel stymied in that you (or rather, me, personally) feel awkward about addressing personal issues for fear it will affect your work relationship.

Regarding the other issue, well, if it was me I'd take the bird in the hand rather than the one in the bush. If the job you currently have is more lucrative and stress-free, then I'd probably stay right there.

JMHO, YMMV.

 

[WatchinCaptKangaroo]

In your current situation I'd stay where you are. If a personal disagreement happens between you and your friend you'll probably find yourself in an uncomfortable work environment.

Perhaps you can do contracting work for your friend to test the waters and stay where you are full time. Extra cash with the security you have. If it works out you can re-evaluate.

 

[LindaR]

Here's my story. Many years ago when I was in the Air Force, I got an assignment to the same base and same shop as my best BEST friend. We were going to share an apartment also. We talked long and hard about seperating work from "home". Our friendship was more important to us than anything else. Sherri (my friend) had been working in this shop for a year. I was going to be her boss.

Because we put so much effort into it (and 25 years later are still best friends) we were able to make it work. HOWEVER........those around us unintentionally and sometimes intentionally, would try to create problems. It is not a situation that I would recommend.

I have also been in this situation other times/other bases and the outcome was not good.

 

[Fishbone†]

Okay - I'm with you all....... thank you.

Now....

I've actually verbally accepted the position. I also happen to know (due to the friend thing), that I'm heads above the second candidate, and that "V" doesn't like the second candidate. My first red flag to the friend thing was that when "V" thought I was calling to decline, she was very "stiff" on the phone, but it was the situation she was upset at not me.... .she thought she was going to have to work with the second candidate and doesn't want to...

SO..... if this were a neutral company I could rescind my acceptance and never look back, but that's not the case here. How do I unaccept and retain my friendship. And I don't know whether that's here nor there, but I did not go looking for a new job - "V" called me and asked if I wanted to interview for it. At the time I was bored, and thought what the heck..... now offers, and options later I don't know what to do.

 

[Maleficent13]

Is "V" aware that your current company countered? If so, is she willing to meet their offer?

If she isn't willing to meet the money, I would say that's your very reasonable out right there.

 

[horseshowmom]

Okay - I'm with you all....... thank you.

Now....

I've actually verbally accepted the position. I also happen to know (due to the friend thing), that I'm heads above the second candidate, and that "V" doesn't like the second candidate. My first red flag to the friend thing was that when "V" thought I was calling to decline, she was very "stiff" on the phone, but it was the situation she was upset at not me.... .she thought she was going to have to work with the second candidate and doesn't want to...

SO..... if this were a neutral company I could rescind my acceptance and never look back, but that's not the case here. How do I unaccept and retain my friendship. And I don't know whether that's here nor there, but I did not go looking for a new job - "V" called me and asked if I wanted to interview for it. At the time I was bored, and thought what the heck..... now offers, and options later I don't know what to do.

I can't see how anybody (friend or otherwise) could blame you for not taking (or in this case, keeping) the job that's going to be the most financially lucrative for you.

It's not your fault that V doesn't want to work with the second candidate. The situation would have been the same had you chosen not to interview for the new position.

Good luck!

 

[noseybuddy]

I worked for a friend. Everybody including my DH advised me not to do it, said it wasn't a good idea. I didn't listen of course, and to make a long story short, we are not friends anymore.

 

[WatchinCaptKangaroo]

How do I unaccept and retain my friendship.

Tell V that you've decided to stay where you are. That it would not be in your best interest to take this pay cut. You could also tell her that you've thought about it and in the best interests of everyones friendships you've decided to decline.

It's really not your fault that V was counting on you to take it so she didn't find another desireable candidate.