Has anyone ever not "connected" with their tablemates?

[Liz]

Just wondering if anyone has ever been seated with another family/group and it just seemed like you didn't have anything in common or anything to talk about? I'm kind of shy but luckily I have a DH and DS who can talk to anybody about anything.

 

[brack]

In five cruises the answer is no. As a matter of fact we had tablemates that cruised again and we requested them to sit with us.

 

[lbgraves]

Thanks to the DIS meets board, no. We linked our resies with another family with kids for our first cruise & did the same for the second. We are cruising again with them on 2 more cruises that we have booked and see each other when they vacation near us.

 

[JLDSMD]

We really didn't connect with our tablemates on our last cruise. DW is really good at getting people to talk and it was still like pulling teeth. They had a DD about the age of our DS, but the two never talked to each other. I'm not saying they were a bad family, don't get me wrong. We just found it very hard to talk to/with them.

DW wants to be at a table with other people on our next two cruises. We always try to meet new friends while we're on vacation.

Go with an open mind and try to get to know them. You may make really good friends in the process. And if you don't, the cruise will be over eventually.

 

[WDWLVR]

We ended up sitting with the same couple on 3 different cruises and it was rough. Oh wait....those were my in-laws! Ok so those 3 don't count. On our other 3 cruises we sat with strangers twice and it was ok. Good dinner conversation and I honestly couldn't tell you their names now and we never kept in touch. On our last cruise we met a great group of people on our cruise meets thread and linked dinner reservations. We ended up at a table for 10 with 5 other tables of DISers around us. It was wonderful! We've linked dinner reservations with DISers for our next two cruises as well!

 

[calmom]

On our honeymoon (on a different cruise line) we sat with a family that we were pretty sure were members of a racist group. It was a terrible dinner - I kept kicking my husband under the table to tell him not to try to debate them as it was a no win situation. We went straight to guest services the first night, explained the situation and switched dinner times (early to late). We ran into them a couple days later and blamed the dinner time not working. If you end up in a similar situation, I strongly suggest bailing out right away. Not worth the frustration. Other cruises, we have always been able to find some common thread and enjoyed our tablemates. Lisa

 

[webray]

Only once did we not connect, and thank goodness it was our three night cruise and not the 7 or 14 nights..lol.

When we arrived, hubby, myself and daughter (21), there was another couple seated at a table for six. They had expected to have this entire table to themselves. When we sat down, they made rude comments about having to sit with other people. With the small amount of conversation we had with them we found out they were both ministers.

We had Palo the next night and room service the last night. We never saw them again on the ship.

Other than that..always oustanding tablemates, everyone as happy to be there as we are and full of conversation. In fact, there are several couples from each cruise that we have remained friends with through the years.

 

[my3kids]

It was hard because the other family at our table was just on a different time schedule. We were consistantly right on time, they were consistantly a half hour late. Very friendly folks, and we learned after the first night that the waiter wanted to go ahead and take our orders. The other family came in usually as we were finishing our appetizers.

 

[Verandah Man]

On the three cruises that we have taken so far, we also linked our ressie with other families from our cruise meets thread. I'm happy to say that we have remained good friends and e-mail one another quite often. For our August 2006 cruise, we have a large group of DIS'ers that have already linked our ressies together. I'm not sure how many tables we will have, but it is sure going to be quite a few!!!

 

[musicgirl]

Mary, thanks for the giggle!

Our first cruise, I was not a member on this board, I know, the horror of it all! We sat with a couple and the 19-20 year old kids. Very nice people, we chatted without problems. Fortunately, they didn't mind ds's (then 11) excitement and constant babbling on. It would have been nice to be seated with someone with kids his age. But it really was fine.

2nd cruise-with my sister's family-enough said.

3rd cruise-we hooked up with Mom2Belle&PeterPan ahead of time and had a great time!!! They are of course sailing without us on the repo . If you are sitting with them, have a great time!!!

We are hoping to do the same on our cruise in June.

 

[pclaire]

On our july 17th cruise my dd7 and I were seated with an older couple, who were nice, but very quiet; didnt seem happy that my dd was there. I tried to start conversations the entire dinner - no luck. It was very awkward. After dinner I asked if there was a table available with kids, and we got moved. There's just no point in being uncomfortable for a whole week. Our servers that night made a point of coming over to the new table and talking to my dd every night!!! they were wonderful, and I felt bad leaving them. We gave them a good tip even tho they took care of us only one night.

 

[kcashner]

If it isn't working for you, just go to the head server. You will be moved to another dining room or seating...not just across the room so they look at you and wonder why.

 

[clten]

On our first 7 night cruise, my sister and I were seated with 2 couples. I can't tell you their names because they never gave them to us. The first night one of the couples wasn't there. The other couple gave us QUITE a look when we showed up then turned and only talked to themselves the whole night. My sister and I just shrugged, talked to each other and our servers.

The next night the other couple showed up. I think they were nervous that we had all known each other and when my sister and I introduced ourselves they didn't; and when we asked later what their names were and didn't get a response we dropped it. (Our servers didn't even address anyone by name, which as I think back is kind of odd.) Well the second couple were younger and on their first cruise and were a little nervous. My sister and I decided we weren't going to eat in silence for 7 nights so we talked to each other and our servers and opened the conversation to the other couples, the younger couple did join in -- think they were just shy and not familiar with dining with strangers.

Eventually, I guess the first couple thought it was okay to converse with the second couple and therefore had to join in our conversation. They were not our favorite tablemates but we had a great time at dinner because we wanted to and because we had a great serving team. (We didn't ask to be moved because we really enjoyed our server and didn't want to give him up.)

 

[branv]

This is something that really worries me. I am VERY shy about introductions, but once you get me going, I'm pretty much chatty cathy. The worst part of this is that DH and I are unfortunately cursed. If we sit down in a movie theater, there's a 99% chance talkers, baby screamers or chair kickers are going to sit down behind us. When we lived in apts., we always ended up with the partiers or fighters living above us, and at weddings without assigned seats we end up sitting with the humorless pinched couple or their opposite "inappropriate jokes due to too much open bar" guy...and to round it out, of course when we've owned homes we always end up with the barking dog neighbor, and the weed-eats before 8 am guy.

Cursed, cursed I say!

Honestly though, what worries me most is this: how shockingly few people know how to carry on a civilized neutral conversation. With tablemates, these are people you don't have to be friends with, but you do have to live with for the mean time...just like in many situations in life - coworkers, neighbors, etc. Somehow, that doesn't keep them from bringing up a) politics b) religion c) sex. There is barely a word that comes out of my mouth that isn't some kind of humor, but I'm always very careful to make sure it's very harmless unless I know exactly what boundaries another person has. I just believe in diplomacy, and that manners are about making everyone around you comfortable. I'm just always amazed at how few people are that way, and I'm worried I'm going to end up with my mouth hanging open or with me biting my tongue from saying something sarcastic back.

I will take boring over boorish anyday.

 

[rsjj]

On our july 17th cruise my dd7 and I were seated with an older couple, who were nice, but very quiet; didnt seem happy that my dd was there. I tried to start conversations the entire dinner - no luck. It was very awkward. After dinner I asked if there was a table available with kids, and we got moved. There's just no point in being uncomfortable for a whole week. Our servers that night made a point of coming over to the new table and talking to my dd every night!!! they were wonderful, and I felt bad leaving them. We gave them a good tip even tho they took care of us only one night.

so how does this work?? when you move to a new table/time slot, you tip your "original" wait staff, not the new one that took care of you? is that correct?

stumbling across this thread...i'm getting a bit "nervous"! this will be our second cruise, and on our first one, we sat at a table by ourselves! (family of 4, 2 little ones) there were other families around us, w/little ones, and we chatted w/them...but basically, we had it all to ourselves. and didn't even think about this "sharing" bit. our DS6 is somewhat shy...DS4 is all "out there", but this tablemates deal is a whole new thing to them (us too). you know, eating w/strangers bit. (which i'm sure will be fine in the end!) but my thoughts are...should i "forewarn" the boys, that there's this possibility? or just let it be? what do you all think? and if you have little ones...did you tell them?

on second thought...maybe i'm just obsessing over this! oh, i don't know! any thoughts/input greatly appreciated!! thanx! we leave in a week and a half...

 

[Liz]

Thanks for the replies. I'm certainly not anticipating problems with tablemates but its interesting to see what people do if it was an uncomfortable situation. The only thing I can imagine happening where I'd feel extremely uncomfortable is if our tablemates used profanity or became inebriated.

Also (dare I say this) I wonder how people would react if they are the "strictly adhere to the dress code" type and they are seated with someone dressed nicely but wearing jeans, for example.

 

[Bethipooh4]

Our first Disney cruise (3 night) we sat with a family, who had no interest in sitting with us. The kept to themselves, and basically ignored us all 3 nights.

Our cruise last month, we were linked with some friends, but unfortunately had a falling out with them months before the cruise, I asked to have our ressies unlinked, and assumed it was done. (I should have checked when we got on the ship) Imagine our surprise when they were seated with us. It made for a very uncomfortable dinner, but thankfully we spoke to the powers that be and had our table changed for the rest of the cruise.

 

[Nik's Mom]

We have 2 other families that might be joining us on the cruise. If they happen to get the same dinner time, how can we link our ressies so we can sit together?

 

[clten]

We have 2 other families that might be joining us on the cruise. If they happen to get the same dinner time, how can we link our ressies so we can sit together?

Just call DCL or your TA and give them the res numbers of everyone you want linked. They will have you cross referenced as traveling together and hopefully put you at the same tables for dinner.

 

[clten]

should i "forewarn" the boys, that there's this possibility? or just let it be? ...maybe i'm just obsessing over this!

First I wouldn't obsess over it. If you think it might be a problem, when you get on board the ship, stop and see what size table they have put you at. (Either stop by Parrot Cay which should be serving lunch and the servers there can show you your assigned table. Or stop by Dining Changes and ask them what size table it is.) If it is a 4 person table, no worries. If it is larger, and you want to try it, you can explain it to your kids right before heading to dinner. (I think that way, they aren't worried or obsessing over it either to ruin your afternoon.) Just my two cents.