I go to
Disneyland about twice a month so I think I can probably help you out.
Get there at least by 10-11am. Get a Fastpass for Space Mountain very first thing. I wouldn't plan on going on Splash Mountain; it's probably going to be too cold and last time I rode it I got soaked from head to toe. When you can get another Fastpass, get one for Indiana Jones.
Other "must-do"s:
Pirates of the Caribbean
Haunted Mansion
Jungle Cruise
Big Thunder (don't get a Fastpass unless the line is out the entrance of the ride, the line goes pretty quick)
I really like the Tiki Room in Adventureland, all the "dark" rides(Snow White, etc), Storybookland Boats, Casey Junior Circus Train in Fantasyland. Mickey and Minnie's Houses in Toontown are fun too. Ride the train that goes around the whole park. Also, the Canoes and/or Mark Twain in Frontierland are really neat ways to get around and see the whole river.
As for food... I highly recommend the "French Market" in New Orleans Square for Creole type food and ambiance. "Redd Rockett's Pizza Port" in Tomorrowland for Italian is good. Disneyland doesn't really have the character meals like WDW does. Any of the burger places are really decent. You can also get gumbo or chowder in New Orleans Square that's reasonably priced.
Two great places to watch the fireworks (Remember... Dreams Come True), if you can't get one of the primo spots in front of the castle, is from the top of the train station at the very end of Main Street, or in Frontierland. SEE THE FIREWORKS!!! They are amazing! A cool thing to do is to watch the first showing of Fantasmic in Frontierland, and just stay put and watch the fireworks from there. You'll only wait a few minutes. The parade is pretty good, but parades really aren't my thing.
The ticket line at DL gets pretty long so factor that in. I'm not sure if you can buy tix ahead of time, or with a military discount. I think you can buy them online at Disneyland's site, though.
Prepare for a long day that will be just moderately crowded, more so as the day progresses. The weather should be nice, if a bit cool.
Make time to stop, just sit on a bench (with a cream cheese stuffed pretzel!) and enjoy the scenery. Disneyland is so pretty! Send me a private message if you have any other questions.
Have fun!
-Marcella