Given enough rope she will hang herself.

[EsmeraldaX]

Originally posted by septbride2002
So blame the father and mother who obviously ignore her. Don't blame the OP who is trying to help her by getting people outside involved in her life while trying to protect her own.

~Amanda

I agree.

 

[eeyore kelly]

If I misread the OP's intent, than I apologize. However, this little guy does not help her seem concerned--just gloating.

 

[Miss Jasmine]

Did I say the OP??? No, I said the adults.

And I do have a DD and DS by way of marriage. So I am speaking from experience. It has not been an easy road. There have been, and continue to be, many bumps along the way. But we work through them. And by we, I mean my DH, the kids mom, me and the kids.

It's sad though, if you look at statistics, second marriages or marriages involving stepchildren, have an even greater chance of ending in divorce than first marriages. It's because of the added stress of a blended family.

Edited to add: Eeyore Kelly, I agree with you. That didn't seem very sympathetic.

 

[sweet angel]

Originally posted by EsmeraldaX
Just because someone does not have kids of their own does not mean that they don't have a lot of experience with kids or spend time with kids on a very regular basis (teachers, counselors, doctors or family members like aunts and uncles who have their neices and nephews part of the time to help out etc).

I agree. I was speaking generally. There are many, many people who do not have kids, nor experience with kids that seem to know it all.

My point was that it's hard to judge without having walked that road.

And certainly it's harder in a blended situation, but sometimes, no matter what the parents do, it's just not enough.

 

[IceQueen777]

For me also this little smiley is what showed her lack of compassion for the child. The thread title sounds like someone who is gloating as well.

I think this is just another case of someone being nasty, then when people comment on the nastiness, they backtrack and try to make it sound like they are really concerned.

It happens all of the time.

 

[bjgrazi]

If I misread the OP's intent, than I apologize. However, this little guy does not help her seem concerned--just gloating.

This was meant for the neighbors are gabbing their heads off. The telephone chain. Not me gloating.

There is nothing to gloat about a little girl is ruining her life. Her parents aren't of any help and I'm helpless and very frustrated over the whole ordeal.

I'm not backtracking on anything. There weren't any smilely faces or anything of that sorts, no LOL nothing.

 

[Miss Jasmine]

There is also the title to this thread...

Given enough rope she will hang herself.

That didn't sound like concern either.

 

[bjgrazi]

Given enough rope she will hang herself.

Because she had been told to stop more than a few times. She can't seem to stop the fabrications. HER PARENTS are of no help and it has led to bigger problems now than myself or anyone could have imagined.

 

[EsmeraldaX]

Originally posted by sweet angel

My point was that it's hard to judge without having walked that road.

I agree there.

In any case, I feel very sad for the children involved.

 

[fireplug]

Steve

 

[Toby'sFriend]

poor kid.
I must admit I was concerned last week when you stated that you believed this girl "had alot of blame" in the break-up of your marriage. I don't think it is a huge stretch to assume that right now you are feeling some anger toward her, jusitified or not. I agree with the others, when a family breaks up it is so hard on the kids. It appears she is acting out and it is probably understandable.

But as adults I think it is always best to remember that WE are supposed to be able to control our impulses of anger when it is appropriate. I'd hate to think that you are for some reason trying to fight out your divorce with a 13yo kid on an internet bulletin board that she doesn't even read.

 

[bjgrazi]

Where have I shown anger and where am I fighting?

But I will say thanks to all of you I've learned a valuable lesson today.

 

[DisMN]

I didn't find anything wrong with the title of your thread nor did I feel like you were gloating about your ex stepdaughter getting into trouble.

From experience I know we (my husband and myself) have often made the statement "given enough rope she will hang herself".....

when someone you care about is in trouble but the last thing they do is listen to ANYONE, getting deeper and deeper, you do wish they'd hit the end of that rope so that they'd finally hopefully make an effort to stop the bad behavior.

The term "hitting the end of the rope" and "enough rope to hang themselves" pretty much mean the same thing IMHO.

I've also been where you are bjgrazi, where the neighbors (and in our case close friends AND relatives) don't want anything to do with the young person, but you yourself are still welcome in their homes. It's a very awkward situation to be in, isn't it? I feel for you.

The only thing that helped us in the end was just letting go. Let go and pray a LOT.......don't give up hope for the child but sometimes there isn't anything you CAN do to help them, sorry to say.

 

[decker96]

Originally posted by DisMN
I didn't find anything wrong with the title of your thread nor did I feel like you were gloating about your ex stepdaughter getting into trouble.

From experience I know we (my husband and myself) have often made the statement "given enough rope she will hang herself".....

when someone you care about is in trouble but the last thing they do is listen to ANYONE, getting deeper and deeper, you do wish they'd hit the end of that rope so that they'd finally hopefully make an effort to stop the bad behavior.

The term "hitting the end of the rope" and "enough rope to hang themselves" pretty much mean the same thing IMHO.

Well said. ITA.