Getting really fed up with my boss

[kwelch10377]

I am not even sure what to do anymore.

I don't even know how to explain all the issues. Most of the time we can't make any decisons without getting her ok, however when you can never nail her down for more than 5 minutes if makes it a little hard to get anything done. Then when decisons are made and the topic comes up again she will say that something totally different that she wants done or say that well we only talked about it we didn't make a final say.

Everything we do ends up being a much bigger production than needed. She always says she needs to ask her boss first if it is ok. Most of the time I don't even think she needs to, she is just afraid that her boss will not like the decision. This isn't even big stuff. One example is whether or not we wanted to include a group a people on a monthly email. It seriously took 3 weeks to get a final answer. It's not like she is even a low level boss, she is a director, one step above VP.

She comes across like she doesn't trust us to do anything or making any decisions on our own. She was out on maternity leave the end of summer/beginning of fall and we reported directly to her boss. Things ran great, we didn't have any of these issues. Her boss was ok with decisions that we made. You would think that knowing things ran great while she was gone, she would ease up a little, but nope. It is even worse than before and the fact that she is never around just adds to things.

As I did my performance apprasial, I realized how much of my objectives I wasn't able to get done last year and that most of them were directly related to her not being available. Even when we schedule meetings to get things done, she cancels them. I am suppose to have a weekly status meeting with her and she always cancels it. The last one I had was before Christmas. Some other meeting that she has to attend always comes up and it isn't just me that it happens to. (she has 5 direct reports)

The team in general is falling apart. 3 of us are looking for new positions (which she knows), there is tension between 2 of us that has gotten 10 times worse because of something my boss did and my one co-worker takes advantage of the fact that my boss is never around to come and go as she pleases. I talked to my boss a month about about the issues with my one co-worker and my boss said that she was so glad that I came to her and I am going to have a team meeting and do some team building activities and we are going to sort everything out. We have had no such meeting and we haven't even had out normal bi-weekly team meeting since Nov.

I just needed to vent. I know I should be happy I have a job and I generally like what I do, but things are just so fustrating right now.

 

[PUZZLDY5]

I'm sorry you have to deal with this. You said that everything ran smoothly while she was on maternity leave. Is their any way you can discuss the issues with HER boss and explain thateverything went very well while she was gone. If your going to look for further emplowment anyway it wont hurt to at least let her know what's going on. She may not even know what is going on right under her nose. (We have a few at my work like that.)

 

[kwelch10377]

I'm not sure if I would feel comfortable with going to her boss.

While I am looking for jobs elsewhere, they are within the same company. There are very few jobs open that I would even consider appying for and/or am qualified for and the one that I did apply for I would be working in the same dept, just a different director and VP. I would still have to partner with them, so I need to be very careful how I handle things.

I don't think there is really much I can do about the situation. I think eventually all this will come back to bite her in the you know what and she will figure out how bad things are.

 

[kamik86]

She was out on maternity leave the end of summer/beginning of fall and we reported directly to her boss. Things ran great, we didn't have any of these issues. Her boss was ok with decisions that we made. You would think that knowing things ran great while she was gone, she would ease up a little, but nope. It is even worse than before and the fact that she is never around just adds to things.

Lol I wonder if this is why she wants everything to go through her... She needs to do SOMETHING to justify her own job.

 

[Disney Doll]

You need to use email.
You need to put everything to her in writing so you have a paper trail. My guess is that the fact that everything ran smoothly without her is making her a bit nervous because she's probably realizing that she is VERY expendable.

Furthermore, if it comes back (say in your performance review) that you did not accomplish ABC goal, you have the proof that says "I tried to accomplish the goal. Here is what I did. I emailed Boss Suzy on x date, y date & z date. I never heard back & she did not want this project to move forward without her apprroval".

This is one of those situations where she will eventually hang herself. The question is can you stand it till she does?

 

[kwelch10377]

Lol I wonder if this is why she wants everything to go through her... She needs to do SOMETHING to justify her own job.

It is more that she is afraid of the wrong decision being made. We work with 1600 stores and 4 SVPs out in the field and they can be a little passionate about things. I think she does it more to protect us, but she needs to have some faith in us.

I get that many of the things I have to deal with need appoval, but she has to approve every little step, instead of letting us complete the project and then submit it for appoval.

 

[DMass]

If she can't trust anyone to make a decision and she's nowhere to be found, then I would stop and move on to something else until she's available to give you an answer.

My boss was like that. It used to be if I needed him to approve something I would be walking all over place looking for him and if I paged him he would never respond. There were times I would ask two and three times for approvals.

Now if I can't find him it all goes on his desk to be done when he has time. I don't repeat myself anymore: I tell him once, if he can't or won't take the time to see me, on his desk it goes. I can't be accountable for his lack of responsibility. I've got my own job to do.

 

[kwelch10377]

If she can't trust anyone to make a decision and she's nowhere to be found, then I would stop and move on to something else until she's available to give you an answer.

My boss was like that. It used to be if I needed him to approve something I would be walking all over place looking for him and if I paged him he would never respond. There were times I would ask two and three times for approvals.

Now if I can't find him it all goes on his desk to be done when he has time. I don't repeat myself anymore: I tell him once, if he can't or won't take the time to see me, on his desk it goes. I can't be accountable for his lack of responsibility. I've got my own job to do.

We can't always work like that with things. There are certain things that I can do that with, but what we do directly affects our retail stores and customers and I can't risk us as a company looking bad or losing a customer. As much as I would like to be able to do it and then say, "well I asked you" I can't bring myself to do it because it will back fire.

 

[ccgirl]

CYA.....Cover your behind!!! When I need something from my manager, or anyone else for that matter, it is always done via email so I have a paper trail on it. If the way she performs her job is negatively affecting mine I would say that. Being able to meet my goals set the year before has a direct relation to how much money my raise is.

Good luck.

 

[bettymae1121]

I have a great boss and I still make sure everything important is done by email (or if we talk over the phone I'll send an email with a sum-up of our conversation under the pretext of "just wanting to make sure we're on the same page"). I've needed any of it, but I like the "paper trail" it provides.

If you're looking to jump ship then I'd just ride it out, no sense rocking the boat if you're going to stay with the same company, but you'll want that paper trail. So if you aren't doing that already, start. If you're really paranoid about some of this stuff blowing back on you'd I may even print out the emails to keep hard copies of (just incase you're suddenly unemployed and lose access to your email).

 

[bumbershoot]

I don't even know how to explain all the issues. Most of the time we can't make any decisons without getting her ok, however when you can never nail her down for more than 5 minutes if makes it a little hard to get anything done. Then when decisons are made and the topic comes up again she will say that something totally different that she wants done or say that well we only talked about it we didn't make a final say.


She was out on maternity leave the end of summer/beginning of fall and we reported directly to her boss. Things ran great, we didn't have any of these issues. Her boss was ok with decisions that we made. You would think that knowing things ran great while she was gone, she would ease up a little, but nope. It is even worse than before and the fact that she is never around just adds to things.

Email is a must. And while making decisions, state clearly that the outcome of the email will be the decision. Or if you're having a conversation state "so this is the decision we're making? OK, I'll send you a confirmation email to make sure we're clear on this decision." And then do it, and make sure it saves to your Sent folder, or just CC yourself on it.

DH and I have had problems with "was this THE decision or just the prelim conversation", and stating things as clearly as possible during those conversations has made all the difference.

And emails with a difficult boss, CC'ing yourself, has made the difference with his work.


I too think she's got "middle manager" syndrome, where she HAS TO put herself in the middle of things to keep herself feeling like she's useful. DH had the ultimate middle manager until recently; she put herself in the middle of EVERYTHING, and stopped everything! The guys NEED TO be able to talk amongst themselves to work out plans for the next round of product testing, and she would physically put herself in the middle of the in-person talks and make suggestions. If they were talking about what didn't work, she would go on about negativity and how it's not good...but learning from mistakes is important, and she didn't see that talking about mistakes would keep them from happening in the future. She finally moved to a different department, and I"m sure she is more happy there...and I know her old team is too.

It just really sounds like she needs to interject herself for her own reasons.

We can't always work like that with things. There are certain things that I can do that with, but what we do directly affects our retail stores and customers and I can't risk us as a company looking bad or losing a customer. As much as I would like to be able to do it and then say, "well I asked you" I can't bring myself to do it because it will back fire.

I think the PP said that if you can't get ahold of her, just make her 100% aware of the issue and then move on to the next. Not that you should just make the decision. But that it gets tabled b/c you can't get ahold of her. Just be sure to email with a CC, write a note and keep a copy, etc, so she KNOWS that she's either in charge of it, or needs to come back to you with a decision as soon as she gets back to her office.

 

[JoiseyMom]

I agree with the others...CYA! Email email email. Send emails either following up on verbal conversations or sending her emails to ask when her decisions are, then if she comes to you verbally, follow it up with her in email.