frustration with cheer team

[kidzmom3]

I just had to vent a little. I am frustrated with my 2 dd's cheer team. They cheer for an "all star" team, which is a competitive team. The girls are aged 7-11, so they are young and I understand this. It is very expensive, but I really just want the girls to have some fun, some exercise, some team work. What I don't want is 2 girls fooling around 2 weeks before a competition and causing problems for the whole team. Their parents were here tonight and did nothing! The coach was doing her best, along with her helpers, but one of the girls just would not stay in line. If they even paused for a minute she was flipping and lying on the floor. It is really frustrating. Oh well, Hopefully they will do well in the competition.

 

[kbkids]

Hey!! We had that same child on our team last year!! She absolutely drove me insane! And the Mom wouldn't do a thing about it. And get this, finally a few of the girls started yelling at her because they knew she was going to screw up at competition. THEN the Mom had something to say - she yelled at the girls for being mean to her little baby!!

 

[VirtuallyMe]

We used to do dance teams- and my youngest daughter just didn't have her heart in the competition- she loved performing but hated competition

In the pre-competition rehearsals she would always halfway do the dance routine and I'd hear mom's saying "that little girl is going to ruin it for the whole team" not realizing I was with in ear shot... But she always did fine in competition- gave it her all and performed great- she just was never one of those 110% girls... and she quit when that season was over.

I know not the same thing- but sometimes the kids are doing the teams because their moms want them too- or like with my dd because her big sister did it- so she wanted to too but they just didn't have it in them

Chances are this little girl is trying to mess up that or she is just bored or isn't ready but Mom is...

But clueless moms are par for the course at most of these competitions- the ones who see no wrong in their own children but are probably the first to point it out in another kid

Good luck with the competition-

 

[trip]

The coach should have firm rules in place to handle these situations. She should also have a form that the parents and child read and sign at the start of the year explaining punishments for disruptions. This type of cheering is expensive and the whole team shouldn't have to put up with uncooperative members. They should be warned, benched, and then dismissed.

 

[robinb]

How old were the girls? My 7-year old always goofs off at swim team practice. She is too young to have the ability to concentrate enough. She does better at swim meets, but we try to keep it low pressure and fun for her. Perhaps these girls are the same and they will do better at the competition.

 

[robinb]

The coach should have firm rules in place to handle these situations. She should also have a form that the parents and child read and sign at the start of the year explaining punishments for disruptions. This type of cheering is expensive and the whole team shouldn't have to put up with uncooperative members. They should be warned, benched, and then dismissed.

That's pretty harsh for a 7-year old, don't you think?

 

[luvflorida]

I just had to vent a little. I am frustrated with my 2 dd's cheer team. They cheer for an "all star" team, which is a competitive team. The girls are aged 7-11, so they are young and I understand this. It is very expensive, but I really just want the girls to have some fun, some exercise, some team work. What I don't want is 2 girls fooling around 2 weeks before a competition and causing problems for the whole team. Their parents were here tonight and did nothing! The coach was doing her best, along with her helpers, but one of the girls just would not stay in line. If they even paused for a minute she was flipping and lying on the floor. It is really frustrating. Oh well, Hopefully they will do well in the competition.

I don't understand why the coach would put up with that kind of behavior. I would think that the coach would say something to the kids and the parents.

 

[elijahpep]

I can feel your pain. My DD is on a select basketball team. We started play last week. After months of practice, we still a have girl that slacks so much and is always playing around and not listening during practice. We have had fund raisers and so far aren't out personally much money, but the time the team has put in practicing so much and so often, it's just really frustrating.
I know that you were reffering to cheer team (they work REALLy hard) but 2 out of 3 of last games our coach didn't even show up. The girls lost horribly our first game. Coachless the girls lost 48-8. It was a real downer.
BE thankful you at least have dedicated coaches who have the ability to show for games. I hope both all your girls on the cheer teams do very well
this season. It's always fun to watch talented and well practiced cheerleaders!!!!

As far as the slackers, getting to my point, I guess they can be in every sport. Still doesn't make it any easier to take as a parent of a kid who is giving it there all and are displaying talent and dedicated practice skills.

~DW

 

[elijahpep]

The coach should have firm rules in place to handle these situations. She should also have a form that the parents and child read and sign at the start of the year explaining punishments for disruptions. This type of cheering is expensive and the whole team shouldn't have to put up with uncooperative members. They should be warned, benched, and then dismissed.

I so Completely Agree with this! In so many ways! Any additional select sport is costly and very time consuming. I also understand and agree with some others that say that kids should enjoy what they are participating in, HOWEVER, it's really hard on the kids who are determined and studious to what is occuring in practice misbehavoir can lead to missed points and guidance that help a team improve as a whole. JMHO

~DW

 

[kbkids]

I so Completely Agree with this! In so many ways! Any additional select sport is costly and very time consuming. I also understand and agree with some others that say that kids should enjoy what they are participating in, HOWEVER, it's really hard on the kids who are determined and studious to what is occuring in practice misbehavoir can lead to missed points and guidance that help a team improve as a whole. JMHO

~DW

Exactly!! A competition team is a whole other breed from a regular cheer team. They are extremely expensive, and the participants and their parents should be able to expect that everyone there is giving it their all.

 

[elijahpep]

Hey KBKIDs! Yeah, what you're saying is the truth. My nephew has been on select baseball travel teams since he was 8 playing in older age group leagues. The cost was extensive and his parents did everything they could to make sure he could travel all over the US every summer with his team and allow him the opportunity to excel to the best of his ability. Select teams are crucial to some kids at any age and any sport. The day he found out he got a full ride to a great university, our whole family was thrilled for him.
He loves the sport and has been dedicated completely to that sport and now he will get a great education with all his dilligence and practice.

Practice is required and YES some kids are very serious to practice hard and play hard because they see early on it will take them places beyond their wildest dreams.

Goofing during practice is unaccepatable and hurts the TEAM as a whole!

~DW

 

[koopa]

Or doing bad in a competition might serve as a wake up call for the cheerleaders and parents who are goofing off.

 

[Chattyaholic]

I may be in the minority on this, but I just don't understand why people push their little ones to be involved in things like that. Competitive cheerleading at 7 years old?! Wow. Why can't kids just be kids? I think parents push their kids to grow up too fast. Stuff like competitive cheerleading should be left for junior and senior high IMHO.

Maybe the little girls who are acting out really don't want to be there. Maybe they'd rather be home playing with their Barbie dolls, or coloring or drawing, or riding their bikes with their friends...

 

[kbkids]

I may be in the minority on this, but I just don't understand why people push their little ones to be involved in things like that. Competitive cheerleading at 7 years old?! Wow. Why can't kids just be kids? I think parents push their kids to grow up too fast. Stuff like competitive cheerleading should be left for junior and senior high IMHO.

Maybe the little girls who are acting out really don't want to be there. Maybe they'd rather be home playing with their Barbie dolls, or coloring or drawing, or riding their bikes with their friends...

I agree with some of what you're saying. If the kids don't want to be there, they shouldn't be. But, on the other hand, there are kids who are that driven. My DD lives for cheerleading. She loves it!! I give her the choice each year on whether to continue, and she's never hesitated to say yes. If the day comes that she doesn't want to do it, that's fine. Competitive teams aren't for everyone. If the child isn't really devoted to it, they shouldn't be there. It's not good for them, and it's not good for the team.

 

[Mom21]

I may be in the minority on this, but I just don't understand why people push their little ones to be involved in things like that. Competitive cheerleading at 7 years old?! Wow. Why can't kids just be kids? I think parents push their kids to grow up too fast. Stuff like competitive cheerleading should be left for junior and senior high IMHO.

Maybe the little girls who are acting out really don't want to be there. Maybe they'd rather be home playing with their Barbie dolls, or coloring or drawing, or riding their bikes with their friends...

I usually stay out of things like this, but this time feel the need to reply. My dd is 9 and has been a competitive cheerleader for 2 years. She started out in gymnastics at 2 just for something fun as a mommy and me. She progressed until she was on a gymnastics team, but honestly she really wasn't very good and had a hard time, but she loved it. I pulled her out and found a cheer gym where she took tumbling classes. That way she could still do what she loved...tumbling. They convinced her to try out for the cheer team, which surprised me as she has never loved dance (taken it several times over the years).

Well she loved it and it now is her life. To tell her she couldn't do it would really devastate her. She cheers in her sleep. She brushes her teeth to an 8 count.....LOL. She even dreams about it. And honestly, if you wait until jr high to start competitive cheer you have a low chance of making it unless you have natural talent. My dd isn't even very good. She is average on the team....doesn't matter to her.

To insinuate that all children that compete at a young age are pushed by their parents, does a dis-service to all of those cheerleaders that want it so bad. I even ask my dd to take next year off.....nope. I really hate using all of my time and money to go to the competitions and spending so many hours at the gym is exhausting for me. I wish I had found something I loved so much as a child that would be my passion. My dd insists she is going to be a teacher and a cheer coach after school. She has a drive, a passion, and a love that I can't see diminishing anytime soon. But if it does, rest assured, I would never push her to continue.

 

[luvflorida]

Maybe the little girls who are acting out really don't want to be there. Maybe they'd rather be home playing with their Barbie dolls, or coloring or drawing, or riding their bikes with their friends...

Again, this is something the coach should be addressing. Taking things to a competitive level is different than taking a weekly class for fun. Some of these kids may be in over their head, or truly aren't interested in the activity. The sad part is the parents not recognizing it first.

 

[robinb]

Well she loved it and it now is her life. To tell her she couldn't do it would really devastate her. She cheers in her sleep. She brushes her teeth to an 8 count.....LOL. She even dreams about it. And honestly, if you wait until jr high to start competitive cheer you have a low chance of making it unless you have natural talent. My dd isn't even very good. She is average on the team....doesn't matter to her.

First of all, I am glad that your DD enjoys the team. So does my DD who has been on swim team for 2 1/2 years, ever since she was barely 5. Swimming, like all competitive sports, is also very expensive. I think we end up paying close to $1000 per year for Fall, Winter and Summer team.

I think that Chattyaholic's point was the competitive edge of the parents. I have to think that the kids are really there to just have fun. The OP was "venting" about kids that were not acting up to her standards. You say that your child is average. Whose to say that some parent isn't "venting" about your kid and her abilities on some other website. How your average kid is bringing the team down? How would that make you feel?

 

[koopa]

I may be in the minority on this, but I just don't understand why people push their little ones to be involved in things like that. Competitive cheerleading at 7 years old?! Wow. Why can't kids just be kids? I think parents push their kids to grow up too fast. Stuff like competitive cheerleading should be left for junior and senior high IMHO.

Maybe the little girls who are acting out really don't want to be there. Maybe they'd rather be home playing with their Barbie dolls, or coloring or drawing, or riding their bikes with their friends...

My take on competitive cheerleading as well as other select teams like basketball or soccer is that the kids have access to better coaching than playing recreationally. I think it's a great outlet for the kid who is serious about their sport.

My 8 year daughter wanted to play soccer at a competive level after watching a few local teams play. The coach was upfront about the practice and game schedules, so we decided to try out. She didn't make the team she tried out for, but she got placed on another team and is having a great time this year.

Another reason she wanted to play is to get a chance to win a trophy. Recreational soccer doesn't have any tournaments or awards for the league winners. Select soccer offers her that opportunity.

 

[kbkids]

First of all, I am glad that your DD enjoys the team. So does my DD who has been on swim team for 2 1/2 years, ever since she was barely 5. Swimming, like all competitive sports, is also very expensive. I think we end up paying close to $1000 per year for Fall, Winter and Summer team.

I think that Chattyaholic's point was the competitive edge of the parents. I have to think that the kids are really there to just have fun. The OP was "venting" about kids that were not acting up to her standards. You say that your child is average. Whose to say that some parent isn't "venting" about your kid and her abilities on some other website. How your average kid is bringing the team down? How would that make you feel?

But the OP didn't say that the child in question was "average" or "not any good". She's aggravated that she's acting up and not doing what she should. This will bring the team down as a whole. I really don't care if a child is GREAT, but they need to give it their best, and they aren't doing that by playing around during practice. My DD does an absolutely beautiful split, but she can't land her back handspring to save her life. And that's okay - her coach knows that and doesn't put her in that position. That doesn't stop her from getting out there and working hard at it though. If I was spending the money I am only to have my child get out there and goof off, I'd pull her off the team myself.

 

[robinb]

If I was spending the money I am only to have my child get out there and goof off, I'd pull her off the team myself.

But you don't know if that child will "goof off" when it comes to competitions or if she will pull it together. My DD does goof off during practice and it does bug me. So ... I don't watch her practice. Her coach doesn't seem to mind. He teaches her the skills while allowing her to have fun. He thinks that having fun is what the 8-under kids need the most to set the foundation for the more demanding swimming as an older child.