From Working Mom to SAHM- how to make it happen?

[Rence]

I had a very good friend who decided to do the SAHM thing a few years back. It didn't really work out as she expected. She loves her kids and all that, but within a few months she was going stark raving mad. They lived in a rural subdivision and she had no SAHM friends - so all day, every day she was with two little kids. Hubby worked longer hours to make it all happen so when he got home he was ready for bed. As much as she loved the time with her kids, she missed adult conversation, interaction etc.

What she ended up doing was taking a part-time job that was much more family friendly. Lots less stress and the job was a lot more fun. Money not as good, but it got her out of the house. She had to work every morning, so the kids went to half-day pre-school, which they enjoyed as it gave them interaction with other children. This really worked for her. A fun, get out of the house job that gave her adult interaction, but also plenty of time for her kids.

 

[C&G'sMama]

To OP. I'm the other half of "koolaidmoms". You've gotten some great advice here. There is no one-size-fits-all way to do it. As DP mentioned I am the main financial support. I feel her staying at home has enabled me to advance in my career as she is around to take care of "stuff". But she also works part time for someone she's worked for for years. It's for a small CPA and she does stuff during tax season and a little bit off season. It's not about the money but about getting to do other stuff. But as the kids have gotten older she has also gotten more involved in volunteer stuff such as being on the Board of Directors of the Regional PTA, she volunteers in the children's classroom and has been tapped to be part of some of the decision making as a parent representative at our children's school.

I know my limitations and while I love my kids to death I would make a lousy SAHM. I do not have the patience or the discipline. Each child started in some kind of pre-school when they were 2 (it was 1 day a week) At 3 they went 3 days a week and at 4 they each went to Pre-K. We are fortunate to have a very good free pre-K program in our district.

Bottom line is what works for your family.

Good luck in whatever you decide to do.

 

[C.Ann]

Also, could you do something part-time or as a job share?? Perhaps not with your current company but with another company or organization? You might take a pay cut, but not a total pay loss. So then instead of losing 45% of your family's total income, maybe you'd only lose 20% or 25%. This also keeps your hand in the working world in case something happens, God forbid, but frees up more time to spend with your child. Could be the best of both worlds, if you KWIM. In thie current economic climate, I'm not sure I'd remove myself completely from the working world, just in case...

Living off one income for a while would be a good test.

Also, how is DH's job stability?

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This is the first thing that came to my mind as well.. The DH might be much more receptive to this..