I like that chapter title, just in case you haven't gotten enough of the Geico commercial.
Monday moring arrived with a quiet acceptance on our part.
We mostly moved around the room in silence as we finished packing.
I checked the doorhandle and for the fourth time this trip an eviction notice is hanging there.
Man, they can't make up their minds;
Give us a room, kick us out, give us a room, kick us out, wash, rinse, repeat.
They must be talking to the neighbors.
The night before, we had noticed one of those weird collapsing dolly/luggage carts near the stairwell. It looked abandoned but I didn't want to take it because usually you have to give your driver's license to get it from luggage and whoever got it might be in trouble then.
But now, the next morning I have no qualms. I grabbed it and pushed it down to the elevator.
I was glad it was already in the "4 wheel roll" position, saves me some time. These things look like they from the Spanish Inquisition, not sure how but they have to be able to inflict pain somehow.
I had wanted to be out of Music by ten, it's twenty to now, looking good.
With the last piece loaded, as usual I have to stand next to the door for a moment and look around. Normally we leave when it's early and still dark and we're still sleepy, it's much easier that way.
As we rounded the corner and went past the main parking lot the sun was shining brightly, people were in all the bus stop lines to go spend the day at Epcot, or Animal Kingdom,,,,,, or anywhere, just NOT Carpentersville, Illinois.
As ridiculous as this seems, it's kind of hard to accept that life will continue to go on at DisneyWorld, without us.
To snap out of it I have to tell myself, "Maybe we will go on the December trip!"
After we left Music I went a bit out of the way to go and fill up at Hess, the gas is still so much cheaper there than anywhere I've found in the state of Florida, done filling, I headed for the Western Way. A few miles down the road, there's the big sign with Mickey, "Come back soon!", besides me a quiet voice says, "bye Disney," and now I'm starting to tear up again. Geesh, what's wrong with me?
Everything went smooth, I just followed the Turnpike right into I-75.
This was not as simple as it should be a few trips ago.
Coming back from our first February trip, we left early in the morning and it didn't get light out until later.
Smidgy was sleeping, I was trying not to.
And I got very comfortable following this huge semi, I liked his taillights and his speed.
Oh I followed him allright, followed him right off the Turnpike up a very wide ramp that seemed like the highway.
And I had no idea where we were.
Driving around I couldn't find how to get back on the Turnpke, finally realizing the problem when I saw signs that said 75. It was right at the junction that I pulled off, could not have picked a worse spot.
This time, all went smooth till Atlanta, where we decided to try the bypass around it. It went smooth too until we joined back up with 75, then we hit a jammup.
And Jellytight.
sorry
Finally we got going good again, and we still had no idea how far we were going to go or where we were staying tonight. The one thing we agreed on was we were NOT going to stay at the Safari Inn in Murfreesboro, TN.
I was noticing one thing though, my eyes were really tired.
No, not sleepy tired, helping me to see good, tired.
I've always said it seems like I only get so many good "looks" in a day, then things start to blur up but it's happening more quickly today.
Probably because the late night, lot's of eye strain at MK and all the time spent in the sun the last two weeks.
But I'm ok for now in the daylight. It was about six, still got two and a half hours of light left, no problem.
5 minutes later it got dark out.
I think the storm clouds came out of the truck in front of me. 20 minutes ago Diane reminded me that the Weather Channel said there'd be storms in northern Georgia and I scoffed at her.
Scoff, scoff!
Well she, they, were correctimundo.
Ok, I can deal with the dark clouds, so far no rain anyway.
It started raining.
Diane grabbed the motel coupon books and started looking. I told her to shoot for Dalton, about 30 miles down the road.
Or is it up the road?
Smidgy asked if I wanted to try for a closer town but I said no, this light rain is really no problem, we can make Dalton so she called a motel and booked a room for us.
Then it started pouring.
Buckets, wave pool force, blowing sideways, everyways, bouncing back up from the ground.
I heard a voice giving Noah instuctions.
I had never, ever driven in such a cloudburst in my life.
If you measured visibility from the front of the hood of the car, mine was able to reach as far as the grill.
And now it becomes frighteningly obvious how much my crappy eyes had deteriorated today, driving.
I was not seeing in High Definition.
This was not a high def plasma or LCD screen that was being shown to me.
Oh no, now I've got the graphics of an Atari 2600!
I'm back in time with an old black and white tv with fuzzy reception that you have to keep fiddling with the rabbit ears to get a clear picture.
It's 3 lanes wide on this stretch, and most cars are still going faster than I want to go. I got behind a semi in the right lane.
Then it got worse.
I didn't think it possible could, but it did.
Nobody was passing me now, and most people turned on their emergency flashers. I tried to just keep the tail lights of the semi in front of me in sight, but I couldn't even get close enough to do that.
Put the defroggers on high, that helped a little, but I wasn't as in touch with the flashers button to find it without taking my eyes off the road and that wasn't going to happen for even a split second.
If my whole scrotum hadn't moved up inside my throat I probably would have wet the seat, it was so bad.
Many trucks and many cars had pulled over onto the shoulder, I would have too if I could have done it with peace of mind that I"m not going to slam into somebody else that had already pulled over. I was hoping the semi in front of me would pull over, then I could just follow behind him but no, I've got to get behind the Energizer Bunny.
Then I lost the semi, just couldn't safely keep up and I was on my own.
This was not good.
It was like somebody was in the back seat and reachd forward and put their hands over my eyes and said, "Guess who?"
5 miles to our exit.
We limped along down the highway, the rain was not abating, going about 35 miles an hour now and blind as a bat.
Suddenly, from out of nowhere, right smack dab in front of us are two headlights not turned on and a big grill, coming right at us.
Smidgy gasped, I almost yanked the wheel to the right to avoid the full head on collision, but stopped.
This big SUV was too high.
Remarkably, I had caught up to a car carrier semi, the one in the back was loaded in backwards, facing us.
Diane's fingerprints are still in the dashboard.
Our exit finally arrived, we limped off the highway, the motel was right there on the left, I pulled the Santa Fe in, parked in front of the lobby, ,,,,
and the rain slowed to a drizzle.
The room was ok, we had the last of the baloney we had brought down with us and snacks and the next morning we were on our way again.
This drive was clear all the way home, and I decided to go for it. We originally were going to take an extra day in getting home, that's why we didn't leave early, but after doing the math in my head, I thought we could get through Chicago after most of the rush hour is over, but before it gets dark out.
Once we hit Illinois, and rt. 57 you get this stupid feeling that you're almost home.
Then you pass the sign that says, "Chicago 348 miles."
That'll slap the smirk off your face! And we've got another 40 miles after that!
It sure gave me plenty of time though to reflect on the trip.
Man, in one way it seemed like it was just yesterday that I was on this road and had to turn around to go back for the forgotten bathroom bag. But in another way it felt like it happened 4 months ago.
Other things about this trip were really strange.
For the first time ever, out of 17 Disney trips, we did not do "It's a Small World."
We also didn't see Beauty and the Beast at the Studios which has become a staple the last 8 trips or so.
And we never even went once to Animal Kingdom.
No Lion King, no Everest, and no Finding Nemo!
I also never did Space Mountain, Rock'n Roller Coaster or Tower of Terror.
There was no Spectro, and no Wishes.
No Le Cellier and no Flame Tree Barbecue.
Yep, somehow, someway, gotta find a way to get back when it's normal again, for the holidays, with the dining plan.
Through Chicago, we are now heading northwest, towards Wisconsin.
I can tell we are getting closer to Wisconsin because we could now smell the cheese when they cut it.
For those that don't know, Wisconsin is this territory north of Illinois and south of the Arctic Circle that everybody in the Chicago area go to vacation at because they have water.
This has always surprised me, since all the lakes in this territory reach a high temperature of 14 degrees.
But it still doesn't stop them from coming to vacation at some lakeside cabin.
The reason the population is so low in Wisconsin is because of this.
When the male gender sucks it up and goes swimming in one of the lakes he usually won't see his genitals for 3 days after that, by the time they return, it's time to take a bath again.
Wisconsin is also famous for their natural resources, water parks and go-kart tracks, but again, this home-grown fauna is only really appreciated for two weeks in July.
After or before that you must use a wet suit at the water parks and the go karts are all equipped with snow chains.
There's even been a rumor going around that Wisconsin may even become a state someday, but it'll never happen.
Especially since Canada turned them down.
We pulled into the driveway about 7:30, I was shot, Diane is now in efficiency mode, wanting to get things unloaded.
As she was opening the back hatch, I came up behind her, put my arms around her and hugged.
I only said one word.
One word spoken softly in her ear.
"
December"
And that's fahrenheit, not celcius!!! Never been in Florida in December, I know it's cooler than when we usually visit (September) but it better be much warmer than here!!! Plus as I said, we will be going to discovery cove to swim with dolphins so I don't want to freeze my tushie!!! I know it's not the ideal time to go to Discovery Cove but we are travelling with my mom this time and not only is it her first visit to Disney (she has been a Disney resister for years and finally agreed to come see for herself why DD and I are so obsessed with so she can judge for herself!) but it has been a lifelong dream of hers to swim with dolphins, i.e. the trip to Discovery Cove... So I know you will ask: Why not visit with her a time when it is warmer???
Well you see, dear mom lives in a tiny little village in the middle of knowhere up in the mountain where the first snowfall is in late September/Early October and the snow melts end of May sometimes early june....
ahhhh now that's the nebo report i am used to. sorry to say it but a trip report from you without the injury was a bit odd. I have few days off and hope to read the rest of your reports. the stroller story was well timed. we went to disneyland resort tues and wed this week. used our year to vol. ticket before it expired and still have some of those dvc points that i won so free roomand free ticket heck yeaj! anyway as we were in downtown disney last night the daughter was shopping at one of the many kiosks and this guy in his humveee strolleer plowed into lance. i also tried to pull him out of harms way but was just too late. he hit the hubby so hard his daughter fell out of the front of the stroller. it was a three seater and the oldest kid was not belted in
so i read lance your story and he totally understood your situation, he too just wanted to go back to the room. on the upside they had the holiday stuff up and lit up and we got to ride in the vip car on the train. always nice to do something new. 
christmas party from a local radio station. so hopefull since it is a 9 to 1 am party there won't be too many urban assault strollers after us
but maybe we will pack the soccer shin guards anyway
To be honest with you, I have never heard the term "hoser" but did a bit of research and here is the Wikipedia definition:
