Formal Apology to All

[Lynne M]

I don't have children, so my tolerance for shrieking/kicking is less than an experienced parent's would be. But I honestly don't know what any parent can do about a misbehaving 2-year old on an airplane.

You can't reason with a two year old. You can ask them to stop kicking, tell them to stop kicking, threaten them with loss of TV and toys for 6 months, and if the 2-year old is being obstinate, none of that is going to make a difference. What are your options at that point? Duct-taping the kid to the seat? Tying him up with one of those suitcase belts? Asking the flight attendant if they have a tranquilizer dart gun? (Not like I haven't fantasized about all of the above on some flights)

Even if you hold the kid and try to restrain him, that's just going to cause screaming if he's in a mood, and I'd rather have kicking than screaming.

When you fly to the most popular family destination on the planet, you kinda have to figure there's gonna be a toddler meltdown or two. Do I like it? Heck no. But if the parent is attempting to get the kid under control, what can I say? The only time I get angry over kicking is when it's an older kid who knows better than to do it, and the parents don't say one word to them about it.

 

[Thinktinknpixiedust]

That is our parenting style... we just ignore that kind of behaviour. However last summer our DD had a meltdown of extreme proportions at MGM, screaming as if she was being beaten to death. Well you just can't ignore that, so we attempted to put her in a "naughty" space (at home that would be a chair) just around the corner on a stoop out of the main line of foot traffic. Well that only made it look worse. After a few minutes I was ready to slap the next person that said "what are they doing to that poor little girl? why don't they pick her up? all she want's is a hug!". we left MGM and spent the rest of the day at our resort and all was wonderful. And when we got home I also posted my formal apologies for anyone that may have been there and had to endure that! I am happy that people take interest enough so that if I were killing my child they would stop it... however, there is a fine line. I suppose everyone's lines were being crossed.

i hear ya - what can you do. really, when they do that at such a young age. DD has just turned 2 and at home we can walk away from her (show no positive or negative reinforcement of the behavior) but when you are out like that, you can't walk away and ignore them. And goodness knows they just feed off of any attempts to calm them down...."oh, lookie - a nice birdy. HI Birdy. oh isn't he cute..." is only reciprocated by even more cries and body flailing.

no need to appologize, but the fact that you thought to shows that you are considerate of others experience, even if you can't make your daughter stop her melt down.

don't sweat it now that it is over with. i personally still feel bad about my DD (then 15 months old) screaming the entire flight back to Philly from WDW last october. i wanted to crawl under a seat and just pass out.

 

[NJOYURLIFE]

It is tough dealing with the meltdowns and bad behaviour. With 3 kids I have definately been there done that. And when you have more than one, it can sometimes seem like the meltdowns never stop. They don't have their meltdowns all at once and it always seems like you get one under control and then a different child causes a problem.

I can completely understand where you are coming from in how you handled her behaviour, but I couldn't help laughing at the fact that you commented a couple of times about what is fair to you and your spouse. Not trying to flame you here but ....Welcome to the world of parenting - where nothing is fair for the next 18 years.

We usually do alot of cooking when we go on vacation because we stay in villas and this is the main reason. It is actually less stressfull for us and for the other diners.

 

[Meezers]

I admit to not having read the whole thread. But I can remember my first trip to WDW. I was about 11-12 and it was the second year it opened. There was only MK.

I was old enough to understand everything and I still needed to get away from everything. Strange as it sounds...the whole family needed a dose of reality. I totally understand how it could be totally overwhelming for a 2 yoa.

PTSD patient who understands....if you see a overweight 44 year old running for the nearest exit...please understand that meltdowns aren't just for children any more...

 

[properlywarnedyebe]

Well, what began as something innocent and naive on my part, has turned into a CNN Political debate. Quite Entertaining actually. Thanks for all of your supportive words, and not so supportive words. I am proud to be selfish and think of my family first. We were desperate to find something our DD, DH, and myself would eat in the AC instead of sitting in the heat eating pretzels, and cheese plates for the hundreth time. We had a lot weirder and rude things happen to us during the trip than making a big deal about crying kids. For those of you who can't tolerate a crying kid in public in Disneyworld, I feel really sorry for you. That seems selfish to me.
And do you really think I voluntarily let her kick the seat on the plane? It annoyed us as well. First trip, first time parents, we all make mistakes. You live and learn.
I will leave you with this icing on the cake...
Our DD also likes to scream "Giant Balls!" in quiet crowded rooms.
I take full selfish credit for that.
Enjoy the Battle! I will sit in the bleachers...

 

[WDWRULZ]

Thanks for the apology, but I could not hear your DD over my 3 year old DD. I know it is the Happiest Place on Earth, but I have to laugh to keep my sanity when I see all of the crying children there and the parents arguing with the kids and themselves as a result. So don't sweat it, we ALL can relate

 

[__disneygirl]

It's very nice of you to apologize! When I see/hear a child causing commotion, I smile at the parent because I don't want them to feel like their child is bothering me. I understand that these things happen!

 

[HollisterSweetie]

I appreciate that you felt bad but your remark about never seeing them again clearly indicates you knew you were disturbing them but you made the choice to put your wants first. I believe that was selfish. There were other options for you to get sustenance or you could have done what you probably should have from the get go -- gone back to the hotel and let your daughter cool her heels until she could get back on track.

After spending her well earned money on this trip.... she has the right to stay where she so chooses without people like you making her feel bad for it. If a crying child bothers someone SO much that their whole day is ruined they should get some earplugs and go about their business.

 

[Lizzybee]

It happens to the best of us, my friend.

My son had a min melt-down leaving MK for the day when he was 2 1/2. The little bugger grabbed the post inside the ship on Peter Pan as we were getting out and hung on for dear life screaming, "We have to fly to Neverland! We have to fly to Neverland!" at the top of his lungs.

There is no doubt it was loud, but I'll bet it didn't sound as hideous to anyone else as it did to us.

Don't fret about it. You're in good company.

Ya know, I'm almost 36 and I can picture myself holding on to the post next to your son's and screaming "ME TOO ME TOO I WANNA FLY TO NEVERLAND!!!!"

Oh and just for the record I don't mind other people's kids misbehaving so much because then I look at my kids with a sense of pride. And if the kids are really naughty my kids try to tell me at least they are better than THAT. Then I have to remind them (and myself) yes but you guys are 12 and 8, not 2. I don't want any more 2 yr olds of my own, my kids are potty trained and respond well to threats they know I will back up. I can understand though just being overwhelmed by continuous tantrum to the point where you'd think "ok I can sit here and listen to this or I can go somewhere else and listen to it." I know I've done the best I could with my kids when they were having a tough time and it doesn't always work. I'm glad things were nicer after the first couple of days.

 

[properlywarnedyebe]

I can completely understand where you are coming from in how you handled her behaviour, but I couldn't help laughing at the fact that you commented a couple of times about what is fair to you and your spouse. Not trying to flame you here but ....Welcome to the world of parenting - where nothing is fair for the next 18 years.

Whom do people whisper behind their backs about more? A crying child having a meltdown or crying adults having a meltdown? Which is easier to tolerate and accept? If you guys think that I am selfish because we all needed to sit down and eat for a few minutes. So be it. Entitled to your opinion. The parents having a meltdown is a lot worse. I'm sure you never do anything for yourself, like eat, shower, shop, go to a movie, put the kids to bed early so you can read or get on the internet? Are the kids with you right now? Seems llike everything is fair on your end.

 

[Meezers]

Thinking about screaming on the Peter Pan ride myself.....maybe I can get taken away in one of those nice "hug yourself" jackets! Okay...I need a life....

 

[FINFAN]

Just want to say I have seen many an "adult" have a meltdown including the following lovely displays:
loud, swearing, fist in the air swinging, pop throwing, kid yanking, spit in your wife/husband/sig other's face yelling, just cut in front of others, eye rolling, name calling, cell-phone cussing ( yes, others CAN hear you even tho you think only the reciever can) money complaining, CM bashing ( mostly at restaurants), blowing toxic smoke in non-allowed areas, line cutting, vulgar derogatory opposite sex commenting, seat kicking ( yes, adults kick seats too) crazy driving, parking space stealing, and my personal pet peeve...TALKING THRU THE ATTRACTION LOUDLY/ ANNOUNCING WHAT COMES NEXT!
Just a wee bit of temper tantrum rude behavior, and they are not 2, and SADLY I have looked to see that there are in fact other adults in the group/party...who do not try and stop these meltdowns...no one steps the offender to the side, tells them they are acting inappropriately, apologizes for their behavior, asks them to leave the restaurant...sheese....I accept the OP's good intentions of her sincere apology and hope that she will be understanding in whatever circumstances she finds herself in with others of all ages and their meltdowns.
Even the anomatronics have melt-down/ break downs and disappoint....don't sweat the small stuff if you can.


Pam

 

[Biscuitsmom31]

I don't think you did a thing wrong. Caving in to your child's demands only reinforces the behavior. Once she learns that she doesn't get her way by screaming, she will stop. I for one am more annoyed when I see parents caving in to their children than I am when I have to listen to a fit. There are kids at Disney. Kids have fits. If this bothers you, feel free to take your own food outside and eat. Get off the self righteous soap box.

 

[belle2594]

Kids will be kids what bothers me is adults. On our last trip going into the magic kingdom (it was a wall of people) my dd who was 9 at the time bumped into a man and he sweared at her and pushed her down. That was a wonderful Disney moment. Needless to say my husband came unglued Fortunately the man took off quick!!!

I find adults who go into places expecting everything to be perfect for them and have no compassion for others are the rude ones. Maybe instead of worrying about your ruined dinner you should show some compassion to the family not having a very good day.

 

[LoriMistress]

Kids are not suppose to be complete angels. You're forgiven...for now. J/K

 

[blestmom]

There are so many things in this world that are big things. Kids acting up aren't a big thing. Deal with it. I have 5 kids of my own, and kids who are 'out of sorts' don't bother me in the least. Put the screaming, kicking kid in the seat behind me. Won't bother me at all. I haven't met any 'self-centered' parents who won't take their crying child out of restaurant, rather I see them as tired and worn-out, and I try to smile and be understanding. Even though my kids are older now (8-16) I remember those days of tantrums, etc., and really appreciated a kind smile when my kids acted up. So I try to do the same. And I remember to be thankful for the blessings in my life and like another poster said...not sweat the small stuff.

 

[Allensfan]

I never said that the blind or people in wheel chairs can't go...and I NEVER said Your child should not be in Disney. My point was that sometimes as parents, myself included, we want to go so badly that we don't consider that maybe waiting a few years would provide our kids some extra enjoyment and memories. And a more relaxing trip for the parents. Since my dh will be having chemo during our trip, and in a wheel chair...if we even get to go at all...I assure you, I am very flexible and if your screaming kid was sitting next to us, I would reach out to lean a helping hand when ever I could.

 

[cleo]

Meltdowns are such a tough thing. I've been thinking about this thread (shaking my head at some of the comments and smiling at others ) and what I would do my child had a meltdown now. Since my boy is 13 it's not really an issue any more, but I keep coming back to the thought that there really is very little you can do, short of removing them from the scene somehow and letting them pitch a fit until they're done. Maybe we should all take a magazine along so we could read while our kid flails all over the ground.

It's a tough one. Until you've been there it's pretty hard to understand what it's like for the parents. Ya can't hit the kid, ya can't yell at them, and now you can't ignore them.....what the heck has society left for us to do?

For those of you who said you can't stand hearing our kid's melt-down, a little compassion would go a long way and you might even end up feeling like YOUR day wasn't 'ruined' if you give those parents an understanding smile. They hate it more than you do, I guarantee.

 

[Mickey1122]

The only people who could be upset at you are adults who don't have kids.

 

[Mickey1122]

I never said that the blind or people in wheel chairs can't go...and I NEVER said Your child should not be in Disney. My point was that sometimes as parents, myself included, we want to go so badly that we don't consider that maybe waiting a few years would provide our kids some extra enjoyment and memories. And a more relaxing trip for the parents. Since my dh will be having chemo during our trip, and in a wheel chair...if we even get to go at all...I assure you, I am very flexible and if your screaming kid was sitting next to us, I would reach out to lean a helping hand when ever I could.

I haven't read throught the thread, but don't little kids get the most out of Disney Vacations?