For those who are overweight(fluffy)

[sunlver]

Does your weight/size keep you from doing things? For example, would you know wear a certain item because of your size? Would you not try a new activity because of your size/weight?

I know for myself(Iam about 35 pds overweight),and Im just big all over(big legs, arms, butt etc..). I hate wearing shorts in the summer. I do it because it gets to be 95 degrees some days. I hate the way I look in shorts, (yes Im going to WW now and exercise 6 days a week). I have to shorts that come down low past mid thigh. I normally buy mens shorts, you know the work out type. Although Im sure I look bigger then I am, they are roomy and come down low. I also do not wear tank tops in the summer. My upper arms are so big and flabby and no way do I want to show that off. I will wear a swimsuit, but not in front of other adults. We have an above ground pool in the yard. I will go in with the kids, but not if other adults are here(except my husband).
I do not wear anything tight, always have my shirts/tshirts roomy.

Sometimes I do not like to go to certain places that I have to dress up for. I just feel so fat and frumpy. If I cant wear my roomy tshirts and shorts then I wont go.

So how does your weight/size effect what you do and dont do? Or maybe it doesnt and Im just the only crazy one

 

[LittleRydia]

For one, your not alone in this. there are tons of woman out there skinny or overweight that feel the same. Its a normal thing for a woman to belive she wont look good in somethings.

Now ill say my weight here and size, which is 235 lbs, im 5'5 and wear normally a 18-20 size jeans. Now few months ago... you wouldnt of been able to pay me to tell someone these things. I have my current boyfriend, and who i plan to marry one day to thank for making me like who i am and what i look like.

I also have the large arms, theighs and hips. I dont have a problem with my stomach, but it does hang down a bit but im more wide then round. Before this year I wouldnt wear shorts, tank tops and always went swimming with a shirt over my bathing suit. I have lost some weight (about 15 pounds in the past few months) But no matter how much I try I cant really lose a lot of weight. So I have come to the fact to except what I look like.

Really you shouldnt worry how you would look in a tanktop, or in shorts. So what if other people are seeing you? I still wear my baggy shirts etc but latly I have gotten some tanktops and tighter shirts and be honest they dont look as bad as I thought they would on me.

I suggest, you go out and buy some kind of tanktops, maybe some kind of nightwear that you would never thought of buying. When or if your ever home alone just walk around the house wearing it. Stop and pose in the mirror once in a while. Just remeber no matter what your size, your beautiful and no one can make you think otherwise.

 

[kellyg403]

I am the same...it is very difficult for me in the summer because I feel like everyone can see all the flab everywhere! I have thigh-midsection issues but have started to notice around my upper arms as well.

The flipside of this is that I have noticed that alot of people seem to be more comfortable with their bodies overall than I have EVER been...I could always find the flaws! My teenagers say ewwwww...but I have come to see as I age that this people are probably more healthy and have a clearer picture of their bodies than I did. I don't know how these kids do it with the belly shirts and short shorts.

I get overall disgusted and refuse to go shopping unless I have to. Basically I will not go into a fitting room anymore because I am embarrased and I think those mirrors HAVE to add on at least 15 lbs...or so I hope! I am starting to diet but it is slow going. I am 42, had 7 babies and age is definitely not helping. I am 5'2 and approximately 160 lbs. and climbing! I have found that I am more successful on this sugar free diet than I have ever been on anything else.

Kelly

 

[arminnie]

Just remeber no matter what your size, your beautiful and no one can make you think otherwise.

I never looked like the rail thin young girls and had image problems for years - even when I wasn't really overweight.

The beauty of being old now is that no one expects me to look like I am 15. And the big secret to life is that no one really cares what you look like as they are all too worried about what they look like.

I used to get way more dates than my skinny friends as I had a nice smile and was more outgoing. Inner beauty will trump outer beauty with anyone worth knowing.

I have a good friend who is in her late 50s and whose weight fluctuates between 250-300 pounds. Men just flock to her.

 

[DisneyGirl4188]

I'm the same way. I don't wear sleeveless shirts or shorts. I did buy a few pairs of shorts (long), but I rarely wear them.

I live for fall and winter, so I can wear my jeans and sweatshirts.

 

[binny]

Just remember:

Those who mind dont matter and those who matter dont mind


all of us are a little self conscience it goes with the territory I think.

true happiness comes when we learn to accept who we are.

Striving to be a healthy weight ( and that is not usually stick thin) is the grand goal for me. I know I will never be a size 6 again. Im ok with that. Im not built that way ( thanks to the Northern stock of my ancestors LOL we HAVE to store fat for those cold winter nights dont ya know ) BUT I can be healthy. If I reach that goal what I look like doesnt matter to me.


Besides, honestly people dont think about nearly as much as you think they do.

 

[CathrynRose]

Just remember:

Those who mind dont matter and those who matter dont mind


.

Exaaaaaactly!!!

Ive been fat, skinny and everywhere in between, and the fact of the matter is - Im always the same *me*!!!

I totally understand what youre saying - I really do, (I personally believe the only 'allowed' discrimination anymore is Fat Discrimination) Dont let it stop you from enjoying LIFE! Dont look back and regret things... Life is much too short.



I have a saying I use - but it'll get me kicked off the DIS. It involves a 2 word saying, with a 4 letter word and the 2nd part of it is " 'em "

 

[Fannie_Marie]

I too am a big girl 5'4" and currently 175 lbs. I have topped over 220 lbs and been as low as 145 lbs - never have I let my weight stop me from doing anything. My motto is: "If they make it my size, then I'm wearing it!" I've never had any problems finding dates - there are plenty of chubby chasers out there! Life is too short to worry about what other people think. I want to live life to the fullest - fat or thin.

 

[DMickey28]

I could have written this post. I just moved to S. Florida and my size is slapping me in the face. Not so much because of the beach bodies around but because it's so dang hot and humid that not wearing shorts and tank tops seems to be almost not an option. I haven't worn shorts in two years until I got here. I found some comfy ones that I *think* look ok and I wear those.

DH made me buy some nice clothes that fit because I was wearing the same few capris and button down shirts for a long time. Now that I have dressier clothes, in a size that fights, I feel better about myself. That in turn has made me care more about my health and getting healthier and then in turn losing weight. I belong to WW online but I don't do it. I started South Beach this week and am down 4 lbs so far, but it's not a long term way of eating for me. I am going to start WW meetings next week, also as a way of meeting people!

I am currently 27, 28 next week!, 5'6" and 181.5 as of this AM. I was 160 when I got married just under two years ago and 150 when I met DH four years ago. I am in a size 14 pant now, don't do jeans b/c they don't stretch. My weight is in my stomach a bit and a little in my upper arms (that's more a lack of toning) and mostly in my butt and thighs. 14's are huge on my waist and tight on my thighs. I would like to get down to 150 eventually and 160 by Christmas. I would like to fit into my 10's comfortable and maybe get to the 8's sometime. I want to be healthy and comfortable in my skin.

My relationship with DH suffers due to my self image. I have started to find myself getting tired when we are "intimate" and that can't be good... We want to start a family, we were actually TTC this Spring but had one early M/C and then this move came up. Now I am committed to losing weight first and getting as healthy as I can to carry a new life.

 

[Buckalew11]

I think some of the attitudes here are good ones.

I just don't have one of those attitudes about my weight. It ruins a lot of things for me. I am not sure why I am so hard on myself. I've been doing WW since May and am 4 lbs within goal but I rarely wear shorts, never sleeveless shirts, sundresses etc. I don't even own a bathing suit this summer.

Not only do I let my weight dictate what I will wear, I also let it stop me from doing many fun things in life. I am far from anorexic but know that at an 8-10, many people would love to have my "problem". And so the bad feelings continue...

 

[pearlieq]

I absolutely, 100% refuse to be cowed by what I imagine people might be thinking of me.

I am large. I wear shorts. I wear tank tops. I wear cute dresses. I wear a swimsuit.

It took me a little while to get there. It wasn't until I was 18 that I finally realized that it was my body and my life and that I wasn't going to live it with some ridiculous "shame" about how I looked. This is who I am. If someone has a problem with it, they can go sit & spin!

I feel very sorry for women who won't wear normal clothes or go about normal activies. I wish they had more confidence and more outrage at the idea that society tries to deem one type of body "acceptable".

I'm happily married, have a great job, and wonderful friends. My life is not worthless just because I shop at Lane Bryant, and I refuse to spend it hiding and hating myself!

 

[NAB]

Your not crazy. I too will not wear a bathing suit in public. I am always thinking people are looking at me when I am eating out like I shouldn't be there. I alway try to get a good sense how big I am. I ask my husband all the time. He loves me at any size and I have been many. It is true if you feel good about yourself it doesn't matter what size you are because like someone else said. You will always be you on the inside even if you are a size 0 or size 26.

 

[Crankyshank]

I have a horrible self image. My self image was in the toliet even when I was thin because my Mother used to make fun of me and call me fatty.

I am a big believer in just because something fits, it doesn't mean you should wear it. I try hard to flatter my body as much as possible. I might feel more comfy in oversized clothes but I look even bigger in them, so I don't wear them because it would just make me feel worse about myself. I wear shorts all of the time at home and on the weekends (I can't at work) and it doesn't faze me. I will not wear a tank top or any sort of sleeveless top. Not just because I hate my arms but because it just is not flattering.

Activities are something I'm a bit more self conscious about. I don't like going to the beach, to water parks, to gym unless DH is with me, and other sorts of physical activities because I am uncomfortable with the looks I get. People go out of there way to not sit near fat people. It's like they think fat is contagious or something.

 

[Chicago526]

About the only thing I won't wear at my current weight is a bikini. I'd need to lose about 10-15 more pounds, which I'm working on at the moment. I'm 5'7" and 160, my ideal weight (I beleive) is 145, but I'm happy at 150 too. Actually according to my doctor I should be 130 or something stupid like that but at that weight you'd be able to see my ribs and wonder why I'm not in the hospital for an eating disorder. I wish they'd come up with better height/weight charts. Oh, and I hate tank tops, I think my arms are fat no matter what weight I am (145 or 160, they just always look flaby). I still wear them when it's hot, but I always feel like people are staring at me, wondering if I flap my arms if I'll get airborne!

I don't like shorts, but it has nothing to do with weight. They just bunch up in all the wrong places and I just never feel comfortable in them. So I don't wear them, even though my legs look fine (even at my heavier weight).

An old friend of mine is very over weight (5'10" and 320 pounds) and it does restrict what she does. She refuses to go to amusment parks because she's affraid she won't fit on the rides (and that did happen one time, and she's refused to go back ever since). She's never said anything but now that I think about it, I haven't seen her in shorts in ages, so maybe she won't wear those, either.

 

[kelleigh1]

I have always been on the larger size, although I apparently carry it well because nobody believes that I weigh a little over 200 lbs.

There are things I don't wear, but only because these are things that really don't look good on my shape or size. Not every style of clothing looks good on every style of body. I wear those that look good on me.

Personally, I don't feel that big baggy clothing looks good on me. I do wear more fitted styles that look good on my shape.

I can't say that I always felt that I looked good either. But between counseling and meeting my husband, I've learned to accept who I am and to dress so that I look better and feel even better about myself. Also, several years ago there was a plus size magazine that I subscribed too, and those women were beautiful. There were some smaller than me and some bigger than me and they all dressed to accentuate their bodies in a way that made them look fantastic. That magazine is no longer in print, but there is another that is available at Lane Bryant and a few other plus size stores called Figure.

When I got engaged back in 2003, I promised myself that I'd have an open mind about trying on wedding dresses. I've seen so many plus size brides that insisted on long sleeved gowns and heavy layers to try to hide their size. It didn't hide anything but actually made them look bigger. I didn't want that. I tried on all styles of dresses...including a mermaid style that absolutely floored me. I was thinking "sausage" but honestly, it looked amazing. I didn't get that dress though...because the beading was too high on the sides and irritated my arms - which I imagine would also happen to a "skinny" bridge.

But the wedding dress I did wear...strapless. Let me find you a picture. I love showing off my wedding pictures. (And yet I always hated having my picture taken.)

Ok, here's my Supermodel picture. (No, I didn't pose for this.) And for the record, my dress was actually a size 22.

 

[BedKnobbery2]

I'm more than "fluffy"--I'm downright FAT. And, I love my body. I know I'm unusual in that--for a woman in general, not just a fat woman.

I'm over 6 feet tall and weigh around 300 lbs. I've also got great numbers for my cholesterol, blood pressure, and glucose levels (get tested every year). I always feel compelled to mention that when weight enters the conversation because most people immediately assume if you are fat, you are also unhealthy. I'm fat, healthy, and active. I walk 1-2 miles almost every day.

I even wear a bikini. I find them more comfortable than a one piece, and I get a better than than in a tankini. If it bothers anyone, that's their problem, not mine.

Last year I went kayaking for the first time, which was soooo much fun. I do avoid certain activities, but only if they increase my chances to break a limb (I've broken all of them but my right leg, and I want to keep it that way! So no skiing or rollerblading for me!)

Being fat doesn't mean you have to hide in tent-like clothes and sit in the shade. Wear what you want and popular opinion be damned!

 

[MinnyGranny62]

My DH says that I look good....so I guess that it doesn't matter.
He must not have noticed that I put on more than 50lbs since we were married. I am self consious though especially in the summer.

 

[helenabear]

Just remeber no matter what your size, your beautiful and no one can make you think otherwise.

I think this really needs to be repeated!

I've been all over the place with the weight, and when I was 190 at 5', I know I could've written your post. I hated going out, I hated buying any clothes.

Sadly I know I looked even more frumpy than I really was since I was trying to "hide" behind my clothes.

Even when skinny, I still hate wearing shorts and skirts. I have to be talked into some of my clothing.

I am so envious of people like BedKnobbery2. I would love to be that comfortable in my skin. The good thing is people like that also rub off on me in a good way.

Easier said than done, but don't like your size get you down! Try to find love for yourself and say "hang it all" to those who look at you negatively for what you wear... because truthfully as long as you are wearing clothes that fit (size wise) you can wear whatever you want! I really love anyone who feels so comfortable in their skin that they wear anything and everything.

In the mean time for me, I still will have to get over the scary thought of wearing sleeveless and my bikini. I own both, and I am trying to wear them to make me feel okay. It's a slow process but it seems to be working.

Rambles I know, but enjoy your body and try not to fear. As long as *you* are happy, that's all that matters!

 

[pearlieq]

I love showing off my wedding pictures.

Hot damm! That dress is GORGEOUS!!!

 

[lovemygoofy]

I've never been "little" and never will be. You can see in my picture that I'm overweight. Somedays I'm realy thrilled with anything I put on(especially that one week a month ) but I do wear shorts and tank tops and halter tops and anything else I wear. It has taken me some time to find things that flatter in certain ways and cover up other areas. I watched alot of those what not to wear shows and went in for a professional fitting when I was in college. It honestly helps when you wear things that flatter your body and are the right color. More than anything it helps to have someone that loves you no matter what. That handsome man in my picture loves me no matter what. I could be a 2 or 22 and he and I have learned the hard way that life is short and if people are going to talk about what I"m wearing they are going to be talking about how good I look! If you ever want to talk please feel free to PM. I absoultely understand what you are talking about.