who is in control of this situation?
The OP is. Or, at least, I am, on my vacations. Things may happen around me that are out of my control, but I am in control as to how I deal w them.
they want there to be this unsatisfied frenzy over these characters for some reason
Huh? How dare them for creating a product that everyone wants. And how dare Nintendo make the Wii which was sold out for a year despite my kids wanting one. And how dare Subway experience a tomato shortage the day I wanted a Subway Club. And how dare Target run a Black Friday ad that I couldn't walk in and just pick up... People waited out since the night before and I lost out? Even most of the people who waited in line lost out cuz they came up short on the item which they disclaim might be in short supply? This is life, man. Millions of people want what the OP wants -- to go to Disney and see A&E. Kudos to them for making a blockbuster hit which is filling rooms, fueling investment, and funding new projects.
Lots of folks gave lots of great advice on how to get to see them, still. I am not one to wallow in why she can't see them, or concede that her trip will be a failure, or to say "yeah, that sucks that Disney wanted you to be unsatisfied". I and many other guests suggested good ways to actually make it happen and not have to be disappointed at all.
Or is your advice that the OP should just accept that it won't happen, and she should be disappointed and blame Disney? Come on. She should go after what she wants. If that is getting a FP+, check several times a day for the next 2 months, check BOG, check CP, check CRT, and if all that fails still just go at Rope Drop and it will be fine.