Feeling down today...

[vicky1bfc]

I have applied for a job but it would mean i will be working away from home for a week at a time.Week on,week off.

The thought of being away from the kids for that long fills me with dread but the money's good so i need to do it.I know i might not get it and part of me doesn't want it but the other part of me does because the money will come in very handy now.

Everytime i think about it i just want to sob.


Does that make sence?

 

[wilma-bride]

It certainly makes sense that you are feeling upset at the thought of being away from your kids Vicky. Is the job something you really want to do as well as being good money? The only thing I would say is, if you know you will enjoy the job, that may make up for some of the sadness at being away from your family. Nothing more really that I can add except that I hope it turns out OK.

 

[AlanUK]

Hi Vicky,

I would seriously consider what you are doing here, if even the prospect of getting this job and being away from the kids is making you feel so bad. If you get the position and these feelings continue then it could lead to all sorts of depression and stress that would start to have a negative impact on both you and those around you

Perhaps you could look at other things in your life that could be done to give you some more financial freedom and security, but would allow you to feel more comfortable with things

I hope it all works out for you and that you are able to find a balance that makes you happy

 

[Cyrano]

I can understand why you are feeling so torn. You have to way up if this is what you really want and the security it will provide for your family or if being around and supporting your kids is more important.
Have you discussed with the kids the implications as this may well help you decide one way or the other?

 

[Kernow_Clan]

Vicky

I can sympathise (and empathise) with you on this. I have been working away from home for a long time now. Over the course of the last 10 years since being married, I have been away for anything from a couple of days to 4 months without seeing Mandy or the children. I currently commute from Cornwall to London on a Monday and travel back on a Friday. This has been since August last year.

That said, without this I would not be able to provide the lifestyle that I believe my family deserve. It is tough sometimes, it is very lonely sometimes, but it can also be very rewarding and a great way to broaden your horizons. You will meet people way outside of your usual circles, this is only ever a good thing. It took me 5 years from leaving the Army to get on to a good wage, being away was just a part of being an IT consultant.

You would not have gone for the interview if you did not feel the job was for you, so I hope that you are succesful, I hope that you enjoy the job. I hope that you are able to look at this in 12 months time as a positive step, and that your family`s fortunes will improve because of it. Good luck Vicky - I will be thinking of you.

 

[florida sun]

Vicky, just sending you some hugs

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.


Sue

 

[Minniespal]

Vicky ~

DF works one week here in Glasgow and one week in London. We don't have any children, so our situation is quite different. That being said I do know that it can be very lonely for him but also he gets to spend time on his own and enjoy things in London. Plus I get to visit London.

Good luck for what seems to be a tough decision

 

[gilld]

It's very easy to say go ahead or don't - I'm in a fortunate position and have never been so desperate for money to need to do such a thing.

However, personally, and surely it must always be a personal decision, I really don't think I could do it as for me, family life is more important than the extra cash. But you will know what is most importnt to you given your circumstances.

Good luck, whatever you do and let us know.

 

[Kernow_Clan]

Sorry, but I feel that is a bit judgemental - or is it just the way it reads??

It's very easy to say go ahead or don't - I'm in a fortunate position and have never been so desperate for money to need to do such a thing.


However, personally, and surely it must always be a personal decision, I really don't think I could do it as for me, family life is more important than the extra cash. But you will know what is most importnt to you given your circumstances.

Good luck, whatever you do and let us know.

 

[gilld]

Sorry, but I feel that is a bit judgemental - or is it just the way it reads??

I'm sorry but I thought long and hard about how to phrase what I wanted to say. I feel I made it clear that it has to be a personal decision, and that I am fortunate enough to not have to work at all, I choose to do a few hours as a pastime. Therefore it is difficult to say what I'd do, but when my children were at home I find it extremely unlikely that I could have left them alternate weeks.

In my job I see people from all backgrounds, some financially secure, some less so and some very poor indeed, lots of them struggle to make ends meet. There are jobs of all descriptions around although they may pay less but they are jobs bringing in extra money. The OP obviously doesn't really want to leave her family and I think both she and they may find life hard if she does so. But it is her choice and she does have a choice.

 

[vicky1bfc]

Gill-Actually my family are the most important thing in my life,they are the reason i have decided to go for this job.We need to make end's meet and unfortunatly in my job the pay is poor and the only way to earn a goodish amount of money is to work away from home.

Any parent would do whatever it takes to feed their child and make sure bill's are paid..Even if that means working away from home.I'm not going to go into details but really i don't have a choice,you do whatever it takes to make sure that your children have what they need, even though you might not like your choices.

How very nice it for you that you don't need to worry about money.

Thankyou everyone else

I haven't actually even had an interview yet,so really i shouldn't be even worrying about it yet,but i have the experience they would be looking for and have been doing the job for 3 years already but without working away from home.
I have mentioned it to the kid's as i didn't want to just one day tell them out of the blue.One was fine(i think she might be glad to see the back of me for a while )The other wasn't as fine but at least we didn't have any tears from her.

Apart from leaving the children i am looking forward to it(if i get it) It will be a new challenge for me as i'm growing a bit bored with what i'm doing now on a day to day bases.

 

[gilld]

Well, if it's right for you that's what matters.

Good luck.

 

[Kernow_Clan]

Gil
Hope I didn`t cause offense, it was the use of the word desperate that confused me
Personally, my aim was to earn good money, but it has taken a long time to do so.

Thanks for taking the time to clear up my confusion

 

[catherine]

Good luck to you Vicky.

I look at it this way, if it's the right thing for you and your family at this point in time, you'll get the job. If you don't get the job then it isn't the right thing for you to be doing right now. If that makes any sort of sense!

 

[Kernow_Clan]

Catherine, could this be summed up as Karma???

Good luck to you Vicky.

I look at it this way, if it's the right thing for you and your family at this point in time, you'll get the job. If you don't get the job then it isn't the right thing for you to be doing right now. If that makes any sort of sense!

 

[Tink78]

I don't have kids yet, but I would say that money can't buy you happiness, so think about this carefully.

Being away from them might cause more pain than the extra money can bring extra happiness.

I hope you don't get too stressed out whilst making the decision.

Good luck and well done on the new job if you do take it.

 

[KayleeUK]

Good luck with whatever you decide Vicky

 

[Madjock]

Being a working mum is tough under any circumstances! I appreciate from your response that you have little choice in the matter so I wish you the very best of luck Vicky.

As for the job, if it’s meant to be it will be.

 

[mandymouse]

Cor that's a toughie, good luck to you Vicky

 

[Ware Bears]

Good luck to you in whatever you decide.