Feeling a bit upset today - need to talk to someone

[jjk]

sending you a

 

[eyoreaud]

Poor You My dd's going through her Highers (A levels) just now and i know exactly how you feel I'm sure you'r boys appreciate you very much

Sounds like you're doing all you can and if you think a cash incentive or the prospect of a treat will help then go for it!

We got our Dd tickets for Paramore when they are playing at Hard rock live while we are in Orlando soon. These tickets are as a reward for all her hard work, wether she passes or fails or just scrapes through, it doesn't matter to us, just as long as she is happy with what she has done

I think we have to be careful not to put too much pressure on our kids though as whatever they do, they have done their best at that time, maybe an incentive works for some kids (we all know our own kids best) but it didn't work for my first Dd and she felt she'd failed us and herself so we vowed to try to do things differently with dd2 and try to see the bigger picture, it's easy to just think of the end results but sometimes the pressure of doing well and trying to please everyone is just too overwhelming.

Just my opinion and others may disagree, good luck with wharever you decide, i'm sure your boys will do just fine as they seem to have a lovely mum

 

[Lisash]

Don't worry too much Wendy he will probably do just fine. My DD's only interest in school was purely social. If I could have got her to spent one tenth of the time she spent on her hair and make up on her homework & revision she would have been a genius. I was really concerned for a while and we offered 'cash for grades'. She came out with 9 GCSE B's & C's and 1 D in PE which frankly I wasn't bothered about anyway. It cost us a fortune Just be supportive and patient with him and I'm sure he'll be ok

 

[UKDEB]

Wendy, please don't worry about either of your boys. You sound like a very caring and loving Mum and that is the most important thing for their journey in life.

Without wishing to undermine the importance of GCSEs, they are just a stepping-stone to the next stage, be it A' Levels or a job. One "D" wouldn't be the end of the world. The teacher's comments just sound like a slightly clumsy way of trying to reassure you that your son isn't stupid.

As for your younger son, everything is just the way it should be thanks to the fantastic job you've done. He has the confidence to want to walk to school on his own and friends to do it with. That's something to celebrate isn't it? It's natural that you should have a little tear as he reaches another milestone, so no need to beat yourself up.

 

[saratogagirl]

big hugs to you Wendy, you sound like a great mum

 

[KayleeUK]

for you Wendy

 

[Cyrano]

Wendy for you. I've always remembered the cliche

"Good parents give their children Roots and Wings. Roots to know where home is and wings to fly away and exercise what’s been taught them"

Parents are often the last to be acknowledged in the education of their children

 

[BRobson]

Cannot add anything more Wendy - we haven't quite reached that stage yet. You are a great mum by just being there for their kids. Heres a for you

 

[Lizzy Lemon]

I don't know what to say, I'm sat here with tears in my eyes thanking my lucky stars I discovered this site where I'm able to share my problems, and receive support and advice. The cash incentive is something we have done in the past as he loves money (or should I say having money to spend), unfortunately due to my character I always seem to focus on the negative and not the positive and that is something I don't want to happen to my boys it's unfair on them now and for their future, it's frustation more than anything knowing he can do better but then again so can I as a mum so I'm going to try and not nag but gently encourage - anything for a peaceful life. PS Ashley got to school OK, he was so proud of himself he's doing it again tomorrow.

Thanks again everyone, hopefully next year I'll be able to report good results.

 

[eyoreaud]

That's great news that Ashley managed to get to school safely, you must be so proud of him and yourself

 

[CustardTart]

I don't know what to say, I'm sat here with tears in my eyes thanking my lucky stars I discovered this site where I'm able to share my problems, and receive support and advice. The cash incentive is something we have done in the past as he loves money (or should I say having money to spend), unfortunately due to my character I always seem to focus on the negative and not the positive and that is something I don't want to happen to my boys it's unfair on them now and for their future, it's frustation more than anything knowing he can do better but then again so can I as a mum so I'm going to try and not nag but gently encourage - anything for a peaceful life. PS Ashley got to school OK, he was so proud of himself he's doing it again tomorrow.

Thanks again everyone, hopefully next year I'll be able to report good results.

Wendy, I'm sure we all go thro' tough times with our kids and I know I've been the same as you in the past, focusing on the negative rather than the positive. I think it's only natural when you're so close to a situation. Sometimes just sharing with others helps you see things that bit more clearly... Please remember we are here anytime and more than happy to listen...

Brilliant news about Ashley and well done you for letting him have that bit of freedom - I still worry when my 14 year old DS goes to the local shops for a bottle of Coke!!!