FBI AND CIA AGREE TO SHARE THE LETTER I
Congressional Critics Call Agreement Disappointing
In what the directors of the two agencies called an historic act of cooperation, the FBI and the CIA agreed today to share the letter I, effective immediately.
In the interest of homeland security, the FBI and the CIA are fully prepared to share this extremely important vowel, said FBI director William Mueller, who made the announcement with George Tenet, Director of the CIA.
Under the agreement, which is subject to Congressional approval, the FBI would have use of the letter I the first and third week of every month, while the CIA would have it the second and fourth week.
During the weeks when the CIA had the I, the FBI would be known as the FB, and during the remaining weeks the CIA would become the CA, Tenet and Mueller revealed.
But even as the FBI and CIA chiefs were celebrating their historic letter-sharing agreement, the plan was being raked over the coals on Capitol Hill, with lawmakers worrying that the plan to share one letter, albeit a prominent one, did not go nearly far enough.
Given that this agreement doesnt call for intelligence sharing of any kind, Im frankly concerned that sharing a vowel may be little more than symbolic, said House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi.
But the CIAs Tenet sharply disagreed.
Intelligence-sharing is great on paper, but at these two agencies, theres not enough intelligence to go around, Director Tenet said.
In a related story, Homeland Security chief Tom Ridge said today that the creation of a new cabinet-level Department of Homeland Security would mean that he would finally be able to order stationery and business cards.
***Borowitz Reports***
Congressional Critics Call Agreement Disappointing
In what the directors of the two agencies called an historic act of cooperation, the FBI and the CIA agreed today to share the letter I, effective immediately.
In the interest of homeland security, the FBI and the CIA are fully prepared to share this extremely important vowel, said FBI director William Mueller, who made the announcement with George Tenet, Director of the CIA.
Under the agreement, which is subject to Congressional approval, the FBI would have use of the letter I the first and third week of every month, while the CIA would have it the second and fourth week.
During the weeks when the CIA had the I, the FBI would be known as the FB, and during the remaining weeks the CIA would become the CA, Tenet and Mueller revealed.
But even as the FBI and CIA chiefs were celebrating their historic letter-sharing agreement, the plan was being raked over the coals on Capitol Hill, with lawmakers worrying that the plan to share one letter, albeit a prominent one, did not go nearly far enough.
Given that this agreement doesnt call for intelligence sharing of any kind, Im frankly concerned that sharing a vowel may be little more than symbolic, said House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi.
But the CIAs Tenet sharply disagreed.
Intelligence-sharing is great on paper, but at these two agencies, theres not enough intelligence to go around, Director Tenet said.
In a related story, Homeland Security chief Tom Ridge said today that the creation of a new cabinet-level Department of Homeland Security would mean that he would finally be able to order stationery and business cards.
***Borowitz Reports***