I posted yesterday about being sad about Father's day approaching I posted about my brother causing problems. My mom and dad were married 54 years when he passed and she is very strong, friends and family are impressed with how strong she has been.
But when my brother has started all this garbage and going back on things he promised my dad, it is just chipping away at her strength.
I am so afraid she is just going to snap. My brother was taking over my dads business (as I have taken over the farm, that is where my heart is) My fathers office and other buildings are on a corner of the farm, he is supposed to be paying my mom rent which would be part of her income.
Well, he hasnt paid a penny since my dad passed he sold farm equipment and never told us and put the money in his pocket.And money that the farm generates we found out has been paying for the landscaping at their home and making large payments on his wifes hummer!!!
About a month after my dad passed my mom called my SIL who works in the office and told her "I am coming out tomorrow to clean out Roger's desk", my SIL say's "oh ok I will see you in the morning". Now my SIL is a 
and she doesnt roll into the office until 10:00 or 10:30 my mom got a phone call the next day at 7:00 from my SIL "oh dont worry about coming out I cleaned out Roger's desk this morning!!!!!" 
Then she say's "I am sending Jessie up with his things now". Well, my niece Jessie brings my mom a plastic shopping bag with some papers in it and that is it!!!! My dad was a pack rat he saved everything and he had a HUGE plantation desk with a million drawers in it I personally know that desk was crammed full. My SIL tell's my mom "oh it was a bunch of garbage I was saving you the trouble!" She had no right to touch his things I feel it is part of the grieving process for her to be able to go through his drawers and touch his things cry laugh and smile and decide for herself what is garbage and what is not and my SIL took that away from her.
My dad about a year before he passed traded in and bought all new farm equipment so my mom and I when he was gone wouldnt have to worry about the old stuff or having to buy new stuff right away. Well my brother about a month after my dad passed tells us he is going to service all the equipment in the big garage by my dads office. So he sends a bunch of guys over (this was before he turned) to take the tractors and plows, seeders, bailers, forks and the combine (which for anyone that know's what a combine is that is a big ticket item) and other equipment. this was in November which is when we normally do all the end of season maintenance. Well, January roll's around and he is starting to pull some fast ones that my mom and I are now noticing, so she asks him "when are you putting the equipment back in the equipment shed?" and he tell's her "it's not done yet!"
Now the equipment has been sitting out side for 2.5 months now in the yard by the garage I ride my horse along that back fence line a million times checking the fence and I know that the equipment hasnt moved since he took it in November. Then about a week after my mom asked him this, a family friend who also has a farm calls me and asks "Do you have the book or anything on this bailer?" And I said "excuse me? What are you doing with that bailer?" and he say's "your brother sold it to me, he said you guys arent doing anything with the farm anymore and you are selling all the equipment!" I said "WHAT???? I dont think so, that S head I cant believe he is doing this!!"
My dads dream had always been for the farm to go on for generations and come you know what or high water I am gonna make sure it does!!! My brother is making it very hard. My mom eventually got my dad's attorney and he ordered my brother to return the equipment and start paying the rent. My brother signed a real estate contract saying he would pay x amount for rent of the office garage and other out buildings. Well he brought the equipment back all but two tractors and his wife has been sending my mom checks here and there for 1/4 to 1/2 of the rent and my mom refuses them and sends them back, she wants the full amount.
What's funny though is that if he never pulled all this garbage she would have been fine with what ever they gave her for the rent! Well, yesterday really put the icing on the cake now that we are under way planting plowing doing what we do we need the other two tractors. So my mom calls him and say's "I need my two tractors and the two seeders you havent returned yet." And he says to her "well what am I gonna use to do my fields?" and she told him "go buy a tractor and what you need I need my stuff" to which he replied "I AM SO SICK OF THIS @@#$^$$#@$#^%$%*&%^*&^$%$&^*%^*& FU!" And he hangs up on her!!!!! Now my DH physically stopped me from getting in my truck and going out to the office and driving right through the front of it. He wants to talk to me or my DH that way fine but dont you ever talk to our mother that way!!! So now I told my mom dont even try to talk to him anymore we will call the attorney and tell him.
My DH and I went out last night to the yard by the office and garage (my brother does not live on the property) we were going to just hook up the seeders to the tractors and bring them back up and put them in the equipment shed. But my butt head brother put them in the gararge and locked all the doors. So now he will have to have the attorney tell him again to be a good boy and give back the equipment! I also told my mom to let the attorney know about the rent again. So this is where we are at. And for me the main thing is that my mom, none of us actually has had the time to grieve yet. Sorry for the long post.
But when my brother has started all this garbage and going back on things he promised my dad, it is just chipping away at her strength.
I am so afraid she is just going to snap. My brother was taking over my dads business (as I have taken over the farm, that is where my heart is) My fathers office and other buildings are on a corner of the farm, he is supposed to be paying my mom rent which would be part of her income.Well, he hasnt paid a penny since my dad passed he sold farm equipment and never told us and put the money in his pocket.And money that the farm generates we found out has been paying for the landscaping at their home and making large payments on his wifes hummer!!!
About a month after my dad passed my mom called my SIL who works in the office and told her "I am coming out tomorrow to clean out Roger's desk", my SIL say's "oh ok I will see you in the morning". Now my SIL is a and she doesnt roll into the office until 10:00 or 10:30 my mom got a phone call the next day at 7:00 from my SIL "oh dont worry about coming out I cleaned out Roger's desk this morning!!!!!" Then she say's "I am sending Jessie up with his things now". Well, my niece Jessie brings my mom a plastic shopping bag with some papers in it and that is it!!!! My dad was a pack rat he saved everything and he had a HUGE plantation desk with a million drawers in it I personally know that desk was crammed full. My SIL tell's my mom "oh it was a bunch of garbage I was saving you the trouble!" She had no right to touch his things I feel it is part of the grieving process for her to be able to go through his drawers and touch his things cry laugh and smile and decide for herself what is garbage and what is not and my SIL took that away from her.My dad about a year before he passed traded in and bought all new farm equipment so my mom and I when he was gone wouldnt have to worry about the old stuff or having to buy new stuff right away. Well my brother about a month after my dad passed tells us he is going to service all the equipment in the big garage by my dads office. So he sends a bunch of guys over (this was before he turned) to take the tractors and plows, seeders, bailers, forks and the combine (which for anyone that know's what a combine is that is a big ticket item) and other equipment. this was in November which is when we normally do all the end of season maintenance. Well, January roll's around and he is starting to pull some fast ones that my mom and I are now noticing, so she asks him "when are you putting the equipment back in the equipment shed?" and he tell's her "it's not done yet!"
Now the equipment has been sitting out side for 2.5 months now in the yard by the garage I ride my horse along that back fence line a million times checking the fence and I know that the equipment hasnt moved since he took it in November. Then about a week after my mom asked him this, a family friend who also has a farm calls me and asks "Do you have the book or anything on this bailer?" And I said "excuse me? What are you doing with that bailer?" and he say's "your brother sold it to me, he said you guys arent doing anything with the farm anymore and you are selling all the equipment!" I said "WHAT???? I dont think so, that S head I cant believe he is doing this!!"
My dads dream had always been for the farm to go on for generations and come you know what or high water I am gonna make sure it does!!! My brother is making it very hard. My mom eventually got my dad's attorney and he ordered my brother to return the equipment and start paying the rent. My brother signed a real estate contract saying he would pay x amount for rent of the office garage and other out buildings. Well he brought the equipment back all but two tractors and his wife has been sending my mom checks here and there for 1/4 to 1/2 of the rent and my mom refuses them and sends them back, she wants the full amount.
What's funny though is that if he never pulled all this garbage she would have been fine with what ever they gave her for the rent! Well, yesterday really put the icing on the cake now that we are under way planting plowing doing what we do we need the other two tractors. So my mom calls him and say's "I need my two tractors and the two seeders you havent returned yet." And he says to her "well what am I gonna use to do my fields?" and she told him "go buy a tractor and what you need I need my stuff" to which he replied "I AM SO SICK OF THIS @@#$^$$#@$#^%$%*&%^*&^$%$&^*%^*& FU!" And he hangs up on her!!!!!
Now my DH physically stopped me from getting in my truck and going out to the office and driving right through the front of it. He wants to talk to me or my DH that way fine but dont you ever talk to our mother that way!!! So now I told my mom dont even try to talk to him anymore we will call the attorney and tell him.My DH and I went out last night to the yard by the office and garage (my brother does not live on the property) we were going to just hook up the seeders to the tractors and bring them back up and put them in the equipment shed. But my butt head brother put them in the gararge and locked all the doors. So now he will have to have the attorney tell him again to be a good boy and give back the equipment! I also told my mom to let the attorney know about the rent again. So this is where we are at. And for me the main thing is that my mom, none of us actually has had the time to grieve yet.
Sorry for the long post.
Long posts with no paragraph breaks can be very difficult to read.
this morning. I am so sorry you and your mom are having to deal with this. 
