Erik Menendez on Larry King

[Cindyluwho]

I watched Erik Menendez on Larry King last. Or actually I should say I watched an interview with his wife and attorney and they spoke with Erik by phone. It still amazes me that people judge him so harshly, or for that matter, feel that they are in a position to judge him at all.

As I stated in another thread, unless you have lived a life like he and his brother did how can you judge? How can you know how desperate you can feel when your whole life is controlled and abused by someone you love? It is next to impossible to break away, even after leaving home the control and abuse is still there. It's hard for me to explain, but I know those feelings of hopelessness and despair. I was lucky. I managed to finally break those ties when I was in my late 20's. But after years of therapy and meeting others in the same position I know that many folks aren't ever able to get away. The Menendez brothers made a terrible choice but at the time they most likely felt there was no alternative. I have felt those feelings and "there but for the grace of god" I wasn't brave/cowardly enough to act on them. I'm sorry they are in prison. Just my opinion but I wanted to share.

 

[In a hurry]

Oh my goodness! All those boys needed to do was walk away at 18. They stuck around and massacred their parents for the money. Money was the issue. Pure and simple. They wanted the money and killed, and then denied killing. They planned the killing, and there is no justification for that.

I am sorry for your circumstances, but you seemed to have dealt with it without murdering and stealing.

 

[brittsmum1998]

while I remember this story, wasn't the abuse all 'heresay' from the brothers?
I don't remember any witnesses to the brutal abuse "they" say they endured. I too think this was all about the $$

 

[Cindyluwho]

Oh my goodness! All those boys needed to do was walk away at 18. They stuck around and massacred their parents for the money. Money was the issue. Pure and simple. They wanted the money and killed, and then denied killing. They planned the killing, and there is no justification for that.

I am sorry for your circumstances, but you seemed to have dealt with it without murdering and stealing.

First of all, do you personally know that it was possible for them to walk away at 18? I mean, really emotionally possible? You can't even imagine what kind of power an abuser has over the abused. The money? Yes, there was money and plenty of it. Let's see what their alternatives were. They could have walked away, if they were emotionally strong enough, very rare for a person who has been abused their whole life. The father threatened to write them out of the will, another abusive tactic. So what kind of anger would that create. Let's see, they'd been tortured their entire lives and if they walk away their abuser gets to sit back with no repercussions. Trust me, even if they went to the police it would go nowhere. The father had tons of dough, there would never even be a trial. At the very most, if the boys had been able to get to court the parent's homeowner's insurance would have paid them a settlement, a pittance compared to their rightful inheritence. But, more importantly, have you lived through it? And if not, how can you KNOW what their feelings or motives were?

 

[Cindyluwho]

while I remember this story, wasn't the abuse all 'heresay' from the brothers?
I don't remember any witnesses to the brutal abuse "they" say they endured. I too think this was all about the $$

There were plenty of witnesses, most of them were family members. You can read the court transcripts. The abuse was torture, plain and simple.

 

[diznygirl]

Plenty of people walk away - as you yourself did - without planning a double-murder and lying about it afterwards.

Although I can't imagine what they felt like, I do know that in their case there were plenty of alternatives to killing. But they will have plenty of time to think about that now.

 

[Cindyluwho]

Plenty of people walk away - as you yourself did - without planning a double-murder and lying about it afterwards.

Although I can't imagine what they felt like, I do know that in their case there were plenty of alternatives to killing. But they will have plenty of time to think about that now.

You're right, plenty of people do get away. But, you can't say that they had alternatives. Remember that young girl from Utah that was kidnapped and taken as a bride by some wacko? There were plenty of times a person in a normal state of mind could have walked away but NOT HER. She was in a state of mind where it wasn't possible, there was no alternative for her but to stay. Even after the police approached her she insisted she wasn't the missing girl. You can't know what is possible for a person in a situation that you've never faced, you just can't know.

 

[In a hurry]

First of all, do you personally know that it was possible for them to walk away at 18? I mean, really emotionally possible? You can't even imagine what kind of power an abuser has over the abused. The money? Yes, there was money and plenty of it. Let's see what their alternatives were. They could have walked away, if they were emotionally strong enough, very rare for a person who has been abused their whole life. The father threatened to write them out of the will, another abusive tactic. So what kind of anger would that create. Let's see, they'd been tortured their entire lives and if they walk away their abuser gets to sit back with no repercussions. Trust me, even if they went to the police it would go nowhere. The father had tons of dough, there would never even be a trial. At the very most, if the boys had been able to get to court the parent's homeowner's insurance would have paid them a settlement, a pittance compared to their rightful inheritence. But, more importantly, have you lived through it? And if not, how can you KNOW what their feelings or motives were?

I don't care what their feelings were while they were plotting murder and getting away with it. If by some chance, they were abused, then that is a sad thing, but there is never an excuse to kill two people. Sorry. None. BTW, I don't see any inheritance as "rightful." If you didn't make the money, and it isn't yours, you have no claims on it. That is what getting a job is all about.

Walking away is tough. But people do it all of the time.

They killed because they wanted the money. It was more important to them than anything else.

 

[Tigger_Magic]

I don't consider myself to be in a position to "judge" them, however, I do believe they received a fair trial and were justly convicted of their crimes. That's all I need to know. A whiney sob story about alleged abuse (it is really stretching and overly dramatic to characterize it as torture -- I mean these kids lived in a mansion with millionaire parents; it's not like they were being treated like prisoners at Abu Ghraib!) is absolutely no excuse for committing murder.

The brothers had lots of choices; sadly they made an incredibly poor one. Now, like every other criminal, they must pay the penalty for their crime. No sympathy from me.

 

[Toby'sFriend]

I really honestly can't say I remember the specific details of the trial either.
But I don't agree with your point that "the father threatened to write them out of his will" as being terrible abuse and an unbreakable bond that is sufficient justification for plotting a double murder.

Just a question because as I said I don't remember the details, but if numerous family members could testify to the abuse --- did any of them say why NOBODY ever did anything to have the boys removed from the abuse? That is a shame.

 

[diznygirl]

While I agree that I could never imagine what they went through, I also would never put myself in the position of defending murder.

 

[inaminute]

First of all, do you personally know that it was possible for them to walk away at 18? I mean, really emotionally possible?

Yes. It is. I walked away at 17 after my mother nearly killed me. I'm truly lucky to be alive. It took me longer to walk away emotionally, but I vowed she nor my stepfather would never lay a hand on me again. And, I didn't have to kill them to do it.

I can make no excuses for the poor Menendez brothers. I was in shoes very similar to theirs. In fact, I could tell them stories that would curl their hair. The differenece? They wanted their fathers money. I could have cared less. I wanted my life.

But, more importantly, have you lived through it? And if not, how can you KNOW what their feelings or motives were?

Yeah, I've lived through it. And am discovering every year something else that was done to one or another of my siblings. FWIW, the four of them never considered killing our parents, either.

It makes me sick to think there are people out there trying to justify what these two young men did. They planned and carried out the murder of two people. There is absolutely no justification for that. No matter how abused they say they were. I don't believe them, by the way. Never have. The "abuse" seemed too convenient.

 

[clarabelle]

I was at home during their trial and watched it for hours! I was addicted to it.
The aledged abuse was really gross icky stuff (sexual and mental). I believed them.
That being said -they commited murder and they have to face the consequences. I don't think the motivation matters.

 

[sgtdisney]

If you read the transcripts or the books out about the case, those two didn't just kill their parents. The brutally massacred them in an extremely violent way in an attempt to make it look like a mob hit or something like that. I am not sure if they were abused or not. I know that some of the family said they were emotionally abused. That is terrible if it is the case, but I am still not sure if it is an excuse for premeditated murder.

 

[ChrisnSteph]

I watched Erik Menendez on Larry King last. Or actually I should say I watched an interview with his wife and attorney and they spoke with Erik by phone. It still amazes me that people judge him so harshly, or for that matter, feel that they are in a position to judge him at all.

These brothers will never get an ounce of sympathy from me. Why have they been judged so harshly? They shot their father in the back of the head at close range. While they hated their father, they supposedly loved their mother and only killed her because they felt they couldn't kill one without the other. So they shot her 10 times. And beat her head in four times. Nice. Then four days later they go on a shopping spree funded by their fathers insurance policy. Cars, Rolexes, you name it. All because supposedly they were abused and their father was going to cut them out of the will, yadda yadda. There are lots of people in this world who have experienced unpleasant things in their lives, but don't go out murdering people in retaliation. These monsters got what they deserved.

 

[Tigger_Magic]

I can make no excuses for the poor Menendez brothers. I was in shoes very similar to theirs. In fact, I could tell them stories that would curl their hair. The differenece? They wanted their fathers money. I could have cared less. I wanted my life.

Wow, this speaks volumes. Bottom line: it's all about what one truly values in the deepest parts of their heart. Here is an example of someone who valued life above everything else and made a decision based on that.

OTOH, the Menendez brothers valued money above everything else. One can try to parse the blame for how they arrived at this obviously stilted value system, but the result is the murder of two innocent people.

Two similar circumstances with two very different outcomes. It all boils down to what is valued and the choices made based on those values.