DVC... Good time for families to bond or spoilage?

[nickspace]

I honesty wonder if taking such nice vacations spoils the kids or do these trips deepen their appreciation and love for family? What do you think?

 

[adminjedi]

Both!

 

[JWG]

I'm on the both train.
We try to keep it low key, not that our daughter isn't spoiled completely. She's making her 4th trip this December and turns 4 this August. But we try not to center the trip around her and she has to do things she may not like. We've agreed not to go to the botique and try to only do one character meal per visit (have failed there).

We do parks she's less interested in to keep her understanding the universe doesn't rotate around her.

I think it's less about what you do there and what you do at home.

 

[ToddyLu]

I remember lots of family trips and they were never to Disney because it was just too expensive. I think children love their family automatically, now as they get older personality and hormones change...but in a healthy family, children are happy.

Now I will tell you how I learned the value of a dollar from my Daddy (now 72, I am 41). when I was about 11 or 12 he would let me balance the family check book. I knew exactly how much he made and how much the bills were. As I reconciled how much things cost with how much he made I could see why we could not do some of the things I wanted. My Mother had her own system of putting cash in envelopes. I did the check book for about 2 years I imagine. I also loved to go grocery shopping with them and we would have to stick to a list. They both were good at managing money and very little if any of it was wasted.

As soon as by brother was old enough to mow grass my Dad helped him get some yards. He bought a Sunfish sailboat with his own money at the end of that Summer which turned into and life long love of sailing. His next boat a few Summers later was a 14 foot Hobie cat. I on the other hand did not like to get sweaty and as the daughter would babysit for local folks, pretty regularly. In 1985, my Summer before Senior year, my Mom paid for a 30 day tour of Europe for me. SHe wanted me to have the opportunity. I think it was $1400 for the whole trip. We did nine countries and it was my responsibility to earn my spending money....I saved $700 all year, came back with about $15.

Jay, my brother and I knew college was the goal and my father saved every week. At 18 I went to the local Jr. College and then on to a Sr. College. My money was about $14000. Jay had a little more because he was younger. We just knew how much they saved and how important it was for us to have a perfect middle class life. But we had expectations to work and do our part, too. Once in high school, Daddy got me a little car but I would babysit to help with insurance and gas. I can remember putting 2-5$ worth of gas in that car as I went.

Today Jay is a very successful Nurse Practicioner with a Medical Degree (long story) and 5 kids with his wife Michelle (also a nurse). I am a RN also with a wound care specialty certification, married to a cute Fireman. We both still live close to home which I think I knew we always would.

As part of my gift to my parents through my adult years I have enjoyed taking them out to eat or just taking Mom to buy a purse, etc. Now that we have DVC, they will go on a trip with us next year, have a SV studio at AKV, of course as a gift on our points. DH's Mom is going this year. It is just a perk of being my Mom and Dad. They are just great people and I was a very fortunate little girl.

 

[dzorn]

A little of both.

Denise in MI

 

[ToddyLu]

I think it is a little of both. The trip to Disney and letting them pay for a day or two on the DDP or for their own souvenirs based on age. I mean a 3 year old isn't going to contribute, but I wouldn't expect to buy them every little thing either. Seems like we used birthday or Christmas money for our trinkets sometimes on trips.

 

[darbry]

@Toddy Lu
What a wonderful story...made me all warm and fuzzy reading it. I can't believe your father let you do the checkbook at that early age...I just keep thinking that my kid would go blabbing how much we made! LOL Hmmm...gives me more to think about. My son 12, doesn't complain about not getting anything...it's my dd7 who does that. Every one but her gets everything in the world!! Blah blah blah...if she could balance a checkbook I would be glad to show her right now!
Good story...thanks for sharing!

 

[darbry]

I guess my answer would be both. Now that we are DVC members we won't feel like we have to 'buy' the magic when we are there thinking 'When will we get back here again...we have to make it the most magical trip!' Now we know when we'll be back again so don't have to go to the extreme. My son is already saving his money for our next trip!

 

[Sammie]

I think it is all in how you approach it.
Such as Mom and Dad pick the resort, not the kids. I am amazed at how many parents let their young kids determine where they stay over their own wishes.
No expensive souvenirs year after year.
Same with meals, a few special meals instead of multiple character meals, or even meals with the family that everyone helps cook even the kids. Use the BBQ grills.

I definitely think with DVC you can find bonding moments over spending lots of money say instead of going to BBB, go to the community center, free movies at the pool instead of Disneyquest or the arcade, game night in the villa.

I had some friends come recently and they stayed at the cabins over a more expensive deluxe resort and there were multiple families at Disney at the same time they knew. So instead of planning an expensive meal together they invited the families to their cabin for a hot dog/burger cookout and then went to the campfire for smores.

The kids later said it was the highlight of their trip.

 

[miprender]

I say both too. On top of our several trips to Disney so far, we also have a family home in Maine that we go to many times a year.

When we were kids we had one trip a year and it was not to Disney.

I keep telling my kids how lucky they are but I just get this

 

[ACDSNY]

I'm in the both category too. Our kids were almost adults when we bought into DVC in 2005 so they still remember the old days...off site at DL and no WDW trips.

Now it makes taking all the family easier and then I get to spoil my grandson, nieces and nephew.

 

[El&Asmom]

I worry about this too. Dd7 will tell her friends that she has been to Disney over 10 times. We keep correcting her and telling her that it is not nice to brag about her trips. She doesn't see it that way at her young age. She sees it more as an exciting thing we get to do as a family. Still, she needs to understand that not everyone is as lucky as we are.

I traveled a lot as a kid. My mom is from Croatia, and we have family there. I spent many of my summers as a kid in Europe, traveling and just spending time on the farm with my grandparents. They are some of my fondest childhood memories. My kids won't have that, but I hope they look back at the trips we took, even if it's just to the WI Dells, or camping nearby and remember how much fun they had spending time with their family.

I agree that kids don't learn to be spoiled just on vacation. It's the other days of the year that matter. It's fine to learn that you can work hard all year, and enjoy yourself for a week since you earned it. As long as they learn the value of working!
They may be spoiled for nice hotel rooms though with DVC. When my parents took us places, it was always a run of the mill motel. Even as a child, I would always wish we could be staying at the nice hotel down the street. With time comes perspective though, and I appreciate that they instilled the importance of travel and seeing the world. Even if it wasn't at the Ritz.

 

[Brian Noble]

I honesty wonder if taking such nice vacations spoils the kids or do these trips deepen their appreciation and love for family

Yes.

My kids have never had a vacation in anything smaller than a 1BR condo. But, we have made a lot of family memories and traditions.

 

[kikiq]

I think it depends on how you approach vacations. Many of our vacations were tacked on to business trips or softball tournaments. If we could, we had kitchen facilities so we didn't eat out a lot although our DDs were taught early on what was expected in a nice restaurant. Our first visits to WDW were to the villas in the late 1980s. Our DDs have always been involved in the planning from making air and hotel reservations to how much we needed for food. They got one special souvenir and anything else was from their own spending money from allowances/job. My DDs are older now, would rather cook in the villa and have every one around the table talking and laughing. That's what they remember from our early vacations and that's what they still want to do.

 

[rentayenta]

Both!

The word spoiled implies not appreciative. I don't have a substitute though.

 

[AndriaRose]

Well, we bought as grandparents, so spoilage is kinda the point.

It's like the Christmas mornings when I would lay awake and listen to the DD creep out of bed and open her stocking. From my bed, I could hear her talk and oooohh and ahhh and go on as she pulled out each item, exclaiming over each thing in turn. The joy of a child makes the best memories.

Which is one motive I had for buying DVC - being able to take the DGD soon and often. Spoilage is just a by-product. My true reason, my selfish reason, is so I can hear the oooohs and ahhhs that only a joyful child can make.

 

[MinnieGi]

Great question - I agree "both" is the answer for our family. While DVC promotes such great family bonding and memories they are taken aback when presented with a "regular hotel room" on other trips.

 

[JBx3]

I think it is both but at completely different phases of life. When we were kids we went yearly, they only had 3 or 4 resorts in the late 70's. And our parents would rotate each year from CR to Poly, to Treehouse, etc. We would conquer all parks, inhale the pools, rent boats, grab souvenirs, and I remember this was where as kids, we would always order shrimp cocktails prior to dinner.

We were a bit spoiled but did not know it.

Fast forward 20 or 25 years later. My girlfriends first vacation out of her home state and our first vacation was at Disney....married her soon after....along comes DD and bing, the light switch went on and I realized the second part of OP's question. What an awesome time it was growing up and all the memories and traditions were finally realized.

But for me it took 2 different phases of live to appreciate it and realize it.

DD is now 8 and has been to Disney 5 times. She needs no map! And the same is happening all over again and it did when we were young. She is having a blast, smiling, and always excited to do the trip! We are trying hard to shown hear the memory / tradition part now so the gap of life between spoiled and tradition does not happen.

 

[ToddyLu]

Well, we bought as grandparents, so spoilage is kinda the point.

I love spoiling my Mom and Dad--no children here. MIL was grinning ear to ear when she stepped out on her studio patio last year and waving to us while we were out on ours. My Mom will ooooohh and aaahhhhhh, though. They are coming with us in 2011 to AKV. They stayed at Pop with us in 2008 and had a blast. DVC will open a whole new experience for them.

 

[cogero]

I would say both but I love spending the time together