DVC causes family problems?

[maepartner]

Originally posted by wheeler
I also get that " You're going AGAIN???!!!" comment all the time, (like it's the Hoover Dam or something, and you'd never need to go there more than once!)

LMAO Wheeler, too funny

 

[JADEMM]

Its the opposite for us. We are now "EXPECTED" to go because we have a "TIME SHARE DOWN THERE". Before that it was your going again?

 

[wheeler]

Well, my parents went once, around 1995, and stayed at the Contemporary for about 4 days with a convention for my Dad's job. They were not too impressed. They thought it was so "fake" and my mother even commented that she thought it was "creepy" that when she got up at 5am to go for a walk, there were people workers outside ripping up the flower beds and planting fresh flowers. I think she thought everything was too "perfect" and contrived (and that's a bad thing?!) for her tastes. My Dad is English and very "reserved" and was made a little uncomfortable a few times by a few well-intentioned but over-enthusiastic CM's that were trying to "force him" (as he put it!) to have a good time! That's my Dad, alright! Soooooooooo, I am greatly looking forward to my April 29-May 6 trip because THEY ARE COMING WITH US!!!!!!! They were very skeptical about this "Disney timeshare thing" and can't understand my enthusiasm for the place. When DH realized he couldn't make it, I thought to myself, hey, I've got a 2-bedroom at WLV for 9 days, why not ask them to come along?!!! They actually had to "think about it" (can you even imagine having to 'think about' that?????) then said, "Well, I guess so". I really think this trip will be able to change their opinion of the place, PLUS, they'll be spending time at WDW w/their grandchildren, which in and of itself would make for a better experience than an adult convention at the Contemporary, I would think!

 

[SleepyatDVC]

Too funny Simba's Mom!!! DVC was "my purchase/gift" although, dh enjoys it very much too! Dh got high end speakers ($$) and a 17" SGI flat screen monitor for "his gift." This was all last year when I had the baby. He still thinks that I came out ahead.

Well, he's been in a shopping mode recently and was thinking about buying some add-on points at BCV for me. Unfortunately, BCV is still not selling to NYS, so he didn't yet. Then I find out that he was eyeing some 17" wheels and tires for his car! So, after much discussion of whether he really needed expensive wheels & tires for a car that was only driven 4000 miles in 2 years, he decided NOT to get them. Too be fair, I told him to forget about the add-on for now since we have plenty of points and don't really NEED it... yet! Dh said get it if I want to - the one (DVC) had nothing to do with the other (wheels) - so he says. Of course my heart says "YES!" But my brain says "maybe later - too much money right now."

Now both of us is itching to buy something but have resigned ourselves to making some smaller purchases.

 

[mikesmom]

you made me remember my first trip to WDW. This was like 25 years ago and I didn't like it. I was in my early 20's, was newly divorced, therefore still in pain and very distracted. Also working about 70 hours a week. I had the same impression as your mom, that everything was too perfect and that gave me the creeps. I was also traveling along with some people that were business acquaintances. I'm sure they though bringing me along would cheer me up, but it was just too soon. The problem was with me, not Disney.

Fast forward about 15 years, my 2nd trip was with my 7 year old DS - everything was pure delight! We've made numerous trips since.

Sometimes it's the baggage people are carrying that changes the trip.

 

[wheeler]

very good point.....

... time for some new luggage!

 

[crisi]

We think my MIL will be like that - thinking the whole thing is wasteful and artificial. I want to bring her down - maybe when the kids are a little older - I think she'd enjoy a short trip - in a protected fashion where she isn't overloaded - a couple days of grazing through Epcot and a trip over to AK.

Then again, they've gone to Rome three times in five years. I've been to Rome and don't have much desire to go back. Guess I don't "get it."

But there aren't any family problems (although we just bought it) and I don't think there will be. I "cleared" the idea through with my dad, he thought it was a "good value" considering the trips we are planning with our kids, and "since we can well afford it" gave it the green light. Not that his red light would have necessarily stopped it, but it would have caused me to take a harder look - I do value his judgement.

 

[TrudyZ]

Wheeler:

I know how you feel. We bought into DVC last year after my husband said he could "probably stand to go one week a year". If it wasn't for our daughter having the time of her life, he would have never agree to take that "hit". He is really not bad once he is down there, but there are some peculiarities that I am left to deal with:

He is a very conservative midwestern. I have tried to convince him to spring for a 1 bedroom instaed of a studio. He says that since they both sleep four (we are a family of 3), what's the use of wasting all of that money (those points). Somehow, the comfort of the extra space and the romantic possiblities of the jacuzzi tub escape him....

Being from Minnesota (see above), forget ever going in the heat of summer. Or when it's crowded, or when it rains.....But, he wants it to be warm enough to swim--so I have a narrow operating window here.

Re: inlaws. We never told them we bought in. I can just hear the big sucking sound if they ever found out. We just unplug the answering machine and tell them it just must be those damn phone lines out here where we live. Luckily, both DH and I agree on this point. (But, it really kills me to spend $200 x 3 on plane tickets to go to the "great White North" in the middle of winter when the temp doesn't even crawl up to zero--and I hate the cold, when I know for the same $ for flights I could be on my way to OKW with my annual pass...the only snow I want to see is blizzard beach!)

Trudy

 

[gmboy95]

My family thinks i am nuts...so i adopted this policy...I dont care what anyone thinks about anything unless it is my wife and my kids....unless any of them start paying my bills they can sit and spin for all i care....they can have fun taking cruise ships through alska with the other blue hairs for all I care....wow...I feel better!!

 

[Johnnie Fedora]

I'm finding this thread to be very interesting.

Last year, we took my mom, dad and sister with us on a trip to WDW. We stayed at the Poly/YC concierge, so food would be available much of the day, so we didn't have to eat out so much. Well, to say the least, my father managed to have a wonderful time and a vacation of a lifetime........NOT!!

We were worried about taking him, as he is not very adventerous and has a way of becoming the little dark rain cloud (with the potential of becoming a hail storm). I think the parks were overwelming to him, and he just didn't get it. I don't even think he was capable of looking at it through the eyes of his grandchildren. We always went on fishing trips as vacations when I was growing up, and I think he has never learned to how to really travel. The last days of the trip, he stayed in the room.

Needless to say, this years plans only include my mom and sister. Sorry dad.......NOT. We will be staying in a 2BR at VWL. It is unfortunate that dad won't be going this year, as I think he would like the lodge's woodsy feel, but fool me twice....shame on me. I can tell my mom is excited about the trip as we saw the VWL models last year, and I know she will be blown away once we stay in one.

I want my mom and sister to go with us, as it is the only way they will ever vacation, mom's had it with the fishing trips. She likes to spend time and have fun with the grandkids. And just maybe....she needs a vacation from Dad

Maybe we'll have to add on again so we can get a 2BR for a whole week.

 

[SnowWitch]

Johnnie I am in the same boat kinda. I would love for my mom to go she would have a blast but my dad refuses to hear about it. My mom is from the old school, "If dad doesn't go she doesn't either." I wish I could get her to go but she doesn't want to upset SCROOGE!

 

[dianeschlicht]

TrudyZ,
Your post made me laugh! We are both from Minnesota, and at first we tried to use the studio is less philosophy, but it only took one trip in a 2 bedroom to change our minds!!! Now we could NEVER go back to a studio! Tried it once a couple years ago when it was just DH and I for a short 5 day trip. Nope!!! wont do it again!

As for the family... Inlaws don't get it, but my dad is supportive. He would like to go and would have a blast, but step mom wouldn't hear of it.

 

[wheeler]

SnowWitch: When my Dad was hedging, my Mom said, "Well you know what? To hell with him, then! If he wants to mope around the house like a grumpy old man then he can do it by himself!" This is a recent, yet refreshing attitude change. Until about a year ago.....she always stood by him no matter what, now I think she's realizing life's too short. Good for her, I say!

Johnnie Fedora: I go through the same thing every trip w/DH as you did w/your Dad last time. He holes himself up in the hotel room and watches TV after 3 or 4 days. I just let him...it's not worth the battle. I just have to accept that his idea of "relaxing" is to "veg out" in a coma-like state, whereas I am incapable of this and do the "comando" thing from the second the plane lands to the second it takes off to go home (well, that's a "slight" exxageration).

gmboy95: you're the best! I really really have to try hard to hold my tongue (I make 5x more than DH and bought DVC all on my own with my own $$$).....but a few times, he just pushed me to the "point of no return" with his complaing about, "I don't see why we're going to Disney again! Why don't we go to California or Arizona, or Las Vegas or Alaska?" and I said, "Why don't *YOU* cough up more than $20 for gas in the rental car while on vacation, and *YOU* can then make some of these decisions." As you would imagine, this did not go over very well, and I apologized profusely as it was an evil thing to say, but he was acting like a spoiled teenager. By this point, I had paid completely for 4 trips to Disney and 3 trips to Las Vegas and never asked for a dime from him, so for him to start "whining" about where he wanted his next "free" vacation, was just enough to push me over the cliff. He does do a lot of things for me that don't "cost" anything, but he was just really "pushing it" on that particular day, and I had just bailed him out of some situation or another with a couple of hundred bucks, so his timing was not good! (I'm glad this isn't the Community Board or I'd be flamed to hell for sharing this story I'm sure!

 

[yesdisneyfool]

Originally posted by vacationman
Just the fact that we don't have to "do it all" each trip makes for a far better experience. Every trip is a new experience for my kids since as they grow they "discover" new things at WDW. Also adding to her change in opinion has been the great accomodations - you can't beat the space and kitchen facilities a DVC room (of whatever size) gives you.

Second, no one outside my immediate family can understand DVC or our going to WDW so often. The only way we would ever get any family members to go with us would be to pay ALL of their costs... . I have worked hard to get where I am and...while I am the first to recognize that I have been very blessed in life, I don't believe in rewarding underachievement (but that's a whole different story - don't get me started).

I always regretted not being part of one of those families that got together each year or so at WDW. I am now making sure that my kids will never have the same regret.

Vacationman, you took the words right out of my mouth. Life is short, enjoy it with YOUR wife and kids. Make memories and share them together. We enjoy Disney and the feeling that it gives us when we are there. So we will do it as often as we can and those other family members are welcome to come and stay at a different resort.

 

[Johnnie Fedora]

We did the illuminations cruise, and while the fireworks were going on, Dad was stareing at the deck of the boat, and the underneath side of the bridge.



I just have to chalk some of it up to what I like to call GOPS (Goofy Old People Stuff (or substitute your own "S" word for stuff)

 

[friskylady]

Thanks so much for your great stories! Although, I have to say that I so empathize with the wives whose husbands don't know how to have fun. Mine is the same way.
He does not like anything to do with WDW, although I could have sworn he enjoyed a few moments during the two weekends he spent there with me and the two kids. But when I told him the other day that I would really like to buy a membership in DVC he looked at me like I had two heads
and said, "You're kidding!"
Then he said, "Wouldn't you rather buy a cabin in the Rocky Mountains?" which is another dream of mine. So, I point out that the two are hardly comparable in price! He didn't have a response to that, just looked unhappy. He said he would NEVER want to go to WDW again.

We are so incompatible in the Disney dept. that I have given up. No more WDW invitations from me! I'm going to have to find some more Disney friends to travel with!

 

[imgoingtodisney]

DH, MIL, DS and I all took the DVC when we were staying at the Wilderness Lodge 9 nights last Oct. We all got along great. In Nov DH and I bought into the DVC with the WL as our "home".
We were planning on having MIL along on some of our future trips. However, since we bought in there has been some family problems and if MIL doesnt want to see me - then we'll just have to go on our vacations without her. DH, DS and I are looking forward to our Nov cruise.

 

[wheeler]

That's why I posted this in the first place.....it was making me so sad thinking I was the only person married to a "Disney Dud", but as you can clearly see, we're not! It still makes me sad knowing that the person I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with couldn't care less about something I get so many hours of pleasure planning and having happy thoughts about. I mean, he doesn't even want to hear about any of it. I would not consider myself "obsessed" either. I work full-time +, and have 2 kids and a dog, and many other interests and hobbies and friends, but if I so much as mention something in passing about Disney, he doesn't even acknowledge I said anything, which I imagine is his "socially-retarded" way of saying, "who cares?" Makes me kinda mad too, since I was never the hugest Nascar fan in the world, yet I'll watch the races on TV and go to races with him because I know how much he loves them. That's life, I guess. At least we have the DIS!

 

[infobahn]

Wheeler,

Have you told him how you feel?

As a guy, we don't think past our skulls. Time to dig in your heals and say something. Stop going to Nascar races, or next time you do, bring a book.

Not that I am advocating a passive-aggresive way of dealing with this. It might be time for a couples weekend with your church (or temple, or whatever) if that is available.

"Sounds like what we have here is a failure to communicate" (hard-boiled eggs are optional).

It took a trip to WDW (a belated honeymoon), for my Wife to understand. Now there has been a DCL cruise, and buying into DVC. I had the other side of the issue, a Wife who was not Disney Obsessed. Now I have a Disney interested, Wife, the rest is up to her.

Good luck.

 

[Pumbaa_]

My DH and I took our first trip to Disney in September 1998. Boy, was I hooked! My DH likes Disney, has a great time while we are there, and is happy yo not have to plan a thing.

He is also content to go every year or every other year. I want to go twice a year. He also HATES to fly and driving is not an option. When this was looking like it was going to become a problem, we had a talk. I told him how I felt about Disney and that I was going every year, sometimes more. (I visit my DP who spend the winters there and we meet at Disney for some family time )

My DH was given two choices.
1. Suck it up and go with me
2. Or I was going by myself.

(Did I mention I married a wonderful man?)

We just signed the papers to buy 150 BCV points. He knows how important this is to me and has agreed to go once a year, and would consider every couple years a second trip. We have helped the flying problem with valium, (what a difference it made, he was much better able to handle the flight this time than before!)

I can still go more often (like to DisCon) but he is very excited about buying into the BCV. Loves the Epcot area and absolutely sees the value in buying in. He has actaully said (out loud!) that we should have done this years ago!

So Wheeler, don;t give up hope! If my DH can come around, there is hope! (And I do want to point out that I fully support his passion (fishing) to the extent I talked him into buying a 23' bought! (That was real hard )

I am lucky that my DH and I (married 19 years) respect each others interests and while may never 100% love it as much, we will have fun and support each other.