Duggars make 17!

[bigmerle1966]

I want to get into that racket. I would call my church "The Shrine of the Dust Mite - Holey Couch branch". We do have many pilgrims in and out praying at the kitchen door hoping God (or his high priestess) will drop a Freezer Pop into their outspread hands.

I belong to that church too! Lately, I have been listening to the whispers of a serpent named "Dyson". He tells me that I can rid myself of the Dust Mites with just a small donation of $500. What do you think?

I think it is a cult!

Did you see that episode when they had the interior designer come in to set up their new house. She was dressed all 'normal' with jeans and high heeled boots. I thought Mrs duggar was gonna pass out when she opened up the door and saw her.

I'm pretty sure that Michelle's family dresses "normally". One show had someone from her family on it, can't remember now it's been a while, I think her sister and she was dressed normally.

 

[bigmerle1966]

Scrappy, why did you become a teacher?

 

[DMRick]

I was always told my mom had 17 full brothers and sisters and 2 half. Recently I got a letter from a cousin, and the family tree was done and we found out there were 24 in my mom's family. My mom was second to the youngest (25 years difference from the first to the last..two died at birth and weren't counted..more than a baby a year). When she was just under a year, her mom left, never looked back, and remarried. I tried in the 80's to locate her mom (not knowing if she was alive or dead) on the computer. I recently found where she was burried. She had been married (legally? I don't know that she was ever divorced) to a man 20 years younger, and had died in 1945. Never getting in touch with all her children...and never having more children.

All the older kids had a younger child to look after, and they all had plenty of chores to do. I have so many 1st and second cousins..I had to make sure I wasn't marrying one! I'm still meeting them for the first time.

 

[Caradana]

Teaching the "traditional women's role" in the family is really teaching a girl to be subordinate, and submissive, and passive, and insular, and bourgeoisie, and it throws a stigma on the notion that she might want anything beyond the four walls that surround her. It's a characteristic of generational poverty, it's the whole idea that "I'll teach her less so I can talk down to her if she chooses to step out at all." Over my dead body will I ever teach a girl that her life is cooking tater-tot casserole for her brothers.
Just my $0.02.

 

[clutter]

All I know is - I have 6 kids and when I call the youngest - I literally go down the list of names before I get to his. My kids are Rick, Steve, Julia, Olivia, Isabel and Luke. So when calling Luke - it sounds more like "Ri, Ste, Jul, Liv, Is -LUKE!" I can't imagine what calling their youngest is like!

Than again don't they have all "J" names? So I guess it just sounds like a massive stutter!

I'm the youngest of three, and to this day, I don't have a name. On the one hand it's funny, but on the other hand, it's really tough on the one without their own name.

 

[Maggi May]

I don't mean to disparage or question the Duggars' love for their children, but when I see and read about the Duggars, their situation reminds me more of a group home than it does a "traditional family."

A older friend of my grew up in what was then called an orphanage, what would now be called a church-based group home. There were house parents and the older kids often helped with the younger kids. My friend speaks well of his experience there, stays in touch with people from the home, and often describes the group dynamic of living in a large home with many other children. They were cared for and loved, but in no way the same as a family.

 

[Hixski]

I'm the youngest of three, and to this day, I don't have a name. On the one hand it's funny, but on the other hand, it's really tough on the one without their own name.

Thats funny!! DH has 4 brothers. He is the baby at 48. His DM is 93. Nine out of ten times she calls him one of the brothers name. She has been doing this as long as I have know DH. That has been 26 yrs.

 

[LadyBears]

Quote:
Originally Posted by transparant
All I know is - I have 6 kids and when I call the youngest - I literally go down the list of names before I get to his. My kids are Rick, Steve, Julia, Olivia, Isabel and Luke. So when calling Luke - it sounds more like "Ri, Ste, Jul, Liv, Is -LUKE!" I can't imagine what calling their youngest is like!

Than again don't they have all "J" names? So I guess it just sounds like a massive stutter!

I'm the youngest of three, and to this day, I don't have a name. On the one hand it's funny, but on the other hand, it's really tough on the one without their own name.

That's ok - I'm an only child. To this day, my mom calls me by my Dad's name & calls my Dad by my name - mostly if she is flustered or mad, but still...she has been doing that for as long as I can remember!! I couldn't imagine what would happen with a sibling in the mix!!

 

[JKanownik]

Exactly. She reminds me of someone who loves being pregnant, loves the newborn, but then doesn't enjoy the child anymore and pretty much just hands it off to someone else to care for.

This is exactly the way my MIL is. She loves them when they are babies, but as soon as they get old enough to misbehave or get into trouble, she ignores them and has another baby. DH is the oldest of 10 and he had a horrible childhood. He always had to worry about taking care of his younger siblings and never had time to be a child himself. We both agree that it is a waste to society to have that many children. There are so many kids that have already been born who need homes. The Duggars are only adding to the problem of over population.

 

[MrsKreamer]

LOL!! I so do that too!!

I do it and I only have 2 kids!

 

[ducklite]

but not nursing, midwifery or teaching?

Yeah, that wasn't insulting to us teachers or to midwives.

you mean the aforementioned nursing, midwifery, and teaching? Gosh, I never realized I was indentured until now.

You asked why I felt that some had belittled the choice to either become a teacher or become a wife and mother??????

Three options in life. Well woop-dee-doo basil. I'm not belittling those career choices, God only knows we need more nurses and teachers. I'm expressing concern that they are the only options. And I highly doubt that nursing will be in the picture, as it would require leaving the nest--you can't become a nurse (or a teacher) by taking online classes.

I also remind you that you are making these judgments based on several hours of HEAVILY edited television. You have no real idea about the hopes and dreams of these children and this family and what their plans are.

Nor do you.

It is very possible that some of the girls will go on to become doctors and lawyers and scientists. Maybe some of the boys will be teachers, maybe they will all be farmers, or go into real estate. Or become fire fighters. We just have no idea and only time will tell.

On the taxpayers dime due to the way they file taxes while there are truly needy kids who will be denied as a result. But it's also highly doubtful. The girls in particular are not being exposed to those job options in the religious based curriculum they are being home schooled from. Additionally they aren't getting enough math and science background to pursue most of those options. Engineering school without high school calculus? Nursing school or even a pre-med program without HS biology, chemistry, and physics (with labs)? Not going to happen.

I'm not saying that all home-schooled children will be denied those opportunities, but that the HS curriculum they are using will not be acceptable for them to get into a lot of programs. And even if they do wiggle in, between the culture shock of leaving the compound and the shift from counting scoops of laundry detergent and steps from the garage to the end of the driveway with the garbage can as their educational curriculum to the real world of college, I think they'll fail miserably.

Anne

 

[BuzznBelle'smom]

Whew! This thread is tough to keep up with!

My concerns with the Duggars:

--kids expected to fill in for parents. I'm all for kids doing chores, but when one child is spending all her time doing laundry while another is devoted to preparing family meals, there's something wrong.

--Lack of choices for the children, especially the girls. If you want to play the violin or try out for basketball, you're SOL. And I agree about the girls and possible career choices. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being a SAHM (I'm one, myself), or teacher or midwife. But children should be allowed to choose from lots of available options.

--I worry about how much education they really get. It's just impossible to tell, given that they're homeschooled, if college would even be attainable. A PP mentioned science labs, which is an excellent example. I'm not saying the children aren't educated, just that you don't know, and caouldn't tell unless they were tested in some manner. Or, they went to college and were found lacking (or not!).

--They been very blessed, health-wise. If this continues, great. If something happened to Michelle, then what?

--The tax shelter stuff ticks me off, but if what they're doing is legal, I can't really blame them. But I do feel like we the Great Unwashed are funding their lifestyle choices. That would tick me off regardless of what those choices actually are.

OTOH, I have to give them credit for having well-mannered, polite children. The house seems more organized than mine, that's for sure. Certainly, they all seem happy with their choices, at least for now. Heck, maybe all the kids WANT to play violin and never considered the drums--I don't know.

 

[DISUNC]

I really dont know too much about them. But if they are all Healthy & Happy and from the website they seem self sufficiant!

Good for them!

 

[Disney Ella]

Teaching the "traditional women's role" in the family is really teaching a girl to be subordinate, and submissive, and passive, and insular, and bourgeoisie, and it throws a stigma on the notion that she might want anything beyond the four walls that surround her. It's a characteristic of generational poverty, it's the whole idea that "I'll teach her less so I can talk down to her if she chooses to step out at all." Over my dead body will I ever teach a girl that her life is cooking tater-tot casserole for her brothers.
Just my $0.02.

ITA! In addition to forcing the girls into traditional women's roles by virtue of showing them no other options, I also have a problem with the total control the parents seem to want to exercise over the kids' lives. It seems that they never have an option to make even the smallest decisions. Michelle has even said that when the children want to date, they will never go on a date unchaperoned since that could lead to their hearts being broken. At some point, you have to let the kids go, but I don't think the Duggars plan on this. I feel sorry for the poor kid who wants to rebel. Where would he or she go, with no money and no friends outside of the Duggar family or those few families that share their beliefs?

 

[Green Tea]

While I certainly wouldn't want that many children, if they do, then why should I care? They seem to be taking care of them all. The culture of helping to care for siblings and doing work to help the family seem to be old school values. Nothing wrong with that. Not my cup of tea, but it is up to parents to raise their families as they see fit. It isn't a case where the mom is a prostitute continually giving birth and leaving the babies on the hospital steps addicted to crack.

If they are rejoicing in the the birth, who am I to tell them they are wrong.

 

[mom2taylorandemily]

Finally! Someone posting something positive about this family! With all the pain and suffering in this world, all the children who are abused and thrown out like trash, here we have a family whose values are solid, they love and care for one another very much, the children are so well spoken, helpful, and loving to one another and all I'm reading on this post is how awful it is! Please people! These are the kind of people who SHOULD have lots of kids - the amount of patience from that mother is beyond measure! Even the little ones are respectful and thoughtful. Have you ever watched Supernanny on ABC? I mean last week the boys were saying FU to their mother and worse! My gosh - the disrespect in this world towards parents and authority in general is mind boggling! They know their children are priority and put them as such!

I am so glad to see that someone sees this the way I do. I see way too many kids who come from small families and the kids have no respect, feel no love and it shows. Coming from a large family can and does have its advantages, its all in how you run your family. I have great respect for the way that they have raised their kids. They are all home schooled and appear to be very intellegent, they all play musical instruments and all have a love for the Lord. None of these children appear to be suffering in any way, granted we only see what they want us to see on TV, but somehow, if there was a problem child, I think somehow it would show up somewhere. But to me it looks ok, and they are not living on my tax dollar.

Let them live their life and love and enjoy their family.

 

[ducklite]

they are not living on my tax dollar.

Actually by virtue of their tax exempt status, they ARE living on your tax dollar. Maybe not getting an actual hand out, but they sure aren't paying their share for the running of the government.

Anne

 

[mom2taylorandemily]

Actually by virtue of their tax exempt status, they ARE living on your tax dollar. Maybe not getting an actual hand out, but they sure aren't paying their share for the running of the government.

Anne

Just because they don't pay taxes (and I'd like to know on what basis they were granted tax exempt status), isn't what I meant. I meant that they are not taking advantage of the welfare system. I see far too many people on any given day, buying a cart full of groceries purchasing them with a state funded debit card all while driving away in a Lexus with Timberland shoes, nails all done up, and dressing in clothes I would never be able to afford for my kids. So, when I see a family paying their own bills and buying their own food with their money, that is what I mean by not living on my tax dollar.

 

[mom2mek]

Actually by virtue of their tax exempt status, they ARE living on your tax dollar. Maybe not getting an actual hand out, but they sure aren't paying their share for the running of the government.

Anne

There are a lot of home churches - there's has a numbered membership of over 100 people. I know a lot of churches that have memberships that are a lot less than that! They have "bought used and saved the difference" (that's their motto) and own commercial real estate debt-free that they have rental income from. The man served the government (in the form you are supposed to I might add, i.e. he didn't spend his entire career in politics but instead served and went back to the private sector - politics is not supposed to be a life-long career but a obligation to serve and return to private sector living - something most politicians have lost sight of).

They save, buy at auctions, purchase clothes at thrift stores (they could use a makeover, but geez that's a lot of people to try and clothe in more up-to-date styles). We could all learn something from these people in regards to living on a budget! Yes, they have sponsors, and get help from people, but so do people who decide to do IVF and have 8 babies at one time. These people don't ask for anything from anyone other than themselves, but if people or TV shows want to pay them for telling their story - more power to them!

 

[chobie]

but not nursing, midwifery or teaching?
Yeah, that wasn't insulting to us teachers or to midwives.

you mean the aforementioned nursing, midwifery, and teaching? Gosh, I never realized I was indentured until now.

You asked why I felt that some had belittled the choice to either become a teacher or become a wife and mother??????

I also remind you that you are making these judgments based on several hours of HEAVILY edited television. You have no real idea about the hopes and dreams of these children and this family and what their plans are. It is very possible that some of the girls will go on to become doctors and lawyers and scientists. Maybe some of the boys will be teachers, maybe they will all be farmers, or go into real estate. Or become fire fighters. We just have no idea and only time will tell.

If you are insulted, that is your issue--not mine. Again my husband is a teacher and I was a SAHM. My mother was a nurse and a teacher. I have no problems with those professions. My problems is not exposing the girls to other careers they can pursue.

I would feel the same if they were pushing their kids to just become doctors or lawyers and make them feel like any other career choice is bad/immoral or whatever.

To limit your kids potential is wrong and that is what it appears they are doing.


Oh and as far as the program being heavily edited...if you can take the tidbits you see on tv to determine they are a well-adjusted family, then others can take those tidbits and find they are not.