DS4 talking about "when you die"

[becpee]

x

 

[POOHDRMR]

She started saying things like when you die who will be my mom and I will miss you.She is almost 9 now and will still say things sometimes-she says she will visit my grave and put flowers on it everyday when I die but it was more of a phase when she was 4 and now it is only when we are talking about someone who has passed that she usually brings it up.At the time I had asked around and it seemed like it was a thing that some kids do around 4.She is a worrier by nature but other than that she is a normal happy 8 yr old child!I would just tell her that I wasn't planning on dying for a long time!

 

[PoppyGirl]

You could try asking him to draw you a picture of the "witch". Sometimes kids connect words with totally different meanings than adults.

I usually ask my kids open ended questions to get them talking....for instance when my DD had an imaginary friend I would ask her to tell me about her friend. What was she like? What foods did she like?

How did he find out the witch would look after him? What makes him think you might die?

Sometimes the answers are far simpler for the child than we make them in our adult minds...

 

[Sparx]

Has he seen anything on television about dying parents? It might be something like a movie or tv show thats causing him to think about it.

 

[HamTown]

That's around the age most kids start to be fascinated by death. They're able to understand the concept by that age. It's a normal phase.

It does tend to freak out the parents though.

I agree with a PP, have your child draw a picture of the "witch". It would be interesting to see what you find out.

 

[Miz Diz]

When my ds was 4 and 5, he would constantly say things to me like, "When you die.(fill in blank with whatever a 5 year old would want - ie I will stay up as late as I want, I will buy a cool car................" I thought it was strange, because it was a daily thing he would say to me. I was starting to think I better lock my door at night.

Now my dd is 5 and she has been saying to me, "I'm going to miss you when you die." and "Will I be a big girl when you die?"

I wouldn't worry about it.

 

[KLAIT]

Yes, that is the age my DS became interested about death and talked about it as well. There was one conversation that I thought the same as you that I hoped I wasn't going to die soon and he could sense it. 8 years later and I am still kicking and have been told by friends that it is the stage they go through.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Just part of the phases of development of a 4yo. Here is a good read that goes over the 4yo development.

http://www.nncc.org/Child.Dev/ages.stages.4y.html

 

[D L and K's Mom]

I think talking about parents dying is a very common thing. Both my DDs talked about when I died but oddly never my DH. I tease my DH and would tell him it was from all the Dead Moms in the Disney movies...poor Disney Mothers! My first graders used to play "Dead" at recess. I think it is a very common thing.

 

[monkeybug]

Yup it's an age thing!
I had this conversation with my 4 year old son on the weekend.
"When you got me from my other family I was a baby"
"What other family? You didn't come from another family, you came from my belly."
"No you got me from my family that's dead"
"Your family that's dead? You don't have a family that's dead!"
"Yes I do. They're my dead family...can I have a Popsicle?"

 

[minkydog]

I highly doubt that he had a premonition. My guess is he felt pretty bad, probably had an intense fever-dream, and since witches have been on his mind lately, put 2 and 2 together and got 3. i wouldn't put any stock in his so-called psychic powers. Lots of kids start talking about death at this age--they're just starting to get that sometimes things die. Just answer his questions simply. I would also have him draw pictures. It will help him express his feelings better than words. Most kids don't have the words to articulate their feelings clearly until they are a good bit older.

 

[becpee]

x

 

[disneymarie]

I have no idea where this came from, and home he doesn't have some psychic power thats telling him I'm going to die he's only 4, he hadn't been near any other children since Friday, so a few days ago and i'm just baffled to where this has come from?

Have any of your children said anything like this??

Boy is that familiar,

I started a little later then t4, I think I was close to 10, dd started about that age, 4. It is a panic attack, I felt so crushed as she would climb in bed, and then say she was afraid to die, I went through the same thing, some nights still I go from bedroom to the other checking on the kids, curling up with them.

Dh has gotten use to me just reachig over and holding him and panting, so terrified to tell him I am afraid to die. Things are right in my life with my beliefs, but would miss my family so much.......

They are not so bad at night now, for dd, but day terrors have been triggered by a lack of her ability to not control her surroundings, Mainly from things she should deal with..
EX, she was having the anxiety/panic attacks and not sleeping well for school, She is an excellant student.

If kids were teasing, her or anyone, if someone got hurt she panicked,.

THe staff at school were no help, bullying started and she developed school phobia,

I would contact the pediatrician, They deal with this all the time. There are ways to divert the attacks with changing into light moment of good memory,

Identify the triggers, scary shows, cartoons that are brutal, even Scooby doo would upset dd,

Now at 14 she is okay with Scooby, BUT terrified of Aliens. Big time dead serious, She reads alot of Steven Hawking to prove me wrongI tell her that they are humans in the future a million years from now traveling back in time to see if there is something that could protect humanity.....

The witch part, he may have vivid dreams, not getting a deep sleep and a great imagination that plays out scenarios. Try creating a book time of great stories to have this be the last thing in his mind when he sleeps.
Keep an eye on it to pass, or if it gets chronic....

My hugs to you Mom, reinforce happy songs, and get the mind from the panic.

 

[Evi]

your kids are freaking me out (jk) I remember when my nephew was around 4-5 we would walk past the cemetery and he told me it was nice that they put everyone's phone numbers on the headstones so you could call them and talk to them when you miss them. I remember thinking wouldn't that be nice and how cute what a nice thing to think when your little. I didn't tell him anything different though I do wonder what he thought when he realized that's not what the numbers are for. Hes 20 now and I've never thought to ask him.

 

[bumbershoot]

I looked up nurofen. It's ibuprofen to us. Just an FYI, ibuprofen makes me totally high. Just one normal sized pill and I'm whacky. Post-op I was on 600 mg and I was hallucinating BIG-time.

So honestly I'd watch it with the ibuprofen, because maybe the drug caused this.

Also, a lovely lovely way to lower a fever, if you want to do that, is a nice tepid bath. Sure, it gets you up in the middle of the night, but it can lower the fever nicely, and then you really know when the fever's gone and it's not just reduced from the chemicals. Tepid baths are awesome when you want to lower a fever, if you want to lower it.


DS started with the death talk early, as his beloved grandfather died (and our cat ran away while grandpa was in the hospital and hubby didn't close up the house properly AND MIL gave away grandpa's new puppy...lots of loss all in one month) when he was 2.5 years old. It's changed over time, but it's always weird to hear it!

Last talk we had, he was full on describing reincarnation (without having a concept of it, as DH doesn't attend a Buddhist temple at this time)...I love those talks.

 

[Aisling]

I looked up nurofen. It's ibuprofen to us. Just an FYI, ibuprofen makes me totally high. Just one normal sized pill and I'm whacky. Post-op I was on 600 mg and I was hallucinating BIG-time.

So honestly I'd watch it with the ibuprofen, because maybe the drug caused this.

Wow, I worked in the pharmacy field for 10 years and I've never heard of reaction to ibuprofen like you describe. It inhibits the synthesis of prostaglandin, which is the natural body chemical that allows us to feel pain, and in some people it causes them to feel physically numb, which can be interpreted by them as mentally numb also. But becoming "high" from it? Hmmm...I know that many people have even TRIED to get high using ibuprofen, but couldn't.

You should have your blood pressure checked...ibuprofen can raise blood pressure, and you may have felt that effect which you interpreted as being high. It just doesn't have any narcotic, stimulant, or hallucinagenic properties in the compound at all to cause what you describe. It's like saying you ate a grape and it made you high. Seriously, check your blood pressure!

OP, I'm sorry for the highjack!

 

[crashbb]

Wow, I worked in the pharmacy field for 10 years and I've never heard of reaction to ibuprofen like you describe. It inhibits the synthesis of prostaglandin, which is the natural body chemical that allows us to feel pain, and in some people it causes them to feel physically numb, which can be interpreted by them as mentally numb also. But becoming "high" from it? Hmmm...I know that many people have even TRIED to get high using ibuprofen, but couldn't.

You should have your blood pressure checked...ibuprofen can raise blood pressure, and you may have felt that effect which you interpreted as being high. It just doesn't have any narcotic, stimulant, or hallucinagenic properties in the compound at all to cause what you describe. It's like saying you ate a grape and it made you high. Seriously, check your blood pressure!

OP, I'm sorry for the highjack!

Clearly, you are not aware of our resident medical marvel. ibuprofen makes her high, Aleeve makes her homicidal, cinnamon cured her MIL type-1 diabetes. And that's just the a few things.

 

[Deb in IA]

I looked up nurofen. It's ibuprofen to us. Just an FYI, ibuprofen makes me totally high. Just one normal sized pill and I'm whacky. Post-op I was on 600 mg and I was hallucinating BIG-time.

Wow, I worked in the pharmacy field for 10 years and I've never heard of reaction to ibuprofen like you describe. It inhibits the synthesis of prostaglandin, which is the natural body chemical that allows us to feel pain, and in some people it causes them to feel physically numb, which can be interpreted by them as mentally numb also. But becoming "high" from it? Hmmm...I know that many people have even TRIED to get high using ibuprofen, but couldn't.

In addition, bumber, do you think that it was the anesthesia, and not the ibuprofen, that made you hallucinate?

Clearly, you are not aware of our resident medical marvel. ibuprofen makes her high, Aleeve makes her homicidal, cinnamon cured her MIL type-1 diabetes. And that's just the a few things.

And let's not mention HFCS, ok?

 

[RainbowBrite]

Clearly, you are not aware of our resident medical marvel. ibuprofen makes her high, Aleeve makes her homicidal, cinnamon cured her MIL type-1 diabetes. And that's just the a few things.

No no - albuterol makes her homicidal.

 

[Aisling]

I meant no disrespect to you, Bumbershoot. Judging by the posts after mine, I see that there are some issues with you and certain medications that I didn't know about. Maybe you're just one of the rare very sensitive people to certain meds. I know when I've used Motrin I just didn't feel "right", not high, but weird enough not to take it anymore. But who knows, I could be blaming the Motrin when something else was the cause.

Anyway, you know your body and what feels right to you. (but I still suggest to keep an eye on your blood pressure when you take medications, if you don't already, just in case it.)