Ds 11 Crying In His Room Right Now

[kidzmom3]

My DS 11 has been in school for exactly 7 days. Today I get a call from the school nurse. He has a headache and upset stomache. She gave him tyelenol but he came back 1/2 later still complaining. I go to school to get him, state very clearly. If you come home now, you will not play with your friend Dereck. Dereck is our neighbors grandson, my sons very good friend, but they don't see each other often. Dereck is here from Saturday until Tuesday night. Saturday DS was at a sleepover, stayed Sunday til 5pm. Tommorow their is no school, and my kids will have to go to their Grandparents house. He claims hes better, begs and pleads to go outside and play with his friend. I stay firm and say no. Hes crying in his room now. Would you give in????

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Nope. You stated clearly BEFORE you took him home "the deal".

 

[gr8tpanther]

I can say that I wouldn't give in, but truth is, I most likely WOULD cause well, that is just me

 

[Frank Babaganoush]

Yep. Sometimes its Ok to give a kid a break

 

[perdidobay]

No... he knew the rules.... even if he was really sick and IS better now, if you let him go play he will think he can get away with doing this in the future.

 

[KathyTX]

Nope.

If he's sick, he needs to rest.

If he was faking, he needs to not be rewarded by being allowed to play.

 

[Serena]

Don't give in. It makes it very hard when they are teenagers if you do.

 

[Beth76]

Don't give in. You made a deal. You both need to stick to it.

 

[momof2inPA]

Ahh, let him go. Maybe there's something going on at school-- bullies, mean teacher, he needs glasses. I would give him the benefit of the doubt.

 

[noel]

I would not give in either, although I would make sure that there wasn't something else bothering him that maybe made him "fake" the headache and stomach ache just to get out of school early....or maybe he really did feel sick and is better now.
Either way, he left school sick, so tonight IMHO he should have to stay home and rest.

Although I am not a parent, I can say from experience on being at the receiving end of a puishment (or consequence, as this doesn't seem so much like a punishment) that my parents were always sticklers when it came to following thru with the consequences that were clearly explained to me when I was growing up.... and looking back on it now I am glad they were like that.

 

[Hillbeans]

I'd give in tonight but make another night this week a "no tv or playing night".

If this friend isn't around much it'd be sad for him not to see him. This way you can still have the "punishment" so to speak just at a later time.

 

[mommytotwo]

He is old enough to understand the rules and I would not given in. He may try to get away with things more if you do give in this time.

 

[Dancind]

I think you might need to find out what's going on at school, especially if this happens again (though he may avoid you finding out so he won't get punished again). When DD was a first grader, she went to the nurse's office almost every day. Turns out she had a very abusive teacher, and it was making her "sick". She never told us what was going on, they don't tell on their teachers. There's also the possibility that he's being bullied. Of course, it may also be that there's something at home he'd rather be doing.

 

[Frank Babaganoush]

It all depends on his track record I guess. Does he "fake it" often?

 

[DisneyDmbNut]

Give him a break..Haven't you had a really bad headache in the morning and felt better after a few hours.

Trust me..life is too short and childhood too precious to sweat the small stuff.

 

[ripleysmom]

Nope.

If I get a call about either of my kids from school I tell them that there will be no TV or video games and they will spend the time in their room. Somehow they manage to stick it out and are magically all better by the evening.

 

[Disney Doll]

I agree with the posters who said that I would probably delve a little more into why he was "sick" at school and is now suddenly better.

As far as the punishment, like it or not, I'd stick to it.

I was a kid and we were eating in a restaurant and I was acting up and my mother told me if I acted up one more time, we'd go sit in the car while my father and brother finished dinner. I didn't believe her. I acted up. We sat in the car.

After that, I always believed her.

 

[Teejay32]

I'd let him go. I choose my battles....this wouldn't be one.

 

[chrissyk]

Maybe he was faking it, but I'm seriously wondering if he had a migraine. A headache and an upset stomach do go hand-in-hand when you have a migraine. I had them as a child, so it is possible for an 11-year-old to have a migraine.

If he was faking it, I would keep the punishment. If he was really feeling ill, I would let him go out. I'm not sure how you figure this out though.

 

[mickyzzzzz05]

I would stick to it - it will be hard this time for him, for his friend and for you but next time he will know that when you say something is going to happen that it will happen. Makes things so much easier on everyone if you stick to the promised consequences and don't give in.