Doreen's New Way of Life (comments are welcome)

[DoeWDW]

There's NOTHING good on that table!!

I've actually walked by it and nothing looked that good to me! However the evil Carb Vending Machine.....well, I won't be going near it this afternoon. Nothing in there tastes as good as thin feels!!!

I'm chowing down on a nice big salad - lots of dark greens, a few carrot slivers, bell peppers, olives, ham, shredded cheese with my favorite Kraft 1000 Island dressing. I've run out of Trident gum, so I may have to make a snack bar run to get more if the Munchie Monster even TRIES to get near me!!

Edit: 2 PM
No sign of the Munchie Monster!

Yesterday was my dreaded monthly meeting. At the very end of the meeting, it occurred to me that this meeting falls in the worst part of my D-Zone every month! No wonder I was over-stressed! I asked the participants if I could change it from the 3rd Thurs. to the 4th Thurs. of the month and all agreed. I just finished adjusting the meeting schedule and the conference room schedule! I'm so proud of me for finding a way to make this already stressful meeting a little easier on myself! YAY for me!!

Edit: 4 PM
As soon as I wrote about the Munchie Monster - he showed up!! The snack bar had my trusty Trident so I was safe!! I was NOT lured to the Evil Carb Vending Machine - YAY!

I've been drinking TONS of water today and I don't feel as bloated so maybe I'm drowning the Bloat Fairy??!!

Just about quittin' time at work - I got a lot done today! Now it's on to the weekend. The only "gotta dos" are the Christmas shopping and Christmas cards and one little package that needs to be mailed out. I'm HOPING to get to see the new Lord of the Rings movie....<crossing fingers>. I also am responsible for Sunday School attendance this month.

Good news about my son, Chris! He has branched out from Jello and dry toast! He has successfully eaten some chicken noodle soup and some tapioca pudding today - sounds like he's on the mend!!

Life is good! I've made very healthy eating choices today and I feel better because of it. Can more exercise be far behind??

 

[ZerasPride]

Doreen!

I was panicking myself when I realized I was running low on Trident. I like the Speariment and they only had the small one that has 5 sticks in it but it will have to do until I can get to the store tonight. You are doing so well, keep it up!

 

[DoeWDW]

Lately, I've been having very good days, and horrible nights! I struggle to eat healthy for the entire day, avoiding all the nasty junky food. I'm proud of myself for not giving in. Then I go home and undo all of it! This has happened a couple times this week!

Doreen's First Rule of Avoiding Junk Food: If you know it's a trigger food that you generally overeat, do NOT bring it into the house. For instance, if you KNOW you will eat the WHOLE pint of Ben & Jerry's ice cream, stop rationalizing in the store aisle that you can just eat a little each night for a few nights! Duh!!

Doreen's Second Rule of Avoiding Junk Food: Learn from your mistakes. For instance, if you've eaten a whole pint of Ben & Jerry's ice cream two nights ago, then DON'T buy another pint, thinking this time will be different! Duh!!

There!! I've written it down! Hopefully I can LEARN this lesson once and for all! I've been willingly setting myself up for failure by buying this stuff and I don't know why?? Yes, I'm in the D-Zone and craving carbs. Yes, I know that once I've overeaten carbs it takes DAYS to get rid of the cravings. Yes, my son was sick this week and I was stressed. Yes, work was a bit stressful too. Yes, the holidays are coming up and I still have things to get done so I'm stressed about that. Etc. etc. etc........

There are lots of good EXCUSES I can come up with but they do not change the fact that I'm putting unhealthy food in my body and I'm feeling lousy (physically and mentally and emotionally) about it.

Being very strict doesn't seem to work for me, but obviously being very relaxed doesn't seem to be working either! I need to set some realistic goals somewhere in the middle, but I don't know where that is yet. I've been thinking about it for 2 hours now and have not come up with any answers. I just know that what I'm doing right now is NOT helping me get healthy. I also know that putting this off until after the holidays just sets me up for more failure. I need to find a middle ground and stick to it through all the upcoming festivities.

Time to stop moping and having my little pity party. I need to stop TALKING the TALK and start WALKING the WALK. All these pretty words and goals and promises mean nothing if I don't honor them with the right actions.

Where do I go from here?? I'm not sure, but I'll be trying again today to take baby steps toward healthy living. Those baby steps do NOT include Ben OR Jerry!!! What's done is done, and I can't change it. I need to move forward. The road is shrouded in fog at the moment, but I know it's there. If I go slowly and carefully I hope to find it again...... I will not give up!

 

[ZerasPride]

Doreen - I just read your latest journal posting and wanted to send you a great big . The stress of everyday living can really contribute to sabotaging our weight loss efforts. I appreciate your sharing so candidly how you are feeling right now. I just wanted you to know that you are supported here and give you a bit of encouragement. Losing weight is not easy and there are so many temptations and pressures that make us want to go back to our old eating habits.

I know you can find a middle ground that is right for you. Please take care and I know you will find the answer that is right for you. I have a feeling you are going to find a way to kick Ben and Jerry's butts out of your freezer!

 

[lulu201]

Hey, WISH-sis, I'm sending a private message your way. . .

Erin

 

[DoeWDW]

Lisa, thanks for the kind words and the hug - I needed both!

Today was a better day. I was so disgusted with what I've eaten the past week that it was easier to be good today.

I missed breakfast - not sure how I did that? I had a yummy lunch at the mall with DH - it was a marathon Christmas shopping day!! We're all finished now - YIPPEE!! Lunch was a chicken cheesesteak without the roll and stir fried veggies. Dinner was a Wendy's salad. I ALMOST reached for some chocolate for dessert but I decided that would just set me up for more cravings, so I'm staying away from it!

Tomorrow, I'm back on the wagon. I'll be eating on plan, drinking my water and getting some exercise. I'm not making any long-term committments - but for tomorrow, those are my goals and I WILL meet them.

I'm feeling more hopeful and am encouraged by my WISH-friends and their unfailing support, even when I feel like I don't deserve it. I couldn't do this alone - I have all of my WISH-friends to thank for helping me get this far.

 

[ZerasPride]

Hi Doreen! It sounds like taking things one day at a time is the best way to go. I know you will be able to stay on plan for Sunday. Take care!

 

[DoeWDW]

I'm up early and already in my workout clothes. I want to get that exercise in early - it seems that I get lazier as the day goes on!

I have no meals planned yet but I'll tackle that later. For now, I need to exercise. One thing at a time......

 

[lulu201]

We're doing this, Doreen!

I'll check back in to see how things are going around lunch time. Make sure you've had your meds and vitamins by then, OK? I'm going to get my vitamins out now--oh, and I'm going to set them out for tomorrow, too.

Talk to you soon,
Erin

 

[DoeWDW]

WOO-HOO!! My exercise is DONE! I did the WATP 2 mile (the OLD one without weights). I'm sweating! Boy, I always feel good when I'm finished - it's the getting started part that's so tough!! But with my WISH-sis's encouragement, I was determined to get that exercise in today!!

Now I'm off to make a healthy breakfast and get ready for Sunday School and church.

I feel fat and bloated today, but if I drink lots of water, I think some of that will go away by tomorrow.

Edit: 4 PM
Breakfast = 1 serving pumpkin custard & meds - 6 carbs. Lunch = 2 servings pumpkin custard - we were on our way out to the movies & I didn't want to go hungry - 12 carbs. Snack after the movies = 1 oz nuts - 6 carbs. Total so far = 24 carbs.

Dinner will be hot dogs and baked beans (I'll be having VERY few beans!) at the family's request. I'll have some raw veggies too. I have some sf jello & whipped cream in the fridge for a sweet treat if I need it.

Hey, WISH-sis Erin ! Hope you're doing great too! This day hasn't been easy for me - those cravings can be a real pain - but I haven't given in!! Stay strong, girlfriend!!

 

[lulu201]

Hey, WISH-sis, you're walking the walk today--in more ways than one! I hope you're enjoying the movie; I think it was a great strategy to have your protein bar on hand in case you wanted a snack. It beats Junior Mints anyday!

I'm going to do some laundry and wrap some gifts. Maybe put some Christmas music on? It's going to be a mellow afternoon.
(Sigh of relief here.)

Talk to you later,
E.

Edit:

You know, I agree. It WASN'T an easy day, but for me, it was tolerable because we were in it together. Because I exercised, took my vitamins, drank water, and didn't binge, I can hold my head up again and look in a healthy direction. Thank you, Doreen, for accepting this challenge with me. I wouldn't go so far as to say that I'm totally on the right track--I feel like my situation is still rather precarious, but I'm a day stronger and a little bit more confident about tomorrow.

Speaking of tomorrow, I'm going to do this again for Monday. Just for tomorrow. What do you say, WISH-sis? Do you want to try or was today enough?

 

[DoeWDW]

Count me in for another healthy day, Erin!! We can do one more day together! :happy1:

Dinner was 2 hot dogs with cheese and some baked beans - 30 carbs in all. I also had an sf jello and whipped cream for dessert. I finished up the Christmas cards and we saw the movie we've been waiting to see.

Today was a good day! Thanks, WISH-sis Erin, for helping me through it!! I, like you, am holding my head up a little higher and facing tomorrow with a little more confidence.

Let's do it again, Erin.....just one more day!

 

[DoeWDW]

Here we go! 16 hours of healthy living today, and one hour is already just about over!

I was up at 5 AM and did my 20 minute Pilates. TOM is here with a vengeance - wicked headache, nasty low back pain and cramping. It will only last a day or two, so I can get through it, as long as I have my Ibuprofen bottle with me!

I'm off to work this morning. There's lots to do at the office, but it's all stuff I can handle. I'm looking forward to the comfort of my regular work routine. I definitely drink more water there!

I have pumpkin custard to take for breakfast. Lunch will probably be a big salad from the cafeteria salad bar. Dinner?? That seems awfully far away and I really have no idea what to make. Everything sounds kind of boring. I'll think about it later.

15 more hours to go!

 

[lulu201]

Ouch! I'm sorry that TOM is bearing down upon you; I know that discomfort all too well. I'm on the other side of it now for this month, but I'm, uh, dealing with the consequences of giving in to the cravings I had last week. More about that later in my journal.

Congratulations for getting up and exercising in the midst of your ouchy time! What an inspiration you are for me! Yeah, you're a great WISH-sis and a terrific example to boot!

I'm singing that same "dinner is kinda boring" song; our challenge must be to come up with some yummy new things to eat. I'm going to seriously think about something new for breakfast. . .I haven't had the pumpkin custard since Thanksgiving; maybe I'll start with that. It always sounds good to me when I read that you've had it.

Yep, today is going to be lived hour by hour. WE CAN DO THIS!

Healthy and happy and enjoying the holidays--that's us, Doe-Doe!


Erin

 

[DoeWDW]

I've followed my WISH-sis' example. I got on the scale this morning and accepted the consequences of all my latest actions. I'm at 132 - at least I can still keep my clippie. Yesterday I weighed 131 in the morning even though I felt more bloated, exercised, ate healthy...and now I'm UP a pound?? Oh well, my siggie has been changed and today is a new day. Living the healthy life is not ONLY about the number on the scale! I will perservere!!!

I'm eating breakfast (12 carbs), have taken my meds and ibuprofen, am drinking my water - off to a great start! I brought lots of vitamins to work - I'll be taking one with lunch (thanks for the reminder, WISH-sis!).

I can do this!

Edit: 9 AM
12 oz water down. Took a second ibuprofen. Baby steps....

Edit: 10:20 AM
More water, third ibuprofen....
The pain is wearing me down, but I'm working hard to stay sunny on the inside. At least I'm still getting some work done.

 

[lulu201]

Here's a to help with the pain, girlfriend. Oh, and some extra , too. Do you have any tea there with you today? Have a cup as a way of pampering yourself just a little bit. Remember, yummy snack mix from the E. V. M. (Evil Vending Machine) will NOT help in the long run. NO! A nice cup of gentle tea, though, will soothe and calm your raging cramps.

and another to help with your afternoon.
Erin

 

[DoeWDW]

Erin, what a great idea! I'll make a cup of hot tea - sounds soothing - and I'll toast to you while I'm sipping - CHEERS!

(how did you know the E.V.M. was calling me???)

Lunch was a protein bar - 2 carbs and a 1/4 lb hamburger patty w/ lettuce, mayo & mustard - 2 carbs? That's only 16 carbs so far today. I purposely ate a lot so I'd be very full this afternoon - no snack mix from the E.V.M. for me! I also took my vitamin.

My headache is better - not all gone, but manageable. I think we women just learn to tolerate a certain amount of pain.

Here we go, into the afternoon!

Edit: 3:45 PM
Almost time to go home! I made it through the workday - hooray!! I never did get around to making tea, but it's on my list for tomorrow. The E.V.M. stopped bugging me and I was busy all afternoon so the time passed quickly.

I'm headed home around 4:15 - won't get there until 5:15-ish. I'm hoping for a quiet evening at home, but I'm afraid DH might have other plans. He was talking about taking DD and a friend to the mall.....sigh.

Dinner - still have no idea....

Onward we go!

Edit: 7:30 PM
Everyone stayed home tonight. It's 7:30 and I STILL have no idea what's for dinner!! DH & the kids are talking about Pizza Hut pizza - what will I eat???? I am determined to stay low-carb, even if it means eating the toppings off the pizza and throwing away the crust!!

Edit: 8:45 PM
Dinner - grilled cheese on low-carb bread - 16 carbs and sf jello w/ whipped cream. I stayed way below my 60 carb goal today. I did NOT give in to my cravings for the pizza my kids ate in front of me OR the chocolate in the house.

It wasn't an easy day, but I made it through and stayed true to my healthy living goals! I'm proud of me but I feel exhausted, tired of working so hard at it. I think tomorrow will be a healthy living day but I'm not ready to commit to it.

 

[littleducksmom]

doreen.........what a great day you had!!!!!!!! stay strong thru the pizza!!!!!..........you are inspiring to me!!!!!!!i'll be checking to see how you do.

deb

 

[lulu201]

I LOVE SURPRISES!!!!!

Thank you, thank you, thank you! A PM is on its way!

 

[DoeWDW]

Today will be lived one decision at a time. I just don't have the energy to map out a game plan and goals. I've been walking the healthy walk for a while now (since August) and I'm going to let my good habits carry me through today.

My first good decision was to get up early and do WATP 2 miles. I feel so good when I get my exercise in early! I also tell myself that I can't visit the DISboards until AFTER I've exercised - THAT gets me motivated!! I LOVE to DIS!!

Now I'm off to get ready for work. DH is off through the holidays so he's taking care of things like DD's orthodontist appt. today - she finally gets her braces off after 4 LONG years!! He's also picking up the ham for Christmas dinner and doing some other errands. He's such a sweetie!

Step by step, decision by decision today - no grand plans or goals - just healthy living one baby step at a time.

Scale this AM = 131
Pedometer - steps yesterday = 5100.
I already have 3700+ for today from my WATP this morning!!

Onward, maybe downward

Edit: 8 AM
B = pumpkin custard - 6 carbs. Meds taken. Working on my water. Vitamins on the desk for lunch.

These healthy habits will get me through the day! I can almost operate on auto-pilot!

Edit: 9 AM
Snack = 2 pieces bacon - YUM and no carbs! 12 oz water down.

Edit: 10:45 AM
24 oz water down. I'm still making good choices today!