Does everyone force their "junk" on you?

[disneydreamersx4]

You have a polite daughter!

 

[angwill]

My mother frequents second hand shops and continually gives me boxes of junk etc. I came to the conclusion that she just could not throw it in the garbage herself and needed to borrow my will power to do it for her. She brings in the junk and as soon as she walks out it goes in the garbage can. I stopped even looking through it. The majority wasn't even good enough for the goodwill.

One time she asked if I liked something in one of the boxes and I told her I didn't get around to looking. She then asked if I even bothered to look through it before I brought it out to the garbage and I honestly told her no. She always knew but was grew up poor and from that just couldn't throw stuff out herself because she didn't want to be wasteful.

 

[angwill]

My mom and sister do this to me all the time. The funny thing is that we make twice the salary of both of them but they still think that their junk will be a treasure to me. I've told them I don't want it, tossed it in the trash while they are sitting there and snuck it back to their houses and piled it in their closets.
Lately they've been sneaking it to my kids when they visit and I have to "shake them down" before they come home to make sure the crap doesn't make it into the house!

My mother used to sneak stupid little toys to my DS so when I cleaned out his toy boxes I would find all kinds of weird things. One time it was a million plastic little naked babies wearing only diapers. They were everywhere and I laughed every time I found a new one. DS was about 10 years old at the time too so way too old for plastic babies.

 

[charming23]

My Grandmother does this to me everytime we set up or take down her Christmas decorations. She is always trying to pawn the stuff she no longer wants off on my Aunt and I.

 

[Halbleib1]

Not junk as in used items but junk as in my mil has a shopping problem and will buy stuff for us that we do not need/can not use as gifts. She always over buys and so we are always left wondering what to heck to do with the stuff. It is all brand new stuff just not things that we need or will ever use.

My husband recently told her not to buy us a lot for Christmas as we just have no room for more stuff. She probably will not listen though and come Christmas I will have a huge pile of stuff with no idea where to put it. Esp. with another child on the way. She will use the baby as an excuse to buy buy buy.

 

[AndreaDM]

We took them to be polite but when we got home DD said "mom I don't want to wear old lady sweaters to school".

LOL! You should have checked to see if any of them could have been worn to an ugly Christmas sweater party. My MIL couldn't believe neither of my teen daughters had no use for her 3/4 length sleeves, padded shoulders, pale pink blazer. Yeah, that's what all the cool kids are sportin' these days...maybe back in 1985! They live about 6 hours from us and we can never escape a visit without a few boxes of "treasures".

 

[john1928]

Clearly, no bachelors posting in this thread .

Back in my college days I don't believe I owned a single piece of new, purpose-bought furniture except my bed. Even when I built my house it was much of the same for a few years while filling "extra" bedrooms, den, family room, dining room, etc. I had no problems with a second hand couch for the 4th room that needed a couch, which I might sit in twice per year...

These days, I'm married with a 2 year old. Over the last 5 years or so the chairwoman of the aesthetics committee has decreed that almost all of that stuff has had to go and we don't accept any new random "stuff". IMO the clutter level is way higher than when I was single, but the quality of the clutter is also better I guess .

 

[angwill]

When someone is broke and just furnishing a place 2nd hand furniture is a very welcome thing. It is when you are settled and have enough money to buy what you need and are starting to feel cluttered yourself and your relatives who hord and can not get rid of things push them off on you that it is no longer welcome. lol It is the thought that counts and it is nice to be thought of but when you clearly tell them your trying to declutter yourself that it gets to be a bit much.

 

[Halbleib1]

When someone is broke and just furnishing a place 2nd hand furniture is a very welcome thing. It is when you are settled and have enough money to buy what you need and are starting to feel cluttered yourself and your relatives who hord and can not get rid of things push them off on you that it is no longer welcome. lol It is the thought that counts and it is nice to be thought of but when you clearly tell them your trying to declutter yourself that it gets to be a bit much.

So true.

 

[starwood]

My mother does this also. When we first got married we got everyones used furniture (which was good because we didn't have any). Now we have replaced it all but she still tries to give us stuff (and not necessarily used). When we have a garage sale to try to get rid of our junk she says I have a lot of things you can sell and keep the money. I tell her I'm trying to get rid of our stuff because I know I will be left with a lot of leftovers.

Just yesterday she showed me a new blouse she bought and wouldn't I like if for our cruise. I told her I had more than enough clothes. Then she pulled out a beach towel she got at the Trump Castle in Atlantic City the day before and did I want that. She thought I could use it for a bath towel. I'm trying to get rid of towels and get nice new ones. I know her heart is in the right place but I just don't have room anymore.

 

[chellewashere]

My SIL will give me all her DDs clothes in bags that I just say aww thanks to then promptly throw in the garbage. They are nasty well worn clothes. While I appreciate the gesture please dont give me dirty, smelly, torn and gross clothes.
My DH gpop is a trash picker and used to stop and give us the things he thought we might need out of the trash. Hello it was TRASH. My husband used to keep it until he tried an electric sander once to fix some boards in our house and it sent a fire up our wall. I think his gpop is a hoarder of sorts he has lets say 4 used coffee makers that he refuses to get rid of cause he can use the parts to fix another one.
When my MIL gives us gifts its always things picked up at yard sales for Xmas. My DD first bday she gave her a piano that was so filthy and still had the .10 sticker on it.
My house is so cluttered that it looks dirty all the time. Thankfully we have decided to move and are in the process of going thru each room and throwing out everything...wish the trashman was able to take more than 5 bags at each trash removal day

 

[patsal]

I have come to the conclusion that people do not want to take responsibility for tossing out their own stuff, as a result they give it to others. My house is filled with other's treasures they couldn't part with. I felt guilty throwing them away and now I have to weed through all the crap and toss it out. I have about an 8 foot by two foot path in my basement that I can walk to the washer and the freezer, the rest is everyone elses junk. It has to go, it is a huge waste of space and insanely cluttered--if hoarders came in they'd think I had a problem...my problelm is everyone gives me their stuff and I feel badly throwing it away in case they want it back!
I refuse everything now, but seriously unless I started a new layer over the old one, I'd never get anymore crap into the house!

 

[Poohbug]

Yes-OP, I feel your pain.

We have a 40x60 pole barn and everyone wants to store their stuff in there. Of course they then forget it is in there.

When we do our once a year cleaning, we ask around for the owners to this or that but things are never claimed. We have carpet remnants, boards, pool stuff, bicyles, boxes of siding and more. much more.

I also get bags of hand me down clothes for my boys. I really do appreciate them but when their drawers already have 30 t-shirts, I can't really fit any more in there. Now I just look through the bags, pick out the things we can use, and take the rest directly to goodwill.

 

[jennyopenny]

Am I related to every one who has posted on this thread? Holy cow! I would love to have a yard sale to raise some extra Disney money. The problem? My Mom and Grandmother would come over, and a)find all the stuff they passed on to me, and b)give me grief over WHY I am selling.

For example, My Mother let us borrow a desk when we first moved. It was in my brothers room growing up. We got a new desk that matched our decor six month later. Fast forward EIGHT YEARS~every time I ask about the desk, I am told that my brother MIGHT want it. She won't take it back, my brother won't pick it up, and it is cluttering my guest bedroom.
I put it on craigslist yesterday.


Oh, and don't get me started on the candles that had melted in her garage that she brought to my house. LOL~really?? Melted candles???

 

[Disneyglobegirl]

LOL - My SIL use to give me bags of clothes for the kids that her kids had outgrown however our kids were built differently and most of the clothes did not fit my kids. I usually graciously accepted them as I didn't want to be rude however that stopped after she made the comment on how I should start buying her kids new clothes yearly because they will be passed down to mineShe was dead serious! I told her that because the kids were obviously built differently that most of the clothes just did not work for my kids. I suggested that she give them to someone else or goodwill them. There was no way I was buying her kids new clothes so that my kids could get them after they were worn out

 

[Juliet25]

Yes! It's so annoying. I know people are trying to be nice, but foisting stuff onto other people out of the blue is just rude. I have a lot of baby stuff to hand down, but I always specify what it is and ask my intended recipient of they need what I have. Otherwise, I'd rather take it to Goodwill than inconvenience someone.

 

[QVCshopper]

I have come to the conclusion that people do not want to take responsibility for tossing out their own stuff, as a result they give it to others.

So true! It's hard to throw stuff away, so people give it away to feel better. My MIL gives us food; cookies other people make for her that she doesn't want; frozen and then unfrozen and refrozen donuts; etc. It drives me nuts! I usually take it and throw anyway anything gross. She also overshops and a lot of her food is old and expired.

She also was forcing my DH's grandma's table and chairs on us when she went in a nursing home. I didn't ask for it, didn't need it, hadn't really seen it in years, yet I was suppose to take it? No way. I just kept making excuses until someone else took it. Someone else wanted me to take a patio table--that didn't happen either.

As for my house, I put things outside or take it to a charity and it all disappears! I also have tried to not buy as much myself, which cuts down on clutter as well. I have a lot of clothes and toys I am meaning to weed out soon though.

 

[Ephany]

When my parents moved, my mom would mail me (from west coast to east coast) boxes and boxes of crap. Stuff she'd been holding onto, but for heaven knows what reason why. Old, falling apart books, my sister's prom dresses, patches, random junk that I honestly couldn't see why she saved much less spend $30 a box mailing to me. It was awful! My dad would intercept what he could, but she just couldn't understand why it wasn't as important to me as it was to her. Finally it died down, but 99% of it went straight into the trash; it was moldy, filthy, and if I couldn't remember why/when I made it or bought it, it didn't need to kept any longer. I did mail my sister her prom dresses though; Mom knew they weren't mine and I still have no clue why she thought I'd want someone else's dresses.

We don't live in our home most of the year because I attend school elsewhere, so I'm taking advantage of the opportunity to do all of the maintenance like replacing floors and painting walls while it's mainly unoccupied. There's minimal furniture (a folding table and chairs), 2 airbeds, and a few storage bins but that's it. DH and I plan to move items from our rental house at school back home gradually, but for some reason this drives our friends nuts! They're constantly offering us their old stuff, but I'm not sure they will take it back when we're back home full-time. They think I'm crazy because I don't want their old stuff; I want my new stuff as we can afford it. I've got a whole rental house full of our junk, don't need to add anyone else's to the pile.

 

[luvdisney00]

I have 3 girls and a few of their friends give me hand me downs for them. I always take them and let the girls go through the bags and then pass on to Goodwill what they don't want. 1 of my oldest DD's best friends shops only in Nordstoms and buys only designer clothes , and some of them still have tags on them. My middle DD is more than happy to take her hand me downs! I would be offended if someone wanted to give us dirty, stained or gross clothes, but for regular stuff that the kids outgrow quickly, why not? I'll take it and get rid of the things I don't need. When other family memebers try to give us junk we don't need (BIL does this) I just say "no thank you I can't use it and don't have room for it".

 

[powellrj]

We live in a really small house, but for some reason everyone in my family thinks I need their old junk! Most of it I thank them for, and then put in my trunk and drop it off at goodwill. I really don't need your 3 Santa cookie jars that you don't have room for!