Does anyone deal with a sarcastic person every day?

[ElizK]

Oh - I do find this person funny, we laugh all the time. I don't like the sarcasm when it's really a disguised 'dig' at something. Just because the dig is not at me, doesn't mean it's not a dig - I know the motives behind it. For instance - we have a family member that never goes outside - not afraid of the outdoors, just spends all day inside watching TV. So, a comment was made by person inside "Wow, the weather says rain today". Sarcastic dig was "Well you don't have to worry about that - the weather is always the same on the couch". Person on the couch became defensive. Yes, I chuckled at that, but it was still sarcasm, no? I can appreciate that humor - just not all the time.

That's not sarcasm. That's more passive-aggression. Ouch.

Yeah, I might know something about sarcasm. In my family, though, we prefer to call it being "verbally ironic". We try not to be mean or hateful, and usually are just teasing each other. Like when DD14 asked why DD17 got something she didn't.... we just told DD14 that it's because we love DD17 more. (And I've said the same thing to DD17 about DD14. All's fair in love and sarcasm.

 

[kimmar067]

"Does Anyone Deal with a Sarcastic Person Every Day?"
....a very close family member, that I see every day, is a sarcastic person and it really bothers me. I've brought it up beforet....he response I get is "I didn't realize I was being sarcastic - that's just the way I talk", or "How else am I supposed to say it?" etc. etc.....

....yes...no....sometimes.....what's it TO ya.......?

 

[kimmar067]

Sarcasm is just another service I offer.

,,,is it now?

...I said something to DD one day and she said, you hurt my feelings. I said, no I didn't, you're just like me -- you don't have any feelings.....

....wow, I had MINE surgically removed YEARS ago....

 

[kimmar067]

I have to share what my 13yodd said the other day. My family totally prepared me for middle school.

...that has GOT to be one of the funniest things that I have read on the DIS in a long time.... [...mebbe it's because I teach middle-school math...]

 

[Disney Doll]

I am an extremely sarcastic person, so is my grandma. Several people I encounter on a daily basis (related or not) don't understand my humor they think I'm being mean but to be fair I wouldn't understand their humor.

If "several" people you encounter on a daily basis don't understand your humor and think you're being mean, then you probably are being mean.

 

[FireDancer]

Oh - I do find this person funny, we laugh all the time. I don't like the sarcasm when it's really a disguised 'dig' at something. Just because the dig is not at me, doesn't mean it's not a dig - I know the motives behind it. For instance - we have a family member that never goes outside - not afraid of the outdoors, just spends all day inside watching TV. So, a comment was made by person inside "Wow, the weather says rain today". Sarcastic dig was "Well you don't have to worry about that - the weather is always the same on the couch". Person on the couch became defensive. Yes, I chuckled at that, but it was still sarcasm, no? I can appreciate that humor - just not all the time.

I'm not sure if that is technically sarcasm but it sure is funny. Truth is the perfect defense to anything that is said, even if it is mean.

A more sarcastic thing to say would be something like "I guess you'll have to cancel that 10 mile run again today". Sarcasm is as much about tone as it is about wording which is why it doesn't always come across when written.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

....yes...no....sometimes.....what's it TO ya.......?

It's survival of the fittest in the urban areas where sarcasm is a daily occurrence.

 

[a paper star]

Disney Doll I know that some people think I'm being mean when I'm being sarcastic. I guess I should have made it clearer in what I previously posted. But I wasn't expecting someone to comment on what I wrote because no one rarely does. But trust me my sarcasm and being mean are two different things. I can be worse when I am mean worse than being sarcastic. Maybe I am a mean person, I don't think I'm mean but a lot of people don't get me or my humor.

 

[klacey1]

It's survival of the fittest in the urban areas where sarcasm is a daily occurrence.

Absolutely! Not only did I grow up just outside of NYC, my father is an Irish immigrant. If I did not learn to deal with sarcasm, I would be eaten alive by my father, brother, uncles, etc. It's the the world I grew up in and subsequently has been the way of speaking that I have adopted. I don't mean to be hurtful, and when I see that I have offended someone, I always quickly apologize and explain that I don't mean to upset anyone. It's how I speak-- lightheartedly, etc. Honestly, if someone approached me and said they didn't appreciate my sarcasm, I'd probably slowly cut them out of my life. There are SO many worse things someone can do that speaking in a way that many find normal (and funny!). I would wonder why this person let me bother them so much.
OP, I think you just need to avoid this person. If you are letting them stress you out, it's not fair that you are starting to resent them just because of their manner of speech. As easy as it is to say (and as hard as it is to do), I think you need to focus on not letting them get under your skin! If you can't, like I said, just try to avoid their company. If you enjoy their company too much to do so, then you'll have to find a way to not let them bother you.

 

[NikitaZee]

Absolutely! Not only did I grow up just outside of NYC, my father is an Irish immigrant. If I did not learn to deal with sarcasm, I would be eaten alive by my father, brother, uncles, etc. It's the the world I grew up in and subsequently has been the way of speaking that I have adopted. I don't mean to be hurtful, and when I see that I have offended someone, I always quickly apologize and explain that I don't mean to upset anyone. It's how I speak-- lightheartedly, etc. Honestly, if someone approached me and said they didn't appreciate my sarcasm, I'd probably slowly cut them out of my life. There are SO many worse things someone can do that speaking in a way that many find normal (and funny!). I would wonder why this person let me bother them so much.
OP, I think you just need to avoid this person. If you are letting them stress you out, it's not fair that you are starting to resent them just because of their manner of speech. As easy as it is to say (and as hard as it is to do), I think you need to focus on not letting them get under your skin! If you can't, like I said, just try to avoid their company. If you enjoy their company too much to do so, then you'll have to find a way to not let them bother you.

Yeah - that's what I'm going to do. I've read thru all the replies, and while there are definitely posters who feel as I do and don't particularly enjoy constant sarcasm, I realize from other posters (self-described sarcastic people as well) that it's not meant to be hurtful, it's the way they normally communicate and it really can't be changed. I'm going to roll with it and take the advice of those folks who say not let it bug me.

BTW - a few posters have mentioned being from in and around NYC and sarcasm as a way of life there - I was born and raised right outside of NYC myself. We're not all that way!

 

[mking624]

I do enjoy sarcasm in jest...I use it, my DH uses it, and so on. But constant sarcasm is also annoying. If a person who has to constantly hear it is advised to change their attitude towards it, then a person who constantly speaks that way can also be advised to at times word things better. Sarcasm, like everything else, has it's time and place. OP, if it bothers you as a constant thing, don't be afraid to speak up and say "hey, I enjoy your humor, but would also love just some straight talk as well...no sarcasm." Perhaps offer to point out when things seem a little over the top if he or she doesn't realize what they're doing. How you come across in civil and polite conversation is important...perception is a lot different than intention and it's not really a bad thing to point out that while the intention may be harmless, the perception isn't very appealing. This is simply showing respect in communication. Everyone can change how they are with people, even those who constantly use sarcasm.

 

[scrapquitler]

Sarcasm is the main means of communication in my family, and in my extended family. Just normal for us, I suppose. I never realized that we were being sarcastic until I met my husbands parents and family...the don't even seem to understand sarcasm in any way. I had lots of problems with my in-laws because they saw it as rudeness on my part, and I didn't see it that way. To this day, I have to continually bite my tongue and NOT say the things that I want to and would if I were with my own family and friends...and despite my best efforts, they still seem to be offended all the time.

I think that you can choose to be offended by this persons sarcasm or not. You know that this is her nature, and you should maybe just ignore it.

 

[WeLoveLilo05]

yes....I have one...it's my fiance lol.