Do your kids use IM and which one do you use??

[mommystieg]

Our DD has been asking to use IM but DH is kinda hesitant (he is in law enforcement and is occasionally overly cautious). We are a little technologicaly challenged in this area so I was wondering what services are the best and what kinds of things do you have in place to protect your kids? We have some good virus protection and content watch software already installed, the computers are in the family room so we can keep an eye on them and DD#1 is kicked off the internet after 9:00 pm.

 

[horseshowmom]

This site was posted by another Dis member (in connection with the Dateline program that aired recently). It looks really good but doesn't pertain to IM'ing.

www.packet-level.com/kids/

 

[belle_of_the_ball]

teen here...i use aim...go on aim.com,go over to downloads and it will tell you what to do. My Nana can even do it!

My mom just makes sure im not being catty (as girls can be)

Just come in and check on your DD, most of the time I just talk to my friends about the cutie in bio or how stuipid gym is. THere are girls who do start drama. And also let her no about talking to ppl who she doesnt know. With aim a message pops up that says "accept message from user so-and-so" So if she doesnt recognize the name she shouldnt accept it unless she knows who it is. And if people get mean. Print out the IM and block them on aim. I have had to change my online name (make sure its different from your real name..mine wouldnt have erin..its something totally different)

good luck. Just trust her

 

[janette]

My DDs sometimes use AIM, I have a rule that they can only talk to people that they know IRL. Friends from school etc. You can also set the AIM so that they can receive messages only from people on their buddy list. They can add their friends to the list but they won't get messages from the general public.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

My kids also use AOL IM. My 12yo started when he was probably 10 or so. The kids use it like we used to use the telephone, except they hold several conversations at one time. At least they don't tie up our phone line like we used to do when we were kids.

 

[Megster]

I've used AOL IM since I was in 6th grade. It's probably the most popular IM service and its free! Its reallly easy to download and use!!

 

[PlutoPony]

Just installed AIM also.... DS 10 did most of the installation with dad watching (kids have an amazing amount of computer knowledge these days!). Hardest part was coming up with a unique ID or whatever it's called. Went thru the discussion that this is a priviledge that can be taken away if inappropriate words/discussions are used, have restrictions on how much time can be spent on it, and limit contact to those on his buddy list. We're still in the mode of knowing his friends and their parents pretty well, so hope this is a good year to start this. NEXT year with middle school and new friends could be more of a challenge however.... There's just so much more to growing up now (I feel so old ).... Good luck!

 

[mommystieg]

AIM is the one most of her friends use. Can you keep track of all the messages sent and received? DH thought this would be something that would help in case somebody started bullying/harassing DD through IM (he saw something about this happening on Dr. Phil)...

 

[WIcruizer]

#1 Rule for kids: Computer used in public areas of the home only. That should really be rules 2,3, and 4 also. It's that important. No matter what safeguards you have, thi sis the best way to monitor use, and for that matter limit use.

 

[belle_of_the_ball]

hmm dunno about definatly knowing but just poping in and out of the room. and asking her to tell you guys. She should always print out messages that have her being bullied. And she shouldnt reply to bullies online. There are programs to keep an eye on kids...but kids can figure them out.

 

[Straycat]

Besides going into the privacy settings and making sure to select the ' only allow users on my buddy list' option, make sure she knows that chat rooms are off limits.

Also double check the direct IM connection settings, they need to either be at don't allow or seek approval before allowing. This is for if someone wants to send her a picture/file, it would not allow it or she would have to say yes through a pop up before accepting the file.