Do you play "devil's advocate" on the Dis?

[snapppyd]

I really hope some of you are. I was surprised this week by a few threads where bad manners/behavior were defended. You really don't teach your children that it is polite to thank someone for a gift? Do you really tell them that if a person "expects" a thank you THEY have a problem?

 

[Auggietina]

I really hope some of you are. I was surprised this week by a few threads where bad manners/behavior were defended. You really don't teach your children that it is polite to thank someone for a gift? Do you really tell them that if a person "expects" a thank you THEY have a problem?

 

[goofyintoronto]

I really hope some of you are. I was surprised this week by a few threads where bad manners/behavior were defended. You really don't teach your children that it is polite to thank someone for a gift? Do you really tell them that if a person "expects" a thank you THEY have a problem?

Hmmmm wonder which thread this came from? Im gonna have to dig! lol.

But to answer your question, I always make sure my son thanks someone for a gift. He knows the consequences if he doesnt!

I know there are a lot of ppl on Dis who just to cause friction. Maybe they have nothing better to do? Lol.

 

[Disney Doll]

I don't play devil's advocate. I state my opinion.

With regard to thanking people for gifts, I think parents who don't teach their children to do so are doing their children a big disservice.

And as far as the reasons to buy someone a gift....well, yes, the reason I buy someone a gift is because I want to, but if it happens repeatedly that I am not getting a simple "thank you" in some form(verbal, text, email, note), I'm going to stop wanting to buy that person a gift.

 

[usnuzuloose]

I have always taught my children to say thank you. I also taught them that they need to respect people.

 

[snapppyd]

I have always taught my children to say thank you. I also taught them that they need to respect people.

Thank you

 

[JamieH]

I do as well and not only do we practice it but I also make them practice how to act if they receive something they already have

 

[Princess on the Run]

I truly believe there are a lot of people on this board who post things just to be argumentative. Whether they are just disgruntled lonely people desperate for human interaction, or truly that socially awkward, I don't know. I just know that for a board dedicated to Disney, there are an awful lot of mean, rude, judgmental, humorless, manner-less, opinionated...<insert more adjectives here>...people. I keep telling myself it isn't worth it to come back, or to just stick to the WISH section, but the pixie dust keeps pulling me back.

And yes, I say thank you. My children say thank you. I feel that thanking people is important.

 

[goofyintoronto]

I always wonder about the parents who do not teach their children to say thanks. The parents are right there when their kids open the gifts. They see their kids dont say thanks for the gift...yet they continue to ignore it. They dont rectify their rude behaviour. Why? Being rude is ok in their eyes i guess? I dont understand.

Same thing when we're in a movie theatre. One time a family of four sat in front of us. One kid is 8ish, the other 12ish. They are both talking quite loud, the 8 yr old is throwing a tantrum, yet the parents say NOTHING to the kids. They dont instruct them to be quiet, nothing. Absolutely nothing. The kids are causing a scene, yet the parents are mute. Im sitting there dumbfounded. Like really?

I honestly think some ppl should apply/write an exam before being a parent. LOL!

 

[Rylee]

No, I don't play devil's advocate. I don't get involved in many arguments on message boards, I state my opinion and move on. Honestly, I don't have the time or desire to pick a position and argue it just for the sake of debate.

When I see a thread where everyone is ganging up on a poster, for something that is truly not offensive, (no clear right or wrong) I will post telling that poster not to worry about what others think and to do what is right for them, even if it is something I wouldn't necessarily do. (Example - renting a stroller for a 5 y/o.) However, I don't get involved with trying to change the minds of others.

Also, if you are a regular here on the Dis, and are able to retain what you read, you know which posters play devil's advocate, which one like to get a rise out of people and go for shock value, who is wishy washy and agrees with every post they read, and those who are experts in everything. And some posters are either very moody and change their positions with the wind, or fall for mob mentality, because when the same subject comes up with very similar circumstances in different threads, they go along with what the opinion of the majority. (Example - family squabbles - I would never put up with that, stop being a doormat, doesn't matter if they're family, you should cut them out of your life, to a complete 180 of... It's family, you really need to make amends, is this the legacy you want to leave, etc.

Of course, then there's the rest of us, the majority, posters looking to connect with others with something in common, wanting to be heard, who enjoy learning about the lives and opinions of others.


As for manners, they are important to me, and I have taught my children well.

 

[snapppyd]

I truly believe there are a lot of people on this board who post things just to be argumentative. Whether they are just disgruntled lonely people desperate for human interaction, or truly that socially awkward, I don't know. I just know that for a board dedicated to Disney, there are an awful lot of mean, rude, judgmental, humorless, manner-less, opinionated...<insert more adjectives here>...people. I keep telling myself it isn't worth it to come back, or to just stick to the WISH section, but the pixie dust keeps pulling me back.

And yes, I say thank you. My children say thank you. I feel that thanking people is important.

I think what I see are a lot of people who took a psychology course in college and now feel the need to analyze random strangers on a message board.

 

[JennaDeeDooDah]

I'm hoping that some people are playing Devil's Advocate on these boards. I started a thread on the planning board about a kid who threw up all over himself and the sidewalk while waiting for the parade to start during MVMCP. His parents kind of wiped him down like you would a child who dropped food on his shirt, threw a poncho over the vomit puddle, and they all just sat there - smelling of vomit. It was less than pleasant for those of us around him. Most people on the thread agreed that he should have been cleaned up better, possibly have left, and that it is inconsiderate to the people around them to have to smell vomit during the parade and the 20 minutes leading up to the parade. Then, there were other people who said that everyone who was bothered by the smell should have been the ones to move - not the family who smelled of vomit - and that we should have volunteered to help clean up the child.

 

[cluvsdisney]

I really hope some of you are. I was surprised this week by a few threads where bad manners/behavior were defended. You really don't teach your children that it is polite to thank someone for a gift? Do you really tell them that if a person "expects" a thank you THEY have a problem?

On another message board I used to read, there were a group of moms who said they were not going to teach their children to say please, thank you, etc. It was something they were going to let their kids learn by example instead of through forced repetition. I wondered if that's the method they were going to use for potty training.

 

[happygirl]

I tell it like I see it good or bad.

I expect for my kids to say please and thank you always. I don't get upset or mad if someone doesn't tell me thank you. Or threaten to withhold gifts

 

[PeterPanic]

On another message board I used to read, there were a group of moms who said they were not going to teach their children to say please, thank you, etc. It was something they were going to let their kids learn by example instead of through forced repetition. I wondered if that's the method they were going to use for potty training.

They sure do! I know some one that has a child that is over three years old and is still not potty trained. They tried once and the young lady held it in for over 12 hours rather then use the potty. She was in pain, crying and still not willing to do what was needed. My friend called the Doctor and the Doctor went ballistic...put a diaper on her was the advice.

I guess I understand the concern of the both the parents and the Doctor, but if a child has that much control of their bodily functions that they can literally hold it for hours out of stubbornness, I'm sorry but she was controlling more then the one thing.

I also understand relenting at that point, but you can bet your bottom dollar that we would have been doing the same routine the next day and the next day until the message finally got through that this was not worth it to them to resist. They have not even tried since that incident. She goes to pre-school now and they thought that pressure from her friends might take care of the problem, it has not.

She does say Thank you, so she's got that going for her.

Interesting/funny side note: When I typed in pre-school spell check kicked in and one of the suggested alternatives was "pee-school". How did it know?

 

[goofyintoronto]

They sure do! I know some one that has a child that is over three years old and is still not potty trained. They tried once and the young lady held it in for over 12 hours rather then use the potty. She was in pain, crying and still not willing to do what was needed. My friend called the Doctor and the Doctor went ballistic...put a diaper on her was the advice.

I guess I understand the concern of the both the parents and the Doctor, but if a child has that much control of their bodily functions that they can literally hold it for hours out of stubbornness, I'm sorry but she was controlling more then the one thing.

I can relate to this. My niece was potty trained at the AGE OF FIVE! Yes you read that right, FIVE! I blame the mother, she was too lazy to potty train her kid properly. My niece was just as stubborn, she'd hold it in. So my sister would cave and slap a diaper on her. Unreal!

Interesting/funny side note: When I typed in pre-school spell check kicked in and one of the suggested alternatives was "pee-school". How did it know?

ahahahahahaha! Gotta love technology.

 

[Sparkly]

I apparently wasn't toilet trained (potty trained) until I was four! Luckily I was still in nursery school!

 

[Casemily]

I certainly don't do it on purpose if I do. But then, maybe I read more into someone's question than I should. People come from different backgrounds, not that I agree with how people act/react to things, but I do try to look at it from more than just my point of view.

In my family we were taught to say please and thank you, it's important to be polite and respectful. But there are adults who grew up in homes where it wasn't important and/or it was used to get something.

If I'm given the wrong change in the drive thru, I return it. But I worked with someone who, when given an extra 20 at the bank, took it and left quickly. Her mentality was, it was on the teller that she got an extra 20. No way could I do that, it's stealing, that could be someone's job! She didn't see it that way.

 

[FergieTCat]

I guess then, I have a problem. It's common courtesy to say "Please" and "Thank you". I have discovered, however, that saying "Excuse Me" and/or holding open the door for the person directly behind you appears to be a thing of the past.

As for the Dis, I state my opinion. I do think some of my fellow Dis-ers find it easy to be insulting when they are hiding behind the safety of their keyboards.

 

[Casemily]

On another message board I used to read, there were a group of moms who said they were not going to teach their children to say please, thank you, etc. It was something they were going to let their kids learn by example instead of through forced repetition. I wondered if that's the method they were going to use for potty training.

I know someone who didn't want to gender bias their child so they didn't use he/she. At 6 the child realized that he wasn't a dog and they family dog wasn't his sibling. Lucky for him, I think, the town he grew up in is very accepting of non mainstream social mores in general.