Do you open your SO's mail?

[buzzlady]

I too open ALL the mail. If I didn't open it, it would never get opened.

 

[katerkat]

Originally posted by DonnaS
Any tips on programming my DH to order the stuff himself. Usually, if I tell him something I want, I have to order it myself (at his request).

I told him what I wanted, then bookmarked and showed him the site to order it from. Actually, I'm utterly shocked that he already ordered it - that's kind of why I wasn't thinking when I opened the package. After all, my birthday's not till next week - his normal MO is to order it the day after!

The good news is he got home, saw the (resealed) package and hid it. So if I didn't open it, I'd know it was a present for me! LOL!

 

[Beauty]

Yep, I open all of the mail, John wouldn't know what to do with it anyway...LOL!

 

[jipsy]

Yes, but only because he asked me a long time ago to do so. He doesn't like bill paying or dealing with that kind of stuff, and I don't mind it. If it looks like a personal letter or card or something, then I will set it to the side without opening it and make sure he sees it. But I organize all the bills, etc. Every Sunday night I make him sit down and pay his bills.

 

[cgcw]

Another opener here. Sometimes, DH will get to it first and then sort through what he thinks is important (the junk mail) and leave the "real" mail for me. DH likes to look through the coupons and clip what he thinks we'll use. Usually I toss them right out. I leave any cards and things that I don't care to open (like from groups he's involved with and such). I have no need/desire to open those things. But, I pay all of the bills and if I counted on him to take care of the important mail, we'd be living in the street.

 

[DonnaS]

Originally posted by katerkat
I told him what I wanted, then bookmarked and showed him the site to order it from.

This is the point where he asks me to "just order it" as he's afraid he'll "order the wrong one" even when I've circled item, color, size, etc. LOL

 

[Jenzebelle]

I open his mail all of the time. DH normally gets the mail and leaves it on the table for me. It drives me nuts because it could be something important that needs to be taken care of during the day while he's home and I'm at work.

I don't usually look at the addressee on the envelope - I just open it.

 

[jwsqrdplus2]

Originally posted by katerkat
I told him what I wanted, then bookmarked and showed him the site to order it from. Actually, I'm utterly shocked that he already ordered it - that's kind of why I wasn't thinking when I opened the package. After all, my birthday's not till next week - his normal MO is to order it the day after!

The good news is he got home, saw the (resealed) package and hid it. So if I didn't open it, I'd know it was a present for me! LOL!

Way to go Kate. Practice your surprised look for next week. BTW, when is your B-day??

 

[browneyes]

The only pieces of mail that I open that has his name on it are the bills because I'm the one that pays them. If I wait for him to open them, he'll put them anywhere and they'd get lost. I don't open his mail (not even a magazine with his name on it-the only one he gets now is a Honda motorcycle mag). He rarely opens my mail.

 

[Tiiiigergirl]

We will open each other's mail. But this is with a discussion when we first married. We talked about whether or not this was an infringement and both agreed that it wasn't a big deal. I don't think it is so much that there is a right or wrong as much as what both agree to and what is comfortable. Now if he intentially ripped up something (see the other post) oohh would I let him have it!

 

[Dan Murphy]

Nope, only the addressee opens their mail here. Whoever gets the mail sorts it into four slots in the foyer divider, but never open other than their own.

 

[FreshTressa]

Whoever gets the mail opens it. Not a big deal at all. I usually leave packages though.

 

[disykat]

Since dh works full time and I do not, I deal with all the bills and the junk mail. Dh appreciates not having to come home to another in-box. If it looks unfamiliar, personal, or official I do save it for him. I don't open packages unless I'm expecting something - mainly because dh orders on-line all the time and it irritates me. I'll let him deal with the cardboard.

Most of our accounts tend to end up in his name unless I am very specific to use my name only. Otherwise mine gets listed second or not at all. I was recently irritated when I bought a vacuum at Sears and they called for dh to tell him it was in - not only was I the one who bought it and paid for it, but I answered the phone!

 

[CyranoJones]

I open all the mail unless it's a birthday card or something I know is work-related for him, like professional license forms. He brings those to his office and has his manager open it for him, lol. If I do leave something for him to open, it will sit on the desk until I have to open it to see if it's anything he needs. He just can't be bothered with "paperwork" at home.

And it's not as if we have anything to hide from each other after all these years.

 

[Disney845]

I always got and opened all the mail with my ex. He worked long hours and was often out of town on business. I ran the home, including paying the bills and what-not so it made sense for me to open it. Ex would let it sit forever until it eventually got lost if I had left it up to him. I would open everything, and then the bills I would put in the proper place for myself to take care of and personal things such as birthday cards, information on any of the umpteen billion frequent flyer/hotel/car rental clubs he belonged to and other things of that nature would be set aside and I would remind him to look at them and file them or throw out what he didn't want. I also opened packages that came to the house. Anything that he wouldn't have wanted me to see he would have had sent to the office (but then he usually didn't plan ahead for presents so he would rarely have needed to do this ). Of course I had access to the online banking account as well as his work credit cards so he would have had to be extremely sneaky to have hid something he bought for me anyway. In our house it wasn't a matter of privacy, it was a matter of who was actually at the house (and would bother) to open and sort through the mail.

 

[wdwnutze]

Since I am home during the day and dh is at work, I get the mail and open anything that is a bill. I also throw away all the junk mail. I leave anything personal or not bill related for him.

 

[believe]

Bills and junk mail I open. Things that look personal (cards/packages) I do not open. If we are on the phone I will ask him if he wants me to open it.

 

[FOJMO]

Originally posted by katerkat
Like the letter from the state of PA, I opened it, found out it was for his jury duty, and organized the papers so he knew who to call to get out of it.

More disturbing than opening your DH's mail (which is just not quite "kosher") is assuming that he wants to "get out" of jury duty.

And if he does want to, why? That's the part that bothers me...

 

[powellrj]

we use to open our own mail until he would open bills and forget where he put them and then I would have to go look for them, now I open all the bills and important mail, and I leave him a pile with cards and anything he might be interested in.

 

[Beth E. (NJ)]

Unless it is blatently junkmail, than I don't open DH's mail. He doesn't open mine either. I will make a pile of his and leave it for him.

I do sometimes open the kids mail. My kids are 8 and 4 1/2 so when they get mail I like to make sure of what it is before I give it to them. They get stuff from local stores and I like to weed out the things I know we cannot do so they are not disappointed.