Do you let your young kids play Rated M games--or am I out of touch?

[luvmydogs]

Yesterday ds8 was off from school because of snow and ended up going to a neighbor's house to play for a while. We've known this family for about five years (although we're not close friends), and our kids play together often--their son is seven. When he came home, he was real quiet for a while and finally said that he had something to tell me. He said that they had been playing rated M games on their family's playstation even though he knows he's only allowed "E for everyone" games on his gameboy. (We don't have a playstation). He said he was embarrassed telling his friend he wasn't allowed to play these kinds of games. Told him I understood that, was glad that he told me the truth and wasn't angry with him, but told him I was disappointed that he did it knowing full well that it's against our family's rules. We had a long talk about accountability and peer pressure and he spent the rest of the day in his room. I know it's not a super-serious offense or anything, but I did want him to take away a bit of a lesson from this. I also asked him about the content of the game: Cop-killing, alcohol, the "F" word, etc...Now, I know I'm a fairly strict parent, and maybe a bit behind the times, but is it common for parents to allow their 7 year old to play these kinds of games? Ds's friend is an only child, so it's not like he got into an older sibling's stash. Ds said friend's mom checked on them every once in a while, so she had to be aware of what they were playing. I do not want to turn this into a debate on good/bad parenting. Our neighbors are nice people, and their son's a great kid from what we know. I just wanted your opinions--am I just out of touch? Would you be surprised that kids this young are playing "games" like this? I hope I haven't offended anyone.

 

[TimeforMe]

Unfortunately it is "common" for kids this age to be playing these games. Do I think it is appropriate? Absolutely not. My DS is 14 and I still don't allow him to buy or rent "M" games, although when he goes to a friend's house, I'm sure they play them. I still monitor what he watches on TV and what kind of music he listens to. Unfortunately not all parents do, however.

You let him know the deal. I think it is extremely admirable (and a good reflection on how you're raising him) that he told you. He really didn't need to and you would've been none the wiser. Good luck.

 

[TZMOM]

I wouldn't worry about it - it sounds like you've got a very good basis for communication started with him.

If Janet Jackson's boob didn't permanently scar him like it seemed to do to so many others, I don't think that a few make believe video games would do any harm. I actually think that some of the cartoons on Nick & Cartoon Network, while not violent, are unbelievably mean spirited. I'm sure I'm in the minority about this one though.

I just think that you need to keep the communication w/your kids going all the time and be up their you know whats until you think they're "getting it." I'm a single parent with only one child so if I'd made the decision to have more, I may have felt differently. It's easier with only one to commit my total effort & time to him.

Hope I didn't offend anyone either.

 

[mom2boys]

I don't think you are out of touch. My boys are 8 1/2 & 10. They are allowed rated E games & certain rated T games - animated violance & that sort of thing I will allow - but not the more realistic blood & guts, definitely not sexually suggestive (or whatever they call it). Definitely not M - they ask when they can play M games & I tell them when they are 18 like the cover says. (Now I realize that by the time they hit their mid-late teens that might not be practical but I'll deal with that when the time comes.)
You are doing right by your son. Kids need & want guidelines. Of course, saying this to you is preaching to the choir.

Stay strong!

 

[dturner]

DS (7) and DH are video game fanatics. DS does play M rated games but not all of them (i.e.: DS can't play the one where the hookers and drugs are in it=the Vice City games or the XXX Motorcross or whatever that one is called), he is also supervised by someone while playing these games. One of DS favorite games is Halo (I think it's rated M) but DH plays with him.

I leave it up to DH to know/monitor which games are ok and which games are not.

 

[Planogirl]

Our 11 year old has played games for years but I don't allow any M rated games. When we rent at Blockbuster, he automatically bypasses those games and searches through the Teen rated stuff most of which I consider OK.

I agree that your son is to be commended for telling you. I wonder if most kids would do so.

 

[Mimi Q]

My 11 yo DD is not allowed to play T or M games.

 

[Michelemouse]

DS8 is not allowed to play the M-rated games. Period. No question about it. To be honest he has never shown interest in them so it hasn't been an issue.

I equate game ratings to movie ratings. E-rated games are the same as PG/G-rated films, content-wise. T-rated games are the same as PG-13 rated films and M-rated games are equal to R-rated films. There is absolutely no way my 8yo would be watching an R-rated film so no M-rated games.

We just recently allowed him to get the Lord of the Rings games which are rated T, but only after renting them first and having DH play them to check the content. They were no worse than the films, which he has seen, so we okayed them.

 

[DoeWDW]

DS 16 still has to check with me to play a T-rated game. Yes, I am pretty protective. I generally watch him play for a while and we decide together if it is or isn't appropriate. Most of the T-rated games pass our test and he is allowed to play them, but we decide on a case-by-case basis.

He has not even ASKED to rent or buy an M-rated game.

 

[gymnasticsmom68]

Cop-killing, alcohol, the "F" word, etc..

Absolutely not!!

 

[CookieGVB]

I only recently started allowing DSs to play T rated games, and they're 10 and 12.

Nope - no M - not in my house.

 

[padams]

DS 8 is only allowed to play E games- no T or M. He went home with a classmate to play last year. When DH went to pick him up, the boys were playing a M game (sounds like the same game your son played). We told DS that he couldn't go to that house again.

 

[Mom-to-3]

"E" only at our house. The kids are 14,12, and 9.

I remember reading about one of the vice-type games. If you killed the prostitute after you were done, you didn't have to pay her!

 

[Twigs]

You are not out of touch. DS's are 11 and I do not let them play M rated games, I let them play certain T rated games, but I check them out first. I know that they may at someones house, but they do know how I feel about it. There are some people who don't seem to care what their kids play. I have 2 nephews (not in the same household) who both have been playing M games since they were 4 or 5, I just don't get it. whenever my MIL comments how good my kids are, I point that out as reason they are not wild and out of control.

 

[Cindy B]

I allow E games in the house, along with very select few T games.

The T games we have are Star Wars and Tony Hawks Skateboarder. Star Wars has animated voilence (ie lightsabers, etc.), and Tony Hawk has blood (small amount) when you fall off the skateboard.

My DH doesn't have any M games either!

 

[cgcw]

Not in our house. We just recently started allowing DS9 to play T games.

 

[dizny4us]

Another house without "M" games. DS (11) and DH play the "E" games. DH and I will preview the games that are rated "T" to see if they are ok for our son. DH rented the Vice City game just to see what it what like...he turned it off after just 5 minutes! The violence was unbelievable!!

 

[swanmom]

No, I don't allow it for 10 year old DD. We pretty strict about what she sess at home. But we faced this situation before (also had it happen with movies rated R that friend's were going to watch at their house) and she had the same reaction that your DS had...... "I was embarrassed to say my mom said no." I discussed strategies for DD to use if faced with this situation again. We decided what she would do if she got in an incomfortable situation at a friend's house and couldn't tell them herself. Our plan is for her to say that she had promised to call home at a particular time to check in. Then, while on the phone, she can use the code phrase"Yea, I'm fine but my shoes are uncomfortable. (This way the other kids don't know what she calling about.) If she uses that phrase, it means I should call the other parent privately and straighten things out. We've only used this plan once or twice but it's been a godsend!

 

[zurgswife]

We have only allowed E up until recently when my 11 year old was allowed to have only preapproved "T" games

Saying this I must state that I am also very amazed at the families that I come acrossed that consistantly allow "M" games in the house.....Some were families that in certain instances are over protective but when it comes to games....they are off there rocker as far as I'm concerned....

 

[mcnuss]

Absolutely no M or T for my 9 yo DD.

No R movies, either.