Do you keep a "funeral outfit" on hand?

[PollyannaMom]

My condolences to your family. It’s tough to lose someone at any time, but even tougher right now to organize everything than it would normally be.

Do you keep an outfit ready in case of a funeral?

Yes, I do make sure I’ve always got something in my closet that would be appropriate, both for warm and cold weather.

 

[NannyBeBe]

I feel that everyone should have an outfit appropriate for occasions like funeral and weddings.
I have a navy blue long skirt and navy top that I wore to my granddaughter's memorial and keep for such occasions. I also have clothes appropriate for weddings, fancy dinners, etc.
And I always have black and white clothes, because black and white is always right.
I also have a "go bag" always packed, which is a backpack with everything I would need for a night or two.

 

[bookgirl]

We went from planning to move my FIL in with us to planning his funeral in a matter of weeks. Even though it will necessarily be a very understated event with very few attendees, it's important to my husband that we all dress the part. DH of course already owns a couple black suits, but I've been scrambling to put together appropriate outfits for the kids and me. My son lives in basketball shorts and flip flops and needed everything, and while my daughter's wardrobe is mostly blacks and grays already, nothing was of an appropriate style. I had a few things that could've worked, but DH wants us all looking our best so I got myself new clothes as well. It's been kind of a mad flurry of shopping (which I hate) when there's already a lot of other stuff I need to be attending to.

I'm not getting caught in this situation again. Our parents, aunts, and uncles are getting to the age where we need to be ready for a funeral at any time, and I'm keeping outfits for all of us at the ready from here on out.

Do you keep an outfit ready in case of a funeral?

I'm sorry for your loss. I know that stuff like that can throw you for a loop and then having to figure out clothing is just one more item that seems overwhelming.

I like seperates. So I own a gray and a black skirt in classic A line style as well as basic straight leg slacks in gray and black (I used to have tan/kahki but I don't currently) and these can be paried with a number of items (short sleeve/long sleeve, sweater, jackets, jewelry, scarfs, heels, boots, flats, etc) so that they will work in the office, for weddings, funerals, or really anything. I do have other stuff but the honest truth is that if you stick to a few items with basic styles and neutral colors you can add stuff to meet just about any occassion.

That being said I live in a state that is more relaxed than most metropolitan areas and a lot of my family/friends are rural and a nice pair of pressed jeans is not uncommon at a funeral. I almost always wear at least leggings or slacks but in truth I have to adjust more for weddings than funerals.

 

[RUDisney]

This got me to thinking about my sister's funeral. When she passed, her DS was 7. He is another child that lives in basketball shorts and t-shirts. My BIL said he could wear khakis and a golf shirt, because he did own those at the time.

The rest of the family vetoed my BIL's decision. My Mom and I took him to the mall and bought him a little boy's suit. It wasn't hard to find and it wasn't expensive.

For anyone else, he'd have worn the khakis and polo... if he went at all at age 7. However, for his own mother's funeral, we thought he should be more dressed up. My BIL was very happy that he overruled him.

My Mom always wears happy colors to a funeral. It's a celebration of the deceased's life, after all. But, to her DD's, she insisted on purchasing two black dresses. We bought them the same day that we bought my nephews suit.

 

[Heigh-Ho]

Oh.. I don't know how you got "social admonishment" from what I said or why you were so offended by my opinion -and not any others ... but I sure hope the rest of your day gets better!!

I'm not offended at all, just commenting about your comment. My day is going swimmingly, as it was before I responded to your comment, as it now but thanks for your interest in how my day was going.

No one else brought up 'investment in one's self' combined with always having something nice that fits well. Sorry but the way you worded it comes off in a not so nice way. Guessing by some reactions others took it that way too

Enjoy your day!

 

[Snowysmom]

I make sure I have an outfit that I can wear for various occasions such as interviews, funerals, etc. I have black and navy pants along with some appropriate tops and shoes for whatever comes up. DH has a dark gray suit and black dress shoes so he is all set.

 

[chickapin parterre]

....for the first time my wife has looked at this site....she is always asking what is hanging in that black plastic , floor length bag in the garage.

 

[kirstenb1]

I"m so sorry for your loss! My FIL died very suddenly 2 years ago, and we wore whatever dark clothes we all had. The children were dressed more casually than dh and I. Because of that overwhelming suddenness and sadness, I did go out and carefully select some black clothes for different seasons. I realized I never wanted to have to worry needlessly about how we were dressed ever again.

 

[mom2rtk]

OP, I'm so sorry for your family's loss.

My son's friend lost his dad in high school. There were 4 kids in the family, and I just remember thinking how hard it must have been for that mom to put together funeral attire for herself and all 4 kids. They were in mourning, but out shopping for clothes. When they're still growing, it's really pointless to have things "on hand".

I'm always covered. I used to be a drug rep and for whatever reason they always wear black, so I invested in a bunch of classic black separates. Some of them still fit.

 

[RedAngie]

Like others have mentioned, I don’t have “funeral specific” clothing but I have plenty of items that would be appropriate.

DH has six or seven suits so he’s ready too.

At my uncle's funeral in February, my aunt wore red, his favorite color for her.

About 10 years ago, at the funeral for a close co-worker’s husband, there was a request to wear something red, his favorite color. I wore a red blouse and black slacks.

 

[Micca]

I have almost no dress up clothes, it’s just not me.
The funerals I’ve attended have mostly been very informal, people aren’t there to see me, they are there to out of respect for the friends and family of the deceased. I don’t think think I look sloppy, but it’s only vaguely dressy. If I thought I would offend anyone with my clothing, I’d skip the service and send some flowers. FWIW I’m usually not the most casually dressed at these occasions.

I also want to send my condolences to 1goldensun. I saw your thread about moving your FIL into your home. I’m so sorry for your loss.

 

[kymom99]

Every time one if our parents started declining, my husband would pull out dress shirts for me to take to the cleaner. I usually had to buy something new except when my mother in law passed. She was the last. I wore black pants and a blouse.

 

[ronandannette]

I have some nice outfits, but I don't specifically have a funeral outfit. At the funerals I've to been only some people are wearing black, and many people aren't even dressed up.

@1GoldenSun - my deepest sympathy. No matter what your age, or theirs, losing a parent is life-altering.

I've definitely got enough of everything to manage any occasion, as does DH. Funny thing though, when it's your own close loved one, there's a compulsion to "dial it up a notch" even though the memorial event may not be terribly formal and you don't care what anybody else wears. I very much understand the OP's desire in this case.

I got a new outfit for the funerals of each of our parents when they passed away - it just felt right. They were all quite nice but I'm pretty sure I've never worn any of them again. When my BFF buried her sons, not only did she get a new outfit, she threw it in the garbage that night because she recoiled at the thought of wearing it again, and couldn't even bear the idea of seeing it in the closet.

 

[disneychrista]

No I don't. I haven't been to a funeral since my Grandmother died in 1994.

 

[low-key]

Evevry man should have a black sports jacket in his closet

 

[DisneyTeacher]

My husband has a couple of black suits so he’s always ready. I have 3-4 dark dresses/skirts and tops that are suited for a funeral. Both of our parents are the youngest of their siblings so between the two of us we have lost lots of aunts and uncles in the last few years. In fact, last year my husband lost three in three months.

The harder part for me was shopping for an outfit to bury my mom in. I couldn’t find find anything in her closet that seemed appropriate so I had to go buy something. That was rough.

 

[disykat]

I always keep a black skirt than I can pair with something suitable. I actually have several sizes because it's been such a wardrobe staple over many years. I hadn't really thought about it when I travel back and forth to my parent's house. I usually go there prepared to stay a while if needed, but I honestly hadn't thought about taking my skirt, etc. so I'd have something to wear to a funeral. I guess I figured DH would bring me something if the worst happened. Now I'm realizing that the likelihood he'd bring the one I wanted is probably not good. I also need to be prepared if one of their friends passes while I'm there and DH probably wouldn't travel down for those funerals. I'm glad I read this thread, because I'm going to start being a little more prepared.

DH has a suit. His old one was getting too small and I kept kind of nagging at him to get a new one in case of a funeral, but he finally got a new one when our oldest son got married so he's set again. (He sometimes wears dress slacks to work or church, but never a suit.) When my boys were little they always had a pair of nicer pants for church. Starting in 5th grade they needed black dress slacks, dress shirt, and dark shoes for band, and then we always bought them a suit (or traded with a group of my friends who all had kids in that age group) rather than renting tuxes for dances. Now they do the same as groomsmen in weddings, so they've always been prepared.

 

[mumto3girls]

I typically have something in my closet that I can wear. Both of my parents-in-law have passed in the last 5 years and I bought new things each time. I felt like I needed to be a bit more dressed up for those than I would for someone not as closely related and I needed to have 2 outfits for the 2 days. DH has a few suits although for his mother’s last year he struggled a bit to get the neck button done on his shirt. The kids are the most difficult—still growing. I definitely had to shop for them.

 

[elphaba91]

My grandfather lived to 95 and had a few health scares so when I was younger my Mum always made sure that we had appropriate funeral outfits ready. Now I have several things in my wardrobe that would be suitable for a funeral.

When my sister passed the family requested that everyone wear yellow, her favorite color. I think more people had to shop for the cheerful color than if they were going to a funeral where somber colors were the norm. This was before Covid. Sure hope no one else passes before we have to make the difficult choice of whether to attend a funeral (huge family) or postpone, or stay home.

For my sister’s funeral we asked everyone to wear a touch of pink (and no black). I also went to a funeral for a little boy where everyone was asked to wear something superhero-themed; we did have to go shopping for that one as I think we only had one shirt between the three of us.

 

[disneyfanlincoln]

This thread has got me thinking. I have a funeral Specific blouse last worn in 2016 when my MIL and gran died. DH has a black suit so he’s ok but we’d have to go shopping for DD, I don’t think she has an outfit because until recently she was too young to go to the funerals. (I don’t think there’s an age limit it was just not appropriate for her at the time) sadly there’s a possibility that my father could die in the near future so I guess I better find something she could wear now, so I don’t have to think about it at the time, they’ll be so much to sort out...