Do you have a teen who is afraid to stay alone?

[iivye]

My 14 yo doesn't mind but she is also an only child so she spends plenty of time by herself in her room. If we will be out late at night for an event she doesn't want to attend, I will give her the option to spend the night with the grandparents which she will sometimes choose. When she doesn't have school she will stay home by herself. I think I worry about her being by herself more than she does. We also have a dog so maybe she doesn't feel totally alone.

 

[BLAZEY]

I started baby sitting at 12, DD8 and hasn't been left alone yet, but I know she can't wait to be. She has been left as the only one awake in the house as DH works weird hours and will be asleep while DD is up and awake. My mum left me alone at home for 4 day's to take my sister to a competition. I was fine. My grandparents were a phonecall and 5 min drive away if needed.

 

[Happyinwonerland]

I'venever liked being completely home alone. I'm in my 30's and I still hate being by myself, especially at night. I like the comfort and security of having other people around. Some people are just wired that way!

 

[Happyinwonerland]

I started baby sitting at 12, DD8 and hasn't been left alone yet, but I know she can't wait to be. She has been left as the only one awake in the house as DH works weird hours and will be asleep while DD is up and awake. My mum left me alone at home for 4 day's to take my sister to a competition. I was fine. My grandparents were a phonecall and 5 min drive away if needed.

how old were you?

 

[Lilacs4Me]

My kids have no problem staying home alone. They are 17 (senior), 13 (8th grade), and 11 (6th grade). They have all stayed alone during the say, after school, and in the evening. DS11 will occassionally not want to go to his brother's HS football game so he stays alone from about 6pm-10:30pm on those friday nights. He couldn't care less about being in the house by himself. As a matter of fact, I think he enjoys being able to raid the pantry and fridge, and the peace and quiet he gets.

I, on the other hand, have no problem in the daytime, but I HATE being alone at night. If DH is away overnight, I will sleep on the couch so I don't have to go into my bedroom alone. It's scary! LOL I swear we have a ghost in our house. When the kids were little, I used to make them sleep with me when DH was gone.

 

[laughinplace199]

This thread is 11 years old. I'm sure the OP's DD is fine by now.

 

[mjkacmom]

This thread is 11 years old. I'm sure the OP's DD is fine by now.

But the poster who bumped it up is having the same issue. All 5 of my kids started staying home alone for an hour or two around 10. Dd16 and dd14 were more cautious, so when I would give them the option of staying home or running a 10 minute errand with me, around 8 or so, they’d opt to come with me. The other 3 always opted to stay home alone. I have a friend who lets her 14 year old twins stay home together for the weekend, ds14 would be fine with that, dd14 and dd16 probably wouldn’t. Ds19 and dd21 would have loved it!

Dd16 is my most cautious child, so I make sure to make her go out of her comfort zone, since she’ll be away at college in two years. She’s run home more than a few times with tales of suspicious men driving by her, at least I know she’s paying attention!

 

[LongLiveRafiki]

I never had a problem with it as a teen. From the time I was around 14, I babysat my nieces and nephews overnight and didn't have a phone. Now, I hate being alone with my kids at night. I'm fine by myself, but having the kids here too without DH makes me more anxious. My 17 yo brother doesn't like being home alone at night and has never been home alone past maybe 10 or 11 pm. I think it really just depends on the kid and their comfort zone.

 

[Hikergirl]

My oldest does like to have the dog with her if she is spending the night here alone.
M ds 16 doesn't have any issue spending the night here alone.
My youngest hasn't spent the night alone and I don't think he'd be comfortable doing it.
None of them have any issues being alone during the day or evening here alone.

 

[momto2girls]

My oldest daughter is 17 and she just recently started being okay with being home alone at night. My 14 year old is okay staying home in the daytime, but not at night. We do have a really large house though, so I understand how it can be intimidating. Having an alarm system helps though.

Staying home alone at night never bothered me when I was a teen. I was babysitting at night until 12:00-1:00 am when I was 13-14.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

No, DD17 & DD12 don't mind being home alone. Driving alone to anywhere DD17 isn't 100% familiar is another thing though.

 

[lifesavacation]

I don't think it's unusual. Our neighbors left their 14 year old home alone the other weekend for a few hours. Something freaked him out so he came over to our house until they got back.

 

[jevs]

No. My guys are all good with being home alone, although there are usually 2 or more of them at home.

 

[design_mom]

My youngest is 13. She doesn't like to stay at home alone, especially at night (but not really ever). She will if there's no other choice, but if there's another option (coming with us, going to someone else's house) she'll usually choose not to stay alone, even if she'll be bored to tears. If her older brother is going to be home, then it's "see ya! I'll stay here." My son is 17 and he's never had an issue staying alone.

Someone up thread said they think it's an issue that generally affects younger children (birth order, not age) more than older ones. I think it's partially that, and partially personality... but it has been true for both my younger sister, and my kids. Neither my sister nor my youngest are phobic (they can/will stay home alone if there's no other option), but they'll choose the not-home-alone option even when I would not.

 

[aprilgail]

My daughter started babysitting at 12 and that is when she started staying home alone for evenings- she was not crazy about being home alone (though if there was a 2 year old she was home alone with while babysitting that made it better LOL)- but she did it because she had no choice- she would set the alarm as soon as I left and had the panic button on a string around her neck. The only issue we ever had was someone was banging on the front door and kept at it for awhile, she called me and I put in a call to my neighbor and he went outside to see what the person was doing there (just a persistent solicitor).

 

[eeyoreandtink]

My DD13 doesn't mind. At her age I was babysitting 3 kids under 5 at night.

 

[BLAZEY]

how old were you?

Age 16.

 

[clori]

My 13 year old daughter loves being home alone until she wants to go to sleep. However she has a 13 year old friend who does not want to be home alone ever even for a few minutes. This summer there were days when her camp ending at 3 and her parents getting home at 5pm that my 17 year old picked her up. If it where my kid dropping her off at home would have been fine but not her friend. As long as either my 13 year old or 17 year old stayed until a parent got home it didn't matter and yes it could have been a two year old. The same girl lives about 1 mile from the subway which her mother takes to/from work. She won't stay home alone even for her father to pick her mother up (when she is waiting) and coming right back home during daylight. The girl was adopted from a Chinese orphanage at 1 and they think that she was so used to having crowds of people around she feels uncomfortable being alone.

 

[aprilgail]

My mum left me alone at home for 4 day's to take my sister to a competition. I was fine. My grandparents were a phonecall and 5 min drive away if needed.

My mom and dad went away to Barbados for 5 days when I was 15 and my brother was 17- I loved it! My mom never worked so she was ALWAYS there in the house, it was SO nice to have some time in my house without her there, in fact I took off from school and just hung out for 2 of the days (they were gone Thurs, Fri, Sat, Sun,Mon). They left us a bunch of money in case we needed anything and my aunts and uncles lived about 15 minutes away in case of an emergency.

 

[mousefanmichelle]

My kids were always fine being home alone but I have a little different problem now that they are older. How old is old enough to be left home alone for a week? Both of my sons moved out now and our dd will be 19 when we want to go on a cruise next year. She says she will be fine home alone for 10 days and I am freaking out a little bit about it. If one of my sons were there with her I would be fine but her alone...worries me. It's not like she can get intouch with me - we will be in the middle of the ocean lol! My dh says she will be fine and I need to cut the cord but still!!! I would feel different if she were a boy - isn't that ridiculous?