Do you find this strange? vacation related

[Minnie824]

So, my best friend is married for 13 yrs, has 3 DDs. Her DH has planned a vacation for just the 2 of them. Supposed to leave this coming up Sat for 4 nights. He didn't ask her if she wanted to go, or where she wanted to go, just planned it. (she doesn't really want to go btw) He had to ask his parents to watch the kids. Did so last night. Lied to them, said they were going to a completely different state, for her friends son's graduation. Not sure what his plans are on telling their own kids. Her DH works for his brother, and for some reason says he thought he wouldn't get paid for his vacation if he told them where they were really going (CA). They're going for 3 nights, each night at a different hotel, and not really many plans other than that. Does this seem odd to you? Once she mentioned him lying to her parents, I got a sudden Scott Peterson flashback moment. It just seems strange to me. What do you think?

 

[bananiem]

Not knowing their situation I'd say he REALLY wants to go away with his wife and it's romantic that he planned it. It is strange that he'd lie to his parents, but given that they'd probably tell their son (his boss) I could see that he'd lie to get his paid vacation. I think that's a bad idea and if they can't afford it without a paid vacation they shouldn't go so far. Maybe just a few nights at a local motel instead. Lying always comes out in the end.

 

[Maleficent13]

Lied to them, said they were going to a completely different state, for her friends son's graduation. Not sure what his plans are on telling their own kids. Her DH works for his brother, and for some reason says he thought he wouldn't get paid for his vacation if he told them where they were really going (CA).

This is strange. I highly doubt his brother has a specified vacation policy that states: "You will not be paid for any vacations to the state of California".

While it is weird, I don't know if it's Peterson weird.

 

[ericamanda01]

My first reaction was that he might be trying to surprise her. Perhaps he thought her parents would spill the beans and thats why he lied to them. But it does sound odd. Not kill you and dump the body odd, just odd.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Wow, my guess is her dh lies all the time and she is used to it. He sounds like a very insecure person.

 

[jeast]

Grown people lying about their vacation plans to family is weird. Unless he's trying to keep them from coming along?

 

[gris gris]

Maybe it's a big surprise and he's trying to keep them from spilling the beans? Maybe he'll call his family/kids when he gets to where they're going. I wish my DH would plan a surprise vacation for me........

 

[disykat]

My first thought is that he planned a romantic weekend for her, that he comes from a family that wouldn't understand that, and rather than put up with their guff he gave them a reason they would find understandable.

Lying to family members doesn't seem THAT strange to me. There are people on here all the time talking about how their family doesn't "get" their vacations and they just don't tell them anymore. In this case, he had to tell them he was going somewhere - so he lied. If my dh worked for family (heaven forbid!), he'd probably have to do the same thing. They don't take vacations and he would have a hard time justifying it in a way that wouldn't cause bad feelings.

 

[Aurora63]

Maybe he just wants to go away with his wife, and doesn't want his daughters to be sad that they aren't coming?

 

[diznygirl]

My first thought is that he planned a romantic weekend for her, that he comes from a family that wouldn't understand that, and rather than put up with their guff he gave them a reason they would find understandable.

ITA.

There are members of my family that wouldn't understand if DH and I took a trip without the kids, so I could see us just not telling them.

 

[Minnie824]

Well, thanks for all the opinions. Since DH & I talk to our parents, and they know of any vacations planned, it did seem odd to me. But, now that some have explained it, that could be the case that he may think his family wouldn't understand. They've lived in a small town all their lives, his mother has never gone anywhere, or learned to drive, and they may not understand wanting to go somewhere on their own. Now that I think about it more, thats probably what it is.

 

[NMAmy]

This is strange. I highly doubt his brother has a specified vacation policy that states: "You will not be paid for any vacations to the state of California".

While it is weird, I don't know if it's Peterson weird.

That's a pretty specific policy. Some bosses are SO controlling.

However, if I was going to California--I'd definitely lie about it to my family. Mainly because a big chunk of my extended family lives there and I'd love to take a vacation there without having to see any of them but they'd be terribly offended if they knew I was there and didn't set up a visit.

We solve this problem by not going to California unless we absolutely have to.

 

[kimmikayb]

The way he told his family/boss doesn't surprise me. I work for family too and when you do that, you have to give more then anyone else which means your "boss" ( in my case, my dad) don't understand romantic get aways or trips just for fun, there has to be a reason. Especially if you're going without kids.

I think he's trying to plan a romantic get away with his wife without kids or work stress. Of course, that's just a guess on my part since I don't know the people at all.

 

[ZachnElli]

I'd bet it was a surprise too. My dh tried that for our 10 year anniversary and my dad let it slip! My dad can't keep anything a secret!

 

[Microcell]

I have not told the truth to my boss about vacations, because she thinks since I work around my DH that every day he has off I am hers. She wouldn't be terribly understanding, so I have said I had a family thing. In Orlando, with a Mouse...

She does not need to know I am related to a mouse! Hey, Dan Murphy says we are family!

 

[Beth76]

My guess is that he's just trying to surprise her. With surprises come lies. Sounds like he's just a bad liar/surpriser (yes, I know that's not a word.)

 

[Amy]

ITA with whoever said that it looks like he's trying to surprise her and it's possible they have family that don't understand a husband and wife going away on vacation without their kids - my family is exactly the same way, which is why DH and I have gone away (only 2 nights each time) only TWICE since DS16 was born. Yep, only 2 short trips in 16 years w/o the kids.

What I DO find odd and worrysome is if he continues the lie AFTER they're gone. After all, what if one of the kids gets sick and they need to contact the parents? I'd hope that your friend's DH will call home and say "sorry, the trip was a surprise and I didn't want it ruined; we're really in Calif. and here's the number where we can be reached in an emergency." When there are kids involved, I don't think it's right for the parents to be completely unreachable.