Do you find the word "retard(ed)" offensive?

[ChrizJen]

When someone calls themself anything.......how can it be offensive?

The flip side, almost any word can be offense depending on the tone of how it's used when directed at SOMEONE else.

"You tuna!" "Lover" "Soda Jerk"."Pudding Head".."Spam for brains".and the list goes on, can all be offense to some depending how they are used.

The difference here is that by using the terms you referenced above, you're only offending the person to whom the insult is directed. (and possibly an inanimate object, such as spam or tuna). But when you use a word like "********", (or even "gay" for that matter) to offend a person, you're also offending a whole group of people. You use the word "********" or "gay" to imply that something is bad. Therefore, you've just labeled everyone who is in fact ******** or gay as bad.
I guess the bottom line is, think about the words you use casually and how many people can be hurt by them.

 

[Ember]

Sadly, even if we eliminated the word "retard" from the English language, another word would just replace it and people would use that word to be offensive with. It's the euphemism treadmill.

The thing about offensive terminology is that it meant to be offensive. I've heard students who have gotten in trouble for using the word retard simply replace it with phrases such as, "You have an exceptionality in the area of brains, dude." Because this is the phrasing the teacher had used (not the "area of brains" part, obviously) when she had to address a disability in her classroom. It's the intent behind the words, rather than the words themselves, that convey disrespect and insult.

There are many, many words, terms, and phrases that really irritate me. I hate that when you demonstrate courage you are said to have male genitalia. But when you are weak you are compared female genitalia. This bothers me a lot more than the term ********, but no one seems to think about it before saying it or what they're actually saying.

So, no, I find nothing actually wrong with the word "********," anymore than I find the word "gay" to be hurtful. (Which is much the same issue, with phases such as "that's so gay," being flung around.) But when the words are used to be derogatory or deliberately harmful, that's where I take issues with them.

 

[Robinrs]

I haven't watched Regis and Whoever in EONS but my uncle had it on while I was home early yesterday and I HEARD her... man, I thought, she's gonna HEAR about this!

 

[SunshineOR]

Used to be I would have said that people are too sensitive and they shouldn't get so worked up over people using a word. However, I married an epileptic and him having a seizure is a scary and very real thing for us.

I find myself feeling very upset when I hear people on television, movies or in real life make fun of someone acting strangely by saying, "Are you having a seizure or something?" I find that very belittling and insulting toward something very serious and painful for my husband and our family.

Based on that experience, I really understand why people with disabled loved ones being highly insulted by the way people throw around and use the word retard as an insult or derogatory term. I say it's offensive.

 

[just4today]

Sadly, even if we eliminated the word "retard" from the English language, another word would just replace it and people would use that word to be offensive with. It's the euphemism treadmill.

The thing about offensive terminology is that it meant to be offensive. I've heard students who have gotten in trouble for using the word retard simply replace it with phrases such as, "You have an exceptionality in the area of brains, dude." Because this is the phrasing the teacher had used (not the "area of brains" part, obviously) when she had to address a disability in her classroom. It's the intent behind the words, rather than the words themselves, that convey disrespect and insult.

There are many, many words, terms, and phrases that really irritate me. I hate that when you demonstrate courage you are said to have male genitalia. But when you are weak you are compared female genitalia. This bothers me a lot more than the term ********, but no one seems to think about it before saying it or what they're actually saying.

So, no, I find nothing actually wrong with the word "********," anymore than I find the word "gay" to be hurtful. (Which is much the same issue, with phases such as "that's so gay," being flung around.) But when the words are used to be derogatory or deliberately harmful, that's where I take issues with them.

That's exactly what I was thinking. It isn't the word itself - it's the sentiment behind it. The essay by John Franklin Stephens is sad, but even if the word "********" falls out of fashion, some other word will take its place. No matter how the vocabulary changes, the fact remains that Mr. Stephens will likely always feel that way. It is what it is.

 

[Deb in IA]

Used in a way to belittle, hurt, or make fun of another person, yes - I do find it offensive..

That.

The term "mental retardation" is an actual medical diagnosis, and I don't find that offensive, although there is talk that the next DSM-V may change this to "intellectual disability".

But to use it as a noun and to call or classify someone as a "retard" IS offensive.

 

[Minnesota!]

I don't find any words offensive. They only have the power you choose to give them, so I choose not to give them the power to offend me.

Ditto.

I don't use it b/c it feels clunky to me. But, I don't feel it is offensive (and YES I have a "special needs" child...still doesn't bother me.).

Words are words are words.

 

[Deb in IA]

When someone calls themself anything.......how can it be offensive?

Didn't Dr. Laura Schlessinger just get in big trouble for that argument??

 

[handinpocket]

Sticks and stones can break your bones, but words can never hurt you. Obviously, I don't find it offensive.

 

[mumom95]

This thread got me thinking, what is the definition of ********.

According to Webster's Ninth New Collegiate Dictionary:

********: slow or limited in intellectual or emotional development or academic progress.

 

[browneyes106]

I voted other. It depends on how it used. I don't think Jennifer Aniston meant to be offensive when she said that. Using the word "********" is a bad habit for people when they use it to call themselves or others dumb or something. A similar incident happened back in 2008 when Kristin Chenoweth called herself a retard on the Today Show.
http://www.kristin-chenoweth.com/blog/retard-comment-todays-show
http://www.kristin-chenoweth.com/content/the-today-show

I also don't Kristin meant any harm.

 

[georgina]

True, but the definition of retard as a verb is to cause to move or proceed slowly, delay or impede. I have called my son socially ********, because his social development is delayed.

 

[feenie]

While I think that politcal correctness is out of control, I don't Love the use of the word, because it hurts people who need love and understanding.

Of course when we were teenagers we used it CONSTANTLY to describe the stupid things our parents/teachers/etc made us do, and every once in a while even now it slips out in that sort of a context.

 

[disneyslp]

As an educator of Special Needs children I find the word "********" to be highly offensive when it is used as a derrogatory term. I have corrected each of my daughters friends when they have used this term. I explain to them that people who are labeled "special needs", "mentally impaired", etc have no choice that they are a little different than everyone else. I also point out that we are only one accident away from being handicapped ourselves and then how would you feel if someone said that about you?

 

[Robinrs]

Ditto.

I don't use it b/c it feels clunky to me. But, I don't feel it is offensive (and YES I have a "special needs" child...still doesn't bother me.).

Words are words are words.

Someone WAY smarter than me wrote: Death and life are in the power of the tongue.

There are MANY scriptures about the tongue and the power of words in scripture. Why, because the tongue and what it says can heal or hurt. SWORD=WORDS.

If you don't think so let someone call YOUR child a derogatory word. Or your spouse... or your mother. Tell me how you feel then.

 

[AristocatFan]

I work in special education........I find it very offensive.

 

[Hillbeans]

I voted other. It depends on how it used. I don't think Jennifer Aniston meant to be offensive when she said that. Using the word "********" is a bad habit for people when they use it to call themselves or others dumb or something. A similar incident happened back in 2008 when Kristin Chenoweth called herself a retard on the Today Show.
http://www.kristin-chenoweth.com/blog/retard-comment-todays-show
http://www.kristin-chenoweth.com/content/the-today-show

I also don't Kristin meant any harm.

Yes, this - I voted other as well.

I am late 30's and heard and i'm sure I said it a lot growing up. Just as others mentioned in this thread years ago it was said all the time. I don't think either one meant harm saying it but I can see how some may find it offensive. I can see why people want the word to stop being used, but I hardly think it's worth a front page headline on People or US Magazine.

 

[Jaime4004]

I don't find any words offensive. They only have the power you choose to give them, so I choose not to give them the power to offend me.

I feel the same... Why let things like this bother you? We all have bigger problems.

 

[Momvic5]

I hear kids and teenagers use the term "********" a lot. Honestly, I don't think they view it with the same sensitivity as many of us from an older generation do. When I was a kid in school, the term "********" was used to describe a person with a mental retardation so I am sensitive to it, but today, most schools use the terms "special needs" or "mentally impaired" so many kids are insensitive to the term because they don't have the same history with it. Most kids never hear the term "********" unless it is used as a word to describe a poor decision or an odd action.

 

[Imzadi]

I am also annoyed at how all encompassing being "politically correct" has become to the point of ridiculousness & in itself, inappropriate.

For acrylic painting supplies, there is a material called a retardant, also known as a retarder. It's purpose is to slow down or retard the drying time of acrylic paint so people can work with it longer.

Are we also supposed to get rid of that term as people may be offended by a product being called that? The person using the retardant isn't a retard. Although some special needs people may use it.

People need to get a grip on how a word is used and it's intention.

Wouldn't it be better to actually teach a special needs person to NOT be offended by the word? Someone taught them it is an offensive word, so they can clearly be taught how NOT to be offended by it.

Does Special Olympics (and other like organizations,) not realize, that even if they wiped that word from the vocabulary, that another word will be made up or appropriated to be used in the same way? The word isn't the problem. The bigotry of the people using it in an offensive manner is. Teach special needs children to handle the bigotry of the person, not the word.