Do you buy Tix for Girlfriend / Boyfriend?

[bom_noite]

We try to make it down from Hotlanta to WDW every year.

In years past we have taken our kids - and their friends. Depending upon those going - we have asked their friends to purchase Tix. In other years we knew the friends family could not afford it - so they were gratis.

But, both kids are now college age. We hope to get a BOG Ressie for lunch - that will be on me. We are DVC so any groceries will be paid with my wore out AMEX.

We have invited the daughters BF and sons GF! Two great kids who I love dearly*. My wife and I have just began the discussion and we want to do the right thing. Must the invitor pay the freight?

*Note - while the BF does not know - my son and I refer to him as old #24. When he is gone - we will welcome old #25 in to the fold. Unlike Old *1 through Old # 23 he is the only dude me and my son actually liked! I made my May '15 ressie yesterday and they asked if there would be a celebration? I told them if Old # 24 is with us - we will be celebrating!

Thanks!

 

[MakiraMarlena]

I don't think there's any one rule. Some would say if you invite you should pay all their expenses except maybe souvenirs/food (and some will say you should even buy the food). Others will say you can decide to provide just the lodgings.

So it's pretty much up to you, what you can afford and maybe how much you like them. If you've purchased tickets for the kids' friends in the past then it won't be out of character to do so now.

 

[DisMama5]

I agree with PP, I don't think there is any rule but if you are inviting I think it would be right to pay for some parts at least and leave maybe like food and spending $ to them as PP said. Otherwise they could just meet you down there without the invite truthfully lol. Sounds like a fun family trip!

 

[Owlpost23]

Our invite-we pay the expenses.We're going to US/IOA at the beginning of September-myself,husband,daughter,and her fella.Only thing he has to pay for is souvenirs.

 

[ghtx]

I disagree with PPs that you are obligated or expected to pay anything. You may if you want to ("I would like to invite you on a vacation with our family") but it is perfectly OK not to ("Our family is going on a vacation. Would you like to join us, paying your own way?").

Your "kids" are now college-aged, and therefore they (and hopefully the bf and gf) are adults, so it's a bit of a different story than if they were kids.

 

[starsweeper]

I agree with others, if you extend the invitation, you are offering to pay for lodging, meals, and tickets.

 

[ghtx]

I agree with others, if you extend the invitation, you are offering to pay for lodging, meals, and tickets.

I totally disagree. You can invite someone somewhere without it implying that you are paying for anything. I can call a friend up and say "wanna go see a movie?", and he won't think that I'm offering to pay for his ticket and popcorn.

The key is to be clear from the get-go. When/if you make the invitation, be very clear (and polite) about whether you are offering to pay or not.

 

[DisMama5]

I disagree with PPs that you are obligated or expected to pay anything. You may if you want to ("I would like to invite you on a vacation with our family") but it is perfectly OK not to ("Our family is going on a vacation. Would you like to join us, paying your own way?"). Your "kids" are now college-aged, and therefore they (and hopefully the bf and gf) are adults, so it's a bit of a different story than if they were kids.

Actually this is true and a good point, college aged is a lot different then if they were under age as in even in high school still or younger. I do think if your in college or around college age+ you should be providing for yourself. Now how you word the invite is definitely a factor because idk about everyone but when someone invites my kids on any sort of trip I'm assuming they are taking care of them money wise and safety wise, unless specified otherwise. Typically an invite suggests some type of catering to that's why it's called an invite. For example, when your invited to a birthday party, your fed. But I don't think it makes you a bad person to not pay just make sure to make that clear when the invite is given and I think all is good just my opinion

 

[WILDERNESS FAN 55]

Last year we invited both DD's boyfriends to go on our 9 day trip. I paid for room (DVC member 2br OKW) paid for 6 day tickets with fun option (golf with 1 bf and TL for everyone) Any scheduled Dinners I made I paid for. While they were out on their own they needed to come up with some $$. Worked pretty well. They even bought me a drink or two along our EPCOT Drink around the World tour ! Oh they were responsible for their own airline tix. I'd do it again.

 

[ShannonMB]

I agree that there's no real right/wrong here. Either way the kids are making out like bandits! My policy is strictly if I invite, I pay - but then again my DD is only 13 and I am just a strong believer that my extending an invitation should never be a burden to another parent. These ones being adults changes it a bit. Then again, they are probably starving students and even a couple hundred bucks apiece could be a deal breaker.

I say foot the bill. Soon enough you will have all your own money back (if all goes well!)

 

[ghtx]

Last year we invited both DD's boyfriends to go on our 9 day trip. I paid for room (DVC member 2br OKW) paid for 6 day tickets with fun option (golf with 1 bf and TL for everyone) Any scheduled Dinners I made I paid for. While they were out on their own they needed to come up with some $$. Worked pretty well. They even bought me a drink or two along our EPCOT Drink around the World tour ! Oh they were responsible for their own airline tix. I'd do it again.

Your DD has two boyfriends?

 

[bom_noite]

Last year we invited both DD's boyfriends to go on our 9 day trip. I paid for room (DVC member 2br OKW) paid for 6 day tickets with fun option (golf with 1 bf and TL for everyone) Any scheduled Dinners I made I paid for. While they were out on their own they needed to come up with some $$. Worked pretty well. They even bought me a drink or two along our EPCOT Drink around the World tour ! Oh they were responsible for their own airline tix. I'd do it again.

E1's replies have been great! Love this post though! We are lucky in that our Kids friends have always been very gracious ones. If we pay or don't pay they usually (or their parents told them too) pick up a lunch or a Dole-Whip or a Beer for Papa-Donald!

We took 4 friends of my daughter down one year for her sweet 16. These girls got together and bought us a thank you present! We all wandered in to Art of Disney at DTD - My wife and I liked a $30 print but walked away saying - love it - but we will pass! They took the bus over later and bought it for us! I have tears in my eye's thinking of that experience! I did spend one Hundred on a suitable frame! OMG! That picture is the most special in our collection!

Son is in Law School and his GF and I drove to DC for one of his interviews and a 3-day mini-vac. We were walking back to the hotel and trying to decide on dinner and we found a Chinese Buffet and she demanded to pay! Have told my son about 43 times what a good girl she is and he should not screw it up! 42 times he said - "agreed - got it!" On 43 he said "ENOUGH YOU OLD FAT FOOL! I GOT IT!" Kidding here.....

These social graces are usually lost on the younger generation! Good parents create good kids.

 

[IamJBo]

Your DD has two boyfriends?

I think they meant they have 2 DD's. Not that DD has 2 BF's. Otherwise that would've made for one interesting trip.

OP - I don't think you should feel obligated to purchase their tickets for them. If they are hesitant to go because they might not be able to afford it then you can offer - don't let them assume you are paying for their entire trip.

A nice gesture would be to pay for the BOG lunch as well.

They can fend for their own souvenirs.

 

[bom_noite]

I think they meant they have 2 DD's. Not that DD has 2 BF's. Otherwise that would've made for one interesting trip.

OP - I don't think you should feel obligated to purchase their tickets for them. If they are hesitant to go because they might not be able to afford it then you can offer - don't let them assume you are paying for their entire trip.

A nice gesture would be to pay for the BOG lunch as well.

They can fend for their own souvenirs.

If she had 2 BF's - invite them both and let them fight it out - I am good with this and will pay for the Tix! For right or wrong My DD usually dumps them for another.

My DS and I would encourage a Battle Royale though! But, as stated: we are fond of old # 24 and will be pulling for him!

That gets me thinking about our day at the GF when she was 13 and we saw the horses and dudes in White Whigs escorting the wonderful chariot and a beautiful bride over for a spectacular wedding! My DD got this fat lip and said: "Oh Daddy - that is what I want!". I told her "Princess don't fret! The '98 Saab has a fully functioning sun-roof and her brothers friends can certainly pull it from All Stars to Irlo Bronson!

Moderators - maybe this should be moved to the Budget Board?

 

[Reddog1134]

When I went on vacation with my girlfriends family to Busch Gardens and Kings Dominion they paid for my park tickets.

The funny thing is nobody knew we broke up before the trip but she made me go anyway.

We're married now so it's all good.

 

[catne]

we have invited GFs, and BFs, as well as fiances when that time came. I don't think you can put inviting an unrelated person along on your vacation in the same boat as calling up a friend and see if they want to go see a movie.

We have always, always covered all expenses from the room costs to all meals & tickets. Not just because we are doing the inviting...but because we figure it actually IS costing the person something to go. All of the teens & young adults that have gone with us had jobs...and had to take un-paid time off to go on vacation since none of them were working full time with benefits.

Many people cannot afford WDW...at all. And I have yet to meet a college student that could afford tickets to WDW. Most of them can barely afford the cost of movie ticket, much less popping for $100+ to go to WDW for even just one day. If they're needing multi-day park hoppers...whoa, big expense for a college kid. Personally, I think if you can't or don't want to pay for the guests, don't invite them.

Now...if the GF or the BF just asked to come along...without having been invited...well, that would be different. Then I would expect them to cover their share of the expenses including ticket & food (and transportation, if that was involved too.) Of if you were asking full-fledged adults, on their own & making good money...well, that might be different, too.

But basically still "kids"...in college...and you invited them? I would say you cover the expenses.


Just my 2 Cents

 

[artemis4]

We try to make it down from Hotlanta to WDW every year.

In years past we have taken our kids - and their friends. Depending upon those going - we have asked their friends to purchase Tix. In other years we knew the friends family could not afford it - so they were gratis.

But, both kids are now college age. We hope to get a BOG Ressie for lunch - that will be on me. We are DVC so any groceries will be paid with my wore out AMEX.

We have invited the daughters BF and sons GF! Two great kids who I love dearly*. My wife and I have just began the discussion and we want to do the right thing. Must the invitor pay the freight?

*Note - while the BF does not know - my son and I refer to him as old #24. When he is gone - we will welcome old #25 in to the fold. Unlike Old *1 through Old # 23 he is the only dude me and my son actually liked! I made my May '15 ressie yesterday and they asked if there would be a celebration? I told them if Old # 24 is with us - we will be celebrating!

Thanks!

I assume you are driving if you are only in Atlanta, so you are providing transportation, lodging and in room meals. You are supporting a good deal of the cost of the trip for the boy/girlfriends. I don't consider it unreasonable to ask an adult accompanying your family on a vacation to pay for their own ticket and some meals, especially considering the other costs you are absorbing.

We consider this appropriate for youth guests as well. We brought an extra kid to Disney last time and will do so again next time. We are paying lodging, transportation and meals. Said child did/will pay for her/his own ticket. Before the invitation was extended to the child, we spoke with parents privately to confirm it would be okay and conveyed the ticket purchase expectation. If it hadn't been okay with the parent, the invitation would not have been extended to the child.

 

[nerderella]

We a mid-30's couple with no kids, also DVC/AP and my logic is this: Our DVC contract is already paid off, minus whatever monthly charges accrue. Our APs are paid off. So whenever we go to Disney, for all intents and purposes at that moment, the only things we spend money on are food and entertainment not included in admission. It's not entirely equivalent since we invite other adults, but we have a conversation about what they can reasonably spend on a trip and go from there. In your shoes, I'd pay up-front and then if they offered to cover their own cost I'd work something out.

Many people cannot afford WDW...at all. And I have yet to meet a college student that could afford tickets to WDW. Most of them can barely afford the cost of movie ticket, much less popping for $100+ to go to WDW for even just one day. If they're needing multi-day park hoppers...whoa, big expense for a college kid. Personally, I think if you can't or don't want to pay for the guests, don't invite them.

THIS. Even with a work study job and whatever I got paid when home on break, I never had that much extra money as a college student unless someone gave it to me. I definitely wasn't going to Disney unless it was a family trip or someone could cover my expenses.

 

[Aurora0427]

We try to make it down from Hotlanta to WDW every year.

In years past we have taken our kids - and their friends. Depending upon those going - we have asked their friends to purchase Tix. In other years we knew the friends family could not afford it - so they were gratis.

But, both kids are now college age. We hope to get a BOG Ressie for lunch - that will be on me. We are DVC so any groceries will be paid with my wore out AMEX.

We have invited the daughters BF and sons GF! Two great kids who I love dearly*. My wife and I have just began the discussion and we want to do the right thing. Must the invitor pay the freight?

*Note - while the BF does not know - my son and I refer to him as old #24. When he is gone - we will welcome old #25 in to the fold. Unlike Old *1 through Old # 23 he is the only dude me and my son actually liked! I made my May '15 ressie yesterday and they asked if there would be a celebration? I told them if Old # 24 is with us - we will be celebrating!

Thanks!

If you extend the invitation to someone to come with you on your vacation, then you really should pick up the tab.

 

[jtowntoflorida]

FWIW, when I was in college, even if one of my boyfriend's parents had invited me to go along on vacation, I would have had to decline unless they covered all the costs. Like others have mentioned, there just wasn't any money for such things in my budget, and my parents couldn't afford to pay for me, either.

So, I'd offer to cover the tickets for them.