Do you allow guests to serve themselves?

[sweetpeakaris]

I allow guests to serve themselves. I don't eat much and wouldn't want anyone giving me a plate of food.

 

[punkin]

If they taste good, it shouldn't matter.


I've only once ever received a plate of food at someone's house and I did not like that. There was some sort of side dish with chopped up tomatoes. I can't (won't) eat tomatoes. And I sat there and stared at the tomaotes the entire meal trying to talk myself into eating them so as to not be rude to the hostess. I can think of a million things that I prefer not to eat but that I would choke down if I needed to. Nope, I couldn't do it with the tomatoes. I finally had to tell her that everything was wonderful and I'm sorry but I just can not eat the tomatoes. Fortunately, she was gracious about it.

Presentation is very important and yes, it was fortunate that your hostess was gracious.

I generally serve family style unless it is a formal dinner. In that case, everything other than the hors d'oeuvres (which I usually set out buffet style) is plated. Of course I only do formal dinners once or twice a year (and not every year either).

 

[MIGrandma]

I let my adult guests serve themselves. That way they can chose the items and portion size. Instead of putting everything on the table though, I line up the serving dishes on a bar near my kitchen. The guests can serve themselves like at a buffet and then seat themselves at the table. That eliminates all the passing around of dishes and allows parents to help small children.

This is what I do as well.

I don't recall ever hosting a dinner in my home where I plated the food for everyone. If I were going to do that, I would let everyone know ahead of time what the menu was going to be and then they could tell me if there was anything they did not want on their plate. And even then, when dinner was served, I would tell people they did NOT have to be a member of the "clean plate club" if they didn't want to be.

 

[kristilew]

When we just have casual guests over, I serve the same way I do for my family: that is, I plate the food as they look on over the high counter that divides the kitchen from the seating area. I pause to ask if they want each item, how much ,etc, then hand them the finished plate.

For large parties, buffet style, and for formal meals we actually pass the food because I have a bazillion serving pieces in my fancy china and silver.

I never realized I was all that unusual. I guess the next time we have folks over, I'll ask if they prefer to serve themselves. Always learning something new on the Dis!

 

[traviesojmt]

The only thing that I ever pre-plate is dessert. It is just easier to cut a pie or other dessert in the kitchen. The main meal is always served family or buffet style in our house.

 

[mrodgers]

Usually one person serves, and calls out the food as they serve it so everyone gets the correct food....

"Double Whopper with cheese...."

"Cheeseburger and onion rings...."

"Chicken sandwich, mayo only, and fries...."

 

[mamajoan]

Usually one person serves, and calls out the food as they serve it so everyone gets the correct food....

"Double Whopper with cheese...."

"Cheeseburger and onion rings...."

"Chicken sandwich, mayo only, and fries...."

 

[NMAmy]

Putting big pans of food on the table wouldn't do justice to my fancy dishes.

My mother would have a coronary if I put big pans of food on the table--especially if I had company. Even for meals with just immediate family, food is put on the table in pretty antique serving bowls or platters.

 

[Art 1]

My wife cooks gourmet as a hobby, she can spend two days making a meal, she makes it all from scratch, sauces and all. We entertain often, the people love coming over for her food, she knows how to do it all right.

I have seen her do plate the food and also put the food on nice serving plates for the people to serve themselves. She always plates the soup and salad.

 

[aprilgail2]

We always let guests take their own fod- I couldn't imagine plating food for a grown up...maybe a small child but never a grown up....I actually woldn't even do it for a small child- thats their parents job. I would totally gross out if someone handed me a plate of food with meat on it! That would be the end of my dinner right there! I would never treat guests like children by putting food on their plates!

 

[Art 1]

We always let guests take their own fod- I couldn't imagine plating food for a grown up...maybe a small child but never a grown up....I actually woldn't even do it for a small child- thats their parents job. I would totally gross out if someone handed me a plate of food with meat on it! That would be the end of my dinner right there! I would never treat guests like children by putting food on their plates!

That's how it's done at restaurants and better events. It's much more formal to plate the food for your guests. Have you ever been to a reception that plates the food? Much nicer than a free for all.

 

[disneyfav4ever]

If it's a small group family style, any more then six people, it's served buffet style.

 

[fabmic]

I let my guest serve themselves from either the plates on the table or island or from the plate I carry around, if there is not room or them.

 

[Bethenny]

I would totally gross out if someone handed me a plate of food with meat on it! That would be the end of my dinner right there! I would never treat guests like children by putting food on their plates!

As important as it is to be a gracious hostess, it's equally important to be a gracious guest.

 

[fabmic]

That's how it's done at restaurants and better events. It's much more formal to plate the food for your guests. Have you ever been to a reception that plates the food? Much nicer than a free for all.

I am not a restaurant and I am not hosting a reception but a family member hosting a dinner at my home. I don't have to do what businesses do and I am not getting paid to do the meal.

 

[marcyinPA]

Almost always let guests serve themselves. We usually set things up on the counters buffet-style. That way, everyone can take what and how much they want.

 

[punkin]

As important as it is to be a gracious hostess, it's equally important to be a gracious guest.

definitely quotable!

Really, there is no wrong way to do this. why are people getting offended.

 

[aprilgail2]

That's how it's done at restaurants and better events. It's much more formal to plate the food for your guests. Have you ever been to a reception that plates the food? Much nicer than a free for all.

At any wedding reception or dinner that I have attended we were asked first what we wanted to order (typically 4 choices at a wedding) I would order what I wanted on my dish- they don't just slap food in front of you that you did not order. Restaurants are the same- I say I would like such and such and NO such and such and that is how my plate comes. They don't just put food on the plate to color coordinate the looks!

 

[Carly_Roach]

I'm trying to remember a time when we've plated food for our guests. Most of the time everything is out in the middle in nice dishes with serving utensils so everyone can take what they want. Our friends and family seem to be mindful of each other and I haven't seen too much of the "spaghetti" incident food hogs described upthread.

Even my mashed-potato-loving brother will take a small first serving, eat it while everyone else serves and eats, and then after verifying that NO ONE ELSE wants any more mashed potatos he'll take my beautiful serving dish, put it in front of himself, cover it in gravy and dig in. The women in our family have given up trying to discourage that behavior in my brother. However, we have successfully trained the other men to NOT fight over the mashed potato bowl because they wish they'd have thought of that idea first.

In his defense, DB only does it when immediate family is around. If we're hosting out of town guests or cousins, he won't do that. Of course in those situations whatever potatos that are left in the mashing pan in the kitchen is another story. That concoction of potato and gravy mess typically gets eaten over the sink with a can of beer or Pepsi nearby to wash it down with. DSis and I tease him that this is one of the reasons he's still single!

When we have a turkey or roast, DH will carve and plate the meat after asking guests what they want, but everything else (vegetables, bread, rolls, cranberry sauce, etc) is serve yourself.

I WILL plate desserts - especially if I've made a fancy cheesecake that I want to drizzle chocolate sauce over and present. And I worry about my guests feeling bad about accidentally dropping icing or pie filling on the nice linen so I plate cake and pie servings myself on the sideboard.

 

[ksjayhawks]

I serve both ways. With just the three of us--dh, ds, and me--we usually plate our own and sit down. With more family, it depends on the main dish. I sometimes plate the main dish to make sure everyone gets a serving and then have the sides set up as a buffet or put on the table in serving dishes; other times everything is put on the table. I tend to cook pretty much as to quantity needed plus enough for my lunch the next day as my family is not real crazy about leftovers, other than a few casseroles that I make.

Most of the time I do the same with a formal dinner--plate the main and let guests serve themselves sides from sides put in nice serving dishes on the table. Once in a great while, I will plate the whole dinner--depends on what I am serving and if I am aiming for presentation as well.