Do you agree with this?

[luvmy3]

No, you just missed my point.

However, we can agree to disagree. This issue just isn't important enough for me to argue back and forth about all day.

I do get your point but its all about perception to the parent who is reading the sheet. Sending home steps to raise your child a certain way can be taken way different than sending home tips on how to help a child be a happy student. One can come across pretty offensive to those who believe the school shouldn't be involved in the raising of their child. Its pretty evident here in this thread thats for sure.

 

[marcyinPA]

Because it's undermining someones parenting style, in front of their child.

I just don't see it that way....at all.

 

[OceanAnnie]

You are assuming the teacher is doing this, as opposed to the school office or administrators.

I didn't say "who" to send them to. As long as the school is passing on "good" information, why not spread the wealth? Would they not be receptive? Parents come across good articles too.

 

[Buckalew11]

Because it's undermining someones parenting style, in front of their child.

I don't see it that way either.

I rarely spanked but I did spank. My dd has been exposed to the "no spanking" thought on TV, in magazines/newspapers, internet, school, etc. I don't consider it undermining. I just think it is another viewpoint.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I do get your point but its all about perception to the parent who is reading the sheet.

And this is exactly what I meant when I said "Another interpretation is that".

 

[PeterPan09]

Because it's undermining someones parenting style, in front of their child.

If it was addressed personally-yeah, then I'd see that as insulting. It appears as if it was something that was handed out to every child, so I don't see it as a directed insult.

We have a lawyer in our area that runs advertisements on cable with messages like this all the time. I'm sure people find it offensive to have this stranger coming into their home and telling them about living within their means and spending quality time with their kids, but I'm also pretty sure he only means to be helpful by sharing things that have worked for his family.

 

[Coconut36]

My initial reaction was to be offended but I guess that I can see why the schools might interfere a bit.

A lot is expected from the schools. Some people want them to monitor the kids even when they are away from the school. The lines are very blurry probably even to the schools.

I agree. Unfortunately for the schools they are in an unpleasant position and if life at home for children is miserable their school work and achievement is miserable too..but the teacher is still held accountable for it. So many parents think they dust their hands of their kids by sending them off to school (it's the teachers job to...) but never think about the fact that everything that happens at home..fights with a spouse/SO, poor nutrition, lack of sleep, poor attitude/behavior regarding school..etc impacts their school work tremendously.

I don't think that is meant to be taken 100% literally either and obviously everyone is different in what is best for them so I think it is meant to be taken as some "helpful hints" not "this is what you have to do and it is the only way". Things like chores for the kids..no biggie. Those particular chores maybe not but having children involved in the household is a valuable thing for them as well. Mine start preschool in a Montessori environment and Montessori stresses "life skill" type activities and that involves things like setting the table or sweeping or washing dishes and things like that. Many household activities can be adapted to be age appropriate and involve the kids so I don't see that one as a big deal nor do I see many of them as being any big issue or as I said meant to be taken a "this is the only way to do things and you must do this now" so I don't see a big deal.

 

[allison443]

I googled to see who wrote this piece. It is by John Rosemond, a well-known "parenting expert" who teaches an old-fashioned, Bible-based style of parenting.
He also believes in spanking, for the person who mentioned it above.

 

[luvmy3]

And this is exactly what I meant when I said "Another interpretation is that".

But you never actually answered the question, do you see the difference and why some would be offended by that sheet coming home?
People here are wondering why some would be offended, obviously they don't see that difference.

Not arguing, just discussing

 

[marcyinPA]

Exactly - little Johnny was raised in a home with an alcoholic dad, who beat his mom when he wasn't out shacking up with his girlfriend. Then he noticed the flyer from school, he changed his ways, and everyone lived happily ever after.

If problems are so bad at home that it's affecting a students school life, a little less tv time isn't going to make a difference.

Obviously Johnny's dad has bigger problems. But lets simplify it- Johnny's parents don't work as a team. They don't drink, and they don't beat the crap out of each other. They just don't work well together- they don't respect each other. Johnny learns that it's normal to not work well together, to not share ideas and respect others opinions. Johnny goes to school, and guess what? He doesn't get along with other children. He can't work in a group, and he the only opinion he accepts is his own. Whose problem is it now? It's the teacher's problem. The school's problem. Can you see why the school will try anything to fix the problem?

The bigger picture here is that society has created a monster that the schools now have to deal with, day in and day out. If parents would just step back and use common sense, accept help and be open to it and stop being so darn sensitive....geesh!!

 

[Coconut36]

Obviously Johnny's dad has bigger problems. But lets simplify it- Johnny's parents don't work as a team. They don't drink, and they don't beat the crap out of each other. They just don't work well together- they don't respect each other. Johnny learns that it's normal to not work well together, to not share ideas and respect others opinions. Johnny goes to school, and guess what? He doesn't get along with other children. He can't work in a group, and he the only opinion he accepts is his own. Whose problem is it now? It's the teacher's problem. The school's problem. Can you see why the school will try anything to fix the problem?

The bigger picture here is that society has created a monster that the schools now have to deal with, day in and day out. If parents would just step back and use common sense, accept help and be open to it and stop being so darn sensitive....geesh!!

Agree..especially with the bold.

 

[marcyinPA]

I googled to see who wrote this piece. It is by John Rosemond, a well-known "parenting expert" who teaches an old-fashioned, Bible-based style of parenting.
He also believes in spanking, for the person who mentioned it above.

I'm not a spanker, but I like John Rosemond. Bible-based or not- I like old fashioned parenting. I'm the parent, the kid is the kid....makes sense to me.

 

[kaytieeldr]

Agree with all but #7, which I think is completely wrong, and # 8 in that I think that sports can be great hobies. I have been a runner my entire life. It is amazing and helps foster a healthy lifestyle.

While running is healthy, and exercise, and a sport - according to tip # 8 it also meets the definition of a hobby. You did well!

 

[Pigeon]

I googled to see who wrote this piece. It is by John Rosemond, a well-known "parenting expert" who teaches an old-fashioned, Bible-based style of parenting.
He also believes in spanking, for the person who mentioned it above.

He's a pretty controversial figure, and is not particularly well-regarded in the mental health field. I'd be calling the school board if they were wasting taxpayer money dispensing this guy's fluff.

 

[morethananyonex]

My problem? Schools are already facing enough trouble with budgets and having to cut necessities, for example forcing students to have to share textbooks if they even have them at all. Why are they wasting time and money sending home articles like this when it's likely the people who need the advice aren't reading them anyways?

 

[Pea-n-Me]

it is not the role of the school to dispense marriage advice to parents, period. And does anyone, either administrators or teachers, seriously think that parents are going to alter their marriage practices based on a piece of fluff sent home from the school?

When we were leaving the hospital as first time parents to newborn twins, one of the discharge instructions the nurse gave us was to "get a babysitter and go out to dinner together one week from now without the babies". I thought it seemed a little strange, especially given that I was a nurse in this same hospital and I'd never seen anything nearing this "type" of advice.

It was only later that I fully appreciated the validity of her "directive" to us. It was meant to keep our marriage strong. For six months we were completely sleep deprived and depleted and actually almost had a fist fight one night when neither of us had not even an ounce of energy left to get up yet one more time.

I suppose I could have chosen to be offended, given this nurse had no real right to offer marital advice. Heck, I probably even could have gotten her in trouble. Instead, I chose to take her advice in the spirit it was intended knowing her insight and wisdom in this matter was certainly far more than my own. She meant well and it was good, solid advice that I learned to cherish over the years, as it served as a simple reminder to us when things got crazy, and I know we both came to appreciate it.

 

[kaytieeldr]

Look, I'm not parent but I find it odd that a public school would send this home. It is another blurring of the lines between the school's role and the parent's role. It isn't the worst example but it is part of what I see as a problem.

The steps themselves seem reasonable enough as a whole though.

Respectfully, just from reading the DIS, parents have been blurring that line for years. See all the threads on "the schools/teachers work for us so we'll do what we want when it comes to _____ and the heck with the rules".

 

[MrsDuck]

I actually think the "steps" are fine---but for some reason it would bother me that my child was bringing home things to me from school about parenting...

Yes..

And..

I think that sheet would go right into the recycle pile at my house.

Yes!

 

[FireDancer]

Respectfully, just from reading the DIS, parents have been blurring that line for years. See all the threads on "the schools/teachers work for us so we'll do what we want when it comes to _____ and the heck with the rules".

Believe me, I see it both ways. Neither is right but this thread is about only one of them.

 

[Pigeon]

Obviously Johnny's dad has bigger problems. But lets simplify it- Johnny's parents don't work as a team. They don't drink, and they don't beat the crap out of each other. They just don't work well together- they don't respect each other. Johnny learns that it's normal to not work well together, to not share ideas and respect others opinions. Johnny goes to school, and guess what? He doesn't get along with other children. He can't work in a group, and he the only opinion he accepts is his own. Whose problem is it now? It's the teacher's problem. The school's problem. Can you see why the school will try anything to fix the problem?

The bigger picture here is that society has created a monster that the schools now have to deal with, day in and day out. If parents would just step back and use common sense, accept help and be open to it and stop being so darn sensitive....geesh!!

The reality is that the schools are impotent to fix the deeper societal problems. They aren't funded or staffed adequately to do so, nor is it their mission nor their particular area of expertise. They are often not even staffed or funded adequately to perform the functions that are in their purview.

The idea that sending home piles of fluffy advice is going to cure poverty, alcoholism, drug addiction, domestic violence or any other major issue is wishful thinking plain and simple.