Do servers not want a tip?

[kamik86]

One other thing to note on why this is probably getting more common.

I don't think that many people pay in cash anymore. I know when I go out with work colleagues we speciacally all have to go get cash to make sure we dont' have hassles in paying with who owes money to whom when it all ends up on cards.

One day at applebees they had to process cards the old way as their internet went down with those little reader machines that press hard and get an imprint of the card numbers. Due to this it was obvious who paid by what method and even with the extra hassle 90% of people paid with cards.

Most people I know rarely carry around much cash. We carry a few bucks if needed quickly but prefer to pay everything by card.

Due to this the situation you described is probably much more rare then it was years ago when most used cash.



As for why people do what they do. Frankly when I worked with the public which thankfully I don't anymore I had customers get made because I did X then another get made that I didn't do X. People don't realize that just because you want something X way doesn't mean everyone else does. You have already seen this in this thread as some much prefer getting as few bills as possible where others want the server to infer and give them smaller ones. Without you being a regular customer the server can't know and can't win.

 

[mom2rtk]

Gosh, that's harsh. One of mine was a server during college. It was kind of shocking to her the games a few customers played about tips. Once it was some convoluted deal that resulted in her "passing" their test. Sheesh. She learned to be extra careful, and never assume anything. Darned if you do, darned if you don't.

I think if you try something 4x and it's been a fail every time, it's time to change your method.

I was a server myself many years ago. It's a really challenging job.

I'm not saying people should play games. I think it's quite childish. I'm just saying the server benefits by putting the right change into the hands of the customer to facilitate the correct tip. Don't make it easy for the customer to justify shorting them. It's not required, but it's smart.

And I have said twice already that I agree that if it's not working for the OP, she needs to change what she's doing.

 

[gwynne]

If I hand the cashier at Walmart an extra $10 I expect confusion.

If I hand an extra $10 to someone paid by tips and ask for change I don't expect confusion. People appear to have lost the ability to infer intent from context and to do basic math.

I think they've had to learn the hard way to be cautious. Certainly it's not too much trouble to politely tell them your request.

 

[kamik86]

And you have to trust that the customer isn't going to say that they "accidentally" left a $20 (instead of a $10) in with the rest of the cash....There are good reasons for even a great server to proceed with some caution in this scenario.

Yeah making change is something that people are told to be very careful about in stores. There were a few at my husbands store that would ask to switch bills 3/4 times in the hopes of confusing the cashier enough to them claim they didn't give them enough and have the cashier just give in. It worked quite a few times too. Due to this they have a policy about not making extra change now which Im sure frustrates many honest customers.

 

[mom2rtk]

Some are going to leave a $2 tip, some will leave none.

Some will do it simply because they are cheap, some will do it because the service is poor - and apparently some will do it because they want to punish a server for not doing what they wanted instead of what they were asked. Can't help coming across people like that.

I usually take very good care of any half-decent or better servers because I know they have to deal with those types of people all day.

And some will do it because they only have 2 ones and no time to wait for the server to show up again and get change. The smart server takes that issue right off the table and leaves small bills as change.

I take good care of my servers as well. I'm very generous, probably because I waited tables many years ago myself.

 

[mom2rtk]

Yeah making change is something that people are told to be very careful about in stores. There were a few at my husbands store that would ask to switch bills 3/4 times in the hopes of confusing the cashier enough to them claim they didn't give them enough and have the cashier just give in. It worked quite a few times too. Due to this they have a policy about not making extra change now which Im sure frustrates many honest customers.

I doubt any restaurant would have a policy of not making extra change though.

 

[gwynne]

I doubt any restaurant would have a policy of not making extra change though.

No, but returning the $10.00 would be a good solution if the customer didn't politely spell out their extra request.

 

[Allison]

You are being unnecessarily harsh, OP. Many people here can see how your request could be misinterpreted. It doesn't mean people can't infer context or do basic math. No need to throw insults or be condescending.

 

[mom2rtk]

No, but returning the $10.00 would be a good solution if the customer didn't politely spell out their extra request.

We're right back where we started. So we're going to have to agree to disagree on that.

I think it's reasonable to assume in a restaurant that if someone includes an extra ten with the payment that they need change.

But apparently that's not working out for the OP. So it's on her to change something.

 

[Hikergirl]

As for why people do what they do. Frankly when I worked with the public which thankfully I don't anymore I had customers get made because I did X then another get made that I didn't do X. People don't realize that just because you want something X way doesn't mean everyone else does. You have already seen this in this thread as some much prefer getting as few bills as possible where others want the server to infer and give them smaller ones. Without you being a regular customer the server can't know and can't win.

I think this is what it comes own too. That server had no way of knowing if the OP was going to leave her a $3 tip or a $5 or more. If she broke the $10 into 2 fives she'd be assuming it was $5 or more. Then there would be the thread I can't believe my server assumed I was going to leave her X amount when she only deserved X amount.......

I think she did the right thing. If I wanted the $10 slit up I wouldn't have asked for change, I would have asked specifically to break it. I think the OP could have been more clear and I think its a real shame that she has insulted the intelligence of the server just because her clear as mud request wasn't followed. I get the feeling that in this case there was no winning for that server no matter what.

 

[CPanther95]

Just to add:

In the same position, generally what I do is I'd put the 2 20's in the folder with the bill and hand it with the $10 bill on top and simply ask her to "break the ten". I'd do the math knowing that I'd probably leave the $7.80 as a tip (unless the server was above average) so I'd be fine with getting 2 Fives back. If I wanted to tip less than 20%, instead of saying "break the ten", I'd say, "can I get a five and 5 Ones for this?".

What I wouldn't do is burden a waitress with the job of:
1) Attempting to read my mind that I wanted the Ten broken
2) Then go through all the permutations of tip percentage and the associated bills required to leave those percentages
3) Then guess what tip she thinks I want to give so she can determine which combo to return to me.

Servers have enough to do with multiple tables all day long. The least you can do is do your own math and be clear about what specific change you may need if you weren't prepared with a proper way to leave the tip you want.

 

[kamik86]

I doubt any restaurant would have a policy of not making extra change though.

I used to think that about stores but then DHs did this. If they did I can see a resteraunt doing the same since the extra time to take the bill away from the customer and come back would make it easier for the customer to argue that they didn't receive the correct amount back.As well as all the switching taking much more time from the servers other duties.

 

[tvguy]

I went out to dinner Saturday and was SURPRISED that my $18 in change came a 3 $5 bills and 3 $1 bills. Not a problem, just surprised because I always make sure I have exact change for a tip before I go out to eat.

 

[mom2rtk]

I went out to dinner Saturday and was SURPRISED that my $18 in change came a 3 $5 bills and 3 $1 bills. Not a problem, just surprised because I always make sure I have exact change for a tip before I go out to eat.

I actually leave higher tips for servers who do this, as it indicates they are thinking about how to make my job easier.

 

[CPanther95]

And some will do it because they only have 2 ones and no time to wait for the server to show up again and get change. The smart server takes that issue right off the table and leaves small bills as change.

That's no different than someone that racks up a $37.20 bill when they only had $40 on them. They can justify that $2 tip however they want (whether they have no more than that, or aren't willing to give more than that because they don't feel like waiting for change.) either way, they are sticking the server with a $2 tip.

Seems to be a lot of hassle just to avoid simply asking for what you want instead of punishing any server that doesn't guess correctly what you want.

 

[Aliceacc]

There's also the occasional customer who will state that he didn't give her an extra $10, it was a $20.

Without you specifying that you wanted her to break the $10, she can state that the money never left her hand; she's giving you back the same $10 bill you gave her.

Of course, she could have also just been busy, and your poorly phrased request may have slipped her mind.

 

[Goofy_Disney_Dad]

I just returned from breakfast and just had to share my story. The server brought us our check that totaled $22.89 so I handed her a twenty and a ten and told her I needed change. She brought back $7.11 and I just shook my head and wondered how she could not comprehend my request. The parking meter outside was about to expire and I needed to put in another quarter. When I ask for change I expect to get actual change, but this server didn't seem to have the basic life skills necessary to understand what I'd asked for. Not a quarter to be found in my "change". I just couldn't even begin to explain how disappointed this made me. We had to leave a bit earlier than I'd hoped because I didn't want to risk a parking ticket on top of all my frustration. Her tip reflected her lack of ability to understand and meet my needs. I weep for our future.

 

[Aliceacc]

You needed "silver" or "coins" or "a quarter."
She brought you your change.
Thankfully, I imagine your service did not reflect your attitude.

It's not her fault that you came unprepared to pay the parking meter, or that you chose to wait until the very last minute to request the change you needed all throughout the course of your meal. Or that your last minute rushed request wasn't specific.

And I don't weep for our future. I teach high school kids and am constantly amazed at all the good they're capable of.

 

[wishinitwas]

When I was working with money if you over paid me like that I would just give the big bill back. Nothing to do with not wanting a tip. Now if you asked me to also break the 10 into 2-5s or a 5 and 5 ones or into ones I would ablige but if it is just left in there I would think you over paid is all.

I agree with this. I know math but I wouldn't have understood what type of change you wanted for the $10 and assumed it was an error to put it there. Maybe explain 2 5s or all 1s or something. I am not a person who likes to assume what people mean and be wrong.

 

[CPanther95]

I actually leave higher tips for servers who do this, as it indicates they are thinking about how to make my job easier.

A server with the job of waiting on tables all day probably doesn't consider your "job" of calculating a tip to be one that she (or he) needs to make "easier".