Do people use their kids as an excuse?

[Planogirl]

Very few people leave their carts wherever in our area. But then we get such high winds and the carts just go flying if they're left out. I guess that they don't get as much wind in Florida.

 

[lillygator]

I have an idea. Put your small child in the shopping cart child seat. When you return to the car, your other child can help you unload the groceries from the cart into your car. You're child would most likely enjoy helping. After you've finished, you can push the cart back to the store and have your older child help push the cart. After you have returned the cart to the store, you can then remove your younger child from the cart and return to your car in the same manner you used to enter the store. I think that would work for you.
Yes, but we'll forgive the nazi comment.

My other child is three and no she is not standing next to our car and cart in a busy parking lot "helping"...no need to forgive that comment as it wasn't directed at any one person as your lazy one was!

 

[tarheelmjfan]

I wonder why that is. I know a few people have said that there are stores where attendants are there to bring carts in. Here in PA, they send baggers out to collect carts, but not all the time. And the parking lots are far from flat! As a kid (and I confess, sometimes as an adult ), I would stand on a cart and let it take me to my car because the parking lots are always sloped. You just can't leave a cart unattended around here.

I may have been gulity of doing that a time or 2 in NC as well. Boy, these kids growing up in FL miss out on all the fun.

BTW, I live in the suburbs of Tampa. You guys are welcome in our parking lots anytime.

 

[tarheelmjfan]

Very few people leave their carts wherever in our area. But then we get such high winds and the carts just go flying if they're left out. I guess that they don't get as much wind in Florida.

Actually, the East Coast of FL gets more wind than we do. We get very little on the Gulf side.

 

[jodifla]

Actually, the East Coast of FL gets more wind than we do. We get very little on the Gulf side.

I grew up in Tampa, and I recall that most of our stores at the time did have corrals. (But this was back in the 70s...)

But none in South Florida or Gainesville....

 

[tarheelmjfan]

I grew up in Tampa, and I recall that most of our stores at the time did have corrals. (But this was back in the 70s...)

But none in South Florida or Gainesville....

Some do & some don't, but just like all other places in FL they don't get used. Most of the newer shopping complexes don't.

 

[DisneyPhD]

It is irritating when one says I can do this or I don't have problems doing that and I have kids. Well good for you!!! Each parent is different, each child is different and each circumstance is different.
QUOTE]


Such wise words.

I don't use my kids as excuses (make up excuses and then blame things on the kids that isn't true.) but in all honeslty my life and priorities are different then they were before I had kids. My family is my number one priority (I am currenlty a SAHM, but I did work part time before my 2nd child was born.) Part of my dession to stay home is so I didn't have to "pull the kid card" when they were sick or needed me.

In addtion to every kid family and situation being different, as we see even shopping experinces differ.

Oh and all the people who "park close to the cart caroal or the front of the store" must live in less densely populated areas then me or shop at less popluar store. I park where I find a spot. Parking spots are't very easy around here. I can't drive around for 10 min until one near the carts opens up. People often follow others walking out to there and car and wait while they unload, then take that cart.

 

[LadyBears]

I have also used my child as an excuse for me -
I use her as an excuse so I can "be a kid"
I bought the "High School Musical" soundtrack - for her
I have bought movies - for her
I have gone to movies - for her

I am rarely late - when I am, it is not because of her, it is because of my DH.

Holidays - compromise - kids or no kids, most people want to spend holidays with family. You want me to work Thanksgiving? fine - give me Christmas off & visa versa. Then next year - work & have off the opposite holidays, etc.

 

[In a hurry]

To be fair, I have used the "Cats Card".

As in, "I have to go home and feed my cats."

We used to do that when we just had our cat and dog too!

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I've haven't read all the replies (I know, bad me, write about me on another thread ), but I need to make coffee and read the newspaper...

Is there a difference between using kids as an excuse or as a reason?

In other words, I'm sure that sometimes people do use their kids as an excuse and they are not the real problem. But other times when they are late...again...it really was because of their kids. They were heading out the door and the baby had a leaky, poopy diaper (been there, done that) or projectile vomited all over the place (don't get me started). Sometimes parents try to build extra time, but then too many extra things happen. In which case their kids really are the reasons.

Of course sometimes the kids really aren't the reasons at all and before long they will be old enough to talk and tell on their parents.

 

[Disneyrsh]

My other child is three and no she is not standing next to our car and cart in a busy parking lot "helping"...no need to forgive that comment as it wasn't directed at any one person as your lazy one was!

Yeah, I totally agree with not having young kids 'helping' in the parking lot-way, wayyyyy too dangerous.

When the girls were really little (they're 5 & 7 now) I would open the back of the minivan and let them walk through to their seats, or when they were really tiny I usually had them in a baby sling and just strapped to me so bringing the cart back wasn't a big deal-although I will say that most of the time I would beach the cart on an island rather than trying to cross back over to the store-people never *ever* stop to let you by, and I was considerably less agile with a 1 month old and a 20 month old strapped to my hip and chest...

 

[Disney Doll]

What's the difference between a kid-related "reason" and a kid-related "excuse". I guess it's a reason when you do it, but an excuse when someone else does it? If I don't want to get a sitter in order to attend something, and I say that I'm not going because I don't have a sitter, that's the truth. I shouldn't have to explain my finances or my children's emotional state when declining a simple invitation.

If a company gives preferential treatment to parents, that's a problem to take up with the boss. My employers in the past have rotated holiday assignments, but allowed employees to trade. I hate Thanksgiving, so I always offered to work that day, or the day before, or after, or all three, in exchange for an extra day off around Christmas. I have also worked New Year's Eve and New Year's Day, since as an old married lady with kids, I wasn't going to go out.

There was a time when I had to come in late to take my child to school - for which I compensated by staying late in the evening (for which my employer was very grateful, as no other employee was willing to adjust their hours to stay later). I have worked on their birthdays, when I was pregnant, I worked every day up until the day I went into labor, and I scheduled all my prenatal appointments during my lunch hour, so I never missed work for any pregnancy related reason, except actual child birth.

As a working mother, I try very hard to never let my childcare issues or personal problems interefere with my work. Since I am a mere mortal, this does not always work perfectly.

Well, let me be the first to tell you that you are in the minority of parents who will schedule child-related activities for non-working hours, take a day off to attend a child-relted activity, or stay late if you come in late due to a child-related issue.

As far as my place of employment...my specific supervisor is pretty good about making sure everyone gets treated fairly. I am also not a child-hating ogre, and more often than not, I have no problem covering for a co-worker parent for one of their children's activities. I work most Christmas Days because I do think that parents should be home with their kids if at all possible, and my family will delay festivities until I get home, so it's not a big deal.

What I guess I have a problem with is that some parents think it is an unwritten rule that their desire to attend to their child's needs should take precedence over anything and anyone else. I guess their expectation that their family's needs are more important is what annoys me.

 

[Disney Doll]

I will be late on occasion, but I will call. I will leave a cart in the parking lot on occasion, when I feel I have no other choice. I will want off Easter and Christmas because those are vital holidays to my family/children, but I will work on New Years Eve and day so you can get drunk.

Amazingly enough, Christmas and Easter are important to my family too. I have parents and siblings who actually like to spend time with me, as much as yours like to spend time with you.

I also don't get drunk on New Year's Eve, so I wouldn't need you to work New Year's Day for me.

I also tend to have the tact not to make such a nasty, condescending, totally unwarranted comment.

 

[Michelle2]

I've haven't read all the replies (I know, bad me, write about me on another thread ), but I need to make coffee and read the newspaper...

Is there a difference between using kids as an excuse or as a reason?

In other words, I'm sure that sometimes people do use their kids as an excuse and they are not the real problem. But other times when they are late...again...it really was because of their kids. They were heading out the door and the baby had a leaky, poopy diaper (been there, done that) or projectile vomited all over the place (don't get me started). Sometimes parents try to build extra time, but then too many extra things happen. In which case their kids really are the reasons.

Of course sometimes the kids really aren't the reasons at all and before long they will be old enough to talk and tell on their parents.

So true! I was thinking the same thing.

 

[Wishing on a star]

It is irritating when one says I can do this or I don't have problems doing that and I have kids. Well good for you!!! Each parent is different, each child is different and each circumstance is different.

ITA!!!!


Boy, this thread is getting a bit nasty.
And this shopping-cart thing, and the working mom thing...

Apparantly the shopping cart thing has some regional differences
Apparantly the working-mom has some 'Employer' issues. (ie. Heads up - Blame the employer not the parent!!!!)

Why is everyone so eager to throw daggers at one another?

Now, I know that this is NOT the way Marseeya (the OP) meant it. But, when I for one see something like the Title of this thead, it sounds like nothing more than thinly veiled parent-bashing.

 

[Marseeya]

Now, I know that this is NOT the way Marseeya (the OP) meant it. But, when I for one see something like the Title of this thead, it sounds like nothing more than thinly veiled parent-bashing.

It wasn't so thinly veiled, but I didn't really mean it to get nasty. I've been getting frustrated with certain attitudes I encounter that parents are a special case in situations, and merely brought up the grocery cart and university classroom as an example.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Yes, Marseeya, you've got your hands full as a parent.
We know you meant well!!!

It's just that this whole, parent/non-parent/working-parent thing just seems to be too volatile and predictable.

 

[castleview]

I normally bring the cart back and I'm normally on time. But I have used the kids as an excuse to get out of jury duty.

 

[missypie]

I think that people with babies and toddlers should get a big break from everyone else.

My DH is a SAHD...however, when the kids were babies, it was truly so much easier for me, the "working parent", to run errands like picking up the dry cleaning...think about it...the mom or dad with a couple of babies in the car has to get them out of the car, put them in a stroller or something, walk in, get the dry cleaning, then repeat it all in reverse. Him having to do that versus me just hopping ouf of the car and grabbing the cleaning was an "excuse" that was totally valid as far as I was concerned.

It was always such a hassle to return the cart to the corral when my kids were babies. In Texas, in the 105 degree heat, you don't want to load your kids into the car, THEN return the cart...what if you would get hit by a car or faint and the kids would roast in the car?? So then you load your groceries, then take the kids with you to the cart coral, then somehow get kids ages 2 months, 3 and 4 back to the car????? As I recall, I shopped at Albertsons, which had workers who would load my groceries in the car for me!

 

[Zmsksirt]

I see lots of rationalizations for not returning carts to the cart coral or to the store. Teach your children well.