Do large families work well? 4+ kids? Tips?

[heart4pooh]

You won't believe it, but today I met a woman who has 9 kids!!!! All with the same husband!!! Their ages were 23,21, 17, 12, 10,6 and 8 months!!!! A wonderful woman, too I might add. She was very grounded and told me some people think she is crazy but she feels very blessed. I had a great conversation with her and will always remember her, especially when I'm feeling stressed out with my two kids.

 

[poohandwendy]

I only have 3 children, but am the middle child of 5 (4 girls one boy). I absolutely LOVE having a large family. We are all extremely close even though we all have very different personalities. There is always someone who is willing and able to help with ANYTHING. And there is a sense of comfort knowing there is always a shoulder to cry on, a place to stop for advice or just a good laugh. There isn nothing we wouldn't do for eachother. Our holidays are chaos, our memories priceless.

I know I can thank my parents for raising us in an environment that was extremely open to discussing ANY topic at the dinner table...and trust me...we had some very heated discussions......nothing was sacred, LOL.

I don't know how my parents did it, but they really made it look easy. I remember we always had at least 2 grocery carts...I always wondered why others didn't. We never bought less than 2 gallons of milk or 3 loaves of bread at a time.

I think it is more likely that one would regret having less chidren than more. Good luck in your decision making...and kudos to you for opening your hearts and lives in such a way....

 

[mommyseven]

I have seven kids. Our house is currently 3400 square feet. However, we did all live in an 1100 sq. ft. house. Anything is possible.

We drive a Suburban. We do go out to eat. We probably bring food in more than eat out because everyone has their own favorites.

When we go to Disney, we usually get two rooms. We have taken our RV and stayed at Ft. Wilderness - once.

Christmas can get expensive, but I have to admit that I over do it. It's easier to go overboard on birthdays and have a modest Christmas.

 

[hipporina]

Wow, there are more big families here than I thought! We know that we want a lot of kids, but jumping from 2 to 4 was a little overwhelming to think about at first. You guys have put my mind at ease a bit. Now we just have to wait until the 7th to see if we get them or not.

I have 3 sisters, but my littlest sister wasn't born until I was 17. The other 2 are 2 years either side of me. I think one of the reasons I want a big family is that we are all so close and I want my kids to have that. My sisters and their families, my parents, my grandparents, and me and my family all live within 2.5 miles of each other and see each other on pretty much a daily basis. I want my children to know the joy of having siblings they can depend on for anything and always being smothered with love. Our extended family is growing so fast right now it is incredible. Last year, we added 4 grandkids for my parents and if we get these kids, it will make 3 grandkids for this year!

 

[grinningghost]

DH comes from a family with 11 kids. He tells me it was very difficult when he was young. He says you literally had to eat fast because if you didn't, you had no chance at seconds.

They never took vacations except to go camping. They didn't get new clothes very often. And worst of all, they didn't get along very well. To this day, my DH only speaks to one of his brothers. ONE - out of 11 kids!

I was an only child, so I can only imagine what it was like.

 

[MelessaG]

Originally posted by hipporina
Now we just have to wait until the 7th to see if we get them or not.

Make sure and let us know on the 7th! I will keep my fingers crossed for you!

 

[missypie]

Please don't have a large family assuming all the kids will get along as adults. DH is one of 4 kids and none of them have much to do with one another. Of the 3 siblings, there is only one he likes. My mom is one of 7 kids and while they were all alive it was like a soap opera figuring out who talked to, and kept in touch with who...no one kid was in touch with all (or nearly all) of the siblings.

 

[snoopy]

I'm one of 9. I personally did not want that many kids -- it requires an enormous amount of patience and organization, neither of which is my specialty, so to speak. Having said that, I feel very blessed that my parents did see it as their specialty, growing up in a large family certainly has its benefits.

Since I've been away from home for close to 20 years, answering your questions isn't really relevant, but here goes. For vacations, we rented a cottage at the beach. The car we drove was always a station wagon, where a bunch of us would just sit in the wagon part. We lived in a 3 bedroom house with a big basement. 4 boys in the basement, 3 in one of the upstairs bedrooms, me and my sister in the other, and my parents in the master. For me, that was the only downside to growing up in a large family, there was NO room! LOL! I'm very picky about my stuff to this day, since I never had anything nice growing up, it was always destroyed by a younger sibling and there was no place to hide it. Other than that, life was grand having so many of us. If you have the heart for it, I say go for it!

 

[Az Pirates]

Originally posted by hipporina
Wow, there are more big families here than I thought! We know that we want a lot of kids, but jumping from 2 to 4 was a little overwhelming to think about at first. You guys have put my mind at ease a bit. Now we just have to wait until the 7th to see if we get them or not.

I just came home from visiting a friend who has triplets. She went from 1 to 4. (Their son was not quite 4 when the babies were born) Talk about someone having their hands full!

We also have 4 children. Most days it's wonderful - although we definitely do have our crazy moments. Having a good sense of humor is a real sanity saver!


My kids have been given more opportunities for travel, music lessons, sports, etc. than I ever was as an only child.
They definitely dress better than I did too.
BTW, what IS the attraction with Abercrombie?? I sure don't see quality materials or construction and the prices - yikes!


Our kids do all have their own rooms - which is nice as they have their own private space to get away if need be.

Do keep us updated on your situation.

 

[funhouse8]

Hi, I also have four children, but they are growing up fast.21DS,DD19,DD15 &DS14. I just wanted to tell you the best thing I ever did was buy a camper. When we go away we stay in camping resorts . They usually offer alot of activities for the kids and wonderful fun for us grown-ups too. Pool, Lake, Hot tubs, clean hot showers & etc.. We have saved so much money this way. ( DH says whenever we save money it costs him money) It sounds like your heart is in the right place, good luck on the 7th, I'll say a prayer for ya. Gina

 

[Kallison]

Nothing to add but God Bless You for giving those little angels a loving home. That is awesome! I'm sure it will all work out.

 

[mudnuri]

I can't help personally as I only have the 2DD's, however my mom is one of 9 and my father was one of 14. DH is one of 4 boys.

My mom's family to this day is very close, 8 siblings are living, and 5 live here, about 20 minutes from eachother. 2 brothers are in Montana, in the same town, and the rebel daughter is in Texas.. They all come home 1-2x per year, and usually there is one of either the kids, or my generation heading out to see them, or just coming back from there. (we spent 3 weeks in montana in 98)..My grandparents just celebrated their 62nd wedding anniversary

My fathers family was different, his mother died when he was 14, he had 7 sisters YOUNGER than him, that his father had to raise. They were very poor. Some of them still are. My father was the most successful in his life of the family, in ways of finances. Very money smart he was!...they despised him because of it, though he always gave to them etc... the family is dysfunctional. Many of the kids are/were alcoholics, and none of them have very strong relationships with their own kids

now, DH's family. First let me say they are full-italians....now most Italian families are very close to begin with, Family is the 1st....and these 4 boys, are the closest siblings that I have ever seen.

DMIL has told me many times how they raised the 4 boys..who are all 2 years apart....DFIL first worked for his father, then started his own business. DFIL worked 70-80 hours a week, and DMIL raised the boys, she also did the books for whatever company DFIL owned at the time. the boys, once old enough, worked for DFIL as well. To this day, we are at DMIL's at least 2x per week year round, and when we're there, at least another boy is there as well.

I am a selfish person when it comes to kids. With 2 DD's I can still live the lifestyle that DH and I have become accustomed to prior to having kids. Given any unforseen circumstance, DH and I will be able to retire young, and have $$, and DD's will have a hefty college fund, or should they chose not to go to college, a nice size trust fund. DH and I trade in our cars/trucks often, I am able to buy what I want for not only me but the kids as well, and I guess maybe that's shallow, but I am able to choose how many kids I do or do not have. Luckily I've been blessed with 2 beautiful daughters..

Congrats to you, I think it's an amazing opportunity for you, and I wish you the best.

Brandy