Disney Wonder Sept 3-7,2006 Part 2

[Piecey]

She wanted her son to have kids out of wedlock?? This woman sounds like a nutjob! I say keep the baby away...she's a little crazy sounding to me. Poor Tom.

Yep, I know! I couldn't believe it!
Tom's dad was a...well, let's not speak ill of the dead. So her marriage failed and she is one of those people that can't see that isn't how it has to be for everyone else, just because that is how her life played out.
She never wanted him to be "attached" to someone-- like kids don't do that, married or not!

Then we wonder what's wrong with these guys when we get them! Holy cow, talk about emotional baggage. Mine came with way too much, too so I can once again, totally relate. The sad part is, as you've already seen Patsy, we're the ones who end up having to deal with the repercussions from what they've done to their kids.

Tom's got more baggage from Iraq/USMC but he came with plenty from his mom!

.
How is Greg going to surprise everyone? :

I got him a rental car from Columbus (about a two hour drive) and we all go to my Aunt's (open door policy, as everyone pretty much has multiple Christmas dinners to attend, we come and go) his flight lands at 5:30. Anticipates being here about 8-8:30.

We found out my grandmother (last grandparent) isn't doing well. The hospital told us when she goes home, it's a matter of time before everything shuts down. She went home about 4pm today. When I saw her Friday before I left, she was talking. Now she doesn't talk.
I'm crossing my fingers Greg makes it home to say "Goodbye" but know him surprising everyone will be even more wonderful now.

ea

PITA ??

Pain in the bootie...

YES IT IS!!!!!!!! Any card we ever got from his family was to My Son and DAUGHTER IN LAW!!!! Pissed me off!

Ugh. I'm referred to as "and Tommy's wife"

Yep!

Yep! She will never be with the kid without me around (I love Tom but he's the outcast in his family and is always afraid to say something because he knows they're all opinionated and it will NEVER end if he stands up for me ) but I won't be making any trips out there to see her, especially with the kid.
If she wants to grow the heck up, she can see my kid. If she can learn to keep her mouth shut and say only things that are nice (something my dad taught me at 5!), she can see my kid.
Otherwise, she can wallow in her pit of misery out "yonder"...

Patsy: when and where did you meet Tom? I did not know our thread was still going so missed months and months of it a while ago. Would you mind giving a recap? :

How was your vacation?

Jan

My best friend (at the time, she's changed a LOT and we don't talk anymore Even her fiancee left her a few months ago ) works out at the college. Back then, the three of us (her, fiancee and me) were always together and she felt bad I didn't have anyone. She invited Tom (who also worked at the college) to her birthday party specifically for me.
History from there.

Good!

Don't even get me started!!! Mine are visiting us Christmas eve (during the day) this year. I hope it's short & sweet and tolerable!

OMG. I'm so sorry. We need to send Lisa a box of support.

 

[Piecey]

She is jealous

Oh my gosh, she is jealous.

Now I wonder how much of what Lisa, Vicki and I dealt with (deal with) was (is) jealousy.

And if that is it, I now feel so much more sorry for my MIL than I did before. Since she died I have come to figure out a lot about her which makes me pity her. She would have hated the pity and would not have talked about the "issues" but I would have had more patience with her %^&¥ than I did.
Jan

You're probably right. She probably is. I grew up well-off, I went to great schools, I've accomplished more already than she has in terms of school, work.
BUT... I just look at it like we took different steps. She still has a cozy place to live, wonderful doggies, a great son who is doing great in his life (job with the government, wife, bought a house, baby on the way-- that is EXCELLENT for 26 I think!! I don't understand why she can't see that and just be HAPPY for him. I don't look down on her for any of the crap I know Tom and Joe (my BIL) had to deal with and don't think that any of it makes her less of a person. I had crap with my parents, too... there was just always $$ there so somehow that makes it better? What a load of BS!

Note to self...
before marrying a guy...make sure the mom is not a crazy nutball loon.

Good luck with that.
Tom knew this might/probably would happen. Which is why he didn't tell his mom before we got married-- only after!

Morning all, I'm being a lazy bum this morning and am enjoying this time reading posts .

Patsy, hug to you.

Thanks, T!
I don't plan to go out of my way (anymore) to get out there. Especially not right now for Christmas, with Greg coming in for three days only and my Grandmother not being around much longer. I'm not surrounding myself with her poop!
I'm not going to withhold her grandkid exactly.. I'm just not making special trips out there and since my car is the only that will be able to transport the baby, it won't even be obvious when Tom shows up sans baby. My kid will not ever, ever, ever be with her without me... and if she even starts to say a word she'll hear several back!

I wouldnt.

Not a mommy (yet! ) but I wouldn't either!
It's not hard to bite your tongue (even if you want to say it, restraint is your friend!) and do things for the better of your KID!
That is what makes me the most upset about all this-- I could care less, the woman doesn't mean anything at all to me.
It's TOM that is really paying.

Baby is here.


Gramma Jan

Jan, that is WONDERFUL news!!! Congratulations!!

We sent our son's wife a DAUGHTER card for her birthday. I got the most sentimental one I could find that did not mention watching her grow up because we did not have the pleasure of knowing her or her family when she was a kid, but I bet we would have liked them if we had.

Okay, you're already lightyears ahead of my MIL.
She decided (AFTER Tom said "Patsy won't be in town for Grandma's birthday party, Mom) to do Christmas then too.
So I've been left out of Christmas now.

I can't say for sure she did it because I was gone, but I bet you more than anything that she did...

Yeah I'm gonna be honest...neither was I...
I know I'm paying for my education and you think I'd be like YAY SCHOLARSHIPS!!! But when you don't get any after filling out ZILLIONS of applications...it doesn't encourage you to do it every year. The thing that REALLY gets me is how they set up getting stuff from the school. Because of my parents income, I only got a little small loan from them and no scholarship or any kind of help. It really makes me mad cause my parents income has NOTHING to do with how the school is getting paid. What they need to realize is that some students are paying for it themselves. They should really ask that kind of stuff because it really does make me mad that they won't help me just because they think my parents are handling the financials and are basing everything off of their income.
I just wish they would realize that every case is different.

Yep. Same with me.
I started writing on the "Additional Information" category/area that "My education is fully funded by myself, my income is the sole source of financing." (This application asked what I made, too, which at the time was a measly $9k/year!!
I got a scholarship that paid half my tuition each semester that year and I got it again this year!

I know what you mean, but how many kids would say they were paying when they did not have to or did not want to. There are adults out there who would say, you say you are on your own and then we don't have to spend our vacation money on college.

We asked our sons to take out student loans with the understanding that we would pay student loan and parent loans back. They got no school aid whatsoever.

I don't think that kids would lie abou that, but maybe that is just me...
A lot of the kids who aren't paying really don't care. Mom and Dad are paying, why should they be deceptive-- it's not going to change THEIR life!

My brother had the same deal with my parents that your sons did. He got scholarships but by his senior year had lost most of them because he had attendance issues.

 

[Piecey]

....Miami Beach...
Kinda see my belly.

..and Royal Caribbean's private island, Coco Cay!
SO PRETTY!!

 

[JLSE50]

They just did that in our hospital and we are closing in 6 months!

Good grief!

That is an investment in what?

 

[JLSE50]

How cute!

YUPPERS




SOPHIE -- TWO DAYS OLD

Jan :

 

[JLSE50]

.....We found out my grandmother (last grandparent) isn't doing well. The hospital told us when she goes home, it's a matter of time before everything shuts down. She went home about 4pm today. When I saw her Friday before I left, she was talking. Now she doesn't talk.
I'm crossing my fingers Greg makes it home to say "Goodbye" but know him surprising everyone will be even more wonderful now.

so sorry

..... (I love Tom but he's the outcast in his family and is always afraid to say something because he knows they're all opinionated and it will NEVER end if he stands up for me ) .....

One time when that happened I asked my Tom why he did not stick up for me when his Mom got going.

He said "because you've never seen her mad..."



So, maybe your Tom is also doing the most loving thing by not letting it escalate.

.....My best friend (at the time, she's changed a LOT and we don't talk anymore Even her fiancee left her a few months ago ) works out at the college. Back then, the three of us (her, fiancee and me) were always together and she felt bad I didn't have anyone. She invited Tom (who also worked at the college) to her birthday party specifically for me.
History from there.

Good ending for Patsy!!

.....OMG. I'm so sorry. We need to send Lisa a box of support.

chocolate

 

[JLSE50]

.....My brother had the same deal with my parents that your sons did. He got scholarships but by his senior year had lost most of them because he had attendance issues.

They did not get any scholarships. none. We paid the whole shot. Private colleges too. But we wanted them to go where they felt they were supposed to be so that was fine. Since they are four years apart we got no deal for two in college at the same time either.

But, it's all good and we are Ok with how it worked out.

Grandma Jan :

 

[JLSE50]

....Miami Beach...
Kinda see my belly.

I have a belly like that, but no baby

......and Royal Caribbean's private island, Coco Cay!
SO PRETTY!!

Our only RCCL cruise the water was too rough to tender in to Cocoa Cay so we did not get to go.

Looks like you had a good time. Did Tom miss you enough that he wants to go now?

Jan

 

[JLSE50]

Yea or even if you write something like I dont like the in law part because you are more like family to me or something along those lines!! The in law part to me made it seem like you were only sending this card because you had to because I married your son so here's you card and your just an in law.

.
Vicki: check out my description of my family under my picture on my Facebook Profile. What would you think of that if you were Sarah? And if it is not good, how can I fix it? Thanks!!

(I am DISing on the RAZ in an MDs waiting room so cannot copy that from Facebook and paste it here. There is supposed to be a way to do facebook on a Blackberry, but I don't get how. Do any of you? : ?)
.

 

[purplern]

Ugh. I'm referred to as "and Tommy's wife"

I know how it feels!

 

[purplern]

Not a mommy (yet! ) but I wouldn't either! It's not hard to bite your tongue (even if you want to say it, restraint is your friend!) and do things for the better of your KID!
That is what makes me the most upset about all this-- I could care less, the woman doesn't mean anything at all to me.
It's TOM that is really paying.

Yep and they dont see that! RIch is to the point where he could care less. I remember YEARS ago we had a fight and he got in the car and left-guess where he went! Nope- to MY parents house!!!! So he feels more comfortable there then his family!

 

[purplern]

Good grief!

That is an investment in what?

They also spent hundred of thousands of dollars putting in a new MRI machine! Must be nice to be able to THROW all that money away!!!

 

[purplern]

We found out my grandmother (last grandparent) isn't doing well. The hospital told us when she goes home, it's a matter of time before everything shuts down. She went home about 4pm today. When I saw her Friday before I left, she was talking. Now she doesn't talk.
I'm crossing my fingers Greg makes it home to say "Goodbye" but know him surprising everyone will be even more wonderful now.

I'm so sorry!

 

[purplern]

.
Vicki: check out my description of my family under my picture on my Facebook Profile. What would you think of that if you were Sarah? And if it is not good, how can I fix it? Thanks!!.

That's good!

 

[JLSE50]

They also spent hundred of thousands of dollars putting in a new MRI machine! Must be nice to be able to THROW all that money away!!!

Are these expenditures the REASON they are closing?

Can these items be moved to a different hospital?

Are your posts on my Facebook page because I did ok talking about Sarah? Thanks for saying on here that it was good! :

Jan

 

[LCTsMom]

I know how it feels!

I can't even imagine what I'm referred to as.

 

[purplern]

Are these expenditures the REASON they are closing?

Can these items be moved to a different hospital?

Are your posts on my Facebook page because I did ok talking about Sarah? Thanks for saying on here that it was good! :

Jan

No we are closing to save Mercy hospital! I dont know if they can be moved.
Yep you did great!!!

 

[purplern]

I can't even imagine what I'm referred to as.

My son's wonderful wife!

 

[Piecey]

They did not get any scholarships. none. We paid the whole shot. Private colleges too. But we wanted them to go where they felt they were supposed to be so that was fine. Since they are four years apart we got no deal for two in college at the same time either.

But, it's all good and we are Ok with how it worked out.

Grandma Jan :

I love that your signing stuff Grandma Jan!


Greg's only scholarship was a state paid one, that everyone got with a 3.0 core class GPA and at least a 26 on the ACT. Your financial need didn't matter, EVERYONE that met those academic requirements got it- It was called the Promise and paid a pretty large chunk of in-state tuition.
Greg's class was the year it was pioneered (by allowing video lottery institutions to pop up EVERYWHERE all over this state ) to try to keep students in the state and encourage stronger academics and larger numbers of students attending post-secondary education.
It worked. So many kids went to college the scholarship is not anywhere so easy to get anymore.

 

[Piecey]

Yep and they dont see that! RIch is to the point where he could care less. I remember YEARS ago we had a fight and he got in the car and left-guess where he went! Nope- to MY parents house!!!! So he feels more comfortable there then his family!

Yep, I secretly think that part of the reason she hates me so much is because Tom was having lunch with MY dad when his dad died.

Tom's dad was a jerk to him. He never did anything with him. Tom enjoysmy dad's company and they were having lunch together (that was the day Mom and I flew to visit Greg!) but it's almost like she thinks that if Tom had been with his own Dad, instead of mine, maybe his dad wouldn't have died.

We still haven't gotten back the autopsy, but everyone is saying it was a major heart attack. He lived out of cell phone reception range, over an hour from the nearest hospital. There is no way, even if someone had been there, that he would have made it. Or so we've been told.