Disney With Inlaws....help!

[DISNEYDREAMS]

We are going to Disney in August and the inlaws are coming with us. They don't understand about the "booking things" ahead process and can't see to see how people do it. Then when I finally get them to understand about how priority seating cuts down on wait times etc. they think the prices of the places are too high. I mentioned going to Ohanas one night and they just about fell over with the price per person. I also mentioned doing Hollywood and Vine dinner before Fantasmic and their response was. "We should probably just do the show." We can't just break apart and go on our own as hubby won't do that and it would cause too many problems. They did manage to let me make a ps at 50 prime time for lunch, but I neglected to show them the prices on purpose. This is our first time taking the kids to Disney and I am afraid they are going to drive me crazy with everything being "too expensive". Anyone have an experience like this? I just needed to vent... thanks for listening and any advice to keep my sanity would be greatly appreciated.

 

[tlbwriter]

This is a good reason to get the dining package! Or are you staying offsite?

 

[DISNEYDREAMS]

This is a good reason to get the dining package! Or are you staying offsite?

I had thought about that, but yes we are staying offsite..at Cypress pointe.

 

[crisi]

Time for a heart to heart with hubby.....

Personally, this is me:

"Dear, I get really cranky on a week worth of chicken fingers and french fries. I really want to have a sit down meal once a day - perferrably at a place where I can have a glass of wine. Lets pick some restaurants."

I'd adapt something like that to your circumstances. If your in-laws are paying for their own food, there isn't a lot you can do to MAKE them spend money, but you and he can sit down and explain to them that you think a sit down meal every day (or every other day) is important to your sanity. You need to get you hubby on board first - making him understand that you want to do a few sit down meals.

Skip the buffets, they are per person. If cost is an issue, stick to sit down meals where you can choose how much you will spend. Disney portions are usually big enough to split, and you can do a single course (with a buffet you are paying with the assumption you will eat until you explode). Lunch is a better deal. You can spend what you want and your mother in law can have a bowl of soup or salad if the whole thing is too expensive.

 

[patrenoe]

I don't want to sound mean but you may have to do some things with only your family. Having in-laws (or anyone) complain about the prices for a meal may also extend to other things in the parks. I do feel for you. We have never found the prices for food in the park to be more than outside the park. You could also suggest that they split a meal if this would help them accept the prices for meals, although no one is allowed to split meals at the buffets or character meals.

 

[pyrxtc]

I'm going with my MIL and I feel your pain. I didn't even tell her or Uncle about MNSSHP cuz I don't want them there, I want my DH and kids. They kind of invited themselves and DH didn't want to say no. I already booked them a room and told them where to get tickets and MIL questions all prices but wants to do everything we are doing every day. We bought our tickets before the MYW tickets came out so we can PH but i told her it cost more and she said but how I am going to stay with you if I can't PH? So she will pay more but right now, she still hasn't bought tickets (she asked me where weeks ago) I got her a brochure fromt TDS and circled what she wanted and to call AAA but when she called and found out that 7 days were only $10 more than 5 days she didn't buy any. She was only supposed to be buying 4 days in the first place since that's all she'll be there for. Now I have to call her and rexplain. I told her about PS's I am making and she said we can pick when we get there. i was like NO WAY! My first trip there and she is making it harder to plan. I know some resteraunts, other family won't like so i am unsure wether to include them in the PS's or not. Aunt that is going won't even eat any american food! What's up with that? She will not have much of a choice when we get there unless she wants to go to Epcot for every meal. She likes vietnamese food or chinese food only. Lived here for 2 yrs and still never tried a burger.

 

[HALEYSMOMMOM]

I think you're going to have to do what we did. Schedule some things, special things, and say that these are imm. family only only days. Let everyone know ahead of time, so there will be no surprises and hurt feelings when you get there, and all of this can be dealt with now. They may not like it, but so what? This is a vacation for you, too! We scheduled some ps just for us, and the family magic tour, and the Halloween party, and anyone else going was just not an option. I'm sorry, but I think this is the only way you'll be Ok with everything. Don't make a big deal about it, just state these plans matter of factly.

We went with inlaws also, ON OUR ANNIVERSARY! And I don't get along with this woman! And my husbands brother lives near Disney, so now every time we go it is a family reunion and I hate it!! Disney has been spoiled for me! So ground rules are a must for my sanity!! Sorry, but I also had to vent!

 

[jeast]

We had previously explained to MIL that we wanted to be the ones to take our kids to disney for the first time (after she made an off-hand comment). We wanted to be the one to see the magic in their eyes. Now that DS is almost 5 and DD is 2, we figured it was getting time. Not long after, we found a disneyworld brochure in her car.

Although I think it's wonderful she wanted to take the kids, I just think it was a tad disrespectful for her to make secret plans, knowing that we wanted to take the kids for their first time. Also, I think it's more of a competition with the other grandmas than a true desire to please the kids.

After finding that brochure, hubby and I decided we were gonna go ahead and do it. Grandma wasn't real happy when she learned we had already made our own vacation plans. I guess I'm kind of small minded, but DH felt the same way. She had her chance to take her own kids (which she never did). The first disney experience should belong to us, the parents, if we want it.

I'm not against grandparents taking their grandkids, all for it! But it was our desire to take them for their FIRST trip. Yes, we're selfish, but this is OUR family and we want to enjoy it.

Okay, grandparents, flame away!

 

[robinb]

Someone has to bend here, you, your DH or your in-laws. My bet is against the in-laws. As someone said, you can't make them spend money.

I have been to WDW with family (both sides) and believe me, going to WDW "attached at the hip" with in-laws (or even your own parents/siblings/ect) is a PITA. Our biggest problem was both moms are late sleepers. I once felt I drove my in-laws out the door at the Mom Crack Of Dawn (10:00 AM ) and we didn't enter the MK until 11:00 AM! Of course, by then the lines were really long.

I think the best bet would be for both you and your DH to give a little. You should cut your PSs down to just a couple and he should realize that it's OK to do some things alone. Allow your in-laws to make the decision to join you for your meal, but reserve a spot for them anyway. If they decide that a meal is too expensive for them, you can plan on meeting up later. Or, they can stay at the resort and eat frozen pizza while you go back to the park/resort for your PS.

Good luck!

 

[jwsqrdplus2]

I am facing something similar. One set of my ILs (FIL and step-MIL) are bringing her 2 grandkids for a portion of our upcoming trip. I actually don't mind having them, and DDs will be ecstatic to see their cousins. However, FIL tends to be tight with $ even though they have plenty. They are staying at POP while we are staying at AKL. But at least they are on property; initially they wanted to stay off site. They have 2-day tickets (only going to be there for 2 park days), but no hopper option. So on those 2 days, we will not be hopping. They are not on the dining plan to my knowledge, and we are, but I can work around that also.

Fortunately ILs understand that I am a planning freak and I love WDW, so they will let me do the planning for the trip. Now I just have to figure out how to show two kids (13 and 9) who have never been to WDW (and probably will not get another chance) the best of MGM and MK. I think that will be the biggest challenge. They may cringe at prices for meals, but that won't stop them from enjoying it.

 

[Cheshire_cat]

Maybe get your in-laws the Unofficial Guide to Disney? They really stress the importance of having a plan, making PSs, getting there early. Maybe reading it in a book would convince her? Having a itinerary ready before you go would give everyone a chance to opt out of the things that they aren't interested in. Get a cell phone or one of those walkie-talkies so that if you split up during the day - it is easier to find each other. (And if it accidently gets turned off?? ) Hope your trip goes well! I too have vacationed with in-laws.

 

[robinb]

They are staying at POP while we are staying at AKL. But at least they are on property; initially they wanted to stay off site.

Unfortunatley, the OP and her family are not only staying off-site, but they are staying at a timeshare that probably doesn't have transportation. They will all have to share the same car to the parks and they will leave on the slowest person's schedule.

 

[tlbwriter]

We can't just break apart and go on our own as hubby won't do that and it would cause too many problems.

Okay, this is your main problem. It's not fair for them to have to spend more than they want on food, and it's not fair for you to have to give up everything you wanted to do. The obvious compromise is to do some things separately. If your husband is the only one preventing this, he is the one who needs to be convinced, not the ILs.

 

[iluvallthingsdisney]

Big hug for having to go through all of this! Try and educate your inlaws as best you can. Maybe get them the unoffiicial guide to Walt Disney World and get them to check out allearsnet.com. That way they can see and learn about menus and prices on all restaurants in the World. They will have a better understanding of what a hassle it is to go without any plan. Maybe you and your hubby could treat your parents to a meal or too, if money isn't too tight. Also lunch prices are much cheaper than dinner. Maybe a comprise of a breakfast at the hotel either in your room cereal or a bagel, or at Denny's or something like that, then Lunch in the parks or one of the resorts at a sit down restaurant. Dinner could be a combo of park fast food, outside the world restaurant like Olive Garden, Outback, some moderate sit down place, and pick one special night for a park dinner sit down meal that your inlaws may or may not join you at. Your parents could save money buy bringing their own snacks like bottled water, soda, chips, pretzels etc.

Maybe the inlaws could babysit one night and you and hubby could have a romantic expensive dinner alone. Let your inlaws pick a restaurant that they would like to try or seem interested in. That way they will feel like they have some say or control.

Enjoy your trip. Good luck with the inlaws.

 

[tlbwriter]

I'm not against grandparents taking their grandkids, all for it! But it was our desire to take them for their FIRST trip. Yes, we're selfish, but this is OUR family and we want to enjoy it.

"Sure, you can take the kids to Disneyworld. But you have to take us too!"

 

[mom2cinderella]

Anyone have an experience like this?

Oh god yes with my DAD! He and his wife were supposed to meet us for four days. They bought a one day ticket to Epcot, kept wanting us to meet them at places where they wouldn't have to pay to get in, stayed offsite and did nothing but complain about the shuttle service and actually tried to get an earlier flight so they could go home a day early. NEVER AGAIN!

Good luck! You will still have a magical time but you might want to practice counting to 10 and doing some deep breathing exercises........

Michele

 

[DISNEYDREAMS]

Thanks everyone for your encouragement and advice. I think I am going to talk to hubby and have us schedule a few separate things just with our family and if inlaws want to join in they can or they can choose to back out. I am thinking of suggesting they get a separate car rental also as they are not "morning people" and are always late getting anywhere. I think I will start practicing those deep breathing exercises and counting to 10 now

 

[tlbwriter]

Sounds good. Be sure to explain that this is not a way to avoid his family (and even if it is, he doesn't need to know that ), but a way to make sure everyone enjoys this vacation.

 

[Sollenberger]

As the MIL, who loves to take her family to DW - Let me say that we have another trip coming...in June, we are staying at SOG and my son and wife are flying in from NH, my daughter and SIL and grandaughter are flying in from NC, and my husband and I are taking our other two grandchildren (my other daughter and SIL dont like DW, so they LOVE for us to take the kids for them), now my youngest brother and his wife and 2 children are also coming...how I worked out the schedule was I made up our schedule and PS list, gave it to everyone and said if you want to join us at anything, let me know so I have the # of people correct - my SIL made one for her family and chose to join us for 3 of the days exactly, which is great - my son and his wife said they want to do everything we are doing and same with my daugher and SIL, except 2 evening she has special plans for their anniversary and his birthday and we are babysitting the 18 month old. I made it clear we have our plans, we are not offended if anyone wants to do their own thing. In fact the guys will golf some. Its best to be open, its vacation - dont let "moods" ruin for anyone or everyone. We are all meeting to enjoy each other, have fun and enjoy the kids.

 

[jeast]

"Sure, you can take the kids to Disneyworld. But you have to take us too!"

Yahoo! I'm all about it for the next trip!!