Dis Breast Cancer Survivors Part II -GAGWTA!

[MerryPoppins]

The funeral yesterday was a 2 1/2 hour tribute. We cried, we laughed, and we cried again. It was wonderful, but emotionally draining. Now we have a "fun only" weekend planned. DD wants to go to the high school production of Romeo and Juliet, so I told her she was on her own. I hate to do that, but she has a car. No tears for me. I think DH and I are going to Horton Hears a Who tonight. All I want to do is laugh for a while. Tomorrow we're going to a wedding. Hopefully, we'll all be feeling a bit more normal by next week.

Great news about being able to make the trip! Won't they all be glad to see you?

And Lookingforward, I'm glad you're feeling well enough to work. Bet you're looking forward to your trip, too.

Snappy, here's a for whatever is bothering you.

GAGWTA! I'm thinking of you all. Hope your day if full of sunshine and smiles.

 

[snappy]

Wow, quite a funeral!!.

He must have been a pillar of the community, doctor, scoutmaster, etc.

Good plan to have some fun this weekend. We are headed to the mall as DD12 has outgrown literally all her clothes. Saturday is soccer state cup in New Orleans (I may let DH take her and stay home and rest.) DH and I were supposed to head to Jazz Fest Sunday morning, we are reconsidering. Our energy reserves are tapped out already.

My friend Cindy who was supposed to join us Sunday will be disappointed but we'll shoot for going the second weekend.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Just home from two very difficult days of wake and funeral. I'm drained.

 

[NHAnn]

Linda, you've been on my heart and mind the last few days.

Laurabelle, glad you rebooked!

Merry, glad the funeral was uplifting.

Wishing you all a peaceful and happy weekend

GAGWTA!!!

 

[snappy]

Linda, how is your DH holding up?

 

[MerryPoppins]

He must have been a pillar of the community, doctor, scoutmaster, etc.

Very much so. He's from our town originally. Only left to be in the military and returned about 40 years ago. Not only has been a leading doctor, but also used to be chief of staff at the hospital, helped establish cardiac care unit, etc. And he was known to reach out to people in need, not necessarily expecting repayment. I've known him to pay off a mortgage for a widow who was losing her home, for example. It'd be wonderful to have the kind of money that allowed you to do things like that, wouldn't it? The earth lost a kind, kind man. And a terrific practical joker. Some of the stories made us roll, yesterday.

Just home from two very difficult days of wake and funeral. I'm drained.

Other than beind emotionally drained, how are you all holding up? You've been in my thoughts.

 

[sameyeyam]

Hi Ladies, was just perusing the Community Board and thought I would stop by and say hello! You can all give me 50 lashes with a wet pink ribbon for not stopping by and saying hi more often! I spend far too much time on the Disneyland Hyena Thread!!

I had my tram flap surgery exactly 1 month ago and I'm doing well. I was in the hospital for 5 days, expecting the worst as far as pain is concerned and was pleasantly surprised that it wasn't nearly as bad as I had imagined it to be. I went back to work 9 days after the surgery, which was sooner than I expected. But I have a desk job and can rest quite a bit. I'm still pretty sore and I had a little setback with my abdominal wound opening up a bit. But we have it under control this week and it's healing nicely.

I was very wishy-washy about having reconstruction. But I found a plastic surgeon that I was very comfortable with and decided to bite the bullet. I'm really glad I did. Even though I seen a lot of photos and thought I knew what it would look like, I was extremely pleased with the results. As a matter of fact the results far surpassed my expectations.

Other than my surgery, things are quiet on the home front. I hope to make it to WDW in October for the RFTC. But I may have to go to Hawaii the following week for a Best Western convention, so not sure if I want to do that much travel in such a short time. There is finally a non-stop flight from Portland, OR to Orlando, so travel time is now 5-1/2 hours instead of 8-10 hours. Anyway, as it gets closer I'll check in and see if anyone from here is going and hopefully we can meet up again.

Take care of yourselves!
Alison

 

[snappy]

Alison, way to go!!!!! Back at work in 9 days, that has to be a record!!


You are my hero!!!

I am glad the pain was less than expected and the results more than expected. No wonder you are glad you went forward wit the reconstruction. What a perfect combination!! Hope the scar healing continues. Don't overdo around the house, that contributes to stretching the scar.

Glad you found the right plastic guy, that makes the difference I think.
The healing continues for quite a while, I am still seeing improvement in my stomach scar even 20 months post surgery. It looks and feels better.

HOpe you do get down again this year for RFTC. Let's try and meet for a meal this year if you are able to make it, capiche?

I have my room and my plane ticket for RFTC. I guess I am there. I even broke the news to DH. No way can he go, too too busy. I am worried about him making the May trip now the way he is working. Not sure I can keep up with 2 12 year olds, DD17 and her BF all my lonesome.

Any volunteers?

 

[Pea-n-Me]

DH had a tough week, but he's ok. I think he just feels like there'll be a big hole in his heart for the rest of his life and there's not a lot he can do to change it. He knows it will get better with time, but for now it's hard to find acceptance.

Everyone's still in shock - it was pretty much the theme of the services. It definitely isn't anything anyone ever dreamed would happen. He, of course, was not only the biggest character in the family, he was what you'd probably consider the healthiest. I've known him since he was in high school so I feel like I watched him grow up, too. We had a lot of fun with him and his wife, including trips and gags back and forth. We watched his beloved dog when they traveled and I'm so glad to think of them together right now.

I understand what you meant when you said emotionally drained, Merry. Last night we were just beat. We've spent the better part of the week over the house (his parents live with them in an inlaw) and when we weren't there we were running around buying suits and nylons and such, things we don't wear too often around here. DH had the added stress of going to the funeral home with SIL to make arrangements, seeing their parents' and his wife and kids' distress, standing in line for the wake, and carrying the casket. The good thing is that both sides of the family and all their many friends really came together and felt a closeness that didn't require words. Lots of hugging going on. It was nice to know we were truly all together in our grief. The family was close before, but I think it's even more so now.

Thanks everyone for your thoughts about us. We had a good showing of family, friends and neighbors, too, which was nice. People have been dropping off food and gift certificates which was really great because I haven't had time to shop or cook, only for what I brought there.

Well off to soccer followed by guitar lessons. I'll shoot some pictures in between with my new camera. So I guess this is the part where we have to go on with our lives. Amazing how life is, isn't it?

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

Linda, you've been on my heart and mind the last few days.

Laurabelle, glad you rebooked!

Merry, glad the funeral was uplifting.

Wishing you all a peaceful and happy weekend

GAGWTA!!!

These are my thoughts exactly!

Snappy - I hope your DH is able to make the May trip!

Linda - Your experience sounds very similar to mine when DH's best friend died. Please know that you and your family are in our thoughts!

Merry - Sounds like a service Doc would have been proud of! I hope you can find peace in the good memories you have of your dear friend.

 

[laurabelle]

~~~***GAGWTA sistas***~~~

Alison- You sound great sista! No apologies necessary, but I'm so happy to hear your update! I'm so glad the surgical pain was not as bad as you anticipated and you are pleased with the results! Hawaii sounds fabulous!

need a disney fix (Laurie)

Linda

Melissa

Wow! Lots of God winks here ...just confirming that I got the Big Guy's ok to go to Vegas! I feel better today than I have in a long time...hopefully that's a continuing trend!

 

[need_a_Disney_fix]

I have learned so much about myself this week since Mom's passing. When Mom was with us and when I called, Mom would always answer and I would talk to her and not Dad. Now, Dad answers and it has quickly become so natural to talk to HIM. I know that sounds strange, but this is such a huge step for us. I make sure that every time I leave Dad's house I will tell him I love you. That never happened before cuz we aren't the touchy feely family, but that has now changed. After experiencing the pain of Mom's passing it feels natural to now say "I love you" to Dad. On Wednesday Dad and I alone went through Mom's clothes and boxed them up for the Salvation Army. He so wanted to get rid of all of the immediate memories ASAP. By the end of that day, I had yet another meltdown but its all good. I feel I did quite well through the visitation and funeral. Today, we wrote many many Thank you's and that was actually fun because we added our usual humor into the situation.

It tickles me so that Dad has already taken over ALL OF THE closets in the house. He also wants to change this curtain and that curtain...and on and on. In other words, he can FINALLY do it his way. Trust me, this is so cool. Before it was Mom's way and Dad did not argue.

In another week, Dad will welcome yet another great grandson. Our family has been blessed in so many ways.

Thank you for listening to me the past week or so. This particular group has helped me so much.

The fact still remains. Breast cancer truly is a beast and changes lives completely after the diagnosis of a loved one. Each case is different, but the same emotional impact is shared by many.

 

[lookingforward]

I have learned so much about myself this week since Mom's passing. When Mom was with us and when I called, Mom would always answer and I would talk to her and not Dad. Now, Dad answers and it has quickly become so natural to talk to HIM. I know that sounds strange, but this is such a huge step for us. I make sure that every time I leave Dad's house I will tell him I love you. That never happened before cuz we aren't the touchy feely family, but that has now changed. After experiencing the pain of Mom's passing it feels natural to now say "I love you" to Dad. On Wednesday Dad and I alone went through Mom's clothes and boxed them up for the Salvation Army. He so wanted to get rid of all of the immediate memories ASAP. By the end of that day, I had yet another meltdown but its all good. I feel I did quite well through the visitation and funeral. Today, we wrote many many Thank you's and that was actually fun because we added our usual humor into the situation.

It tickles me so that Dad has already taken over ALL OF THE closets in the house. He also wants to change this curtain and that curtain...and on and on. In other words, he can FINALLY do it his way. Trust me, this is so cool. Before it was Mom's way and Dad did not argue.

In another week, Dad will welcome yet another great grandson. Our family has been blessed in so many ways.

Thank you for listening to me the past week or so. This particular group has helped me so much.

The fact still remains. Breast cancer truly is a beast and changes lives completely after the diagnosis of a loved one. Each case is different, but the same emotional impact is shared by many.

It is so nice to hear from you. You have been in our thoughts and prayers. You Dad sounds like a sweetheart....my Dad just lets my mom do all the deciding around the house too....a true sign of LOVE!

Enjoy the beautiful new additions to your family. I believe with all my heart that your mother is watching from a painfree heavenly place.

 

[Sha]

Hugs and prayers for you all.

Snappy, when is the RFTC? I need to start writing things down, badly!!! Disney is on the Travel Channel again this morning for 3 hours. I missed the Friday episode.

They raised minimum $1000 with the scrapbooking yesterday for Nicole's medical bills. I didnt get as much done as I had hoped. I did do my invites for my 7 guests for pinning and graduation. Her husband was taken for a weekend away to go fishing with the guys.

 

[snappy]

I have learned so much about myself this week since Mom's passing. When Mom was with us and when I called, Mom would always answer and I would talk to her and not Dad. Now, Dad answers and it has quickly become so natural to talk to HIM. I know that sounds strange, but this is such a huge step for us. I make sure that every time I leave Dad's house I will tell him I love you. That never happened before cuz we aren't the touchy feely family, but that has now changed. After experiencing the pain of Mom's passing it feels natural to now say "I love you" to Dad. On Wednesday Dad and I alone went through Mom's clothes and boxed them up for the Salvation Army. He so wanted to get rid of all of the immediate memories ASAP. By the end of that day, I had yet another meltdown but its all good. I feel I did quite well through the visitation and funeral. Today, we wrote many many Thank you's and that was actually fun because we added our usual humor into the situation.

It tickles me so that Dad has already taken over ALL OF THE closets in the house. He also wants to change this curtain and that curtain...and on and on. In other words, he can FINALLY do it his way. Trust me, this is so cool. Before it was Mom's way and Dad did not argue.

In another week, Dad will welcome yet another great grandson. Our family has been blessed in so many ways.

Thank you for listening to me the past week or so. This particular group has helped me so much.

The fact still remains. Breast cancer truly is a beast and changes lives completely after the diagnosis of a loved one. Each case is different, but the same emotional impact is shared by many.

You continue to post such heartfelt and meaningful posts. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I hope it is helpful to open up this way. I know it has been rewarding for me. I am glad you have been posting here. Please continue to do so. I would love to hear of the impending births and how they enrich your family.

I am glad you and your dad have taken this moment to grow so very much closer. Hoping that relationship continues to grow deeper with time.

 

[laurabelle]

~~~***GAGWTA sistas***~~~

(need_a_Disney_fix) Laurie- What a beautiful post! It's really inspiring to hear! I am one who never lets an "I love you" slip past either. You can assume people know how you feel about them, but why not just tell them, often! My dad was never a huggy, I love you kinda guy either, but he is now. It's wonderful! Glad you are recognizing the blessings in your tragedy.

Sha- $1000 is pretty awesome!

I checked the Las Vegas forecast and it's in the 90's now, but will only be 74 on Thursday! Then 80's for the weekend. I need to adjust my packing!

 

[laurabelle]

I just emailed my dr. and he said the insurance co. claims they did not receive the appeal letter sent out over a week ago, so they need to resend it. grrrr.
So the waiting continues...

 

[piglet too]

I just emailed my dr. and he said the insurance co. claims they did not receive the appeal letter sent out over a week ago, so they need to resend it. grrrr.
So the waiting continues...

once again, I am so sorry they are acting like this.

Laurie ~ since finding out my Mom has cancer, I make a point of telling both my parents that I love them. Never really did it before, but now I want to make sure they know.

 

[MerryPoppins]

Laurie (need_a_Disney_fix) that was a lovely post. I am so glad you and your dad are there to support each other. And it's really cool that you're growing closer. Amazing how good things come from bad situations.

I said the other day I had a story to share with you. I can't remember if I've told this story before, but I find it very comforting. First the pre-story. When my DD was very young, she did not really have a vivid imagination. She was more serious and straight-forward...telling things like they were.

My parents had three grandchildren when my dad died....all boys. My dad loved the grandkids, but especially wanted a little girl in the mix. When he passed, my mom smiled that maybe he'd try to get her a girl the next time around. Two more grandchildren came along and we laughed when both were girls. But we never had a reason to tell that story to the kids. I wouldn't have wanted the boys to feel like he cared about them less. It was just something Mom said to me.

When my DD was two, maybe barely three, she happened upon a photo of my dad. (As a note, he had died before I was even pregnant with her.) She looked at the photo thoughtfully and told me that she knew him. I found it interesting that she hadn't asked who he was, but I corrected her. No, she had never known him. But she shook her head, and stated firmly that she remembered him.

She proceeded to tell me that he was a VERY nice man. I listened in shocked silence as she assured me he'd held her before. She remembered the day she was born that he'd held her. In fact, he was the one who had sent her to live with me when she was born. It was only then that she stopped gazing at the photo and asked me his name. "Who is he anyway?", she asked. She was pleased when I told her he was her grandpa.

I firmly believe my father was with my DD's spirit before she was born. I am comforted that he knows her and that he's nearby. It really helped me deal with losing him so young.

GAGWTA!

 

[laurabelle]

once again, I am so sorry they are acting like this.

Thanks. It just further convicts me to go on my trip as planned. Obviously nothing is going to happen between now and next week...

Laurie (need_a_Disney_fix) that was a lovely post. I am so glad you and your dad are there to support each other. And it's really cool that you're growing closer. Amazing how good things come from bad situations.

I said the other day I had a story to share with you. I can't remember if I've told this story before, but I find it very comforting. First the pre-story. When my DD was very young, she did not really have a vivid imagination. She was more serious and straight-forward...telling things like they were.

My parents had three grandchildren when my dad died....all boys. My dad loved the grandkids, but especially wanted a little girl in the mix. When he passed, my mom smiled that maybe he'd try to get her a girl the next time around. Two more grandchildren came along and we laughed when both were girls. But we never had a reason to tell that story to the kids. I wouldn't have wanted the boys to feel like he cared about them less. It was just something Mom said to me.

When my DD was two, maybe barely three, she happened upon a photo of my dad. (As a note, he had died before I was even pregnant with her.) She looked at the photo thoughtfully and told me that she knew him. I found it interesting that she hadn't asked who he was, but I corrected her. No, she had never known him. But she shook her head, and stated firmly that she remembered him.

She proceeded to tell me that he was a VERY nice man. I listened in shocked silence as she assured me he'd held her before. She remembered the day she was born that he'd held her. In fact, he was the one who had sent her to live with me when she was born. It was only then that she stopped gazing at the photo and asked me his name. "Who is he anyway?", she asked. She was pleased when I told her he was her grandpa.

I firmly believe my father was with my DD's spirit before she was born. I am comforted that he knows her and that he's nearby. It really helped me deal with losing him so young.

GAGWTA!

Wow, just wow!