Dirty Santa ideas for teenage boys

Ds16 has to get a gift for a sibling, I’ll probably do it. DH and I have been married 25 years, he hasn’t bought a single gift for his parents in all that time, that’s my job. Ds16 would be thrilled with a chipotle gift card. My daughters love shopping for gifts, they have tons of gift exchanges with their friends. My boys? Not so much.
 
Ds16 has to get a gift for a sibling, I’ll probably do it. DH and I have been married 25 years, he hasn’t bought a single gift for his parents in all that time, that’s my job. Ds16 would be thrilled with a chipotle gift card. My daughters love shopping for gifts, they have tons of gift exchanges with their friends. My boys? Not so much.

I don't know why her buying the gift would bother anyone either. My DS is an adult. I chose & ordered all the gifts he got for his aunts, uncles & cousins. He gave me the money. I'll probably wrap them too. He chose & ordered the gifts for his Dad, grandmother & me. He'll wrap those. DS works full time & goes to grad school. I stay at home. It's pretty obvious who has the extra time to shop & wrap gifts in our family. For the life of me, I'll never understand why people care what a total stranger does. The OP buying the gift for her DS has no affect on any of us whatsoever.
 
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Several posters have mentioned this. I'm really not sure why it's such a hot button issue. Seriously, he is a teenage boy, he has no money and doesn't drive. We don't live close enough to the store for him to walk there. So, I can either pick something up on my lunch break while I'm running errands or I can make an extra trip in the evening. Time isn't something I have a lot of right now.




I love this idea. I'm going to sock it away for next year (the nearest scouting store is an hour away and there's no time to order anything online at this point.)
Ds16 has to get a gift for a sibling, I’ll probably do it. DH and I have been married 25 years, he hasn’t bought a single gift for his parents in all that time, that’s my job. Ds16 would be thrilled with a chipotle gift card. My daughters love shopping for gifts, they have tons of gift exchanges with their friends. My boys? Not so much.

Then why bother doing it for someone at all? Why get a gift for a kid to give to someone else when they can't bother to put any effort into it? What's the point?
 
Then why bother doing it for someone at all? Why get a gift for a kid to give to someone else when they can't bother to put any effort into it? What's the point?


For the same reason I make him wear a coat when it's cold and take a shower whether he thinks he needs it or not. Because I'm the Mom and I'm the one people will judge when he shows up empty handed.
 

For the same reason I make him wear a coat when it's cold and take a shower whether he thinks he needs it or not. Because I'm the Mom and I'm the one people will judge when he shows up empty handed.
There’s always going to be difference in opinions. I think they are saying you could teach him to take responsibility for the tedious things in life to be able to reap the rewards in the end.

But whatever works best for you.

My in-laws completely phoned it in this year. They asked what my kids wanted for Christmas. Fine. I’ll try to give ideas. Then they said go ahead and buy the gifts. They’ll reimburse me. Now, I should just wrap them for them since they are coming here anyway and then the gifts will already be here. Very convenient...for them.
 
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Sometimes teenage boys need a little help when it comes to appropriate gifts and cultural norms. Last year my son’s Scholastic Bowl team had a Christmas party with a $10.00 dirty Santa exchange. My kid went to the bank, got $10 worth of rolled pennies and emptied the rolls into a gym sock and tied the top of the sock into a knot.. So his gift was a sock full of pennies. I don’t know why, he claimed not to know why either. The only good thing I can say about it is at least the sock was clean!
 
OP you got some great ideas! As far as people giving their opinion when it was not asked for, just ignore it. You don’t need to explain to ANYONE why you do what you do with your own kids.
 
In our family, we have just always helped each other out with a huge variety of things and never thought twice about it! Whether it was shopping for a gift, starting dinner, calling Grandma to check in on her, depositing a paycheck (something my boys have done for me multiple times) running something to the post office, running a forgotten item to school, the list goes on and on. We have always just helped each other out. My 26 year old son lives on his own and I still do things for him and he does things for me! (Last Fall, I had to have an unexpected medical procedure done. It was minor and done in the office, but I couldn't drive afterwards. My husband had just had his knee replacement done and couldn't drive. I called my 26 year old and asked him, if he could take a few hours off from work and drive me and bring me home. Because, we have always made it a habit of helping each other out, I didn't mind asking and he didn't think twice about adjusting his schedule to do it.)

In fact one of the things that I have done for him, is giving him gifts for his work Yankee Swap for the last three years!! They have their office party at the end of January after the Holiday rush. I have had leftover gifts that I ended up not gifting and have passed them on to him, which he has gratefully accepted.

Every family is different, but I am forever thankful that in our family we just happily help each other out. Something as minor as grabbing a $10 gift for a 16 year old's party wouldn't even be a blip on my radar!!
 
White elephant to me is the exchange where you grab the hideous painting your cousin gave you for your wedding and wrap it up to give away
You could have just told me you didn't want it, and given it back. Harumph! Two hour painting class down the tubes! :rotfl2:
Because he has no money, can't drive, and would rather just hand someone a $10 than wrap a present.
What about at least input ,from him? Okay, it's less inconvenient for you to just buy the gift, but what does he suggest? What would be want to get? And are you really sure time is so tight, you can't spend an hour with him, shopping and maybe a fast food dinner?
Probably because he's a boy. :P I still pick up the gift exchange items for my youngest, unmarried son who is 25. LOL
Respectfully, he's an adult. Let him be an adult. If Christmas shopping doesn't work for him, next year he could remove himself from the gift exchange, maybe? Not buying gifts this year will likely have people rethinking gifting him in coming years.
I always helped my boys with these things too!
Helped, sure.
That's hysterical ....... I would totally copy this except that DS would be one of the kids fighting for it.
Buy two https://www.amazon.com/Pyle-Megapho...ild=1&keywords=Bullhorn&qid=1576279158&sr=8-4
For the same reason I make him wear a coat when it's cold and take a shower whether he thinks he needs it or not. Because I'm the Mom and I'm the one people will judge when he shows up empty handed.
If he shows up empty-handed, he simply doesn't participte. If people judge you because he doesn't wear a coat, "He's 16, old enough to make his own decisions. If you have an issue, please discuss it with my son, not me."
Sometimes teenage boys need a little help when it comes to appropriate gifts and cultural norms.
Help, sure. Done for them, not so much. At 16, or 25, or 48...

>:(
 
There’s always going to be difference in opinions. I think they are saying you could teach him to take responsibility for the tedious things in life to be able to reap the rewards in the end.

But whatever works best for you.

My in-laws completely phoned it in this year. They asked what my kids wanted for Christmas. Fine. I’ll try to give ideas. Then they said go ahead and buy the gifts. They’ll reimburse me. Now, I should just wrap them for them since they are coming here anyway and then the gifts will already be here. Very convenient...for them.

Better than what my ex’s mom always did which was never to ask me or DD for ideas then waste her money on a lot of junk that my DD wasn't interested in and a huge stocking full of all kinds of candy and junk food despite my threats to send her the dentist bills!
 
Several posters have mentioned this. I'm really not sure why it's such a hot button issue. Seriously, he is a teenage boy, he has no money and doesn't drive. We don't live close enough to the store for him to walk there. So, I can either pick something up on my lunch break while I'm running errands or I can make an extra trip in the evening. Time isn't something I have a lot of right now.

It's because you (and a bunch of others here) are infantilizing their male offspring.

You keep making a bunch of excuses but the fact is that NONE of the reasons you are presenting stop him from selecting a gift which you can go and purchase. Coming here and asking everyone for suggestions is no different than making him actually come up with the gift idea - money, transportation, time have absolutely no bearing on that ability.
 
It's because you (and a bunch of others here) are infantilizing their male offspring.

You keep making a bunch of excuses but the fact is that NONE of the reasons you are presenting stop him from selecting a gift which you can go and purchase. Coming here and asking everyone for suggestions is no different than making him actually come up with the gift idea - money, transportation, time have absolutely no bearing on that ability.

Huh? I'm pretty sure that all I did was ask for a gift suggestion. So sorry that I offended anyone by doing that.

My son will not be permanently emotionally stunted if I pick out one gift for him because it is easier for me to do so than wait for him to hem and haw and take forever to make a decision. I promise, it's not a habit.
 
It is fascinating how differently people parent their daughters and their sons. I find it funny that so many men grew up with their mom's pretty much doing everything for them and yet then treat woman as if they are incapable of doing the most basic of things. I think that since your son is 16 and not 6, that I would ask him to come up with something for this. I can see going to the store and getting it since he does not drive. But I would make him go with me.
 
It is fascinating how differently people parent their daughters and their sons. I find it funny that so many men grew up with their mom's pretty much doing everything for them and yet then treat woman as if they are incapable of doing the most basic of things. I think that since your son is 16 and not 6, that I would ask him to come up with something for this. I can see going to the store and getting it since he does not drive. But I would make him go with me.
As a SAHM, there is no way I’m taking ds16 to target after track practice 12 days before Christmas, even if he begged. Something so low on the priority pole as a gift exchange is such a non issue in my world, I give the OP credit for caring enough to ask, I’d tell ds to take a 10 from my purse and call it a day.
 
It's because you (and a bunch of others here) are infantilizing their male offspring.
I find it funny that so many men grew up with their mom's pretty much doing everything for them


WOW!!!! "infantilizing their make offspring"...…….."their mom's pretty much doing everything for them"

Asking for ideas for a gift swap item for a 16 year old is a far stretch from "infantilizing" and "doing everything for them"!!

I dont think a week has gone by in the last few months where there hasnt been a thread asking for ideas for gift giving!!!
-ideas for elderly relatives
-ideas for a 13 year old girl
-ideas for the in laws who have everything
-ideas for stocking stuffers for teenagers
etc. etc.

OP said that her son has been to a lot of these Boy Scout gift swaps........she listed lots of gifts that have been given in the past.....I don't see the big deal in her starting a fun thread asking for ideas!!
 
It's because you (and a bunch of others here) are infantilizing their male offspring.

You keep making a bunch of excuses but the fact is that NONE of the reasons you are presenting stop him from selecting a gift which you can go and purchase. Coming here and asking everyone for suggestions is no different than making him actually come up with the gift idea - money, transportation, time have absolutely no bearing on that ability.
What if we like doing that?
 
WOW!!!! "infantilizing their make offspring"...…….."their mom's pretty much doing everything for them"

Asking for ideas for a gift swap item for a 16 year old is a far stretch from "infantilizing" and "doing everything for them"!!

I dont think a week has gone by in the last few months where there hasnt been a thread asking for ideas for gift giving!!!
-ideas for elderly relatives
-ideas for a 13 year old girl
-ideas for the in laws who have everything
-ideas for stocking stuffers for teenagers
etc. etc.

OP said that her son has been to a lot of these Boy Scout gift swaps........she listed lots of gifts that have been given in the past.....I don't see the big deal in her starting a fun thread asking for ideas!!

Oh I wasn't basing my response in the OP's questions. I gave her that answer. Mine was more of a general life experience that parents, especially Moms, do much more for their sons then their daughters. Ever been around any ethnic group? I have most of my life. And I have had a lifetime of being automatically judged as a "stupid woman" by men. I could tell you about my last car buying experience if you like.
 












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