Did you change your last name when you got married?

[Jennasis]

With my ex, I hyphenated my last name with his and made him do the same. MAN were his folks PISSED. When I kicked him to the curb shortly after we got married I RAN to social security and the DMV to change my name back. No clue what he did.

With my DH, I took his last name. I was thrilled to marry him and proud to take his last name. My only "regret" is giving up my super easy (albeit common) last name for his nobody-can-spell-or-pronounce-it Polish last name.

 

[My sister's princess]

I am changing mine when I get married next month. We want kids, and from working in a school I know, it is more confusing, and complicated, when there are multiple last names in a family. And for me at least, as the previous poster said I will have my married name MUCH longer than my maiden.

 

[lemondog]

I changed my last name, but I have friends who did not. In all cases, the children took the last name of the husband.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

I changed it but use my maiden name as a middle name.

Me too. I didn't have a middle name anyway.

 

[mjkacmom]

I happily changed it 15 years ago, with no regrets. I had a long, hard to pronounce name, but I also wanted the same last name as my children. We are the ******* family.

 

[Ephany]

I did, and I really regret it. I allowed myself to be pressured into changing my name and it still upsets me. My inlaws threw a fit about it, and everyone gave me such a hard time, I caved. Funny thing is, my SIL on that same side has never changed her name and those same people think it's admirable.

I've told DH if we ever divorce, as soon as DD's in college, I'm changing it back to my maiden name. Not only did I go from the beginning of the alphabet to the end, I went from a fairly unusual name to something common like Smith. It's my name in a way that this name will never be. I've told DD to do whatever makes her happy, just don't let anyone else make the decision for her.

 

[Pigeon]

I didn't change mine. Neither did dh. I didn't become a different person when I got married, so I saw no need to change it. Dh thinks its an idiotic custom and was glad I kept my name.

I've been married almost 30 blissful years. At that time, it was pretty rare for a woman to keep her name. The little old ladies who worked at the town hall were beside themselves and kept telling me that I couldn't collect Social Security if I didn't, and would be arrested by the IRS.

My MIL about had a fit and refused to use my legal name. For a few years everything she mailed to me was to Mrs. Hislastname. Dh and I asked her politely to use my name, but it didn't happen. Finally, I started marking stuff "Return to Sender, Address Unknown" and that did the trick. To this day, she'll introduce me to people and then say afterward, "But they really ARE married."

It has really been problem-free. Occasionally I'll get addressed as Mrs. Hislastname, usually by somebody at the kids' school, but that doesn't bother me as they don't know any better and schools tend to be pretty reactionary.

 

[Becky2005]

Changed my last name & it was an easy choice. I had no qualms with changing it. I really never gave it much thought.

Considering I went from a semi-complicated last name to a 4 letter, easy last name (although everyone always wants to spell it wrong -- they are wanted to ADD a letter at the end to make it a double letter).

I would give the kids the father last name -- just be prepared to be called Mrs. X automatically by the kids/teachers even with keeping your last name.

 

[puffkin]

I didn't like the way my maiden name flowed with my first name. It is much more of a "guys" last name. Loved the way DH's name goes so I happily changed it when we got married. I really like my name now.

If I had liked my maiden name there is no way I would have changed it. I think the custom is horribly outdated. DH wouldn't have cared either way, but he did want our children to have his last name as it is pretty unusual and his small immediate family are the only ones in the country who have it except for a small group of distant relatives in NH.

 

[Sgt Mickey]

I did't change mine and we have been married 13 years.

I never wanted to change it and he knew that but over the years it has become a very sore subject for him. He wants me to change it!!!
The kids all have his name.

 

[Jenvenza]

I did not change my last name and I am VERY happy that I didnt. I have an unusual last name and I have always loved it. I also think it is very old-fashioned to change your last name and I am not an old-fashioned type of girl. Our daughter has my husbands last name and that is fine.

 

[mickeyboat]

I changed my name an I couldn't wait to do it. My maiden name is German and 13 letters long. I always said I would only marry someone named Smith, Jones or Adams.

I didn't but I like my new name just the same. Plus my first name is a little unusual, so most people know who I am whatever my last name.

 

[Pakey]

I changed mine and have always regretted it.

When my son gets married next year, he is taking his wife's name because he hates his. I encouraged it.

 

[samshane]

I was not going to change it - but then I did because I thought if we one day had children, I wanted us all to have the same last name (and we did have kids).

So - what I did was to move my last name to my middle name (I have no other middle name - never have). For a few years I went by both (no hyphen though). And now I just go by my married name.

My maiden name is Smith - and even though there are so many of us out there, I didn't want to get "rid" of it entirely. My sister did the same thing as I did.

To each his own though!

 

[apirateslifeforme]

I changed my name. My maiden name was impossible to pronounce, even though it was only 5 letters long (and only had 3 different letters)! I also had not spoken to my father since I was 14...I couldn't wait to be rid of the name.

I am now divorced, almost 3 years, but I kept my married name. I'm used to it, it's much easier to pronounce, I didn't want the hassle of changing it again, and since I am young, there is a good chance I will marry again someday. A VERY good chance now that I've met Mr. Right! So I will change it again when we do marry.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I kept my own name. DH supported the decision. Our kids have his last name. Works fine for us.

 

[SpecialK]

I changed mine after five years of marriage and made my maiden name my middle name. I regret it to this day.

FWIW, taking your husband's name has nothing to do with devotion. It stems from the days when a woman was considered to be her husband's property.

 

[dislaney]

I changed mine but only because I thought it would be easier for any children we might have. I don't really think nowadays it is any big deal though, and if I had to make the decision today I'm not sure it would be the same one. I would do whatever makes you happy!

 

[Huggles]

My maiden name is Smith - and even though there are so many of us out there, I didn't want to get "rid" of it entirely. My sister did the same thing as I did.

To each his own though!

I was the exact opposite. All my life I had had to spell and then re-spell my maiden name. I got married and am now a Smith.....oh the joy of not having to trot out the phonetic spelling!

 

[Becky2005]

FWIW, taking your husband's name has nothing to do with devotion. It stems from the days when a woman was considered to be her husband's property.

I understand that but then can't the same thing be said about giving your kids the father's name? It just keeps spiraling from there. Kids were also once viewed as property if I'm not mistaken (or at least they weren't considered very high up on the importance level)...therefore by giving your kids the father's last name isn't it saying they are property of the father?

You really are just trading one male last name (your father's) for another male's last name (your husband's).

So to completely avoid the whole thing of where the names originally stemmed from, you could just get married and create a completely new last name that both the husband & wife use.