Did this teacher cross the line?

[punkin]

I wonder if she did this as some sort of protest against the no sex-ed policy? Nonetheless, it crossed the line.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

What different religions see as acceptable/unacceptable sexual behavior is a relevant topic for study in a religious ethics class

I agree, but the questions on this test were not related to the religious and ethical aspects of sex, but rather more about "common misconceptions". I think that's more of a health class discussion.

But the actual topics I don't think are crossing the line.

 

[luvsJack]

DD is 12 and in the 7th grade, if a teacher even considered asking these questions on a test this year or next--I would have their job so fast it would make their head spin.

If an APPROVED (as in school board, state dept of ed approved) sex ed class was going on that I had given her permission to take SOME of these questions may be ok. But even then they are not all appropriate.

Why on God's green earth is there a question about sex positions being comfortable? Why is that even something that needs to be discussed? I have had plenty of talks about sex with dd, but they are INFORMATIONAL, not instructional.

I cannot imagine what her motives in this are--but it wouldn't happen again, not with my kid.

All 13 year olds are not sexually active. I can assure you of that 100%. And the topics are very much crossing the line. At this age, sex ed. needs to be taught (would be better if it was the parents, but that won't always happen), but I really can't for the life of me figure out why "comfortable sex positions" or how big certain people's body parts can be are pieces of information that a 13 year old would need.

 

[DisneyBamaFan]

... I have had plenty of talks about sex with dd, but they are INFORMATIONAL, not instructional...

Ever see the movie Monty Python's, The Meaning of Life?

 

[Jennasis]

DD is 12 and in the 7th grade, if a teacher even considered asking these questions on a test this year or next--I would have their job so fast it would make their head spin.

If an APPROVED (as in school board, state dept of ed approved) sex ed class was going on that I had given her permission to take SOME of these questions may be ok. But even then they are not all appropriate.

Why on God's green earth is there a question about sex positions being comfortable? Why is that even something that needs to be discussed? I have had plenty of talks about sex with dd, but they are INFORMATIONAL, not instructional.

I cannot imagine what her motives in this are--but it wouldn't happen again, not with my kid.

All 13 year olds are not sexually active. I can assure you of that 100%. And the topics are very much crossing the line. At this age, sex ed. needs to be taught (would be better if it was the parents, but that won't always happen), but I really can't for the life of me figure out why "comfortable sex positions" or how big certain people's body parts can be are pieces of information that a 13 year old would need.

Depends on whether you take self-gratification into account.

But yes, I agree with you.

 

[luvsJack]

Depends on whether you take self-gratification into account.

But yes, I agree with you.

. . .

 

[NHdisneylover]

DD is 12 and in the 7th grade, if a teacher even considered asking these questions on a test this year or next--I would have their job so fast it would make their head spin.

If an APPROVED (as in school board, state dept of ed approved) sex ed class was going on that I had given her permission to take SOME of these questions may be ok. But even then they are not all appropriate.

Why on God's green earth is there a question about sex positions being comfortable? Why is that even something that needs to be discussed? I have had plenty of talks about sex with dd, but they are INFORMATIONAL, not instructional.

I cannot imagine what her motives in this are--but it wouldn't happen again, not with my kid.

All 13 year olds are not sexually active. I can assure you of that 100%. And the topics are very much crossing the line. At this age, sex ed. needs to be taught (would be better if it was the parents, but that won't always happen), but I really can't for the life of me figure out why "comfortable sex positions" or how big certain people's body parts can be are pieces of information that a 13 year old would need.

My guess would be that it would lead into a talk abut how some things are not comfortable and it is okay to say no to those even if you have said yes to sex (and that that no must be respected). I would not have an issue with that in a sex ed or health course--not in this class though.

 

[luvsJack]

My guess would be that it would lead into a talk abut how some things are not comfortable and it is okay to say no to those even if you have said yes to sex (and that that no must be respected). I would not have an issue with that in a sex ed or health course--not in this class though.

I am sorry but at 13 the lesson should not consider anyone saying yes to anything. In a couple of years, yes, maybe--not 13. Even then why is it on a test? I would have a big issue with it.

I am in no way saying that a 13 year old doesn't need some type of sex ed course. But how about we stick to being a little more age appropriate. If we don't WANT our 13 year olds being sexually active, mabye we should stop telling them its ok.

 

[NHdisneylover]

I am sorry but at 13 the lesson should not consider anyone saying yes to anything. In a couple of years, yes, maybe--not 13. Even then why is it on a test? I would have a big issue with it.

I am in no way saying that a 13 year old doesn't need some type of sex ed course. But how about we stick to being a little more age appropriate. If we don't WANT our 13 year olds being sexually active, mabye we should stop telling them its ok.

It could be presented as saying no is better but if you do say yes you can still say no to some aspects--and it can be presented as information to be used in the future--not now. And quite honestly--you have to consider that some people will say yes--at least you have to if you want to be realistic. It wasn't all that long ago that girls in some parts of the US were often married at 13 (my aunt was) and many are (sadly) still having sex at that age even now. We don't have to like it or encourage it--but ignoring it is not going to help.

My kids have learned about all kinds of things which do not yet apply to them. They have learned about the effects of various illegal drugs (along with the message that none are good and we hope they avoid them and these things never apply to them). They have learned about not ever driving drunk 9though they neither drink nor drive yet), they have learned the basics of handling income tax and retirement savings (though they are too young to work) ,etc. The idea is to teach them early on, while they are paying attention and hope it sinks in so they do have the information if/when they need it later on down the line.

 

[luvsJack]

But it has to be considered that, for some kids, this kind of lesson is like saying "its ok to say yes." And even if all of this were true--why on earth would it be a part of a test?

Just because girls used to get married at 13 does NOT make it right or make a 13 year old ready for sex or marriage. They simply are not.

There are reasons why some 13 year olds are having sex, maybe education should be focused on those reasons and fixing them not on whether the stereotype of the size of a black man's body parts is true.

 

[Jennasis]

But it has to be considered that, for some kids, this kind of lesson is like saying "its ok to say yes." And even if all of this were true--why on earth would it be a part of a test?

Just because girls used to get married at 13 does NOT make it right or make a 13 year old ready for sex or marriage. They simply are not.

There are reasons why some 13 year olds are having sex, maybe education should be focused on those reasons and fixing them not on whether the stereotype of the size of a black man's body parts is true.

It used to be right.

Times changed, and now it is considered "not right". It stands to reason that at some point (and I think this point is coming) where it may be reevaluated as far as whether it is acceptable.

 

[DisneyBamaFan]

It used to be right.

Times changed, and now it is considered "not right". It stands to reason that at some point (and I think this point is coming) where it may be reevaluated as far as whether it is acceptable.

Yep - sexual mores change. In fact, they differ greatly across the globe. Who knows what out sexual norms will be in 50 years.

 

[NHdisneylover]

But it has to be considered that, for some kids, this kind of lesson is like saying "its ok to say yes." And even if all of this were true--why on earth would it be a part of a test?

Just because girls used to get married at 13 does NOT make it right or make a 13 year old ready for sex or marriage. They simply are not.

There are reasons why some 13 year olds are having sex, maybe education should be focused on those reasons and fixing them not on whether the stereotype of the size of a black man's body parts is true.

I did not say it was right. I said it happened and sex at that age did and does happen and therefore it is inappropriate t not consider that possibility when teaching about it.

You can tech that they are too young for sex and still teach what to do if they go ahead with it anyway. Similarly, you can teach that someone is too young to drink alcohol but still teach what to do if they drink anyway (like do NOT drive a car, knowing how much is truly dangerous, knowing it will have more effect on an empty stomach, etc.).

 

[snarlingcoyote]

I did not say it was right. I said it happened and sex at that age did and does happen and therefore it is inappropriate t not consider that possibility when teaching about it.

You can tech that they are too young for sex and still teach what to do if they go ahead with it anyway. Similarly, you can teach that someone is too young to drink alcohol but still teach what to do if they drink anyway (like do NOT drive a car, knowing how much is truly dangerous, knowing it will have more effect on an empty stomach, etc.).

Amen!

It really bothers me when a parent says, in essence, "my child doesn't need to know about that/won't need that service so NO child needs to know about that/be provided with that." To me it either indicates an extremely narrow field of experience or selfishness. You've brought up a great point though - something I didn't really think about - just because a child doesn't need something today doesn't mean they won't need it in the future.

 

[luvsJack]

I did not say it was right. I said it happened and sex at that age did and does happen and therefore it is inappropriate t not consider that possibility when teaching about it.

You can tech that they are too young for sex and still teach what to do if they go ahead with it anyway. Similarly, you can teach that someone is too young to drink alcohol but still teach what to do if they drink anyway (like do NOT drive a car, knowing how much is truly dangerous, knowing it will have more effect on an empty stomach, etc.).

I get what you are saying, really I do. I have talked to all my children at length about the dangers of alchohol, the dangers of drugs, sex and everything that goes with it.

But, want to teach a child its ok to say no? Then talk to them about the fact that its ok to say no at any time--whether its because they change their mind, something hurts, or the other person's breath stinks. The reason does not matter, no means no. So with that lesson the only question that would need to be asked is "when is it ok to say no" and the answer is anytime. They need to know that they do not need a reason.

As for the 13 having sex or getting married, and others saying the norm was that and it may change--I would hope that in 50 years we have not lost all intelligence we have left. A 13 year old does not have the emotional or developmental ability to handle everything that goes along with having sex.

There are probably a million and one ways to teach sex ed. And no, you cannot ignore the fact that some very young kids are sexually active; but you don't have to just accept that either. They can stop anytime. And so with that goal in mind you teach them the skills they need to realize that. You don't say "well don't do it, but since you are going to anyway. . . " You say, "you may already be doing this but that doesn't mean you have to keep doing it". And even with teaching all of that, some of the questions this teacher asked were totally inappropriate for 13 year olds.


In reality, we don't even know if this teacher had any lessons of any kind going along with this test. She could just be getting her jollies by bringing this stuff up to these kids.

 

[DisneyScraps]

I am speechless!

Lisa