Decision to go from 2 to 3?

[llij]

I have two dd's who are 9 1/2 and 7. After the 2nd was born we were told that we couldn't have anymore children. I had always wanted a third, but was very happy with our daughters. Life was very easy with the girls and we were at a great stage with being able to travel lots, etc.

Well, this year we were surprised to learn that my doctor was wrong and we were expecting #3! My baby is only a month old, but we are so excited to have a third. Since my two dd's are older they are a great help and I only have to deal with one in diapers, bottles, etc. It is like having our first child all over again. I love being a family of five.

Good luck with whatever decision you make!

 

[funhouse8]

I have four also and never questioned my choice. But it has to be your choice. It's not an easy one to make. ages now 22, 20,16 & 15. We started out wanting 6 and stopped at four. When they became teens I was glad I did. LOL We love to vacation and when they were little discovered camping. This was one of the best things we did as a family. We own a pop-up and have been to so many wonderful places and no it doesn't cost a small fortune. You can even camp on disney property for as little as $35.00 a night. Keep this in mind. We only stay at camping resorts, pools, arcades, lakes, & very clean bathrooms. Good luck in whatever you decide. gina

 

[hydster]

We have 3 kids and fortunately or maybe unfortunately I didn't get to decide any of them and their timing. My first I got pregnant after being on antibiotic for quite awhile for a staph infection. That was fine except we were young and broke. FF 7 months after her birth and voila I'm expecting baby #2 and they would be 16 mos apart. I almost had heartfailure because I knew I'd have to quit my job and we were in the process of buying and rebuilding a house. Somehow though we managed with 2 kids and 1 income with a housepayment and 2 car payments. My oldest was 5 and my youngest was 4 when I found out about baby #3. I seriously threw up for at least 3 weeks, cried almost every day because my life was just getting easier. My oldest would be in Kindergarten and my middle in preschool and no diapers, formulas or late night feedings. I honestly was a wreck about the whole thing. My 3rd is now 6 and I can't imagine life without him although he has caused me much frustration and insanity in the last 6 years. Dh got snipped when the 3rd was 6 weeks old and at the time I was really glad he had done it but then I started getting the "itch" for more but knew it wasn't possible. It was hard to get over the feeling but most of it I decided were just entering the rest of my life with no baby coming in even if we had another "whoops". Once I finally got that over with I haven't had any regrets about not having a 4th as I know it would have sent me over the edge even though my brain was telling me I could do it. I remember my ob telling me *he was a family friend* that you can have 1, 2 or 4-50 but don't ever ever ever have the 3rd. Of course his 3rd was a rebelious hellion like mine started out to be.

I do have to say that vacations are much more challenging with 5. We always have to get 2 rooms or a suite which can be pretty expensive. As far as college and the other stuff we will deal with it when we get there. My parents didn't pay for my tuition and we have no plans to pay for our kids. They can drive the family cars when they are available OR they can work their hineys off to get their own.

As for the world and the situations in it I was having a conversation with my mother about this and telling her how awful it feels that my kids are growing up in such weird times but she then told me how she was going through the "hippie" faze with my oldest brother and how unsettled she felt then 40 years ago. I don't necessarily think the world is getting worse I think we just hear about it more than ever before in history.

Good luck in deciding what to do. My bro and his wife left it up to chance. She had had several miscarriages after my oldest niece was born so they adopted but never took care of any birth control since she was told no way would she ever be having another baby. Well 2 years ago she thought she had the flu and surprise at the age of 41 she now has an almost 2 year old and she said she just couldn't imagine her life without him.

I wish you luck in whatever you decide.

 

[kimwim8]

I haven't read all the responses, but here's how we decided.

I am one of 3 girls (I'm the middle). It was ALWAYS 2 against 1 in the house. I was usually the 1, but that's ok. Even now as adults, we still pick on one of us.

So, when DH and I were trying to figure out how many kids we wanted to try to have....I wanted EVEN TEAMS!! So we decided on 2. I wasn't willing to try for 4 after having 2 wonderful pregnancies and 2 healthy babies.

I got my tubes tied a couple years ago when DD was 4 and DS was 2. I've never regretted it once.

Take your time, it's a tough decision! Maybe make a list of pros & cons.

 

[mickman1962]

My DW's friend debated this and finally decided to try for number 3. She had triplets they now have six.

 

[mookie]

So glad I found this thread! It has given me a lot of different opinions. I am currently pregnant with #2, and this has already started a discussion in our house, and the 2nd one isn't even here yet!!!

Unfortunately, getting #2 was difficult. Multiple miscarriages, fertility meds, and now high risk monitoring and daily shots for a blood clotting disorder. This pregnancy this time around is definitely harder and more trying for me than the 1st...I'm already wondering how it's going to be when the baby's here and not growing inside me!!

With that said, we have always wanted a son. Well, we already have a dd, and we are not going to find out what we are having with this pregnancy. The deal was if we had another girl this time around, we'd try one more time for the boy. But with the way things have been so far, #3 might not even be a possibility if we wanted it. So, we are just going to take our chances, and see what cards we are dealt.

Would we like #3? I don't know. I still have to figure out #2. DH came from a family of 3, and I came from a family of 2, so we've seen it from both sides. I can say I would at least like the OPTION of trying for a 3rd, but that might not be possible, so either way, we will definitely be thankful for what we have....anything more than that is the bonus prize.