My dad's pendant is with Lifefone. They are pretty good. There's a box that you plug in kind of centrally located and you can silence the alarm on the box if you don't need help or you're just testing it, which they do recommend once per month. It has automatic fall detection. He remembers that part but forgets that there's a button on it too. It can go in the shower but he is so stubborn and insists on taking it off for showers. I keep telling him if he is showering when my niece isn't there, he absolutely needs to wear in the shower. He could fall and break the glass door/surround. I have to remind him that he spent 7 hours on his garage floor in winter. Ugh.
Lifefone warned me that we'll have false alarms and they were right. When my niece is there Mon-Fri, she quick hits the cancel button on the box. Last Sunday night/Mon morning, it alarmed at 3:00am. So they go down the list of phone numbers calling everyone and of course I can't say for sure by phone that he's fine so whenever they don't get a response, they send paramedics. They are given the passcode to open my dad's garage door to enter. Several times he has been startled awake by paramedics checking on him. I'd say it happens around once every 2 months.
I felt so guilty but after returning home 1am Friday am from San Diego, I could not adjust to Eastern Time all weekend. Sunday night at midnight I was finally getting to sleep and had to get up at 5am. When my niece isn't there to silence the alarm, and it's the wee hours of the morning, I have driven over there (2.5 miles) in my nightgown to see what happened. By the time I get there, paramedics usually have already left and he tells me I just missed them. With the alarm going off at 3am, I was so freaking tired I just couldn't. I figured either it's a false alarm or the paramedics will take him to the hospital and they will contact me. I felt so guilty but I just could not go all day at work on 3 hrs sleep. As it was I got around 4 hrs sleep. Wouldn't you know, I was on call (in case evening tech calls out) and sure enough she called out sick so I had to work 3 hours extra. That gets me home around 8pm. What a crappy day.
The dementia makes him say a lot of inappropriate things, sometimes very rude and hurtful. Sometimes he thinks he's making a joke but really it's just something crazy, off the wall, and it just wears you down to be around him more than a day. The one time I had him bring a cane with him to come to our house for dinner, he walked in and used the cane to poke dh in the butt and said, "Hurry up with making dinner!"
Anyway, thanks for letting me rant. With all this talk about caring for elderly parents, and after enjoying our 14 nt cruise through the Panama Canal this month, thanks to my niece being willing to stay 2 additional weekends when they would normally go home and have a break from him, I couldn't help but feel so fortunate to have her taking care of him. (So many of my patients tell me how they haven't had a vacation in years because of taking care of elderly parents.) I did pay her a good chunk for her added time there.
So today I booked a 4 nt
Disney cruise for my niece & her family for Jan 31. It was a great deal. I have SW points for their flights. Her husband & kids all put up with him so they're all deserving of it.
Last weekend, his alarm went off at 8pm. I drove over there and paramedics were still there. It was a man and a woman. As I walked them to the front door, the man said, "I remember her!" but didn't point to anyone.
At first, I didn't know who he was referring to. Me? His collegue? No, he saw a portrait of my mom on the living room wall not far from the door and remembered her from 4.5 years ago. He took her to the hospital twice before she passed away. I was so shocked I just stood there at the door & cried my eyes out. I miss her so much.
