Deathbed Experiences

[kilee]

Also, last May my husbands grandfather passed after a brief illness. He went into the hospital on Sunday and on Thursday my husband called me at work and asked me to pick up our son and come to the hospital the doctors said grandad didn't have more than a few hours left.

Unfortunately my work was almost 2 hrs from the hospital and I cried the whole way there. I love this man w/ all my heart and I thought I'd never get there in time.

When I arrived my husband was outside w/ a few family members and I didn't understand....they were all smiling and laughing. My husband told me that his grandfather improved drastically as all the family started arriving. The nurses told them they had no explanation and everyone should remain guarded.

Anyhow, we got to go into ICU to see him 2 at a time. My husband and I went in and sat w/ him for awhile. Just before we were leaving he opened his eyes and looked at us....we talked to him for a few minutes and it was getting to be time for us to leave....I was holding his hand and looked down at him and said "grandad you know I love you so much" he started squeezing my hand and rapidly shaking his head yes. My husband told him that he needed to get better so we could all go fishing together soon (that was our thing and the standing joke was that I always caught more than the guys). Anyhow he looked at my husband and said clearly (even though most of his speech wasn't clear) that he was going fishing w/ "XYZ" now and gave us a thumbs up sign. "XYZ" was his brother that was also a fisherman and had passed a few years previous.

We both walked out of that hospital room knowing.......he passed shortly after.

About a week later my husband and I were sitting on the bank of a pretty secluded creek we used to take grandad to. We were both sitting pretty silently for the few hours we were there w/ broken hearts. Neither of us were catching anything or even getting nibbles, I looked over at my husband who looked so devestated and I burst into tears. We started sharing funny stories of grandad from times we had taken him fishing all the while we were crying and laughing. Once we started the stories, I kid you not, our lines had started going crazy. We were catching fish left and right. To this day we say it was grandad putting those fish on our lines.

 

[AKL_Megs]

I think it is strange how some can "will" themselves to die, or "wait" to die.

My grandfather was sick with cancer, really on his deathbed. Hospice was taking care of him, and he was home to pass away.

Coincidentally, my grandmother had surgery planned at the time. My grandfather was so sick, just ready to go. My grandmother was in the hospital having surgery.

My aunt was living with them at the time, and when my aunt got word that my grandmother was fine, she went in and told my grandfather. That was at around 8pm. When she went in to check him at 6am, he was gone.

He waited until he knew his wife was alright to pass.

 

[Luv Bunnies]

My beautiful grandma was 99 years old when she died in 1999. She had been in the hospital for about a week and my mom stayed there with her every day. On Christmas Eve, grandma told my mom to go home and spend Christmas with her family (we live about 2 1/2 hours away from grandma's town). My mom argued with her and we were all prepared to pack up our families and kids and go there for Christmas. Grandma got very mad and basically ordered my mom to go home. My uncle lived nearby and he would be there if she needed anything. So, my mom came home in time for Christmas. She called my uncle several times that day. He had stayed at the hospital while she ate her Christmas dinner and then she ordered him to go home. She wanted to be alone. She died shortly after midnight on the 26th. We firmly believe she wanted to die alone. She didn't want anyone around her crying or fussing over her. She wanted to do it her own way and on her own terms. She was a very independent woman!

 

[Buckalew11]

I think it is strange how some can "will" themselves to die, or "wait" to die.

My grandmother died 10 months before her son, my dad. He had terminal cancer and she was old but had nothing *wrong* with her. I think she willed herself to die before him because she probably could not bear to live through losing another child.

My dad died 7 days after willing himself to make it to my parents 50th wedding anniversary. He was alert until their anniversary and then mostly slept for the next 7 days until he passed.

 

[simba928]

I have only had 2 family members die, only been to one funeral (my grandfather) and my cat was the other one that died, both in 2008.

My grandfather had been in and out of the hospital for as long as I can remember. He had several heart attacks, complete with open heart surgeries and all. He would spend months at a time in the hospital, it was actually a fairly normal Saturday when I was growing up for me and all my cousins to sit in the waiting room at the hospital playing cards or board games or whatever. He had been on dialysis for 2 years when he died (he swore in the beginning that he would "give it a try for a couple weeks"). The last time he was in the hospital, he had fallen at home and broke his hip. He spent over a month there that time. In February, my school's marching band went to WDW. I was in MGM on Sunday or Monday, standing at the popcorn cart outside ToT and I called him. I couldn't understand a word he was saying so I said "OK, Pap, I'll see you later." and hung up. All of a sudden I couldn't help but thing of when we took a big family trip to WDW a few years earlier and we were walking towards ToT and I was explaining to him what it was and showing him the people when the elevators opened. He got the biggest kick out of it. I had called my mom earlier that day and she said they were moving him to a rehab/nursing home type place, as he was doing much better. Anyways, on Tuesday after we performed in the parade at MK I met up with my parents and my mom told me he wasn't doing well and I would be going home early the next day. I was fine for the rest of the evening, my friends were so great keeping me distracted, until I was watching Wishes and all of a sudden I just lost it and started to cry. The next morning I found out he had died that night. About a week after his funeral I was at the mall with a couple of my cousins and my grandmother and I heard, as clear as day, my grandfather ask me what they were doing (they were sitting in those massage chairs). I turned around to tell him and there was nobody there. My grandmother still insists that he comes to her in her dreams and tells her what lottery numbers to play.

My cat is a little more interesting. I got her when I was 4 and we were inseperable from Day 1. I named her Sassy and she slept with me every single night until the last few weeks before she died. She died in November of 2008 (on my brothers birthday). She had renal failure so I had to give her fluids every night. Monday night I got her to give her her fluids, looked in her eyes and told my mom that her eyes looked weird. My mom didn't see it, though. I gave her the fluids and held her for the rest of the night. I slept on the couch with her, my mom came out to tell me to go to bed, I told her "no, I'm staying with Sassy". A little after 4 in the morning, she died in my arms.

This is where it gets interesting...Fast forward to May 2009. I was not ready to get another cat, I was still swearing up and down that I would never get another cat. I had just started working at an animal shelter and of course it was kitten season. We had a mama cat with 5 little tiny grey fur ball kittens. Kittens were too young to be seperated from mom, but for some reason I fell in love with this little family over all the others. They were the first animals that I really got attached to working there and that I remember taking care of. When kittens were old enough, I seperated mom and babies, babies went up for adoption, and all five got adopted pretty quickly. Mom went out for adoption at the end of May. End of June she was still there, so I talked my parents into letting me take her as a foster if I had to. July passed and she was still there. August rolls around and was debating taking her or not. There was a family looking at her the day before I went away for a few days. I decided if she was still there when I got back I would take her. She was still there when I got back and I was really torn about getting another cat. She started meowing everytime I walked into the cat room and (y'all probably think I'm crazy for saying this, but....) it sounded like Sassy's meow. I looked at her eyes and she had these bright green eyes (like Sassy had) that I had never noticed on her before or after that day. I just felt like Sassy was telling me that this cat was supposed to be mine. I took her home and as soon as I let her in my room and put her on my bed (she was a stray and I don't thing she had ever been in a house before, she had no idea that she was supposed to get on my bed or sit on any furniture) she sat down in the middle and stared. When I saw what she was staring at, it was a collage I made of Sassy right after she died (all black and white pictures of her with some quotes around it). She sat there for a good 2-3 minutes, just staring at it, not moving. Then she turned around, came up to me, and rubbed against me. She follows me around the house like Sassy used to. I couldn't tell you how many times my parents have told me that they think she is Sassy reincarnated. I have a baby gate up in my doorway to my room to keep my dog in at night, but let my cat come and go and the other day I went over the gate and leaned out to see her sitting in the hall. I called her and she came running like I have never seen a cat other than Sassy do. My mom saw it and said "If that isn't Sassy reincarnated...." I truly believe Sassy sent her to me.

Oh, and the new kitty named herself Mama. I wanted to name her Emcee (as in M.C. for Mama Cat), but she wasn't having that.

 

[emma'smom]

After a few back and forth trips to visit my grandmother as her health deteriorated at the end of a chronic illness, my grandmother told my mother (who lived 16 hours away) that she would let her know when it was really time to come.

So one day my mom got the call from my grandmother that she should come as my grandma had decided to go home to hospice care.

My DGM waited until all of her children had arrived, visited with them, made arrangements for her funeral (including paying for everything before she died), arranged for a caterer for the family meal, and even arranged to buy my uncle a suit. She also gave my young cousin some spending money for a big school trip (that occurred on the day of DGM funeral) and told her that she WANTED her to go on the trip and to not feel guilty about missing the funeral.

She had everything in order....and then she slipped away quietly with her family around her.

 

[weewuvvdisney]

In 1997 my Mom and Step Dad went to Disneyworld. A month after they came home, my Mom got sick and ended up in ICU. She had an infection that doctor's were unable to fight.

She was in ICU for 2 1/2 weeks. The entire time she was in a coma. We went every day to visit her. One evening, after we had left to go home, the hospital had called to tell us that we should go back. I was alone with my Mom and told her that it was okay to go. She stopped breathing a short while later but waited until we were all out of the room. I felt so guilty later for telling her that it was okay. I finally told my brother what I had said and he told me that he was fine that I had told Mom that.


We have a friend whose husband was dying of cancer. She spent about three days with him, day and night. On the third day another friend dropped by and she went to show this friend where to go to get a cup of tea. When they got back to the room, her dh had passed away. He was waiting for her to leave the room.


Another time, I received a call that an Aunt of mine had passed away from a heart attack. When I got home, I realized that my alarm clock had stopped working and was stuck on a certain time. I came to find out a bit later that it stopped a minute from the time my Aunt passed away.


So many stories here that can really make one think?????????????




Jan

 

[RNMOM]

A few hours before my MIL passed she was ecstatic about seeing the angels waiting to take her. She said she could see other family members too and was joyous. I was happy she felt like this as her last few months were such a battle for her.

 

[inkkognito]

My maternal grandparents both died in their 80s and were mentally alert until the end. My grandfather saw an angel in his hospital room and my grandmother saw a nun in hers...not sure why, as she was not Catholic to my knowledge, but she seemed comforted by that.

In our family we generally smell roses before someone is going to die. It just something that has always happened and that we all accept as normal.

 

[DebbieB]

My mom died at home in her bed. She had breast cancer that spread to her liver and she went into liver failure. She took a turn for the worse pretty quick. On her last day, she had been in a coma since around midnight. Around 3:00pm she started breathing quickly and then slow, taking a breath about every minute until there were no more. I was there with my 2 brothers and her sister, we were holding her hand and telling her to go to my dad and her family (parents, sister, niece). When she first died, her teeth were clenched and her eyes were open, she looked scared. About 5 or 10 minutes later while we were waiting for the hospice nurse to come to pronouce her, I looked at her and she had a smile on her face! I like to think that is when she went to heaven and saw my dad and her family. People at the funeral said they thought she looked peaceful and I had to agree. She was finally free of suffering.

 

[IDoDis]

When my DH's great grandmother was on her death bed, the adult children and great grandchildren were at her bedside. She opened her eyes and started singing a church hymn. Her eyes were bright and she was smiling. In the middle of a line, she took her last breath and died. The family still talks about that day which was almost 40 years ago. She was a very religious woman and never doubted for a second where she was going.

 

[ElliePeters]

This is a long story so I will condense:

Several years ago DH and I were in a church group. One woman in the group mother passed away and she shared this with us. The day before her mom died they thought she slipped into a coma. She was in this 'state' for several hours and suddenly woke up. The first thing she said was "what am I doing back here?". She told her DD that she had been in heaven. She talked about the things she saw-many details, not enough post space to go into it-but the most memorable one for me was she saw children waiting to go to earth and they were picking the families they wanted to live with.

Fast forward about 5 years and we were at a party for work, in another town, in another state. One of the wives was talking about kids and some of the strange things they say. She was telling us her then 3 year old son was talking about when he was in heaven and didn't want to go live with them but God told him it would be ok so he went. .

Its possible. Faith is a strong thing, and none of us know what will be waiting for us until we are face to face with him ourselves.

 

[ElliePeters]

My maternal grandparents both died in their 80s and were mentally alert until the end. My grandfather saw an angel in his hospital room and my grandmother saw a nun in hers...not sure why, as she was not Catholic to my knowledge, but she seemed comforted by that.

In our family we generally smell roses before someone is going to die. It just something that has always happened and that we all accept as normal.

The roses thing is so sweet. I believe we will have someone guide us to the other side so that the transistion is easier.

 

[aprilvaca04]

My mothr in law had been battling cancer for sometime now. She was at my BIL's home as she had asked to go home. She was receiving hopsice care and they had told us it wouldn't be much longer. All of her children and other relatives had gathered to see her. At one point it had been a few of her children in there (she had 9) with her and they were talking to her and letting her know that it was okay if she needed to be done fighting, she had put up a great fight. If she was tired she could just let go, etc. Earlier she had been telling them that when she gets to heaven the angels will be there playing trumpets and it would be the most beautiful music she's ever heard.
While this was all going on noone had seen her 3 yr old grandson enter the room, he came in and started to ring the bell they had by her bedside. As he did this she took her last breath. I think it was the music she had hoped to hear. Heaven certainly got another angel that day