Dear Diary/Journal/Blog

[Vannah]

Today I started my own private blog on my Microscoft word program, for my eyes only, and it got me wondering if anyone else kept a diary/journal or blog? If you do, how often do you write in it? What do you write about?

I'm still working on the about me stuff right now...

 

[Hollister]

we are forced to do stuff like this in english class. its really fun, try doing it with some coffee and in the morning. it feels like you're at work.

 

[DollfieDreams]

i have one on lj. basically it just keeps track of junk i cant remember like lists or short stories.

 

[tinkerbell12]

i have one on lj. basically it just keeps track of junk i cant remember like lists or short stories.

hahaha

I have a story that's based on one i was going to start... never got around to my journal, got around to the story though.... wanna see it?

Don't make fun of it, OK?

Dear Diary, 9/23/05
Today my foster mother bought me a diary. This is not the first time I’ve had a diary though. My other foster moms and dads have bought me some before. This is my 8th foster home. I am a whopping 12 years old. This diary might actually come in useful. I think that I can use this more. I hope that this diary gets published someday because I know the information in this will be so spectacular that everyone will want to read it. This is my first on the computer diary. This foster family is rich enough to actually have a computer.

My foster family, if you were wondering, consists of a mother, a father, a son, and two daughters. If you count me, three daughters. An interesting fact is that one of the daughters and the son are both foster children. Only the son and one daughter have been adopted. Therefore, the one foster daughter and the foster son are actually part of this complex family. They do have a girl of their own though. I don’t think they want more children though. They tell us we are enough!

If you understood that, you will be able to read on. If you didn’t don’t even try to read on. My life is so confusing! I advise you to drop this diary, if it is even published, which is my dream, because you are about to be taken by surprise. This diary will consist of my past life and my future life when it is not future, when it is present. Do you understand that because if you don’t that is clearly a possibility that someday, you will be able to read it. But friend, this day is not someday. In fact, it is today.

So, on to my past. When I was born, it was in the Philippines. My father was one of the army. He was there because he once wanted to go to the Philippines. The Philippines thought that he would be a great army man, so there he took the job of an army man. Later, my mother went on a vacation to the Philippines and met my father during a tour. They had love at first sight. Pretty soon it was time for my mother to go home. Right before the plane ride came me. My mother’s mother, my grandmother, had told my mother no more babies. My aunt had 10 kids already. So my mother put me into foster care and over time I have ended up here.

I only know that much about my birth because my mother had written a note and stuck it with me. Over the years, I have had kind foster parents that actually let me keep the note. That note laid next to me as I wrote that information. I can see this diary might work, as I have written more in this than ever.

Today I am going to visit old people with my friend, Laura. Oh my! I have forgotten to tell you my name. My name is Lilly. I know that you might think it strange, but I personally like it. If I had to choose another name, it would be no different. That is such a unique name. If there is origin of my name, I don’t know it.

My current family’s names are as follows:
Mom – Rose
Dad – Michael
Son/brother – Todd – 10
Born to Rose and Michael – Sister – Molly - 8
Other foster girl – Sara – 16

Sara has been here for 10 years. She was adopted at age 7. She was here as a foster child for 3 years before she was adopted. Personally, I’d like to stay and live here. These people are so kind and nice.


Dear Diary, 9-24-05

Yesterday was so much fun! Laura and I were having a ball with all those old people. Who thought old people could be so much fun? I know yesterday was all about my family, but today…. This entry will be about what I did and what I do.

I go to Miguel Middle School. It is just past Route 1096542. If you don’t know where that is, don’t worry, neither do I. OK so yesterday it was a weekend and I had no homework. My foster mother Rose told me to do a service project or something so me and Laura went to Old People Home. Well, it is not really called that but that is what me and Laura call it. Old People Home is actually called Home For The Loved. Neither me or Laura know why though.

I think that tomorrow Laura and I are seeing a new movie…. I think it has a new actor…. Jack Sparrow in it or something. No, no… not him… he has been in quite a few movies…… well, anyway, I am seeing a movie tomorrow.

Oh! I remember! We are seeing Ella Enchanted. Only, it is not in the movie theater. It is at Laura’s house. I am excited. Never seen that movie before.

Tonight Sara is having a group of friends over for a sleepover. As you can tell, diary, being a foster child isn’t like I have a problem, I just don’t have a permanent house or family. Oh, well I got to go… about to have dinner.


Dear Diary, 9-26-05

Ella Enchanted was a great movie! I can’t believe that I actually saw it. The movie was great!

Yesterday I was annoying Sara and her friends. It turned out she had a bash or something. That is what she calls it. I was ruining it and then Rose made me go do something. So… yea…. It was a little boring. I went and watched the new show that is out.... Shauna New Jersey. It is a pretty good show. It is about a pop star that disguises herself for school as a pop star. She is not really a pop star though. So, although I don’t know how she got her whole class to think she was a pop star, she did somehow…


Dear Diary, 9-27-05

I think that Shauna sings in front of her class and even though she stinks, they think she is a pop star. I am going to have Laura write some because I have to go to the restroom. Ok. My

Sorry! Jeesh! Lilly made me skip a line. Whatever! My name is Laura and I am a big fan of the Shauna New Jersey show. She is awesome. Lilly is my best friend with only ONE flaw in her. Here is the one thing I don’t like about Lilly: She is always w

Omg! It was time for Laura to go home. I wonder what she was going to write! That is like really weird! I hope it wasn’t too bad! Oh no! What if she didn’t like me even! That would be horrid! We have been together for 1 whole year! The longest I’ve ever been friends with anyone! I have to go call her and ask what she was going to write.


Dear Diary, 9-28-05

This is the worst day of my life. I actually had something! A friend… someone that cared. Then…. They take me away. They ruin all that I had. My hopes, dreams, gone. All in one day… I can’t believe it. Why did I have to move? I liked that home. It was kind and I had a friend! My life feels like it will end. I know I have felt that way before, but never like this. I have never really had a friend before. I think I should dump this diary. Just because Rose and Michael had saved this to a stick, memory stick I think, doesn’t mean I have to pursue it…. Does it? I mean, if my new home doesn’t have a computer, what’ll I do? I think… it better…. I hope…. My hope is lost. Nothing I can do now will let me see Laura or Rose or even Sara again. I can’t believe it……. I liked that family… All gone… down the drain like old milk.


Dear Diary, 9-29-05

I don’t like my new family. They are so strict! I have to:
Go to bed at 8:00 p.m.
Eat healthy, there is nothing junk-y in their cabinet!
Clean my room before doing ANYTHING!

If I have to live with this family, I am getting tips from my poor poor fellow foster sisters and brothers. I don’t even know how many there are. Like 8 girls and 6 boys I think is what she said. I know the mom’s name is Lisa and the dad’s name is George. I don’t know why or how this house runs on those rules… there are even more that I don’t know yet I bet! Man… they only let me have a computer in my room because it is a. old and b. what the lady in charge of getting me a home said!

I have a feeling that this is going to be one tough spot to live. I am going to cause trouble. They might not like that. In fact I know they will not like that. Give it five days, maybe six. I’ll be outta here before a week, before I will even have time to make a friend… before… before I know it.


Dear Diary, 10-1-05

Sorry I haven’t written, just trying to be in trouble makes me grounded from my computer. I have to get out of this house. The people are evil and out to get me. I know it. If there were a place that would be better than here, it would be anywhere. I am going to call my “placer” or social worker and ask to be moved. I know she’ll move me, I just know it.


Dear Diary, 10-2-05

She said I am moving! She’s gotta find a place, but I am moving! Whoop-ie! This new place will be good, I just know it. Though, I am still with Lisa and George, I feel better already. Lisa and George don’t know I am moving though. I am so glad I have a good “placer”

I have not told my new family about the note that has the information about my mother. I will not and I will never show them. I don’t think they would let me keep it. They are, after all, that kind of family.

Dear Diary, 10-3-05

My “placer” said the new family lives in Florida. This new family only has one person in it. My “placer” says this family is nice. She won’t tell me anymore about it though! I am so excited!!!!

There is this new show out, Will of the Past or something. Well, it is good. And then there is Shizzi McLiar. That is a weird show. I haven’t watched it a lot though. It sounds good though. Oh, I am so excited. I can’t wait! Let me save this to my stick now….

Dear Diary, 10-4-05

My placer (no “” around placer anymore!) gave me a Laptop for me and this diary, I guess I’ll be pursuing this then! You’ll never guess what I am doing right now! (besides typing) I am riding in a plane to Florida! I am so ecstatic! I really want to meet my new home and family. I wonder if they are nice…. Or s/he because I don’t know if it is a woman or man. Laugh Out Loud. LOL. Anyway. Oh! Time to put our electronics away. My… oh my… don’t want to. All right.

Dear Diary, 10-5-05

My new family is so nice!! Her name is Miranda and she is 30. She let me have my laptop in my room. She is going to home school me and I think we will have a lot of fun. She is taking me to a beach today. She lives right on a beach! Isn’t that awesome? I know!!!! Well, I have to go get ready for the beach. Oh no! I don’t have a swim suit. Oh well, I bet Miranda will purchase one for me!

Dear Diary, 10-6-05

I think Miranda rocks! Tomorrow we are going camping in her MOTORHOME! I can’t believe it. Do you know where we are going camping? In California. I know it is a long way, but that is where Laura went. Oh how I miss Laura and it has only been a week about. My, how much has happened in a week. I do feel like this home is right for me though. I do know this much, last time I liked a place, I was moved, so yea… can’t get my hopes up too much, now can I?

Dear Diary, 10-7-05

We are on the road and I like it so it is fun. I also like how we have a bathroom in the camper. It is so nice. It is truly funny watching little Miranda driving the HUGE motor home. It is like Wow!! If I had to pick another place to be with another person, it’d be nowhere. This is exactly like I like it. I mean, some places better than others, but none as good as this place… (so far) I can’t wait to get there though… sad as it seems, I might not get to see Laura.

Dear Diary, 10-8-05

I wonder if we will get there soon. I am not sure how Miranda will reply to that question so I’ll leave it. The road is a little rocky now and we are not much past the Mississippi. Although, I think this is a lovely trip, I have a feeling me placer was supposed to know about this. I am not sure she does. Oh well. Miranda seems responsible. Unless, she has been responsible. Oh! How could I think such things? How horrid of me. Oh, we are taking a rest stop. I wonder if I can get candy… I’ll ask!

Dear Diary, 10-9-05

I had the guts to ask Miranda and yea, we’ll get there in two more days. I can’t wait! This is so exciting. A four day trip! Wow that’s a lot. Well, I did get candy yesterday, Gob Stoppers or what ever they are called. Tomorrow we will meet one of Miranda’s friends at a mall or something. It is in Nevada. I am broke so I asked Miranda for some money and she game me $100. I think just for that mall though! I like having Miranda as a parent because she is more of an older sister. Not like an older sister like Sara was. I don’t really know how to explain it.

Dear Diary, 10-10-05

We are at an RV park right now and I have to charge my battery. Ok I plugged it in so yea I don’t really have anything to write. Oh, the mall was pretty fun but Miranda’s friend never showed up. I bought some stuff. Like a shirt that had Shauna New Jersey on it. I also bought some earrings and a bracelet that me and Miranda really like. We are going to share it. One more day on this road and then I’ll see if Laura is there. Whoop-ie! I can’t wait!

Dear Diary, 10-11-05

We set up, if there is anything to set up. No sign of Laura but it is 10:55 pm so yea. I was thinking of having a party here but who would I invite? Maybe Laura if she is here, but I don’t know if she is so don’t ask me because I don’t know. I sure hope this is the place where Laura is so I can ask her what she was going to write in this diary of mine. Don’t you want to know too?

Dear Diary, 10-12-05

I haven’t seen Laura yet. Miranda is having a party because apparently she was here 1 year ago so she knows some of the people here. I am going to have Miranda ask at the Information office if Laura Is here. I would be so happy because no one knows how a foster child feels unless you are one. Now, I think I am lucky that I never met my mom therefore I don’t know what I miss about her.

Dear Diary, 10-13-05

Today we are having the party. This will determine if Laura is here or not. I will be terribly disappointed if she is not. I can’t wait to see if she is. Miranda says her mother was a witch. How horrid would that be? I mean, having being scared and all, all the time! Wow. I don’t really believe her but why would she lie to me? We’ve been getting along like sisters. Well, not like sisters because sisters fight a lot. But, you know! We are really close.

Dear Diary, 10-14-05
Sadly, Laura is not here. I can’t decide if I am mad or just plain regular. I mean, what are the chances of Laura being at this exact camping place. Tomorrow, I’m going to look for more kids to see if I can play with them, well, I suppose I can go join the little gathering… but that would rather stay here and go on the internet on my computer. How could I have thought that she was here? Well, I’ll tell Miranda, and hope she’s not mad, but I am mad. I wish Laura were here. I know that if she were here, I wouldn’t be bored, but still… I AM BORED, DUH!! I am not making any sense. Gosh, maybe I’ll just stay here and play VEPCOT. That is Virtual Experience People’s Children Offering Tons-of-fun!. EPCOT. Or, aka, Epcot as in Smisney. Do you know what that is? Well, it is this great place, so yea.


Dear Diary, 10-15-05

O-M-G!!! Guess who I saw at the store today??? GUESS GUESS GUESS!! Ok, give up??? Well, don’t because it starts with a L and ends with an A!! Did you get it yet? Goodness, how long does it take, fine, I’ll give you the answer, IT IS LAURA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Plus, you remember about VEPCOT? Well, she plays too and it just so happens that when I was on VEPCOT, I was actually talking to her. She didn’t know I was here and all so yea! We are getting together in about one hour, so I need to go get ready, I just had to write this down and I can say, so far, this is probably the best day of my life!


Dear Diary, 10-16-2005

Laura is having a sleepover at our Motorhome tonight. I can’t wait. She’s going to show me around today. I was at her motorhome earlier. I never knew she had a motor home… cool. Don’t you think so too??? I know I know it will be awesome. Well, I have a tummyache and I don’t want to miss out on the fun tonight so I’m gonna rest. G’bye!


Dear Diary, 10-16-2005
OMG, guess what? I have the flu. Stomach flu and I hope I don’t give it to Laura because that would be really really bad! I have to miss out on seeing Laura tonight because I have it. I don’t like being sick. Hang on, I have to barf. There. I barfed… now Miranda is having me get off because she doesn’t want me to barf on our laptop.


Dear Diary, 10-17-05
I still have the stomach flu and I can’t do anything about it. This RV park is in the middle of no where and so we can’t really get any medicine.


Dear Diary, 10-18-05
Guess what? There’s a doctor here in the RV park, good news since this is in the middle of no where and I would think that there is some kind of medical person here, and he gave me medicine and a little check over. I didn’t have the stomach flu, it just turns out I was having really really bad cramps and the doc thinks that the barfing was just because I ate a hotdog… may have been undercooked, I am not sure…. ☹


Dear Diary, 10-19-2005
Laura and I are exploring the campground soon. I am really excited. She said she has a fort when we were talking on VEPCOT. Great, isn’t it? I mean, the world wide web, so much connection throughout a country and an RV park. ☺ I would like to know though, why Miranda is doing so much for me and why she’s acting like I’m leaving. I know I am not though, I mean, how horrible would that be? Getting here, having a good foster mother, meeting my friend I thought would be lost forever, it is just so great, I’d be depressed if it turned out I had to leave….


Dear Diary, 10-20-2005
We had hamburgers. Well, Laura and I were exploring the campground and we found some other kids in our fort. They were really nice and invited us to their camp-site for dinner. Since Miranda and Laura’s parents knew them, we could go…. I liked it. It was nice having friends.


Dear Diary, 10-21-2005
Great news! I just got a letter from my mom… haven’t opened it yet but I am ecstatic…… Miranda opened it and read it then saw it was from my mom! How great is this???? I KNOW I KNOW I TOTALLY KNOW…. OK, I’m going to type it in here…

Dear my beloved Lily,
I am so sorry for abandoning you. Honey, it was all auntie Marmy’s choice. I am so sorry again. What you are about to read will change your life forever dear. I am so happy to write it, I have tears in my eyes. You will be able to come live with me and auntie. You can leave within the week of 10-25-2005 and 11-1-2005. Anytime would work dear, anytime. Personally I hope you come sooner. I can’t wait to see your face after 12 years! Wow, come to think of it, almost 13… I hope you are as excited to come as I am about your coming. I love you dear, I love you.

Your mother,

Carolyn Maryln St. Petersben

No. No. NO NO NO NO NO NO! I can’t have this is happening. I don’t want to go. I don’t want to go back to someone who left me, abandoned me. NO! sure, she goes and blames auntie Marmy. I am not leaving I am not not not leaving! Miranda is crying, I am crying… this is like my worst nightmare. HOW COULD MY MOTHER, of who I am going to call Carolyn because she doesn’t deserve that title of mother, expect me to even want to go back with her? My eyes are welling up with tears and Miranda needs a towel we are crying so hard. I DON’T WANT THIS TO HAPPEN NO NO NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear Diary, later in the day of 10-21-05
I’m not going back. No one can make me. How I am supposed to go back? NO ONE KNOWS WHAT IT IS LIKE? I am about to break the news to my BFFA, Laura……
GUESS WHAT? LAURA THOUGHT IT WAS GREAT THAT I WOULD GO HOME TO MY MOTHER! And she thought the whole “living with about 10 other kids” idea would be good for me…. Good for me? Good for me??????? I want to stay with Miranda…. I think that this whole foster care thing is totally stupid, I mean, they don’t give you a choice if you are going to move or not, they don’t let you choose where you go… in fact, you have no voice in it… you do what you’re told.
I am running away. I must take my jump drive… I’ll ask Miranda for some money, I’ll write in this in an internet café or something, I am running away! (just not telling Miranda)

Dear Diary, 10-30-05
I am in an internet café. I’ve escaped. I am so glad… I’ll find a way somehow to get around… maybe get a job at McMickey’s…. I don’t know… I don’t know!!! I’ve been gone for 8 days but I still have $200 because Miranda gave me $500… I guess she’s rich but I am on a really tight schedule and I am only writing this so that if my jump drive is found in my pocket, everyone will know what happened to me and how tragic my life is… ☹ good good good, I’ll make Marmy and Carolyn pay… I will… they separated me from Miranda and… oh I have to go I am already at the five minute mark and when every minute costs 20 cents, that can lead up, so I have to go… I might write again, I might not.

Dear Diary, 11-30-05
I am barely making it… earning a minimum (at most) wage of $5 a day. I am at a train station and I carry around people’s luggage for them and they pay me. The train station people don’t know I am doing it, I’d probably be arrested for it or something. That $5 a day is letting me get a Mighty Kids meal at McMickey’s.




My family used to foster children... one was even 16! I'm not even 16... it was kinda awkward but Katie (her name) got used to us and even spent a b-day w/us!

She left though, about a year and 1/2 ago... Bye Katie!